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How to Give a Girl Oral Sex & Make Her Moan in Bliss

If you want to be in the good books and give your partner the time of her life, you need to know how to give a girl oral sex in the best possible way.

give her oral sex

According to most studies, only between 30-50 percent of women can achieve orgasm through penetration alone. So, that’s why you need to know how to give a girl oral sex if you want to keep her satisfied.

Chances are, the woman you’re with now, or will be with in the future, will need a little something more. Handily, you’re about to find out all you need to know. [Read: Female confessions – The feeling of oral sex for women]

Why are some men reluctant to give oral sex to women? 

Believe it or not, some guys just don’t like going down on women – much to the woman’s chagrin. So, what are some of the reasons that hold them back? Here are a few.

1. He is insecure about his own body

As strange as it might sound, some guys don’t like going down on women because they think that she will feel obligated to reciprocate. Now, that would sound amazing to most guys. But some men are insecure about the size of their package or how it looks.

Another reason he could be insecure is that he doesn’t know how his body will react when he’s giving oral sex to the woman. He could be worried that he won’t get hard or she won’t get wet. And if that happened, they would be embarrassed. [Read: Weird penis – 10 freaky behaviors that are totally normal]

2. Bad past experiences

A guy might have had an experience with previous partners that has caused him to dislike giving oral sex at all. It could be anything from how the women smelled “down there,” to being worried about being judged that they’re doing it wrong. 

There can be a lot of pressure on guys to perform well during sex. This can leave some of them scared to mess up or make any mistakes. And if he happens to have a perfectionist personality, this could be especially problematic for him. [Read: Female confessions – the feeling of oral sex for women]

3. He feels used

Maybe a guy’s nature is to be a “giver” in all areas of life. And if that’s true, then that’s not a bad thing, right? Well, it could be.

Maybe he has been with women who always demanded oral sex and never did anything to reciprocate.

After a while, he might have associated oral sex with being used or “subservient” to the woman. For a man’s ego, it doesn’t feel good to be subservient. So, if he has always been the giver and never *or rarely* the receiver, then he might be resentful too.

4. Deeply rooted traumatic experience 

No one really likes to talk about child sexual abuse but this could be an issue for your man. He could have had some deeply-rooted traumatic experiences with oral sex when he was a child. [Read: Sex tutorial – 20 things about how to have and enjoy sex no one tells you]

If he was sexually abused, he is also more likely to battle mental health challenges like PTSD *post-traumatic stress disorder*. If this is true, then oral sex can be triggering for him. And he might worry that if he gives oral sex, he might be expected to engage in other sex acts that he isn’t comfortable with.

5. Selfishness

One very common answer for why a man might be reluctant to give oral sex to a woman is just that he’s downright selfish. He could be a selfish person in general, or just in bed. But usually, what goes on in the bedroom is indicative of what kind of person they are outside the bedroom.

A lot of guys are just more concerned with their own pleasure instead of the woman’s. They are more preoccupied with getting their orgasm through sex and aren’t thinking about how much the woman is enjoying – or not enjoying – her sexual experience. [Read: Selfless love – 18 traits that sets it apart from selfish love]

6. He just doesn’t enjoy it

Finally, there might not be any underlying reason as to why a man doesn’t like going down on a woman. It could just be that he doesn’t like it. 

Everyone has different things that turn them on, and maybe giving oral sex just isn’t one of them for him. It might have nothing to do with the woman he is with, it’s just his own preference.

Cunnilingus techniques to blow her mind

Some men won’t even give it at all, but even of those who do, it is often a quick formality before sex. This is the wrong way to approach going down on her. Get in there, get comfortable, and enjoy it.

You should take pleasure in feeling her body tense up, in hearing her moan, and even in her taste and smell. And why not? She’s getting hot, and it’s because of what you’re doing to her. [Read: The hot and easy ways for men to get way better in bed!]

A woman’s vagina is extremely delicate. Countless nerve endings are packed into one area. Touch it the right way and you’ll give pleasure; touch it the wrong way and you’ll cause pain.

Giving great oral sex is not easy, but if you follow these tips and techniques, you’ll make a woman very happy in bed.

1. Hygiene – for both of you

It’s no secret that there’s sometimes a smell down there. By design, the body has scent glands in the genitals, just like in the armpits. Your balls have the same thing.

But society has a lot more jokes about smelly pussy than about sweaty balls, so don’t be surprised if she feels somewhat self-conscious when you go down on her.

It’s fair for you to expect her to be clean, just as you should be if you want a blowjob. Take a shower together before sex to ensure you’re both spotlessly clean and smelling like roses. If it’s an ongoing problem in your relationship, it’s okay to nicely tell her she needs to focus more attention there. [Read: 16 ways to get a girl to give you head and really enjoy it!]

For your part, keep a clean shave or soft, conditioned facial hair. Stubble can be extremely irritating to her soft skin.

2. Be patient

Great oral sex starts well before your face finds its way between her legs. Good foreplay, when done right, is key to getting her warmed up and ready.

A guy is like a light switch, you’re either up *turned on* or down *turned off*. Women are more like a rocket launching; a complex set of systems activated in the right order will eventually turn her on.

Diving straight in, especially with dry fingers, can be quite painful to a woman. Foreplay will bring some natural lubrication to her vagina, and establish a trusting and comfortable mood.

Work your way slowly down her body, paying close attention to her breasts. Even once you’re there, kiss her inner thighs and slowly get closer to her lips. This teasing will build her anticipation and get her ready for what’s next. [Read: 25 hot ways to make a guy go down on you and signs to tell if he likes it]

3. Lips on lips on lips

Another tip to give a girl oral sex is to focus on her lips. This is the point where most guys *those who can find it, anyway* go straight for the clitoris, but it’s not time yet.

After kissing her inner thighs, give soft kisses on her outer lips. Reach one arm under her leg and around over her stomach. Let it rest on her pubic hair.

Part her outer lips with your tongue to expose the inner lips, and kiss them softly. By now they should be wet, or at least moist. Slide your tongue over them, going up one side and down the other a few times, and suck very gently on the sides of the lips. [Read: The sexiest hot spots to kiss a woman and really arouse her]

4. Still not time for the clitoris

Yes, there’s still work to be done before you get there. If you think of the lips as forming a long, vertical ellipse, the inside of this is what you should focus on next.

As a reference, just above this ellipse, tucked into its hood, is the clitoris. Just below it is the perineum, or what people often call the “taint” – that in-between-area that ain’t pussy and ain’t ass.

Push your tongue gently against the bottom of the ellipse, just above the perineum. Keeping light pressure against her, slowly run your tongue up to the top, making sure to stop before you reach the clitoris. [Read: The 10 most arousing erogenous zones for women all men should know]

Do the same from top to bottom, letting your tongue linger at the points, pushing against them with minimal pressure. Repeat, mixing in a few kisses, and a few more sucks on the sides of her lips.

In the bottom third of the ellipse is the vaginal entrance. Push the tip of your tongue slightly inside. The walls of the vaginal opening are extremely sensitive, so always approach them slowly and gently. The tip of your tongue, being soft and wet, should give her a feeling of pleasure. [Read: Foreplay done right – The art of really turning her on]

5. Under the hood

Give a few more slow licks from above the perineum to just under the clitoris. Finally, give another lick, but don’t stop at the top – keep it going up and it will lightly graze her clitoris.

Do this six times, then again but on the seventh, pull your tongue back before it reaches the clitoris.

The clitoris is all about rhythm, but at the start, giving a steady rhythm like this, then breaking it is a great tease. You will feel her body push towards you trying to get the touch it was just becoming accustomed to.

Repeat this for about a minute – six full licks followed by one lick that pulls away at the last second. [Read: 14 amazing types of female orgasms all girls can experience in bed]

Clitorises can vary greatly between women. Some are quite big, others tiny. But they’ll always be in the same place, so it’s just a matter of knowing where to look. As it becomes more stimulated, it will swell and become more prominent.

With the hand you wrapped around her leg and placed on her stomach, pull back slightly on the skin just above the hood and the clitoris will become more exposed. [Read: How to finger a girl – 21 delicate moves to make her squirm and orgasm]

7. Ride the rhythm

Some women like hard pressure applied with the tongue to the clitoris, while some need a lighter touch. With more experience with the same woman, you will understand her needs better, but if you’re not sure, listen to her cues.

Try different motions to see which ones she likes best. Up and down licks and circles around the clitoris work best. Some women also like a side-to-side motion. It’s okay to switch things up, just be sure to keep the rhythm.

Your tongue and jaw will get tired, at least until you are giving oral sex on a regular basis. When you need a rest, take her clitoris between your lips and give it a mini-blowjob. This will drive her wild. [Read: The man’s guide to lasting longer during sex without any difficulty]

8. Magic fingers

The above steps alone are often enough, but adding in fingers can help her, and enhance the orgasm. The clitoris is a bit like a small tree, with an immense underground root system.

What you see is just a small part of it. The rest runs under the skin in a wishbone shape, down along both sides of the vagina, nearly to her anus.

It may be hidden, but that doesn’t mean you can’t stimulate it if you know what you’re doing. While still tonguing her clitoris, push one finger slowly into her vagina. Leave it there until she seems comfortable. Add a second finger, but note that for some women this might be uncomfortable. [Read: Intense orgasms checklist – 11 moves to guarantee one all the time]

Your fingerprints should be facing up, and your fingers should be in as far as the second knuckle. Bend your fingers up until they touch the roof of her vagina. You should feel a soft, spongy area there – this is the G-spot.

Start slowly, giving a repetitive “come here” motion with your fingers where you continually caress this area. Keep doing this while your tongue keeps its rhythm on her clitoris and you’ll drive her wild. And this should get her to climax. [Read: 18 awesome sex tips for men to make any woman crave for more!]

How to give a girl oral sex – quick tips to make her moan

Now you’ve seen the routine you should follow to make her squeal with delight, let’s check out a few quick tips. Throw these in with your routine and you’ll make her moan over and over again.

1. Prepare for a long oral session

Even if you managed to give your partner an oral orgasm before, it is practically impossible for you to replicate the exact conditions of the moment you gave her the orgasm.

Female orgasms happen after she releases that build-up of sexual tension from your lip work. This “build-up” tends to be a long process. There’s no shortcut around it.

Therefore prepare yourself by keeping your stamina going and adopting a comfortable position in order to avoid getting a stiff neck when it’s underway. [Read: 7 problems ‘down there’ that you shouldn’t ignore]

2. Tongue switch

When learning cunnilingus techniques your tongue is the one doing the work. Prolonged use renders it dry and numb. This happens due to the saliva evaporating making flesh contact rough, ultimately wearing down the muscles that allows you to control the tongue.

One way to ease this problem is by switching between the top and bottom surfaces of the tongue.

The top gives that bumpy texture from the papillae which women love while the obverse side has a smooth slick surface which allows easier sliding action. Alternating between the two surfaces allows you to last longer during cunnilingus. [Read: What does an orgasm feel like?]

3. Try a blindfold

Blindfolds help minimize external stimuli, making her less distracted from your chomping face and more focused on the sensations coming from her lady parts.

As far as cunnilingus techniques go, it’s not ALL about the tongue! [Read: Blindfold sex: 14 sensual ways to use blindfolds in bed]

4. Mind her reaction

If you think about it, performing cunnilingus is like picking a lock. You’re basically blind and your only clue is by listening to the sounds the lock makes.

In the same way, the only way to know if you’re doing it correctly is when she says *or moans* so. It is important to pay attention to how she reacts to what you are doing.

There are a lot of ways to give her oral and some cunnilingus techniques result in a variety of reactions. If you do something that makes her silent as a grave, stop and move your tongue another way. Keep switching until you find that sweet spot that would make her moan and beg for more until she finishes. [Read: What does a vagina feel like? 21 confessions from men]

5. Encouragement is key

She may be feeling a little self-conscious, so encourage her by telling her how much you want to do this and how she tastes and smells so good. Make some noise as you go and she’ll feel the vibrations too.

Before you know it, she’ll be so lost in pleasure she’ll push aside all her inhibitions.

6. Lock eyes

Don’t assume that you need to keep your eyes down and get on with the job. Look up and watch her facial expressions. You could even encourage her to look at you.

Locking eyes is extremely sexy and makes the experience even more intimate than it already is. [Read: Eye contact during sex will take your orgasm to the next level]

7. Go for multiple orgasms

Don’t assume you have to stop after she’s had her first orgasm. Keep going! As long as she’s not super sensitive, she may be able to come again pretty soon afterward.

Listen to her reactions and avoid direct contact with the clitoris straight afterward – slowly build back up to it. The key to the best cunnilingus techniques is patience.

8. Don’t directly attack her clitoris

The clitoris is a very sensitive spot. We all know that just a tiny touch will be enough to send her knees buckling. However, focusing on this area alone leads to a boring and sometimes painful experience for her.

Moving back to teasing, it will be better if you deliberately avoid stimulating her clitoris and focus on the area near and around it. This gives her that anticipation and that “almost there” sensation which leads to a more powerful orgasm. [Read: 46 secrets to sexually arouse a woman mentally but not make it obvious]

9. Light touches like a feather

In addition to avoiding direct contact with her pleasure place, it also helps if you use very subtle and light touches on her lady parts.

Light touches like a graze of the tip of your tongue gives her the anticipation and tweaks her clitoris to be more sensitive in order to feel your tongue better. It’s like tricking a prey to get out of the den for the capture. [Read: 10 sexy ways to please the clitoris]

10. Learn to sustain the pressure when the time comes

One problem that arises is that the guy fails to keep his tongue in motion due to fatigue by the time she’s about to come. Remember that when you find the sweet spot, keep stimulating her button until the end, and don’t even dare to stop.

If you do, you’ll end up with a very frustrated girl.

The last few seconds prior to orgasm is the decisive moment so you need to endure and sustain until she finishes. This is why it helps you to get into a comfortable position, and be mindful of her reactions to know if she’s about to come or not. [Read: How to eat a girl out – 15 secrets to make any girl scream]

11. Know the best tongue movements

Most women love up and down movements, circular motions, side to side, the figure eight, and rapid pulsating on one spot of the clitoris.

When learning about cunnilingus techniques, know your tongue movements! [Read: 8 crucial moves you need to do to turn your girl on]

12. Make sure she’s relaxed and comfortable

She may not be relaxed. If she’s not relaxed she won’t be able to fully enjoy it.

So, let her know she can relax, and that’ll ease her mental state. It takes a little longer for a woman to orgasm, so she may be feeling self-conscious because of that.

You can learn all the best cunnilingus techniques but if she’s not relaxed, it’s no use. [Read: 8 tips and tricks to give her oral sex like a pro]

13. Use toys

Now, you don’t have to use them right away. We suggest learning how to work your tongue and fingers first, and then you can step it up. But using a vibrator is a great way to amp it up.

Plus, women take an average of 20 minutes to climax from oral sex, so unless you have outstanding stamina, throw in the vibrator to prevent jaw cramping.

14. Think of it like a movie

Cunnilingus is like a movie? Huh? Well, you know, they start out slow, you’re getting to know the plot and characters, then there’s some drama, and it ends with a finale. That’s what you want.

Start off slowly, and then build up the momentum, increasing the pressure and speed. [Read: Where to kiss a girl]

15. Only do it if you like it

If you don’t like doing it, then she’s not going to enjoy it. Did you ever get a blow job from a girl who hated doing it? It was probably the most unsatisfying blow job of your life.

Cunnilingus is no different. [Read: 16 ways to get your girl to give you head and like it]

16. Don’t re-enact porn

Porn is porn for a reason. Don’t try to be a cunnilingus porn star, so just admit that you’re not one.

Let this moment be intimate and sexual, not like you have a camera in your face for 15 minutes of fame. When learning cunnilingus techniques, just be yourself, not someone you’ve seen in a porn movie.

17. Think of what YOU like

When you receive a blow job, you don’t want the girl to bite your penis. That being said, she doesn’t want you biting her clit – it’s sensitive.

So, treat her clitoris like your penis when you are giving her cunnilingus. [Read: What does a vagina taste like?]

18. Remember to use your fingers too

Don’t forget your fingers. While you’re using your tongue, you can slip a couple fingers in there and finger her at the same time. Or, you can rub her anus for extra pleasure.

Fingers are a great way to take some pressure from your mouth and give your tongue a break. [Read: Magic fingers – The sexual art of using your fingers right]

19. Remove your ego

Your goal is to make her orgasm, we know. But if that’s all you’re thinking about, you’re actually taking away from the moment.

So leave your ego at the door because you need to focus on making her feel good, not achieving your personal goals when giving cunnilingus. [Read: The 5 types of vagina that make up all the all the vaginas in the world]

20. Don’t forget the anus

Many people neglect that beautiful little hole when performing cunnilingus. But not you! Not after reading this!

Give some love to the anus by pressing it with your finger and inserting a finger inside of it. Just make sure your finger is wet or else it could sting.

However, not all women like this so make sure you ask her first. [Read: How to eat a girl out – 15 secrets to make her scream]

21. Educate yourself

The best cunnilingus techniques are educated ones. If you’re not sure where the clitoris is, before you stick your tongue down there, you should google it.

Educate yourself about the vagina before you start exploring. [Read: Clitoris stimulation – 10 sexy ways to please the clitoris]

22. Try not to stop

When you’re getting a blow job, the worst thing that could happen is when you’re just about to ejaculate and she stops. Same thing goes for her.

Your jaw might be cramping and your tongue may be sore, but don’t stop!

23. Try breast/nipple play

Many women become extremely aroused when you play with their breasts, especially the nipples. So, why not throw that in when learning about cunnilingus techniques?

All you need to do is reach up and play around a little. She’ll be writhing with pleasure before you know it. [Read: Nipple play – 26 ways to focus on a girl’s breasts and make her orgasm]

24. Keep her underwear on

We know what you’re thinking – how are you supposed to get to the good stuff if it’s covered up? Well, licking and sucking through her underwear can be extremely arousing and the feel of your tongue through the material will drive her crazy.

As she gets really turned on, remove her underwear and go to town with the cunnilingus techniques.

25. Use your breath

Warm breath on a very sensitive clit is a serious turn on, so when you’re using your tongue, don’t forget to allow your breath to do some of the work too. [Read: 19 foreplay sex games for couples to get naughty and horny in minutes]

Oral sex positions to take things to another level

Cunnilingus techniques aren’t all about what you do with your tongue, the position she’s in can also play a huge part in her pleasure. Just like regular sex positions, cunnilingus positions matter too.

1. The Kivin Method

This method means that your partner lies on her back and as the giving partner, you lay on your side and approach her vulva from there. This position gives more vulval stimulation and may be more comfortable for you too.

2. Oral sex from behind

Imagine that you’re having sex in the doggy style position and you won’t go far from. She leans over and you approach her from behind, licking upward. This position gives her a totally different sensation to what she may be used to. [Read: 9 ways to make doggy style your favorite sex position]

3. Face sitting

You lay down and she squats over your face. You then perform your cunnilingus techniques of choice from your chilled out, laid down position!

The plus point here is that she can move up and down to get the extra sensation she may need.

4. Oral on your knees

The regular blow job ideal is a woman kneeling down in front of the man, right? Well, what’s stopping you from doing the same?

Get down on your knees as she stands and worship her vulva and clit like she deserves! [Read: Attention men – 9 things you must do more often]

5. Sitting down oral

This position gives her more comfort and allows you to really get into the heart of the action. Here, she sits on a chair, the kitchen table, or a living room chair with her legs draped over the sides. You then lean down or kneel, whichever is more comfortable, and go for it.

6. Pillow method

As she lays down, place a pillow under her hips. This will lift her pelvis up toward you and make it easer for you to get to the parts that matter. [Read: Pillow humping – How to hump a pillow and the naughty ways to do it]

Can STDs spread during oral sex?

Now you know all about the best cunnilingus techniques and how to make your girl go crazy, we need to cover one more important subject before we leave you to your own devices. yes – consider using a dental dam

Yes, STDs can spread during oral sex. These include chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, herpes, HPV, HIV, and trichomoniasis.

The best way to protect yourself is to ensure hygiene and to use a dental dam. Make sure you throw the dental dam away after use and use a clean one the next time. Also, never give oral if your partner has active sores or cuts down below. [Read: STDs 101 – The most common types and their symptoms]

Now you know the best cunnilingus techniques, what are you waiting for?

Far too many men are squeamish when it comes to giving a girl oral. But, if you’re happy for her to give you a blowjob, isn’t it fair to reciprocate?

The truth is that most women can’t orgasm through penetration alone and if you want to increase her chances anyway, getting her hot under the collar beforehand is the way to go. You’ll seriously rev her engine with these cunnilingus techniques and tips.

What are you waiting for?

[Read: 5 goofproof moves to make a girl squirt like she’s peeing]

A great lover is a very good thing to be. Now that you know how to give a girl oral sex, get out there and try out these cunnilingus techniques.

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Eli Walton
I'm a freelance writer dividing my time between the beaches of Thailand and my hometown of Chicago....