It’s one thing to make it to your boyfriend’s living room. It’s another thing entirely to get up to his bedroom and spend the night there. Sleeping over at his place is a huge milestone in the relationship. He’s allowing you to enter his safe space and actually stay there for the night. It should be an awesome moment that you can relish, right? You should be happy that he’s letting you in, right?
Sleeping over can actually cause a lot of anxiety for many women. After all, you’re sleeping over at someone’s place where the rules can be a little bit different. What should you do? What should you bring? Would he be okay with your morning breath? What happens if his roomies spot you casually walking towards the toilet?
What you should know about sleeping over at his place
Here’s a guide for what you need to do to avoid any mishaps on the first night you’re sleeping over at a guy’s place.
#1 Tell a friend. Just to be on the safe side, it’s a good idea to tell someone you trust exactly where you’re planning to sleep over. Have the exact address and send it via text to a friend. This is especially important if you’re going home with a guy you don’t know that well yet *e.g. a guy you decided to come home with while you were partying*. You never know if you might suddenly need a friend to pick you when things go awry. [Read: 16 giveaway signs that it will be a one night stand]
#2 Bring cash. This is possibly the most important and convenient thing you need to have on you. Besides, who doesn’t carry a bit of cash with them when they go out? You need to have enough cash for a cab back home, in case your guy can’t drive you back to your place. Other things you might end up buying are toiletries, particularly if this is an unplanned sleepover.
#3 Bring toiletries, undies and maybe an extra shirt. You don’t need to bring an entire suitcase of stuff when you’re sleeping over! Seeing you lugging around a suitcase on your way to his place might make him think you instantly plan on moving in. Just bring the basics such as a toothbrush, makeup remover, underwear and a change of clothes, unless you’re fine with wearing your date attire from the night before when you’re headed home. You don’t want to look like a hot mess once you get back home, do you? [Read: Tips on what to wear when you jump into bed with your guy]
#4 Drop by the convenience store. This would only apply if you’re having an impromptu sleepover. 24 hour convenience stores are everywhere these days, so finding one should be a cinch. Once you’re there, grab the essentials like a toothbrush and maybe some condoms. Sure, the guy you’re with might have the essentials at his place. But it’s better to be ready than to find out what’s missing when you’re both at his place and too tired to go back out again.
#5 Wear light makeup or bring makeup remover. Raccoon eyes aren’t exactly the look you’re aiming for when you want to greet your guy a good morning. Of course, you want to look great, with the smokey eyes and twelve coats of mascara, but try your best to look like yourself when you’re wearing makeup, lest the guy you’re with would think that he took someone else home by mistake.
Also, makeup remover and some moisturizer are your best friends when you’re sleeping over. Get rid of the gunk on your face before you lay your head on one of his pillows. Trust us when we say that a guy would rather wake up to a fresh makeup-free face than a face that would give Freddy Kruger a run for his money. [Read: 10 ways to look sexy without even trying]
#6 Don’t act disgusted. There’s that twinge of anxiety that sets in once you enter his space. You never really know what you’ll find in there. So if you see that the house could be a little neater or a little cleaner, just do your best to not say anything that sounds like criticism. If your first instinct is to grab the Lysol and spray away, resist! You’ve been invited in, after all, the least you can do is act a little more grateful.
#7 Don’t get freaked out by his ex’s stuff. The thing with guys is that it may take them a while to get rid of the stuff they no longer need in the house. They may put it in a neat little pile in the corner of the room, but once they get used to it just lying there, they can forget about the whole thing. So if you see some feminine items that belonged to his ex, don’t berate him for it. Chances are he’s already mortified by the thought that you saw his ex’s stuff.
However, if you get the vibe that he might still be with his “ex” (e.g. her clothes are in the hamper, there are women’s toiletries in the bathroom, their pictures together are still up on the wall, etc.), now might be a good time to start asking him questions. If he’s no longer with her, her stuff shouldn’t be all over the place, right? [Read: 13 sneaky signs he’s still not over his ex]
#8 Be polite to the roomies. Yes, sleeping over at a shared space can be both inconvenient and uncomfortable. The space is theirs as much as it is his. Try to be pleasant, if not friendly. For starters, you’re all adults anyway. They probably already know what’s up when their roomie is bringing home a girl. They should leave you guys alone to do your thing once the initial pleasantries are made.
Also, keep in mind that only a wall separates you from his roomies. So keep the noise level to a minimum volume. Like we said, they already know what’s up. They don’t need audio proof of what you guys are up to.
#9 Keep in mind that he may not be as attractive when he wakes up. Sure, your guy may be absolutely perfect when you’re out and about. But his instinct to behave a certain way is still getting ready as he rubs the sleep off his eyes. So in order for you to not be caught unawares, remember that no one is perfect when they wake up.
He might have crusty eyes, messy hair, bad breath and a puddle of drool on his pillow. This can be endearing to some women, because he just looks so adorably vulnerable. If you don’t find that sort of thing cute, just be prepared to come face to face with it in the morning.
#10 Have an exit strategy. You know those people who always seem to outstay their welcome? Don’t be one of them. Even if your guy has nothing planned for the rest of the day, don’t linger around unless he specifically asks you to stay. It would be a lot more awkward if he makes up an excuse that you can see right through.
Don’t take it as a personal insult if he doesn’t want you to stay much longer. Some people just want to have some time to themselves. Besides, having you over is already a big step forward in your relationship, right? This could mean that your next date is all but set in stone! [Read: 8 tips for making your walk of shame less shameful]
Sleeping over doesn’t have to be a huge nerve-wracking ordeal. There are little things to do to make things run more smoothly. Just keep these tips in mind, go with the flow, and have a fun night together!
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