Getting with someone new is never easy. You have to put yourself out there, show them you care, and still risk rejection. For that reason, using the right kind of subtle flirting moves is the best way to get your affection across without seeming desperate or clingy.
Plus, when you’re subtler about it, you make them wonder what you’re really after and that’ll intrigue them even more. But being subtle about the way you flirt isn’t always easy unless you know just what moves to do.
Over-the-top flirting is often a huge turn-off
It really has adverse effects. The more obvious you are, the more the other person is going to be put off. It’s one thing to be brazen, it’s another to act desperate. You can easily go up and tell someone you find them really attractive, but then you can grab them and try to have your way with them.
Take things a tad bit slower and let them wonder if you’re actually hitting on them. It shouldn’t ever be made super obvious – not if you want to hook them, at least.
And the best part of subtle flirting is that it’s much easier. You don’t have to put forth nearly as much effort in order to get someone to like you even more. It’s a no-brainer, really. [Read: How to meet someone without appearing desperate]
Subtle flirting moves for women
Men and women have different ways of picking up on clues. For that reason, certain moves won’t work for both. These are the best subtle flirting techniques that’ll make a guy notice you and want to come in closer.
#1 Expose your neck. Scientifically speaking, men get aroused and pay more attention to women whose necks and décolletage are showing. It’s part of their instincts and by pushing your hair to one side, it can help them notice you and pay more attention to your flirting.
#2 Tilt your head when talking to them. This is another thing that makes men pay more attention and notice you a bit more. While talking, tilt your head to the side. This signifies that you’re interested in what they have to say and will send a usually subconscious message to their brain that says as much.
And since people always like those who pay attention more than others, they’ll find that they’re drawn to you.
#3 Smile more. Smiling is a universal symbol. It makes you look more relaxed and upbeat. The more you smile around someone when flirting, the more they’ll feel at ease in your company. This helps them associate you with a feel-good vibe and make them like you more. [Read: 6 baby steps to smile more and change your life]
#4 Talk lower. The lower a woman’s voice, the more a man finds her attractive, according to science. High-pitched, squeaky voices tend to be irritating and can be off-putting. Plus, when you talk lower, he’ll have to lean in closer to hear and that proximity will only do good for you.
#5 Lean into them. It’s all about getting closer. When you can get close and are comfortable, it creates a bond. Even without noticing, he’ll start to feel better about being around you. So lean in to talk and see how close you can really get. It’s subtle, but it works.
#6 Bite your bottom lip. This is a pretty standard flirting move that most men pick up on relatively quickly. But the thing is, it still works really well and it simply enough for you to do without too much effort. [Read: The scientific explanations behind why lip biting drives a man crazy]
#7 Look up at them. Science plays a huge part in flirting. The way men perceive women can activate certain parts of their brain that get them to notice and like women more. Tilting your head down and looking up at a man is one of those things.
When you peer up at him, it not only makes him feel more masculine but it also gives you a younger, more feminine appearance, which plays to a man’s DNA in just the right way. [Read: The science behind flirting and how it really works]
#8 Laugh at what they say. Guys want to be funny. That’s something most people pick up on and if you laugh at their jokes, they’ll automatically feel more drawn to you. This is largely because you’ll make him feel good about himself. So even if something isn’t ridiculously funny, laugh anyway. [Read: How to make a guy fall for you with the smallest amount of effort]
Subtle flirting moves for men
You’re up, men. Subtle flirting is generally easier for women simply because girls can pick up on flirting moves much easier than most men. For that reason, you have to be even more careful not to go overboard. Here are some moves that’ll get her to like you more.
#1 Lean down to talk. It’s about closing the gap and getting closer. Women are a bit more off put by guys who try too hard to get touchy-feely but leaning down to talk is a fantastic way to get closer while making sure she still feels comfortable. [Read: How to flirt with women and seduce her the friendly way]
#2 Turn your body toward them. Make her your center of attention. Any way you can make a girl feel special and unique to you is a perfect way to subtly flirt. This also makes her realize that you actually want to talk to her and aren’t just being nice.
#3 Smile. Women tend to feel a little uneasy around new men, for obvious, yet unfortunate, reasons. Smiling helps reduce those feelings and can make her feel a lot more comfortable around you. Plus, it makes you more attractive.
#4 Make eye contact. Don’t stare at her chest. Make eye contact and let her know you respect her enough to do so. This is a pretty powerful, but subtle flirting move that’s not only appreciated, but can often tell you just what she’s feeling. The more she holds your eye contact, the better.
#5 Talk quieter. Don’t do this to the extent that she has to say, “What?” every five seconds but just enough that it makes her lean in closer to hear. It makes you appear softer and gentler, which is something many women want when meeting a guy for the first time. [Read: 35 dirty things to say to a girl to leave her wet with desire]
#6 Compliment something other than her looks. Women who are beautiful obviously like to hear it, but that means they hear it often. Talk to her a little bit and compliment something
#7 Be a tease. This isn’t necessarily in a sexual way. Find something cute and a little quirky about her and tease her for it. Make her have to defend herself. Girls know that a guy who teases her likes her and it’s a fun way to break the ice and ease any tension in the air.
[Read: 30 subtle, obvious, and really sexy flirting tips]
Subtle flirting is more effective simply because they’ll feel drawn to you without knowing why. That’ll make them think they truly do like you and it’ll open the door for you to make your moves.
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