Bucket lists normally revolve around outdoor activities and lifelong ambitions, but a sexual bucket list – new things to try in bed – is an entirely different creature. Essentially, this is a list of sexual activities that you and your partner have never enjoyed together before, and which you intend to give a try—at least once, that is.
Of course, many sexual activities are quite out there, and you may never have considered them previously. That’s the point.
A sexual bucket list is there to encourage you to explore new sexual horizons and, if you don’t normally partake of these activities, introduce yourself to things you might not know you love. Sometimes, however, you might be quite surprised by how much you enjoy something and you may even end up incorporating it into your normal sexual routine.
So, not only do you get a whole new area of sex to enjoy, but there will be the inevitable consequence of trying these activities out: it brings you and your partner closer together, and creates a lot of fun memories, making it a win-win situation all around.
The following list suggests a number of activities that you can explore and experience together. Don’t be scared to add a few of your own!
If this is somehow something that you’ve never experienced, then it should be the first activity to try. Seriously, how have you managed to get this far without it? Oral sex is amazing, for all parties, and should be a usual part of any sexual relationship. Give it a try and never turn back. [Read: 12 sexy ways to make him go down on you without a push]
Not the kind that jams your arm behind your back and chops at your neck muscles with the force of a jackhammer, but the slow, sensual, and well-oiled kind. This is a subtle and easily-implemented addition to the list.
One of the most neglected parts of the body is the nipple. Although they are often ignored, they can be incredibly sensitive, to men as well as women. Try different levels of intensity to see what works, from light licking and squeezing, right through to biting and clamping. [Read: The top 10 erogenous zones that drive women wild in bed]
Some costumes and uniforms can be a real turn-on. Women often love firemen, policemen, and other authority figures, while guys often love French maids’ outfits, leather dominatrix costumes, or simple silky adornments. Discuss what works for you and give it a go.
Not everyone is comfortable with this, to begin with, but letting loose with the potty mouth can be a real turn-on for some people—especially during the height of passion. This is a really sexy thing to try in bed. [Read: How to talk dirty to a guy and sound really, really sexy]
Discussing fantasies mid-act, and talking about the filthiest things your imagination can muster during sex can really get the juices flowing. You don’t have to act upon them—make this clear to each other beforehand—but just airing them is enough to turn a normal lovemaking session into pure dynamite. [Read: How to fantasize about someone else without feeling guilty about it]
Perhaps one to go into gently to begin, but if you feel like upping the stakes, then try a firmer hand. Remember, though, that women have fuller posteriors than guys do, and feel the sting less than men. Also remember that guys have bigger, stronger, and rougher hands. Be as appropriate as the situation demands.
One to go into very carefully, and only if she is very willing and relaxed enough to accept the guy without any damage being done. In a loving, trusting relationship, it can be very enjoyable, but definitely low down on the list of acceptable bedroom activities—especially as far as women are concerned. [Read: The curious guys’ and girls’ guide to anal sex]
What’s good for the goose is good for the gander. This might seem shocking to many men, but the same pleasures are to be had by both genders if done properly. Some would argue that anal is even more pleasurable for guys because of the sensitivity of the prostate gland. Try fingers, tongues, vibrators, or even a strap-on if the mood takes you. The same caveat applies as with #8, of course.
If you’re both open-minded enough, try introducing a third person into the bedroom. Just make sure the rules are clear beforehand. For example, whether one of the couples is just to watch, or whether it’s open season for all three. [Read: Threesome tips: 20 things to know before you even consider one]
In a full-on swinging session, group sex is pretty much the ultimate sexual sensory experience—just make sure you’re both in full agreement first.
This is illegal in many countries, so check first, but revealing your sexual activities to others can be a real turn-on. You might have to get out of your bed and go somewhere else for this one. [Confessions: Sexy public flashing confessions from our readers]
Inner massage, as some have jokingly named it, tantra takes practice and patience but can have a hugely successful impact on the quality of your lovemaking.
Or to put it in simple terms, rubbing against each other. Skin to skin, and genital to genital, but resisting penetration, frottage can be a very horny way to get the ball rolling. [Read: Dry humping and the virgin’s guide to amazing orgasms]
Roleplay links in well with the costume thing and can be great fun. Policewoman and criminal, teacher and schoolgirl… you decide the scenario. Just make sure it leads to some heated in-between-the-sheets action.
A whole subject within itself, BDSM covers a large range of peculiarities. Maybe start off with some restraint and light spanking before hitting the whips, chains, and iron maidens! [Read: BDSM tricks and tips for curious first timers]
Takes a lot of discipline to stop yourselves from escalating it into full-blown sex, but combined with some of the above tips, such as fantasy talk or exhibitionism, it can be a real turn-on and definitely worth trying at least once.
Oof! Not for the faint-hearted, and one definitely isolated to the most trusting of relationships, but can be mind-blowing if done correctly. [Read: 11 easy tips to make vaginal fisting safer and sexier]
If one of you has always been a bit reticent about porn, get over it! Watching porn together is a great way to get the ball rolling and should be done by everyone at least once.
Pegging is a practice where a woman wears a strap-on and performs anal sex on a man. A lot of men like this because it stimulates their prostate gland, which is commonly known as the male G-spot. It’s full of nerve endings and with the right kind of stimulation, it can lead a man to have powerful, full-body orgasms. This has nothing to do with being straight, gay, or bisexual.
And there are so many to choose from these days, so how do you know the best ones to try? Don’t worry, we have your answers here. [Read: 15 Common types of sex toys all singles and couples should know]
A dildo is a non-vibrating sex toy that is generally shaped like a penis and similar in size to the real thing. The dildo can be used in place of the penis – or in addition to it at the same time. It can be double the pleasure.
Just as the name says, these are claps that you use on your nipples. It might not sound like it feels very good to have your nipples pinched hard, but some people find a lot of sexual pleasure from doing it.
A love egg is a type of egg or bullet-shaped vibrator that is used for sexual stimulation. They are also referred to sometimes as egg or bullet vibrators, depending on how they are shaped. Usually, they aren’t as strong as the larger, external vibrators such as a wand. But they are still popular because they are lower in price and very discreet. [Read: 7 Reasons why some women hate their vibrators]
A strap-on is a two-piece sex toy that includes a dildo, and it’s a great thing to try in bed. The dildo is held in place by a harness that attaches to the hips of the person wearing it. They are typically used to penetrate another person – either vaginally or anally. This is also called pegging when a woman uses a strap-on with a man.
Cock rings are rings that are worn at the base of the penis and sometimes the testicles. The purpose is usually to make erections harder, bigger, and last longer. They come in different types of materials. Some are flexible silicone and rubber, while others are leather and metal. Vibration and anal beads can also come with them which can be fun to use even without a penis involved.
This is a sex toy that can be enjoyed by anyone – male or female, gay or straight. The butt plug is an anal toy that essentially plugs your butt in a good way. They’re shaped like a teardrop and have a wide base that prevents them from getting sucked into your body. The anus is full of sensitive nerve endings that feel great when stimulated. [Read: Unbelievable sex – 20 sexual fetishes bordering on crazy]
If you’re in the mood for a little spanking, then you can try a sex paddle. One person can act as the dominant one, and the other one is the submissive *the one being paddled.* You can also role-play with this and pretend like you’re punishing your naughty partner.
Maybe one or both of you might enjoy being tied up? Some people naturally like to be dominated, so this is a great way to try something new in bed. You can use tape to make sure they can’t move their arms and legs, or you can simply handcuff them to the bed or something else.
If you’re curious about S&M practices but you don’t want to get all Fifty Shades of Grey yet, then you can get a beginner set for starters. This is a good way to dip your toes into the kinky sex scene. Most of them come with a blindfold, handcuffs, a vinyl whip, and more. You’ll have everything you need to start your kinky journey. [Read: BDSM – how to be a dominatrix in the bedroom]
You will have to find a good place to hang the swing. But once you do, you’ll be able to swing with sexual pleasure like a star. You can experiment with all different types of angles and sexual positions. Try upside-down penetration or anything else you can think of.
If you’re craving more foreplay in your sex life but you aren’t sure where to start, then you can try sex dice with your partner. Take turns rolling it until you have done every verb and noun combination. Each of you has to come up with a new role play with every roll of the dice.
There are sex toys for everyone and for every mood. Must be tried at least once, and probably many times more once you realize just how good they can be!
[Read: 50 more really naughty and kinky ideas to explore your relationship with steamy passion]
Now that you have a few suggestions at hand for new things to try in bed, why not give them a go? It might not all turn out to be your particular cup of tea, but you may find that you change your whole perspective on what sex should entail—as well as enjoy a new boost to the relationship you have with your lover.
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