Did your partner tell you they like talking dirty?
Or do you have the urge to seduce your lover with words?
Learning how to dirty talk in bed is the easiest thing to do if you understand the little details that matter.
You may feel awkward or find the whole idea embarrassing to begin with.
But when you realize that there’s nothing dirty about dirty talking, and that it’s actually really sexy and arousing, and can do wonders for your sex life, you may even start to like it!
[Read: 20 hot sex ideas to blow your lover’s mind in bed!]
How to dirty talk and arouse your lover
Dirty talking is an art, but more than that, it’s a power you wield.
Every relationship needs some fire and spice in the bedroom now and then.
It’s the only way you can keep sex exciting and fun, even as the years roll by.
[Read: Top 50 kinky sex ideas to have a sexy relationship]
And dirty talking, well, that’s one of the sexiest ways to keep the passion alive in a sexy relationship.
23 sexy tips to dirty talk and say the sexiest words
Have you ever dirty talked with your boyfriend or girlfriend? To a few, dirty talking comes naturally.
But if you’re one among many others who want to talk dirty but don’t know how to go about it, read on and you’ll master the art of dirty talking within the next few minutes! [Read: How to talk dirty to a guy and turn him on instantly]
Warming up and introducing dirty talk in your relationship
The biggest hurdle that many lovers experience while trying to talk dirty is initiation. Most couples just don’t know how to start talking dirty.
To make it easier for you to relate to, think of dirty talking as the first kiss in your relationship. You know you want to do it, you know your partner wants to do it, but both of you just don’t know how to initiate it or even talk about it because it just feels too awkward!
Use these steps and you’ll see that dirty talking, really, is just as simple as saying ‘I love you’!
#1 Start by flirting with your partner. If you don’t know how to initiate dirty talk, start by teasing or flirting with your partner while hanging out together. Ask your partner if they can remember the first time both of you made out with each other. That’s a good way to talk dirty while reminiscing at the same time.
You can also ask your partner a few naughty questions, which can initiate dirty talking too. [Read: 30 questions for couples to keep the spark alive in love]
#2 Have erotic conversations. Erotic conversations are a great way to initiate dirty talk. Create a fantasy situation and ask your partner what they’d do in that scenario.
For example, ask your partner what he or she would do to you if both of you were just friends and you were passed out drunk in their room wearing nothing. Let your imagination run wild, and your partner’s mind will follow! [Read: 30 dirty would-you-rather questions to have an erotic conversation]
#3 Texting and phone sex. It is pretty awkward to talk dirty when both of you are sitting face to face. So for starters, keep it stress free. Text your partner late at night and share a few kinky details like what you’re wearing, or how much you miss having them with you. Before you know it *as long as you ask the right questions*, both of you may end the night in orgasms. [Read: 20 sexy text examples to start a sexy conversation and talk dirty]
Once you’re past the sexting stage, try to talk naughty over the phone. Get into bed, turn off the lights, close your eyes and let your imagination run wild. [Read: How to have phone sex like a sexy sassy minx]
#4 Talk dirty to yourself. If you want to feel really comfortable talking naughty or want to practice it a few times, try talking dirty to yourself before you talk to your partner. Play with yourself or use a toy, and let a few sexual fantasies take over your mind.
#5 Describe your actions. If you’ve had phone sex, you really shouldn’t feel awkward about trying it in person now. When both of you are lying in bed with each other, talk about every single thing you plan to do to your partner before you actually do it. The anticipation you build up by talking it before doing it will arouse your partner a lot more.
#6 Build fantasies in your head. When you’re in bed with your lover, cuddle up and have an erotic conversation with them. Tell your partner what you’re thinking about, especially if it’s something naughty and dirty. Create a story in your mind and visualize it together, while indulging in foreplay at the same time. [Read: 12 foreplay tips that always work on men!]
Dirty talking using the right words the horny way!
Now that you know how to initiate dirty talking with your lover, learn to arouse your partner a lot more by using the right words. [Read: 50 dirty things to say to your boyfriend and arouse him like crazy!]
#7 Use words that work for you. When you try to talk dirty with your partner, you don’t need to use words you’re not familiar with just to sound more poetic or more like the erotic novels you read. Be yourself, and say the things you want to say.
#8 The sexy voice. The way you say something matters a lot more than what you say! Use your I’m-horny voice while whispering something in your lover’s ears. [Read: 6 tips to have a sexy voice in bed]
#9 Sexy names in bed. Some words sound a lot sexier and arouse your partner when you say it with your horny voice. Use words like baby, honey, sexy, dirty boy, or anything else you find arousing. Even calling your partner out by their name can work them up in bed.
#10 Use the right words. Don’t get biological in the words you use while describing a body part. Call his member a cock or a dick, and don’t call it a penis. And calling a vagina a vagina in bed can scare a few guys! Pussy sounds so much sweeter. Remember, the dirtier the name, the sexier it sounds while dirty talking.
#11 Use dirty words. Brush up your bad language. Use filthy words in bed each time you need to describe something. Screaming “I’m so f*ckin’ horny!” sounds so much sexier than saying “I’m wet”.
#12 Say what you feel in a dirty way. If you’re getting turned on, say it. If you want your partner to do something more, say it out loud. Dirty talking also helps both of you sexually understand each other better.
#13 The gasps and the moans. It’s not just words that sound sexy and dirty. Heavy breathing, moaning, gasping, breathing into your lover’s ears, and slapping them sound just as sexy as dirty words. Purr and go mmm mmm, and scream out loud too! [Read: 15 dirty ways to have the sexiest rough sex ever!]
Indulging in dirty talk with your lover
Once you initiate dirty talking in bed, the rest of it comes naturally. Both of you would be able to spin sexual fantasies out of thin air and each time you have sex, you can make it feel just like the first time all over again!
Use these dirty talking tips here to heighten the experience and feel more confident and sexy in bed.
#14 Show yourself off. What you say in bed could arouse your partner a lot, but if you want to take it a notch higher, let your partner see you do things to yourself. As you say something sexy, slide your hands along your own body and play with yourself. Show yourself off, and just watching you enjoy yourself will turn your partner on more! [Read: How to turn yourself on using your five senses]
#15 Guide your partner. Guide your partner’s hands and be vocal about it. Make your partner feel wanted, which will make them feel hornier. Grab their hands and run it over your body, and if something feels good, let them know how you feel.
#16 Demand and command your partner. Order your partner to do something to you in the heat of the moment. Say something like “bite me on my neck…”, “slap my butt harder” or “f*ck me like I’m your one night stand”
Talk about particular body parts and say things like “I want to claw your back until you bleed!” or “I want you to squeeze my boobs hard!” Describe what you feel and what you want to do to a particular body part.
#17 Create an alter ego. When you get into bed, transform yourself into someone new and sexy. You could be a coy sex kitten or a bossy dominatrix, or replay the lead characters of the Beauty and the Beast or a movie. Call your partner out by their fantasy name while having sex with them, and behave just like your alter ego would! [Read: Sexy ideas to role play in bed and have a sexier time]
#18 Confidence. Think sexy. And you’ll feel sexy. Confidence matters a lot while making love. If you like how you look naked, you’ll feel more comfortable doing things to yourself or letting your partner watch you. [Read: 15 real life tips to look better naked]
#19 Be spontaneous. Say what you feel, and don’t think too much about phrasing it right. If a thought arouses you or a dirty word makes you horny, say it out. Talking dirty should come naturally, and if you try phrasing the words or hold thoughts back, you’d only end up feeling distracted in bed.
#20 Turn on your wild side. Say things you could never imagine saying to your lover when you’re not on a sexual high. Whisper arousing lines that would make you blush in real life. Bring out the sexy animal in you and shed your inhibitions when you talk dirty. You’ll feel liberated, and a lot closer to your partner.
#21 Mutual arousal. You may like a few fantasies or dirty words and they may turn you on a lot. But your partner may find something that arouses you rather boring because they can’t connect with your fantasy. [Read: Does your partner fantasize about sleeping with another person?]
Make the dirty talk work for both of you. You may like rape fantasies while your partner may like groping fantasies in the club. Try to find common ground that works for both of you and mix your fantasies together.
#22 Communicate with each other. Dirty talking can do wonders for your sex life. But both of you need to discuss the sexy conversations with each other while cuddling up in bed after the act, especially if the dirty talking involved something awkward or taboo. [Read: The right way to fantasize together about someone else in bed]
Remember, sexual fantasies are dirty thoughts in the mind and doesn’t have to turn into a reality at any point of time. But talking about these dirty fantasies can help make the relationship stronger and both of you would feel more reassured even though the deepest, darkest fantasies are out in the open.
[Read: Top 10 sexual fantasies for girls and top 10 sexual fantasies for guys to dirty talk about in bed]
#23 Don’t tease each other. Dirty talking is spontaneous, and it can bring out a few weird phrases or conversations while having sex. So if your partner says something weird or bizarre, don’t use the excuse to tease your lover about it.
A man may like being called a manwhore in bed, but he may feel embarrassed if you tease him about it. And by teasing him, you’d only make him feel more self conscious about his sexual fantasies and he may even withhold his fantasies or dirty words the next time you have sex because he’ll be scared you’ll use his words against him later.
[Read: The guide to talking dirty in bed – Examples and more ideas]
And now that you’ve understood these 23 tips on how to dirty talk, you’re finally ready to talk naughty and get kinky in bed. Use these tips and you’ll see just how amazing sex can feel when you use a few dirty words in bed!
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