Why is sexual chemistry important in a relationship?
Love may hold a relationship together, but sexual chemistry keeps the attraction alive.
If you and your partner don’t share sexual chemistry, you’d find no difference in the way you treat your lover or your sibling.
After all, love without sexual attraction is just too innocent to be termed as a romance. And that’s why sexual chemistry makes all the difference in a relationship.
But at the same time, sexual chemistry isn’t something that can be faked or created. It has to come to life from deep inside when two people who are attracted to each other meet. If you don’t feel the sexual attraction towards someone, there’s really not much hope for a relationship. [Read: How to know if you’re in love or getting attracted to someone]
Even if you end up dating someone who doesn’t feel sexually excited to be with you, they may just end up leaving you for someone else or having an affair behind your back. So if you can’t feel the sexual chemistry when you’re dating someone, don’t get into a relationship. It’s just not worth the pain and effort.
Why can’t you feel the sexual chemistry?
There are many types of people in the world. And not everyone will be able to share the perfect sexual chemistry with each other. If you’re an enthusiastic and adventurous type of person, you may not enjoy a great sexual chemistry with someone who loves routine. After all, as much as sexual chemistry is about sex, it also has a lot to do with lifestyle choices and the way we present ourselves.
If you like someone and find yourself getting attracted to them, but at the same time, you don’t feel the sexual excitement deep inside, perhaps both of you are just not sexually compatible with each other. Don’t fret though. These things happen all the time. So if you ever find yourself having seconds thoughts about someone you like, chances are, both of you are lacking in the sexual chemistry department. [Read: A true story about chemistry and sparks in romance]
The two types of sexual chemistry
Sexual chemistry is important in two phases of interaction between two individuals, at first sight and in the long term.
When you meet someone and immediately feel sexually attracted to that person, and they feel the same towards you, then you’re experiencing the chemistry at first sight.
And if you’ve been in a relationship for over a year, the second form of sexual chemistry starts to kick in. During the first few months of the relationship with your new lover, the infatuation and the sexual chemistry combine to create an intense attraction towards each other. But as the months turn to years, the infatuation fades away and turns into a mature love.
And when that happens, sexual chemistry too starts to take a nose dive. Almost all relationships that hold past a year or more, enters this stage of mediocre sexual chemistry. But there are always ways to bring that back with a bang. [Read: 10 sexy ways to make married sex feel like a one night stand]
How to increase sexual chemistry in your relationship
If you feel like the sexual chemistry’s lacking in your love life, try to look for ways to constantly keep each other’s bodies and sexual sides exciting. And just use these 10 tips to bring sexual chemistry back into your romance again.
#1 Don’t cling to each other. Spend some time away from each other now and then. Spending too much time with each other will prevent either of you from missing each other. And when you don’t miss each other, you can’t crave for each other sexually, can you? [Read: How to love someone without smothering them]
#2 Be confident. People who exude confidence and charisma always seem more attractive than people who trudge down a street with a hunched back. Love yourself, feel good about who you are on the inside and outside, and you’ll become a lot more attractive overnight.
#3 Make your lover feel lucky. As relationships grow, we start to forget how lucky we are to have found such a wonderful catch in our partner. Look for ways to remind your partner just how awesome you are, especially when you’re out with other people. [Read: How to keep a guy interested in 30 super sexy ways]
#4 Be a tease now and then. If you get something easily, you’ll never understand its value. If your partner can get to have sex with you whenever they want, they’ll never truly appreciate you. And when that happens, the sexual chemistry is bound to go downhill. Tease your lover now and then while making out or while walking down a street, either by doing something sexual and funny in public or by playing hard to get.
#5 Be unpredictable. There’s nothing sexier than a lover who’s unpredictable. Surprise and shock your partner out of the blue, be it about singing at a karaoke night, getting drunk with ten tequila shots in a row, or by doing something adventurous or daring when they least expect it. When you flash a sexy and naughty side now and then, your man can’t help but get hard in the pants! [Read: How to make your boyfriend want you more than ever]
#6 Love your life. Positive people are happy people. And happy people love life. And people who love life always look for ways to keep it fun and exciting. Don’t let life push you down into the dumps. When you’re optimistic and smiling all the time, it makes you look and feel more sexy. [Read: Ways to stop thinking negative about yourself]
#7 Don’t make your life feel like a routine. A new relationship is exciting because there’s so much to know about each other. And all that changes when routine gets into the relationship. Routines are predictable and boring. If Sunday night is sex night all the time, can you really enjoy the sizzle of sexual chemistry? Sexual chemistry has to be unpredictable and exciting. Keep it that way and it’ll always stay on a high.
#8 Indulge in PDA. Public display of affection is a great way to bring the sexual chemistry back into love. After all, when you’re restricted from doing things to each other, it’ll make both of you feel like college kids all over again. If you’re not a public display kind of person, fret not. Dress up, and get to a club. Grind each other or just get naughty on the dark dance floor. It’ll still work wonders for your sexual chemistry. [Read: 10 public display of affection laws you need to follow]
#9 Look good in each other’s arms. Do you look as good as or even better than how you first looked when you met your partner? No? If you’ve put on a few pounds or have stopped dressing up for your partner, well, it’s time to turn things around. Sexual attraction has a lot to do with physical attraction. So if you’re not feeling the sexual chemistry in love, you’re playing your part in the blame game too. [Read: How to look better naked using 15 real life tips]
#10 Awe your partner. Never stop awing your partner, in some way or the other. When your partner can’t help but drop their jaws when they look at you, you’ll definitely bring the sexual chemistry back into your lives.
A big tip to remember about chemistry
Don’t try to force sexual chemistry into a relationship. It doesn’t work that way. Sexual chemistry has to come naturally to both of you. If you push someone into a passionate session of lovemaking or a bout of PDA, you may end up angering them instead of making them feel the connection. Show off your best side and hope for the best. [Read: 9 relationship stages all couples go through]
If you’re in a new relationship, make your date awe you and you may just be able to attract them sexually. And if you’re in a seasoned relationship and find the sexual chemistry dwindling, use these 10 tips and remember to always keep things fresh and exciting. [Read: Seven sexiest types of sex you can ever have]
Sexual chemistry isn’t something you can control. But use these 10 tips on how to create sexual chemistry and make it stay, and you may just be able to bring the electricity back into your love life.
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A hippie at heart who loves exploring the world, Jana Snow always finds herself 15 minutes earlier than everyone else. And when she isn’t waiting for anyone, ...