Sexual tension is what you see between TV characters in a will-they-won’t-they scenario. But do you really know the signs of sexual tension to recognize it when you feel it? Do you know what causes it, or how to build it?
Think about those moments in old movies when a damsel in distress trips or faints and a handsome man catches her. When their eyes meet and you wonder if they’ll kiss or not, that is sexual tension.
This can happen between strangers, friends, or even lovers.
You could be living with someone for years and still have sexual tension. Maybe you went out with a group of friends and your partner. During the night something happened, and you’re both feeling physical desire for each other but it is postponed by being in public.
That is sexual tension too. It is something of a phenomenon that can occur between any two people. It can be mutual and sometimes singular. A teenager who has a major crush on a member of their favorite band may feel sexual tension just hearing them sing, but the celebrity isn’t even aware of it.
This sexual tension can be weak or so intense others can feel it. It can make you nervous, excited, or even agitated in some cases.
All in all, it is a sexual desire that for some reason isn’t being met in that moment. But, what causes it and how do you know the signs of sexual tension?
Check out how to know if someone is thinking of you sexually to learn the signs you’re making someone horny just by your mere presence!
Sexual tension can be caused by a lot of things. Anything from romance, to physical attraction, and sometimes hate, can lead to sexual desire.
I’m sure you’ve felt it yourself. When you sit next to your work crush or even sit next to an attractive stranger on a train and your hands brush against each other or you make eye contact. As your heart rate rises, and you begin to sweat, a part of you desperately wants to kiss them. [Read: Sexual tension at work – The office signs and ways to break it]
This is caused by unfulfilled desire and even a level of risk. Your body is filled with hormones that are running wild in those moments. Your mind is battling between fulfilling a desire in the moment and making a rational decision.
The riskier it would be to make a move in that moment, the more intense this internal battle is.
For instance, making a move on someone you know is interested in you might not cause too much sexual tension. But, deciding whether or not to make a move after a first date could cause more sexual tension because there is an element of unknown.
This would be even higher if you had feelings for someone in a committed relationship or a long-time friend whose feelings you’re unsure of.
Sexual tension isn’t desire or lust because the tension is there. There is something stopping anything actually sexual to happen and that is the tension. [Read: What does sexual tension feel like? How to know exactly]
And to be honest, no matter how intense that sexual tension is or how hard it is to fight, it is there for a reason.
If sexual tension didn’t exist, we would all make a lot of stupid moves. You can thank sexual tension for those moments when you didn’t just go for it with your married friend.
And, think about how amazing the aftermath of sexual tension is when you finally do make a move. Whether you’ve been talking to someone online for months and now finally met, or have been flirting with a coworker and finally admitted your feelings, that moment of release is so much more intense when the sexual tension has been building.
As I said earlier, sexual tension can also build when you’re in a relationship. Maybe you’ve been staying at your parents’ house for the holidays and can finally jump each other’s bones when you get home. That relief is much stronger than just rolling over in bed and making it happen.
Essentially, what causes sexual tension is the prevention or prolonging of sexual desire by any means.
Read more about what causes sexual tension and how it builds and feels like to know more.
So, now you know what sexual desire is and what leads to it. But what are the signs of sexual tension? How do you know when you’re in the throes of sexual desire or if someone else is?
You can feel a lot of these things for yourself and as a third-party, you can even observe it quite easily.
So, what are the signs of sexual tension?
Being nervous around someone is a telltale sign there is an attraction. And when there is sexual tension, that is only increased. Not knowing what would happen if you made a move makes you even more nervous.
You may stumble over your words when talking to them or even talking about them. You may fidget before seeing them or even feel butterflies in your stomach. [Read: The lusty signs of strong physical attraction and how it feels]
Eye contact between two people sharing sexual tension can be constant or not. If you find yourself sharing longing glancing, that is a sign of sexual attraction and also that things may be mutual. But sexual tension can also be seen in quick glances.
If you catch someone looking at you because you’re looking at them, this shows neither of you can help but look at each other.
Sure, you may smile at tons of people but the smile when it comes to someone you share sexual tension with is different. This is a smile that lasts even after they walk away. This is the smile you have when they text you and a friend asks what you’re smiling about. [Read: How to create sexual tension with a guy so he’ll make a move on you]
Blushing is a sign of nervousness. If you blush around them, when they compliment you, or even when your hand accidentally touches theirs, there is a reason.
Focusing on this person even when there is work to be done, or there are other people around, shows an interest. This laser focus may not be purposeful, but you can’t help it. You focus on them with your sight and your mind.
It is hard to break your focus from them when they’re around.
A big part of the signs of sexual tension in the waiting. The longer you wait, the stronger the sexual tension builds to be. When this is prominent, you wait for them to say something. When you’re parting ways, you take an extra moment to get another look or to see if something might happen. [Read: How to tell if a guy is turned on around you – 22 signs he’s horny AF]
Sexual tension increases your awareness of your body. You acknowledge little touches you may ignore in most cases. If you hand this person a coffee and brush against their fingers, it feels much more intense than it would with anyone else.
You are also more aware of your movements. You are more likely to touch your face, your hair, and accentuate your assets even without realizing it.
There is a sweet awkwardness when sexual tension is at play. It almost mimics the feeling of sharing a flirtation in high school before you know how to handle your hormones.
The awkwardness can come across in a weird giggle, a snort, even a nervous tick like playing with your hair.
This isn’t the most common in real life but is what you tend to see in movies and TV. A couple that argues or fights a lot uses that as a way to avoid their sexual tension. More commonly, it could be seen as teasing.
People may make fun of each other, tease, or even argue to fight back at their desire when they can’t or don’t want to give into it. [Read: What do guys think of their female friends? 15 very real secrets revealed]
This may seem obvious but sexual tension is partly intense desire. You may not drool over this person, but you have a feeling that is pretty darn close to it. You want to kiss them, be alone with them, and just let things happen.
When other people can see the attraction you two share, it is a major sign of sexual tension between you both. If someone thinks you’re together or asks when you’re going to finally get together, it means the sexual tension is so obvious even third parties can spot it.
You know that relaxation you feel when talking to a good friend or family member, that never happens when you’re around this person you share sexual tension with. You’ll always feel like you’re on your toes.
You never know if something might happen between you so you’re on guard. [Read: Sexual flirting – How to step up from regular flirting and make it naughty]
Sweating is a common sign of being nervous, but it happens a lot when you’re around someone that turns you on. And when you can’t do anything about those feelings, the body temperature rises and makes you sweat. You may also be more likely to touch your forehead or the back of your neck around them or even fan yourself because you feel warm.
Everything from your bodies facing each other to fully mirroring each other’s movement shows sexual tension. When you point your feet and the center of your bodies towards each other, it shows a physical desire.
Sometimes you can actually feel the inner battle of sexual tension. Your body desires this person but your rational mind is fighting those urges. Your hand may touch theirs but your brain shuts that down. That internal struggle can be hidden but you may feel it. [Read: Mutual sexual tension – How to know for sure they feel what you’re feeling too]
You are just drawn to each other. Maybe you run into each other at random places, but most often when in groups, you are pulled together. You tend to sit near one another, and you seek them out without even realizing it.
A major sign of sexual tension is a constant feeling of something being unsaid. Every time you say goodbye or talk, you feel like there is something being held back by them, you, or both.
I felt this when I knew I was in love with my boyfriend but hadn’t told him yet. Every time we were together I knew I wanted to say it and it drove me crazy.
Whether it is an actual dream or a daydream, your subconscious is crying out for this person. If you can’t be with them in real life, your mind is showing you what that subconscious part wants. You may daydream about being with them or have a full-blown sex dream. [Read: What does it mean when you dream about your crush – The 7 possible explanations]
You know that indescribable spark you look for when dating? Well, you share that with this person. They may not be someone you want to date or have a relationship with, but you have that passionate chemistry that you can’t exactly describe.
You deny it. A lot of the time, sexual tension is shared between people you can’t or don’t want to admit feelings towards. Whether it’s because they’re coworkers, in other relationships, or they don’t actually like each other, sexual tension is often denied by the people experiencing it.
Do you recognize these signs of sexual tension? If you’re seeing more than a few of these signs, you’re definitely feeling it! If so, what are you going to do about it now?
Check out these two articles on how to make a girl horny just by sitting next to her or if you’re a girl, use this guide on how to make a guy horny while hanging out with him casually to build up the sexual tension even more, and bring that fantasy to reality ASAP!
Liked what you just read? Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, we’ll be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life.
LOVEPANKY IN YOUR INBOX
Get the very best of LovePanky straight to your inbox!