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Eye Contact During Sex: The Science & 18 Intimate Ways to Feel Less Awkward

Holding eye contact during sex can seem a bit awkward at first, but it is a powerful tool used to build intimacy between partners and create a deeper bond.

eye contact during sex

Do you or your partner have eyes-closed sex, or do you prefer to lock gazes with your lover and soak up the moment? Depending on your answer, you may not be surprised to learn that 32% of couples don’t make any eye contact during sex.

Whether you’re an avid eye-gazer or a firm believer in the magic of closed eyes, this topic probably sparked a curiosity in you.

Maybe you’ve never given it much thought, or perhaps it’s something you’ve pondered during those intimate moments with your partner. [Read: Sexual intimacy – the meaning, 20 signs you’re losing it & secrets to grow it]

The science of eye gazing during intimate moments

Have you ever locked eyes with someone across a crowded room and felt an instant connection? Now, imagine taking that connection into the bedroom.

Eye contact during intimate moments can be both thrilling and intense. But why? Let’s break it down without getting too starry-eyed about it:

1. Oxytocin connection

You know that warm and fuzzy feeling when you’re snuggled up with someone special? That’s oxytocin at work, and it’s not shy about coming out during eye contact.

Eye gazing can release this “cuddle hormone,” building trust and bringing you closer. Literally, biology playing Cupid! [Read: 17 health benefits of hugging, etiquette & secrets to make you cuddle more]

2. Mirror neurons firing

Have you ever found yourself mirroring your partner’s actions without thinking about it? That’s thanks to mirror neurons.

These nifty brain cells help us understand and empathize with others. When you lock eyes, these neurons are like, “Hey, we get each other!” creating a sense of togetherness.

3. Activation of the limbic system

That intense emotion you feel when making eye contact? You can tip your hat to the limbic system, the emotional center of your brain.

It’s like turning the dial up on your feelings, making everything more vivid and alive. [Read: Eye contact attraction – it’s powerful, but is it fatal or real?]

4. Cultural and personal factors

We’re not all wired the same way, and culture, personal beliefs, and past experiences can have a big say in how we view eye contact during sex.

For some, it’s the ultimate form of intimacy. For others, it’s like eating pizza with a fork – just not right!

A guide to eye contact during sex – looking into each other’s eyes without feeling awkward

Eye contact during sex sounds simple, right? Just two people gazing lovingly into each other’s eyes. But let’s be honest, sometimes it can feel more like an awkward stare-down than a romantic connection.

Whether you’re a pro at locking eyes or just curious about trying it, we’ve got some practical tips to help you explore eye contact during sex without feeling like you’re taking part in some strange staring competition.

1. Understanding comfort levels

Talking is key. And we don’t mean chatting about the weather! Open up to your partner about your desires and boundaries. Ensure you and your partner are comfortable with each other before you embark on your intimate journey together.

2. Easing into it

If locking gazes during the deed feels too intense at first, try practicing during less intimate activities. Holding hands and staring deeply into each other’s eyes can be a good start. Think of it as a warm-up exercise!

3. The role of lighting

Do you often feel like a deer in headlights when making eye contact? Soft lighting can create a comfy atmosphere for eye contact during sex, making the experience feel more natural and less, well, blinding.

4. Finding the right position

Experiment with different physical positions that make eye contact more enjoyable. And remember, it’s not a staring contest – unless that’s your thing. No judgment here! [Read: 17 most intimate sex positions & tips to feel romantic while making love]

5. Practicing mindfulness

Being present and connecting through the eyes can be a powerful experience. Techniques like synchronized breathing can help you feel more in tune. It’s like a love connection, minus the WiFi.

6. Embracing the awkward moments

Feeling a bit awkward? That’s okay! Laugh it off together. Eye contact during sex is like learning a new dance, it might take a few tries to find the rhythm.

Eyes wide shut – the appeal of eyes-closed sex

When it comes to eyes-closed sex, we’re not talking about snoozing through the experience. Some people prefer to shut their peepers during those intimate moments, and it’s not just because they’re shy! [Read: Sexual anxiety – 25 secrets to not feel nervous about having sex & enjoy it]

From sensory focus to avoiding too much intimacy, there are plenty of reasons why eyes-closed sex might be the way to go for some. Let’s open our minds to this fascinating subject:

1. Sensory focus

Closing the eyes isn’t about ignoring your partner, it’s about turning up the volume on other senses. Think about it: ever notice how food tastes better when you close your eyes? It’s the same principle.

By closing your eyes during sex, you might find touch, smell, and taste heightened, leading to a more immersive experience. [Read: Blindfold sex – 18 sexy tips & positions to mute one sense and explore sex]

2. Psychological comfort

Eye contact can feel super intimate, but for some, it’s like being on stage under a spotlight.

Closing the eyes can ease those nerves, making things more relaxed and less self-conscious. It’s like turning off the lights and letting the music guide the dance.

3. Fantasy enhancement

Have you ever found yourself lost in a daydream with your eyes closed? Eyes-closed sex can allow for greater imagination, helping with role-playing or envisioning specific fantasies. It’s like giving your brain a blank canvas to paint on, and who doesn’t love a little creativity?

4. Avoidance of intimacy

For some, intense eye contact during sex is just a bit too close for comfort.

Choosing eyes-closed sex can be a way to enjoy physical pleasure without diving into the deep emotional waters. Think of it as enjoying a pool from the shallow end.

Striking a balance – tips and insights

Eye contact during sex or eyes wide shut? It’s like choosing between chocolate and vanilla, both have their own unique flavors and appeal.

And guess what? You don’t have to pick just one! It’s all about finding the perfect blend that works for you and your partner.

1. Communication is key

They say communication is the cornerstone of a good relationship, and when it comes to sex, it’s no different. Want to try eye contact? Talk about it. Prefer your eyes closed? Share that too. No need for sign language or interpretative dance; just open and honest conversations about what feels right.

2. Exploring together

Think of eye contact and eyes-closed sex as two intriguing dance moves. Try them both!

Experiment with different combinations, like starting with eyes closed and gradually opening them, or switching between the two. Remember, this is your dance floor, and there are no wrong moves!

3. Mindfulness practices

Whether you’re gazing into each other’s eyes or losing yourself with your eyes closed, being present and attentive can enhance the connection.

Consider techniques like mindful breathing or focusing on specific sensations. It’s like turning the HD on your emotional connection. [Read: 18 secrets to relax during sex, free your mind & enjoy a blissful orgasm]

4. Embracing variety

There’s no rulebook saying you have to stick with one style. Embrace the variety! Some days you might feel like connecting through eye contact, other days, you may prefer to focus on other sensations. Think of it as a relationship buffet – you can sample everything!

So there it is, a guide to striking the perfect balance between eye contact and eyes-closed sex. It’s about tuning in, trying new things, and dancing to your own rhythm. And remember, the most important thing is enjoying the journey – no blindfolds required *unless that’s your thing, of course!*.

Explore what feels right for you both

Intimacy in relationships is a personal journey, unique to every individual and couple. Whether it’s eye contact during sex or the preference for eyes-closed, what matters most is finding what suits you and your partner best.

Eye contact during sex is something many people avoid. It can seem intense or even intimidating, but it can also create a deeper connection.

On the other hand, eyes-closed sex offers its own set of sensations and experiences. Neither approach is right or wrong, it’s about exploring and discovering what feels right for you both.

If you want to connect with your partner on a deeper level, eye contact might be exactly what you need to try.

Opening up to this possibility can be a way to enhance your relationship and bring you closer together. So why not give it a try? You might find it’s an experience that changes everything.

[Read: 69 sex position – 26 best positions, ways to do it, tips & most common mistakes!]

Do you prefer to gaze lovingly into your partner’s eyes during sex or keep your eyes shut and let your body guide you? Neither is right or wrong, it’s all about finding which way works best for you!

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Vinod Srinivas Serai
Vin Serai
Vin Serai is the founder of LovePanky.com, and has delved deep into the working of love and relationships for almost two decades. Having dipped his feet in almo...