Women are mysterious creatures. Like a mine field, sometimes you feel as if you are fumbling around, bouncing off one subject to another, when talking with them. There is nothing more awkward than not having something to talk about.
The perfect conversation – Things to talk about with a girl
These 43 questions are the best conversation starters to keep the lull from happening and to learn more about her. If you are having a hard time finding common ground, these are some questions to help you get through a rough, silent patch.
Try these lines, get the conversation back on track and find out a little more of what makes her tick.
#1 Are you a reality TV fan or more of a sitcom lover? Reality TV viewers are inherently different from sitcom people. Discussing whether you would rather see people in their ugly moments or discuss the funny and ugly in human situations is a good way to find out who they are.
#2 Do you like going to see bands? If you want to set up the next date or make sure you have the right music the next time they come over, this is a good question to ask. Some of us are concert goers while others are not! [Read: 20 fun and unconventional date ideas you can try]
#3 What is your favorite hangout? Not only will you find something to talk about, but you may also find you have things in common. We often go to specific hangouts because they reflect our personality styles and the things we like to do.
By getting her to talk about her hangouts, you can learn a little about her, and if by some chance, you don’t get her number and want to see her again at least you will know where to look.
#4 What was your favorite movie? Ask her what her favorite movie was, not only when she was little but recently as well. You can get a good idea of what she was like growing up by knowing if she liked something like Dumb and Dumber versus Cinderella. Sometimes, the movies we used to like are the ones that reveal a whole lot more about our personalities. [Read: 40 questions to ask your crush to subtly flirt with them]
#5 Do you have brothers or sisters? To most women, family is important. If you want to get her talking about those who mean the most to her, just ask. Make sure you pay attention because if she is going to open her heart up about her family and let you know about them, she will expect you care enough to remember the next time, if you should meet again.
#6 Do you get along with them? Family is an important part of your life and how you get along with them says a lot about how you are capable of bonding with people. Asking her about how she gets along with those who are important to her will likely bring up a lot to talk about. [Read: 20 questions to ask a girl that’ll reveal your sensitive side to her]
#7 Where do you see yourself in five years? It is always difficult to see where you will be in the future. Some of us are focused and know exactly where we want to be, while some of us are taking our time making our way.
If she knows who she is and what she wants, she will have no problem telling you what her goals are. It will likely give you an idea how she feels about starting a family and whether she is looking for a long-term mate or a quick fling thing. [Read: 12 life questions to help you visualize your future]
#8 What was your favorite subject in school? Was she a math geek or a creative writer? Whatever her favorite subject was is likely what she is good at now. Not only will it get her to open up about her childhood school memories, but it will also tell you whether she is more of a creative, fun-loving woman or an analytical, by-the-book kind.
#9 What did you want to be when you grew up? We all had dreams when we were little. Did she live up to hers or switch gears? If she tells you she is what she wanted to be, then you know you have a woman who knows what she wants and doesn’t change course. If she did change what she wanted to be, then it can lead into a whole new conversation about what the catalyst for change was.
#10 What is your best memory? Was her favorite memory about something she earned, or something fun she did with her family? Asking her about memories will tell you what types of things are important enough to stay in her memory and make a lasting impression. Is it all about the competition or the fun of getting there?
#11 If you could be any age, what age would it be and why? Is she comfortable with where she is now, or does she long for the days of no responsibility? There are seasons none of us would want to repeat, and then there are those times we wish we could stay in forever. [Confession: A guy’s first kiss story – Memories of my embarrassing first kiss]
#12 Are you a beach or a pool person? Beach people are very different from pool people. If she isn’t someone who likes to get sand in her stuff, she is more meticulous. A pool person is someone who doesn’t like to get messy and wants to get knee deep into anything tactile.
#13 Are you more comfortable in sandals or high heels? Does she wear high heels because she has to at work but prefers to wear flip flops when possible? This type of conversation starter can lead to a whole string of her telling you what she shows to the world, and what she thinks inside her mind. They may be two different things completely.
#14 Do you like to get dressed up? Most girls like to get dressed up once in a while, while others hate to get all gussied up. This conversation-starter can tell you not only what she likes to do on the weekends, but you may get some funny stories about any costume malfunctions she may have had. [Read: On the flip side, 12 awkward questions girls really wish they could ask guys]
#15 What is your boss like? Does she like to go with the flow or be her own boss? If you ask her about what her boss is like and how well she gets along with them, you find out about whether she is a rebel without a cause, or more of a “roll with it” type of girl.
#16 What is your dream car? Does she dream about a car with air conditioning, or one that can go 170 mph? Not only will this conversation starter tell you about where she is at now, it will let you know what her financial aspirations are for the future and whether money and luxury mean anything to her. [Read: Are you unwittingly holding your partner back from success?]
#17 Would you rather spend your vacation seeing a city or sitting on a beach? Is she adventurous, or would she rather saddle up to a chair and a beach?
#18 What is a deal breaker when it comes to dating someone? How seriously does she take things? Could she date a smoker or a garbage man? Those are things that define her future goals.
#19 Do you consider yourself competitive? Are you going to be battling with her over who earns more money, who makes the decisions, or is she going to spend all her time training for something? How much does she need to win?
#20 Why did you choose your career? What drives her: money or compassion?
#21 Do you want children and if so how many? An excellent conversation starter to figure out if you are both on the same page. [Read: 19 things you must do as a couple before having a baby]
#22 Do you think that you have to announce exclusivity or is it just something that is assumed? If she sees you out with another woman, is she going to freak out? Do you need to ask her not to go out with anyone if you start something a little more than a couple of dates? How formal do the definitions need to be?
#23 Would you rather see a horror film or a comedy movie? Does she want to laugh or be scared out of her wits?
#24 Do you like chick flicks and if so why/why not? This conversation starter will tell you how you will likely spend your movie-going time if you choose to start something lasting.
#25 Do you think people can change? How forgiving is she? Does she believe in forgiving people because they can change or forgiving people and then moving on because they won’t? This question will tell you how rigid she is in her beliefs. [Read: 30 deep questions you need answers to before you fall for someone]
#26 What qualities are important to you in friendship? Does she stay with her friends to party or because they possess something of value to her life?
#27 Why is your best friend your best friend? What qualities does she think are important enough to make someone her bestie?
#28 Do you think marriage is forever? This will likely spin off into whether her parents are married still, what type of family she grew up in and whether she has a realistic idea about what saying “I do” means. Is she someone who is all about the fairy tale, or someone who will stick through thick and thin because she made a commitment for better or worse? [Read: 10 reasons passionate love can be the strongest of all]
#29 What is more important to you: family or career? Is she traditional or corporate ladder?
#30 When is it okay not to tell the truth? Are white lies good or do they just mean you aren’t honest. This will tell you how she will perceive any lie you tell her and the trust she will have. [Read: 8 sneakily accurate ways to tell if your girl is lying]
#31 Do you judge people easily, or are you a good judge of character? This conversation starter will likely tell you whether she has been hurt in the past by trusting the wrong people and how likely she is to trust in the future.
#32 Do you tell people your real age and do you think you always will? Is she afraid to grow old? How comfortable is she with what is inside of her, instead of the looks she displays to the world?
#33 Who is your favorite actor? Does she like the hot guy, the action adventurer, or the funny man on screen?
#34 Are you more of a homebody or an adventurer? Are you going to spend time climbing mountains or watching television? This conversation starter will tell you if you are two are compatible.
#35 Do you think opposites attract? Does she want someone to do and think like she does, or someone to challenge her by being different? [Read: Do opposites attract or do they push each other away]
#35 Do you like to cook? Who is going to be doing the cooking? Women who like cooking have a tendency to be more *traditional*. [Read: Misconceptions about dating a feminist all guys must know]
#36 Did you come from a traditional family? What were her role models like?
#37 What type of teenager were you? Rebel or good girl? That will likely tell you who she is and where she is going… even if it was just a phase, did she get it out of her system?
#38 Is it important for people to know about you? What are the qualities she thinks are important to make you a good and decent person?
#39 What is it that I could do to really piss you off? This is a good question to keep yourself out of trouble for the future and will let you know if there is a long list of don’ts, or if she is pretty forgiving.
#40 Are you straight forward or more passive aggressive? Does fine mean fine?
#41 Are you more of a yeller or quiet arguer? What type of fights are you going to have – the knock down drag ‘em out or the quiet “I’m upset with you because…”? [Read: Fighting in a relationship – How to do it right]
#42 Did you check me out on Facebook before we went out? Is she someone who is going to pry into your social life before you even decide to be something?
#43 What do you think of selfies? Is she into herself and think others care more about her than they actually do?
Conversation lulls are always uncomfortable. If you are going to fill your time with someone talking, you may as well learn all you can about them.
[Read: How to keep a conversation going with the opposite sex]
These conversation starters and things to talk about with a girl will not only engage you in deeper and more meaningful conversation; they will tell you whether you want to see her again or perhaps even if she may be “The One.”
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A writer isn’t born, but created out of experiences. No lack of subject matter, my life reads more like fiction than anything that could have been imagined...
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