How to Sext the Right Way: 16 Tantalizing Tips You Can’t Ignore

If you want to surprise your partner and add some sizzle, you need to learn how to sext. It might seem awkward at first, but just give it a go!

how to sext

It’s no secret that foreplay is by far the most important aspect when it comes to sex. Without it, one party usually goes home unsatisfied. It’s seriously the first step toward having sex of any kind. So why not go with the best method of foreplay out there: sexting. It’s easy, and once you know how to sext the right way, it’s almost impossible to go wrong!

We’re sure you’ve all heard of sexting already, but just in case you haven’t, sexting is the act of sending sexually explicit photographs or messages via a text message. So in short, you are sex texting.

Now, the extent to which you sext is completely up to you. You can send only messages, throw in some implied nudes, or go all in and send your crush the raunchiest nudies you could possibly take. It’s really up to you. [Read: 30 hot, sexting examples to start a naughty text marathon]

Why is sexting a good idea?

You might be wondering why you need to learn how to sext in the first place. After all, surely you can just speak to your partner face to face. Dirty talk is great, right? Well, yes it is, but sometimes you need to think a little outside of the box if you want to really spice things up.

Sexting is a great idea because it helps you to set the scene and the mood before you even see your partner. You can start sexting earlier in the day and when you finally meet up after work, the fireworks will be unbelievable! It can also be used as a way to bring you closer together if your sex life has gone off the boil a little lately.

As long as you sext safely (more on that shortly), there’s no reason why you can’t make it a regular and very enjoyable part of your relationship. Now, should you sext people you don’t know that well? Erm, well, probably not, but as long as they’re amenable to it then there’s really nothing wrong. [Read: Sexting ideas – 14 sexy tips to effortlessly sext like a real pro]

It’s far better to stick to sexting your actual partner because then you know that you’re going to improve your relationship and send your sex life through the roof. If you sext people you don’t know that well, i.e. people you’re only hooking up with, sure you’ll have great sex, but what about the connection?

Basically, use sexting in the way that feels right to you but always be sure that you’re not upsetting or insulting someone you don’t know that well by sending explicit messages! [Read: How to initiate sexting – Make your partner hot and horny for you]

Learn how to sext and heat up your sex life!

No matter your reason for sexting, follow these rules to make sure you’re doing it correctly and making the most out of your hot, steamy sext session.

1. Start slowly

When you’re first starting out, sexting might be a little uncomfortable, especially with a new person. So make sure you’re taking it easy and starting slowly.

Our suggestion would be to have some flirty conversation and gauge their reaction. If they’re shooting you wink faces, it’s safe to say they might be down for some conversation that’s a little more risqué. [Read: Should you sext? Studies show shy you need to start TODAY!]

2. Build it up

You don’t just arrive at your partner’s house and go straight to sex, right? No. You greet each other, make out a little, undress, do some foreplay, etc. Sexting is much the same way. You have to build up to the juicy stuff.

Start by greeting them like normal, ask them how their day is going. When they ask you how yours is, mention something like, “It’s not bad… but it would be better if you were here ;)” Make sure you throw in a wink so they know the direction in which you’d like to take the conversation. [Read: 40 naughty, playful texts to keep things hot and horny]

3. Choose your time carefully

Trying to sext when your significant other is in the middle of closing a deal on a car at work or is busy doing something else and doesn’t have the time to sit and reply to each message they receive isn’t the best way to go.

Pick a time when you know they’ll be able to read your messages and reply right away. In order to make sexting work the right way, there has to be some back and forth conversation. One-sided sexting just isn’t fun for anyone. If you have to wait an hour or more for a reply, you really won’t be building much tension at all. [Read: How to start sexting your lover when you’ve never done it before]

4. Mention another time you had sex

This is actually more important than most people think. By talking about a sexual encounter the two of you have had before, you’re putting their mind in the exact place you want it to be. And if you’ve ever tried taking sexy pictures of each other in person, you could allude to these shots as well.

Anything subtle like, “I can’t stop thinking about when you did ____ last time ;)” is enough to get their mind in the right place. It’s priming them for your big onslaught of sexual fantasies. [Read: 20 sexy texting examples to start a dirty conversation]

5. Avoid abbreviations

Nothing will kill the mood faster than someone who has absolutely no idea what you mean by cutting a certain word down. It will make your sext too hard to understand and they’ll have to ask what you mean. *hello, boner killer!*

And on that note, make sure you’re spelling stuff correctly, too. Autocorrect is there for a reason, isn’t it?

6. Keep things realistic

Don’t start describing a ridiculous fantasy that is just way too much for your partner to imagine. The best part of sexting is that they can picture the two of you engaging in the acts you’re describing. So, make sure they’re realistic enough for them to believe.

Otherwise, the mood will be killed really quickly because they’ll just roll their eyes and say “yeah right,” and forget about the whole thing. [Read: Top 50 kinky ideas worth trying that would be perfect for sexting]

7. Keep the “we’re not supposed to be doing this” vibe in the air

This works best if the two of you are supposed to be otherwise occupied with work, meetings, at the doctor’s office, etc. This will make things that much more erotic if you both know you should be doing something else. Also, while there’s absolutely nothing wrong with sexting, keep it as taboo and ‘naughty’ in your mind, and it’ll feel so much hotter!

8. Limit your use of emojis

A skillfully placed emoji here and there can actually add amazing things to your sexting. However, if you use too many of them, they can be distracting and cause your partner to not take the conversation very seriously. Use emojis sparingly and when you do use them, make sure they create the right impact. [Read: Emoji sexting – 16 fun emojis to make any conversation sound naughty]

9. Stay away from the corny lines

Unless you know your partner is going to find a certain line ridiculously sexy and turn them on immediately, don’t be cheesy. That’s far more likely to cause hilarity than horniness.

10. Guys, no unsolicited dick pics

There is no angle, lighting, or filter that is going to make a penis look great. So do everyone involved a favor and don’t send these pictures unless your partner asks for one. [Read: 20 really clever and witty ways to respond to a guy’s unwanted dick pic]

11. Build up to the good pictures

If you’re going to be sending pictures, have a gallery ready and don’t send that full nude right away. It just ruins the whole suspense of the sexting. You have to set the stage, so to speak.

Send pictures like you’re slowly undressing yourself for them in still frames, just like they would see you gradually get naked if you were undressing in person. A cleavage shot here, a topless shot there, then progress onwards.

12. Keep images tasteful

There is a difference between a tasteful naked picture and a trashy one. To keep things classy, always leave an element of surprise. This means withholding them from seeing the “money shot.” This will make them eager to get home to you in order to see what you wouldn’t show them. That’s how you sext the right way. [Read: How to take good nudes – 36 tips for the sexiest naked selfies ever]

13. Be confident about your choices

If you send a message or picture, wait for their reply. Even if it’s taking them a while and you’re rethinking your choice, stick with it! Be confident in what you send and they will be able to tell. Confidence = awesome sexting.

14. Have fun with it!

Don’t be too serious about sexting. If you say something that might sound a little silly, just roll with it because, at the end of the day, you’re doing it to have fun and be closer with your partner. Don’t stress it too much! [Read: 23 sexy tips to dirty talk and say the sexiest words while sexting]

15. Never drunk sext

You will make a fool of yourself and it will not be pretty. Not only will you most likely spell almost everything wrong, but you’re also not likely to get your message across clearly, which could lead to misunderstandings and letdowns.

16. Don’t be a tease

While it’s fun to tease someone here and there throughout the day *we mean, that IS what sexting is * make sure you follow through with what you say.

It will annoy your partner when you talk the talk but then don’t walk the walk. But of course, that’s not to say you can’t tease them by making them wait a little longer for their reward. [Read: Happy sex life – What a good sex life should look like in real life]

How to sext safely

Now, we don’t want to add a downer to the conversation here, but you do need to know how to sext safely. Technology isn’t foolproof and if you’re sending sexy pictures to your partner, you need to be sure that they’re actually going to the person you intend them to, and that they’re not going to be accidentally lost.

Here are a few quick tips on how to sext safely and avoid any accidental mishaps. [Read: Online sexting – 10 biggest sexting rules you should never ignore]

  • Password protect your phone and don’t share it with anyone
  • Keep your photographs in a separate folder on your phone and if possible, password protect them too
  • Make sure that you’re sending the photograph to the right person before you hit ‘send’!
  • It’s best to back up your photographs and store them to The Cloud, rather than just keep them on your phone
  • Never share photographs with anyone else – it’s an obvious point but these photographs are private and for you and your partner only.

[Read: 20 really naughty ways to tease your man and leave him horny]

You may think you’re the master of sexting, but unless you’re following all these guidelines, you still have much to learn! Now get off the computer and hop on your phone and start putting these tips on how to sext the right way to the test!

Liked what you just read? Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, we’ll be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life.

Bella Pope LovePanky
Annabel Rodgers
Annabel is a lifestyle writer, cheese enthusiast (Wisconsin native over here) and fantasy adventure author-in-progress who enjoys all things love, dog,...