Did you know that the clit is so fabulous that it has its own awareness week? That’s right! Sponsored by Clitoraid, Clit Awareness Week has run in the month of May for the last 3 years, and it encourages women to enjoy their right to pleasure while also bringing awareness to genital mutilation. Genital mutilation is a horrific practice that still plagues some cultures today.
Despite the fact that the clitoris is one of the most pleasure-inducing parts of a woman’s body, using it to bring about pleasure still remains a mystery to both men and women alike. The clitoris is literally the only part of the body whose sole purpose is to be a pleasure zone!
While this little “button” may appear small, it actually extends behind the vulva and is directly connected to the G-spot *allegedly*! Furthermore, much like the penis, the clitoris also gets engorged once aroused, making the phrase “getting a hard on” applicable to both men and women.
A vast majority of women, up to 70%, require clitoral stimulation during intercourse to achieve orgasm, which makes knowing how to maneuver around this sensitive little area your most important move when it comes to sexual satisfaction. Here are a few things you should be doing in order to bring pleasure through the clitoris.
#1 Always remember: repetition. Women’s bodies, specifically the clit, respond best to repetition. If you’re using circular motions and she’s getting into it, don’t start switching to up and down motions! Always pay attention to your woman’s responses to know which motions she’d like you to keep doing.
#2 Oral pleasures. Many women respond strongly to oral sex and feel that this is the only way they can orgasm with their partner. Whether you’re simply looking to get her excited or you want to show her the final destination, oral is a great starting point.
I used to think the oral sex move of using your tongue to swirl the alphabet around your partner’s clit was just a joke – it’s no joke! This is a great way to make sure you’re moving your tongue around, and it’s also good for learning which movements your partner responds to best. Remember not to ignore other sensitive areas of the vulva, either. Lick around the thighs, lips, and opening *if she’s into that* to give her an even more tantalizing experience. [Read: 8 tips and tricks to give her oral sex like a pro]
#3 Use your hands. We know it’s important to find out what your partner likes, but it’s equally as important to find out how she likes it. There are many different ways to touch the clitoris.
A couple of ways to stimulate it is by touching it with circular motions, with direct stimulation, massaging it while the hood is still over it, rubbing it between your thumb and forefinger or between the lips of the vagina, going up and down, using lube, or by practicing some other technique your girl has discovered.
It should also be noted that if you’re bringing your hands anywhere near the vagina, make sure your nails are clipped and clean since unwanted bacteria can cause UTIs, which are super painful and totally not sexy. [Read: Magic fingers – The sexual art of using your fingers]
#4 Friction through dry humping. Friction is a much-needed friend to clitoral orgasms. While the name doesn’t scream hot and sexy, dry humping is an amazing way to please the clitoris. Get your girl on top of you and have her grind up against your penis. This is a great way for girls to achieve orgasm. Make sure you are both wearing underwear for maximum friction for her. You can do this with the missionary position as well, but it will be easier for her to navigate her pleasure zones if she’s on top.
A naked version of this can also be done, but it may start to get a little slippery! If you do this naked in cowgirl position and she gets too wet to stay on track, simply switch positions, grab your penis, and start rubbing it in circles around her clit. She’ll thank you for it! [Read: Dry humping and the virgin’s guide to orgasms]
#5 Intercourse. After you’ve engaged in a long, exciting session of foreplay and have your girl wet and excited, you’re probably ready to get down to business: intercourse. For many women, it is very hard to orgasm during intercourse without clitoral stimulation. Here are some easy, sexy positions that offer great clitoral stimulation:
– Doggy style. In this position, you have the option to reach around and play with her clitoris, or give her the opportunity to play with herself using her fingers or a sex toy. [Read: 9 ways to make doggy style your favorite position]
– Missionary – CAT position. This is a great position for clitoral stimulation. Get in regular missionary position and then move above her, so that your pelvis is grinding against her clit as you thrust. Many women love this position for having orgasms from intercourse. [Read: 8 ways to make missionary sex magical]
– Girl on top. This position is great, whether she is in cowgirl or reverse cowgirl, as she has the opportunity to find the best position for her to grind her clitoris against you and reach orgasm. If she’s the bouncing type, you can also use your thumb on her clitoris as she does her thing. [Read: 10 girl on top tips to make sex a lot sexier]
#6 Sex toys. When in doubt, use a sex toy! A pocket rocket is a great toy to incorporate into your sex life as it’s not intimidating and is small enough that you can use it on your partner’s clit while you’re inside her or during foreplay to get her all riled up.
As you now know, the clit is an absolute pleasure zone. However, there are several things it will not respond favorably to. In fact, there are many things you can do to hurt the poor thing. Here’s a brief list of no-no’s when it comes to pleasuring the clit.
#1 Quick back and forth motions. Slow is very okay, but fast can hurt! It must be said that this signature porn move of putting your fingers over the vagina or clit and moving it back and forth like a pendulum on sped does not feel good at all. It also makes you look incredibly amateur when it comes to your understanding of how to please a woman.
The only time this should be done is if she is already very wet and excited. Otherwise, you’re more likely to hurt and inflame the clit. Go slow, lovers! She’s not going anywhere.
#2 Pulling the hood up before she’s ready. For lovers who know what they’re doing down south of a woman, they know that the clit lies beneath its protective hood *akin to the foreskin*. This knowledge is fantastic, but that doesn’t mean you should be rushing to pull the clitoral hood up right off the bat. Most women will find this too intense, even bordering on painful.
There is usually no need to do this if your girl is excited enough, as the clit will expand on its own when aroused and allow for marvelous, engorged touching opportunities. [Read: How to turn a girl on and sexually stimulate her mind]
#3 Putting too much pressure on it. Think of the clitoris like a penis for a moment. When your partner is pleasuring your penis with their hand, you want to make sure their grip isn’t moving too fast, too slow, too soft, or too hard. It has to be juuust right. This is the same with the clit.
Putting too much pressure on the clit is uncomfortable and definitely not pleasurable. If you have a penis, you know how sensitive its 4,000 nerve endings can be, but the clit has twice that number! The clit contains 8,000 nerve endings that, when stimulated, can affect 15,000 separate nerve endings throughout the body. That baby’s super sensitive, so be nice!
#4 There is too much of a good thing. As much as your lover may appreciate you trying to give her endless orgasms, the clit is a fickle mistress who sometimes just doesn’t feel like more. While the clitoris has the amazing and mind-boggling capability to bring about multiple orgasms, there are times when, once she’s been satisfied, clitoral stimulation may actually end up turning pleasure into very intense pain.
In short, check with your lady love about whether she’s down with multiple O’s before you start your very thoughtful journey back to her sweet spots. [Read: The step-by-step guide to achieving multiple orgasms]
#5 Ignoring foreplay. If you don’t know this by now, foreplay is absolutely essential to making a woman see fireworks. Women need a lot of attention in the bedroom and need a certain level of arousal if an orgasm is ever going to happen.
Pay attention to her erogenous zones such as her butt, neck, breasts, and inner thighs, and don’t skimp on using your hand, tongue, sex toy, or penis *without penetration* to stimulate her clit before any sex happens! [Read: Squirting – How to stimulate a girl’s clitoris and make her squirt]
There are plenty of ways to please your partner via clitoral stimulation if you learn some basic techniques and keep an open dialogue with your lover. Remember, taking the time to learn about the clit is what will take you from a mediocre partner to an amazing one!
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Waverly Smith is a freelance writer who has been getting paid for spreading her sarcastic take on love, life, and sex since 2010. She is many things that peo...
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