In today’s world, it’s hard to tell if a person is actually into you in a way that makes them want to take you out on a fancy date or if they’re just being friendly. Too many people try to hide their feelings because they’re unsure of yours, and the cycle just keeps going.
The good thing is that people can usually only hide so much about their true feelings and intentions. I’ve had a male friend for YEARS who was always just a friend to me. Then one day, I started noticing little things that made me question how he really felt.
Hiding their big secret
For a while, I just dismissed these little signs, thinking that maybe he was being weird for a while. But then he made a move. Needless to say, I was surprised, but not that much. I knew something was up and figured it out before he said anything. [Read: 25 surefire signs that clearly reveal if a guy likes you]
Do you have someone like that in your life, too? Are you just sitting there in complete confusion because you can’t tell if they’re just friendly or if they really feel something more? These 28 signs might shed some light on their behavior and unearth their secret feelings for you.
How to find out if someone like-likes you or just likes you
#1 They compliment you often. Not in an outright, obvious way. They’re trying to hide their feelings, after all. I’m saying subtle things that almost *keyword, ALMOST* go unnoticed by you. A phrase like “cool sweatshirt” is subtle enough not to seem like it means much, but it does.
#2 They notice the little things. Not many people notice if you just get a trim, especially if you’re a girl, but if they notice enough to comment on it, they could having some feelings outside of just friendship.
#3 They often start the conversation. If they’re constantly the one to start a conversation with you, it’s because they always want to talk to you—a sign that they have a big crush on you. [Read: 15 body language cues a girl gives away if she likes a guy]
#4 They initiate hanging out. When they’re the ones always asking to go grab coffee, hang out, or watch a movie, they might be hiding their true feelings of wanting to see you all the time.
#5 You catch them looking at you at strange times. Have you ever looked over at them in a group setting and noticed that their eyes were already on you? That’s because they were admiring your hotness—almost guaranteed. Unless you were doing something weird, of course…
#6 They never ask you about your significant other, if you have one. If you’re dating someone else and are just friends with them, they’re never going to ask how things are going. It’s too painful for them to talk about your being with someone else.
#7 They change the subject when you talk about someone you like. If that person isn’t them, they’re going to change the subject so they don’t have to listen to it. That’s a huge indicator that they might have feelings for you. [Read: 10 super-subtle gestures that reveal if someone’s into you]
#8 They ask about your family. People who only want to be friends with you aren’t going to go out of their way to ask about how your family is doing unless they know something is wrong. If they’re just “checking up” on them, they probably like you and want to show an interest in the things that matter to you.
#9 They ask deep questions. Most “just friend” types aren’t going to ask, in detail, about your biggest dreams, aspirations, and desires. If they’re asking personal, deep questions, then they might have a huge crush on you.
#10 They make jokes about dating you. This is one that one of my good guy friends who ended up liking me always did. He would casually joke about “if you were my girlfriend…” all the time. Truth be told, he really wished that. [Read: 15 easy ways to friend zone a guy without leading him on]
#11 You hear that they’ve been talking about you to other mutual friends. When you have other friends coming up to you saying things like “oh yeah, so and so told me you did that,” then they definitely like you. They can’t seem to stop talking about you, even when you’re not there.
#12 They’re more “hands-on” with you. Not in a weird, perverted way. But they are closer to you and find excuses to make physical contact whenever they can. Little shoulder touches or a hand on your back is all it takes to show that they’ve got a crush on you. [Read: 20 types of touches and what each touch means]
#13 You two always wind up alone together. Somehow, no matter what the plans are or where you’re going, the two of you always end up alone together at some point. This is planned on their part and it’s because they want it that way.
#14 They pay extra attention when you’re talking while in a group setting. When there’s a bunch of people around, it’s hard to focus on one person when you’re all friends. But if they like you more than that, they’ll be the one listening and hanging on your every word.
#15 They smile more around you. You know how it is. Being around your crush just makes you ridiculously happy, and you seem to always have a grin on your face. If that’s them, they might be crushing on you.
#16 They never talk about their love interests. You may bring up your crushes sometimes, but if they never, ever mention anyone they like, chances are that’s because it’s you.
#17 When in groups, they usually stick by your side. When someone likes you and you’re in a big group, they’re going to spend as much of their time as they can right next to you.
#18 They discuss the future with you. No, not just where you’ll be that weekend, but where you’ll be five years from now. They’re gauging if your future goals are similar or not because they want to determine if there’s a chance it could work between the two of you.
#19 They find a reason to dislike everyone you date. There’s nothing more frustrating than a friend who seems to hate everyone you date. But the truth might just be that they’re jealous. [Read: 15 ways to tell for sure if someone likes you without asking them]
#20 They confide in you more than anyone else. Do you know secrets about them that even their closest friend doesn’t? Confiding in someone and putting their trust in them is a huge sign they’ve got a crush!
#21 They remember important/weird stuff about you. Not just your birthday or the date of a big event in your life, but they remember that you like your toast burnt or that you can’t stand the sound of twigs breaking. If they remember the weird stuff, they like you.
#22 Any form of unintended flirting. When someone has a crush on you, they’re going to accidentally flirt with you. It’s a natural human reaction. So if they’re flirting and you realize it’s not on purpose, it could be a sign they want to be more than friends.
#23 They do their best to look nice around you. If you two are just hanging out at their house, not doing anything else and yet they’ve dressed pretty nice and look well-polished, it’s because they’re trying to impress you.
#24 People you’ve never met know about you because of them. I once went to my guy friend’s house, and his mom greeted me with a hug and by name, but I had never met her before. If their family and friends know about you before you’ve even met, they like you. For sure. [Read: 17 clear signs you should be dating your best friend already!]
#25 They show different sides of themselves. If you’ve seen them be goofy, happy, funny, upset, devastated, and everything in between, they might like you. They’re trying to show you their different sides and hoping that you’ll do the same.
#26 They attempt to make you jealous. If you notice they’re bringing up hot people they like or that they just seem like they’re trying to make you jealous in general, it’s because they want to know if you care about them enough to get jealous.
#27 They make a move. An arm around your shoulder, an all-too-intimate hug, or touching your face in any way can be a huge sign that they have a big crush on you. If you’re just friends with someone, you don’t make moves like that.
#28 They tell you. Some people are brutally honest. They’ll just straight out tell you they have feelings for you and want to take things a step further. At that point, it’s up to you to decide where you want to go from there.
[Read: The tricky pros and cons of dating a friend you need to consider]
Deciphering someone’s feelings for you isn’t always easy, especially when they’re trying to hide it. Take it from someone who’s been there, these hush-hush signs will prove that they have a big crush on you!
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