Wait, an accidental text on purpose, what’s that, you say?! For starters, be honest, have you ever attempted to get someone’s attention by using an “oops, sorry, that text wasn’t meant for you” kind of tactic?
Come on, own up, we’ve all done it!
This is known as the ‘accidental text on purpose’ and it allows you to make contact with someone, perhaps as a nudge, whilst having the pretext of actually not meaning to do so. You can maintain your cover of nonchalance but still receive the desired effect.
It’s genius when you think about it!
[Read: What to do when you accidentally send a text to the wrong person?]
You might have done this yourself by accident, or you might have been quite obvious about it and tried to pretend it was an accident, but the accidental text on purpose looks a little like this, for example:
You’ve met someone and exchanged numbers. You might have even sent a few messages back and forth over the space of a few days, but then suddenly everything goes a little quiet.
You were the last one to send a message, so you’re not keen on sending another and appearing clingy by double texting, and of course, because you don’t want to look desperate. The silence goes on.
What do you do?
You send a ‘nudge.’ This could be a text which has nothing to do with the original conversation, to look completely accidental, and the recipient will receive it and then wonder what it’s for.
The hope is that they’re so overcome with curiosity as to what it means, because it’s so out of context, that they send you a message in return.
Boom! Conversation re-started.
If your conversation carries on, consider your texting strategy a success. However, there is the risk that they could simply ask what you mean and then leave it alone. In that case, don’t try this strategy again, because you really are erring on the side of desperation, and nobody like that!
[Read: How to master the subtle art of getting someone to call or text you back]
If someone isn’t careful, then they might accidentally send an embarrassing message to the wrong person. 28% of people have done this and admit to doing it every few months. Another 47% only did it once or twice a year. Therefore, it’s pretty common.
So, if you want to send an accidental text on purpose, then it’s not out of the realm of possibilities that it could have been a real “accident.” In other words, you might have a good chance of fooling the other person.
When you sent a fake accidental text, they are most likely to have a good outcome when the trust is high between you and the person you sent it to. Plus, they need to feel like you aren’t trying to make them do anything they don’t want to do.
When this happens, the “accidental” part is no big deal, because they trust you anyway. You could have just as easily sent them a direct, non-accidental text.
However, if you don’t know the person that well or if there is some animosity between the two of you, then it could have an outcome you don’t want.
If you want to send the best accidental text on purpose without it looking blatantly obvious what you’re attempting to do, the key is in the wording and the timing. [Read: When a girl doesn’t text back – 39 reasons and what to do next]
Firstly, make sure whatever you send isn’t related to the conversation you were having. If so, it looks like a continuation and you’re desperately trying to restart the chat. That’s what you’re doing, of course, but you don’t want them to know that!
Instead, go for something random, but don’t opt for anything flirty. If you do this, they might assume you’re chatting to several people on the go and as a result, they might think you’re a little too flighty for their tastes.
Of course, they could fly into a jealous rage and hit you up constantly, but do you really want to have to make a potential partner super-jealous in order to get any attention?
Of course not! [Read: How to not be a boring texter and keep your crush really interested]
Instead, stick to something quirky yet un-obvious.
Something like “do you really think so?”, or “I can’t believe they did that”, or “what are the chances?!” or “of course, I WILL do that tomorrow, I promise!” That basically looks like you’ve continued a conversation with someone else, but it’s totally innocent, without flirtatious connotations or any overtones of anything dodgy going on.
The wording also has to be enough to make them curious. Avoid anything like “I’m good thanks, how are you”, because that’s the most boring conversation around.
It needs to look like you’re in the middle of something funny or interesting and not a general conversation you would have with your sister!
Now we have to think about timing. Avoid sending it late at night. If you do this, they’re going to assume it’s some kind of booty call-esque chat which they’re going to see straight through. Having conversations with other people late at night also doesn’t look great if you’re attempting to snag this person as your potential other half! [Read: Dry texting – The real meaning behind someone’s one-word responses]
The best time to send your accidental text on purpose is at some point during the day or early in the evening. Avoid first thing in the morning because they’re likely to forget that you’ve texted them and therefore not reply simply because it’s slipped their mind.
Lunch time is a good option, as this is when people are on their phones whilst eating their lunch. Early evening is also good because people tend to be relaxing and therefore more likely to chat.
Do not try and send an accidental text on purpose if you have already sent two unanswered texts beforehand. Basically, that’s a big red flag that is screaming “leave me alone!”
This person isn’t interested. It’s tough, but that’s life. [Read: How to know when to stop texting a guy – Have you been texting too much?]
The accidental text on purpose is a nudge, it’s the technological equivalent of standing there waving your arms around, attempting to get to someone remember that you’re in existence.
Obviously, the hope is that you never have to attempt this particular strategy and that the person you’re spending your time texting is replying and firing off texts to you just as frequently.
It’s also very likely that you’ve received an accidental text on purpose yourself. Perhaps you didn’t realize it at the time but think back.
Have you received a text from someone you were chatting to that made no sense whatsoever, compared to the conversation you were having before? That’s exactly the type of text we’re talking about! That person might as well have been stood on a small rock in the distance, waving their arms around frantically, screaming “do you remember me?”
Yes, the accidental text on purpose doesn’t have much dignity attached to it when you break it down, but it’s also a genius way to attract the attention you’re trying to get without being super-obvious about it in the first place.
It’s a way to figure out whether they simply forgot to reply, or maybe thought they had and didn’t press ‘send’, or whether they’re actually ghosting you. [Read: Will she ever contact me again? How to know if she’s interested or losing interest]
This can be for a few reasons, but the most common one is boredom. Chatting over text isn’t the most thrilling thing in the world, and at some point, you are going to have to move things away from texting and into the real world!
Don’t do it too quickly, but don’t stall it either, otherwise, you run the risk of your virtual relationship running out of steam and never really making it to the fun part. [Read: Texting before the first date – A complete guide to doing it right]
Of course, chats also stall because one person isn’t really that interested and can’t think of a more dignified way of doing it. In that case, conversations simply tend to stop.
If you send the accidental text on purpose, you might get a curious reply and then radio silence, or you might not get a reply at all. If this happens, take the hint for heaven’s sake and move on. Don’t waste another second on it. [Read: 13 rules you need to follow when someone you like stops texting you]
However, if you play your cards right, sending this so-called accidental text might actually be all it takes to get things kick-started again and to keep things flowing.
Everyone forgets to send a text occasionally, and everyone goes through hard times at work which take their mind off everything else. If it happens once, okay, forgive it, but if you find yourself in the accidental texting situation again, perhaps it’s time to work out whether this person is worth it.
The “accidentally on purpose” text is a clear, sad, obvious ploy used by the schemingly inept for two purposes only: to make you jealous or to get you to respond, ideally both. But when you do, they “pretend” it was for someone else, sit back, and congratulate themselves on being a secret agent. [Read: Texting anxiety – How to send and receive texts without freaking out]
Many times, people want to send that accidental text to their ex. That seems to be the most popular accidental text.
It could be to just open up the conversation again, or it could be for some borderline revenge. Here are a few examples that are quite common for people to send to their ex.
“Hey, Joe/Jane! I’m looking forward to our next date. I can’t believe we’ve been out five times already!”
“Whoa, last night was crazy! I hope I didn’t get too out of control! 😉”
“Thanks so much for your compliments. I’m so excited!”
“Okay, talk to you later. I’m going shopping now to get a new dress for tomorrow night!”
“I had so much fun at dinner last night! Thanks again so much.”
“I can’t believe how fast time flies when I’m with you. It was so late when I got home!”
“I have to get going now. I’m meeting someone in 15 minutes.”
[Read: How to make your ex jealous and leave them begging for forgiveness]
The point here is that you want to convey not only that you are happy, but you might even be seeing someone else already. At the very least, you want your ex to know that you are not sitting around pining for them.
But really, only you know your true intent for sending the accidental text on purpose to your ex. Think about some of these things before you do it.
For example, are you wanting to tell your ex that you miss them? You might want to do that to make them feel better or you just have the burning desire to tell them you miss them. Or maybe you just want to see how they’re doing. [Read: 25 fun and cute ways to say hi in a text message in a casual way]
When it comes to sending an accidental text on purpose to your ex or anyone else, there’s not necessarily a right or wrong answer. But you might be agonizing over it. So, before you do it, here are some other questions to ask yourself.
How will it affect your life? And if you’re currently dating someone new, how will they feel about it? You might think it’s a good idea to send the text, but there are some consequences to doing so. So, you have to be prepared for whatever happens as a result.
[Read: How to start a conversation over text and keep them hooked to you in no time]
The accidental text on purpose is very useful for kick-starting a stalled conversation and sending a nudge for attention. It all comes down to how you use it and when, but it’s a great tool to have in your dating armory!
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