So many people ask what is foreplay and wonder if it’s just a waste of time. But in truth, it’s an integral part of sex where all the fun actually happens!
If you remember the best sexual experience you had, foreplay was probably a big part of it. But what is foreplay really?
What is foreplay?
The touching, licking, sucking, caressing – it all is bundled up in one word: foreplay. Think of it like warming a car before driving it. I know, you really want to hit the gas pedal and go. But maybe it’s better to wait for the engine to warm up. You get what I mean?
17 ways to enjoy foreplay and leave anyone incredibly hot and horny
Foreplay is about sexually and mentally connecting with your partner. You don’t have to marry them, but the sex is the best when you have a connection under the sheets. Taking the time to feel your partner and heighten their senses is what makes the difference between sex and “oh my God, you have no idea what I did last night” sex. Aim for the latter.
Sex is more than just intercourse, and it really has to include foreplay. So, here are 17 foreplay tips that’ll almost always lead to mind-blowing sex after!
#1 Intercourse comes after. I know you want to get to the main event, but foreplay isn’t about vaginal intercourse. That’s coming a bit later. Foreplay is everything but that. Think of it like you’re prepping for intercourse. Your goal is to arouse your partner so that all they want is to have sex. They can’t handle the thought of not having sex with you. Boom. You can thank foreplay for that. [Read: How to foreplay – The key to the best sex of your life]
#2 Focus on your partner. This isn’t about you. You need to focus your attention away from your own body and focus it on your partner. If they’re focusing on you, well, then it’s a perfect blend. You’ll both be trying to arouse each other, and well, that can only lead to a positive outcome.
#3 Don’t rush the clock. When it comes to understanding what is foreplay, you need to remember that it isn’t a race. You’re going to have sex, don’t worry. But there’s no point rushing foreplay. Remember, you’re warming up a car. If you drive it too soon when the engine is still cold, it’s not going to run well. Take your time and enjoy the moment.
#4 Make out… high school style. Everyone loves making out, especially women. So, whether you’re a man or woman, take advantage of a good make out session. It can take you a long way. Plus, women get more aroused while making out, so, it’s a win-win situation. [Read: 10 foreplay moves every guy needs to do to their ladies]
#5 Ask what turns them on. If you’re not sure if what you’re doing is working, just ask them. Ask them what turns them on. Trust me, they’re horny, so they’re going to tell you. All you need to do is listen. If you can do that, well, then you’ll be fine with following instructions.
#6 Use tongue. Don’t forget to use that beautiful tongue of yours. Use it while making out, during oral sex, while they’re kissing your body, while you’re caressing theirs. You can use your tongue at almost any moment, and if you pick a sensitive area *like the earlobes*, it’ll hit their nerve endings and make them even more aroused. [Read: Secret pleasure triggers to arouse any woman instantly]
#7 Talk dirty. Not everyone likes dirty talk, but most people like hearing a couple words here and there. You don’t have to be vulgar, but you can say things like, “that feels so good” or “I want you inside me.” See, they’re not too extreme, but it’ll definitely turn them on when they hear it being whispered in their ear.
#8 Foreplay it up in public. Foreplay doesn’t have to start in the bedroom. Get that going when you’re out in public. I’m not saying you have to give them oral sex in the middle of a grocery store. But you can do things like holding their hand, caressing their neck, and kissing them softly. Although you may not notice, your partner will slowly be getting aroused before you even get home. [Read: 12 foreplay moves that work exceptionally well on men]
#9 Slow it down. Slow it way down. Foreplay doesn’t have to be super aggressive, I mean it can be, but it’s fun to switch up the tempo. Have you seen the movie Ghost? The scene where they’re sculpting clay? Anyways, watch that scene. That’s foreplay, and they’re moving at an amazingly slow speed.
#10 Grind. You don’t necessarily have to stimulate yourself or them. You can grind against your partner, and that’ll work just as well. It’s also great if you have some music going on in the background. If you have some rhythm, sync your grind along with the song. It’s hot. You can try straddling them and grinding, that’s usually a great way to stimulate your partner.
#11 Remove one of the five senses. As you already know, humans have five senses. However, when one sense is restricted, the other senses heighten. So, what you can do is blindfold your partner or tie up their hands, preventing them from using that sense. By restricting them and that sense, you arouse them and also open their other senses – a double whammy. [Read: Foreplay done right – the art of really turning her on]
#12 Massage. Your goal is not to put your partner to sleep, but rather, your goal is to get them horny. If you’re too massage-focused, you’ll turn into a day spa, and that’s not the goal here. Try to hit the areas that will turn your partner on. So, I’m talking about the mid-to-lower back, arms, shoulders, and inner thighs.
#13 Let your hands explore. You have two hands for a reason. You’re supposed to use them to touch and explore. So, this is no different. Get those hands moving, and use them to rub and caress your partner. You can simply use a single finger and run it down their body. The power is in your hands.
#14 Undress your partner. But do it nice and slow. Be sensual with it. You may not even think of it, but undressing someone can be highly arousing if you do it slowly and passionately. Feel their body with your fingers as you take off their shirt and pants. You’ll get them naked eventually, don’t worry, so just enjoy it. [Read: 17 really fun foreplay ideas for women]
#15 Oral sex. Oral sex is a pretty big component of foreplay. I mean, you don’t have to have oral sex, however, it usually leads to oral sex anyways. Don’t be shy to go down on your girl or give your man a blowjob. Tease them by almost reaching the point where they come and then pull back… they’ll go nuts.
#17 Bring in the toys. This is when you bring out the sex toys. I mean, you can bring them out during sex too, but this is a great opportunity to test things out and see what turns your partner on or off. Dildos, vibrators, strap-ons, handcuffs – there’s an endless supply of toys to play with.
So what is foreplay? Simply put, foreplay is your best friend in bed, so follow these tips and use them the next time you’re with your partner. If this doesn’t blow their minds, I don’t know what will.
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Natasha Ivanovic is an intimacy, dating, and relationship writer best known for her writings on Kiiroo, LovePanky, Post Pravda, and more. She's the creator and ...