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23 Secrets to Flirt With Your Crush Playfully & Tease Them Into Liking You

You have feelings for this person, and you need to know how to flirt with your crush. If you follow these tips, they will be crushing back on you too.

how to flirt with your crush

We’ve all been in a situation where we sit next to our crush with the perfect opportunity to say something. Of course, most of us don’t. Instead, we sit there with sweaty palms thinking, waiting for them to say something. But if you want your crush to progress into something more, you can’t sit there waiting for them to say something. You need to learn how to flirt with your crush to get the energy going between you two.

How to flirt with your crush

Most people remember talking to their crush for the first time. Some are so nervous that they can’t speak a full sentence. It’s not easy. But once you pass that first encounter, talking to your crush becomes easier. Remember, they’re just people.

Once you start talking, it’s time to drop a couple of flirtatious hints at them. Nothing too serious, but it’s good to test the waters and see what they think about you. So, it’s time you learned the ropes. Once you know what to do, it’ll be easy.

1. You know how to flirt; you’re just nervous

Everyone can flirt. It’s a natural part of communication. Flirting is meant to build sexual tension between two people. So, you actually know how to flirt. It’s instinctual.

The real problem is you’re nervous. This is when you stutter, laugh nervously, or say something stupid. Now, if they’re smart, they see your nerves, and they do the talking to help you relax. [Read: 18 calm ways to eliminate nerves instantly]

2. Do not put them on a pedestal

This is another huge issue regarding knowing how to flirt with your crush. You know how to flirt, but the problem is, you see them almost as a celebrity. They’re this magical, perfect person you’re in love with.

We’re not saying that feeling this is bad, but when you idolize someone, you lose yourself in that image of them rather than seeing them for what they are.

3. Find your confidence

You need to be confident in yourself. It doesn’t matter if you flirt with your crush or not. The only way to flirt with them is if you feel you are worthy. 

They’re only human. So, if you feel that getting a haircut or a new shirt will boost your confidence, then do it. Do whatever makes you feel good. That way, they will see the confidence shine out of you. [Read: Subtle body language moves to appear more confident]

4. Make the first move

If you don’t make the first move, you’ll wait your whole life for them. Trust us on this one. Maybe you are in love with someone and are doing everything to get them to talk to you—and nothing.

Then maybe after a while, you run into them at a party and start a conversation. You might hit it off! The point is, you shouldn’t be scared to make the first move. Who knows what will become of it?

5. Don’t flirt right away

This isn’t a race. You don’t have to rush into flirting with this person. Take your time and go at a speed that feels comfortable for you. If it takes a week before you start flirting, that’s okay.

There’s no time limit to flirting, you do what makes you feel good. If you approach this person but are too nervous, just try having a normal conversation with them and see how it goes. [Read: 40 questions to ask your crush and subtly flirt with them]

6. Don’t let your friends influence what you do

This is so common when it comes to talking to your crush. Your friends will be highly involved, telling you what you should and shouldn’t do. Now, some of your friends will be right. However, at the end of the day, it really depends on what makes you feel good.

7. Compliment them

Everyone loves compliments. It’s a great way to show someone you pay attention to them without actually saying, “hey, I’m watching you and I notice every detail.”

It’s a subtle way of flirting and a good method to use to warm yourself up. What’s important, though, is that you actually mean what you say. People can tell when you just compliment to be polite. Don’t be that person. If you say it, mean it. [Read: 40 unbelievably cute things you can say to your crush]

8. Tease them

You also need to know how to be playful with your crush and tease them. You were probably told not to tease people when you were younger. Which was good advice, when you were five.

But now, delete that from your memory. Teasing is a great way to flirt with your crush. Now, don’t insult them. Instead, lightly poke them, and make them tease you back. This is what builds the sexual tension.

9. Touch them

Flirting isn’t just about what you say. It’s also about body language. Of course, deep down, you just want to rip their clothes off, but that’s not what we mean by touching. Save that for a little later, we’re still at square one!

Your touching doesn’t have to be aggressive; simply touch their arm when they make a joke or lean into them when you speak to them. Your goal is to get closer to them. Remember, you don’t want to make them feel uncomfortable. [Read: How to talk to your crush and make them fall for you in no time]

10. No cheesy pick-up lines

Whatever you do, if you end up freezing on the spot with your mind blank, do not use a cheesy pick-up line. Just please, don’t do it.

You get nothing out of it, and no one, man or woman, thinks the “falling from heaven” line you just used was charming. Just say hi if you can’t think of anything. [Read: The right way to start a conversation with your crush]

11. End conversations on a high note

You don’t have to keep a conversation running if you need to go or feel it’s best to cut it before it gets dull. You can feel when a conversation should end. And yes, we get that you really like them, but ending it on a high note will do you much better in the long run.

Plus, it adds a little mystery to you. You show interest, but you’re not throwing yourself at them, so it adds more excitement.

12. The eyes say it all

You flirt with your crush without even talking to them. How? It’s all in the eyes. Body language is a huge factor in flirting.

When you speak, make sure you keep eye contact just a little longer than you normally would. Remember, don’t keep eye contact too long, just a couple of seconds longer. Unless they look at you with that “I want to kiss you” look. [Read: How to use prolonged eye contact when flirting]

13. Ask for their number

If you’re not good at hinting for their number, then why not just ask them for theirs? If you flirt and things seem to be going well, why not?

 If you’re still at the stage where you’re introducing each other, then you can wait before asking them. However, if it feels good, then just ask. The worst thing that could happen is that they say no. [Read: Texting your crush – A step-by-step guide to doing it right]

14. Don’t try to change yourself

So many people try to change to impress their crush. Listen, if you don’t like shopping, but they do, this doesn’t mean you need to drag yourself around the shopping malls with them. If they’re into motorcycles, you don’t need to learn how to ride one. 

This isn’t an 80’s chick flick. Don’t change who you are if you want to know how to flirt with your crush the right way. Yes, you can get a new haircut or a pair of shoes, but don’t try to be someone else.

15. Look at their lips

Now, you don’t have to be creepy and stare at their mouth or anything. But you should glance at their lips sometimes with a lingering look. It shouldn’t be too long, just long enough for them to think, “are they looking at my lips, or was that my imagination?” You want to get across a subtle message that their lips are kissable. [Read: 19 secrets to initiate a first kiss and make them want to keep kissing you]

16. Call attention to your lips when you’re talking to them

If you don’t want to use the “look at their lips” trick, then you can try to call attention to your lips when you’re talking to them.

If you’re a woman, put on some lipstick or lip gloss when you’re with them. Or, you can bite your bottom lip or put a pen or pencil up to your lips. The point is that you want to send a subconscious message to them that you want to kiss them.

17. Invite your crush to hang out in a group

Asking your crush to hang out one-on-one is very intimidating and scary to many people. So, as an alternative, you can play it safe and invite them on a group outing. That way, it won’t be obvious that you’re crushing on them. But at the same time, you can try to talk to them individually at some point during the outing.

18. Smile as you walk past them

Whether you know your crush very well or not, you should smile and look friendly as you pass them by. If you know them, you can even be a little bit silly and pretend to smile seductively – and then laugh.

But if you don’t know them, simply smiling at them will let them know you are a friendly person and someone they want to talk to. [Read: How to smile more often – Baby steps to change your life forever]

19. Drop something in front of them

You have probably seen this trick in a lot of movies. If you “accidentally” drop something in front of them, it will be their natural instinct to help you pick it up. Another version of this is accidentally bumping into them. But that only works if you’re in a crowded area. Either way, it will get their attention focused on you.

How to flirt with your crush over text or social media

20. If you can’t do face-to-face, text

Maybe you’re not ready to start flirting with this person face-to-face. Sure, it can be easier to talk over text. You don’t have to look at them. Plus, you have time to think about what you’ll say.

So if you want to go easy when it comes to knowing how to flirt with your crush, texting may be a better way to do it without becoming nervous. Knowing how to flirt over text is another art within itself, so learn how to text properly to flirt successfully over text. [Read: 20 flirty ways to text your crush to get them interested]

21. Make common friends on social media

If you don’t know your crush very well and you’re just admiring them from afar, then you need to find a bridge to connect the two of you. So, if you don’t have common friends on social media, try to find some. It will be easier for them to notice you if you’re not a complete stranger who doesn’t share any of their friends.

22. Connect over social media and build a friendship

Once you connect on social media, start to like and comment on the things that they post. Compliment their photos or say something else that is nice. After a while, they will notice you. And then after you do that for a little bit of time, you can try to make conversation with them. Send them a DM and try to get to know them.

23. Be playful with your crush 

While texting your crush or talking to them on social media, you want to keep it light and playful. Everyone likes to laugh, so that’s why it’s good to stay away from things that are too serious – especially in the beginning.

[Read: 15 guaranteed ways to get your crush to like you]

Now that you know how to flirt with your crush, what are you waiting for? Sure, it’s scary, but you have to do it. What do you have to lose?

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Carol Morgan LP
Dr. Carol Morgan
Dr. Carol Morgan has a Ph.D. in communication and is a professor at Wright State University where she loves corrupting young minds. As a relationship and succes...