Just because you have needs doesn’t necessarily mean you want anything serious. So, it’s time to brush up on the casual dating rules.
Casual dating is great. Casual dating rules make it better. Because sometimes you just don’t want to be in a serious relationship. But you want to spend time with someone and have sex—casually. There’s nothing wrong with that.
In recent years, casual dating has become wildly popular. Not everyone is ready for something serious. If you work a lot or focused on school and exams, having a serious relationship isn’t on the top of your mind. So, this is where a casual relationship comes into play. [Read: 15 reasons why casual dating is the best ever]
Casual dating rules you need to know
I’ve been in a couple of casual relationships, and I can tell you one thing: you must have rules. I know, I know. You don’t want to have rules, but you must. Do you want this casual relationship to work? Or do you want to end up heartbroken in a relationship you decided would be casual?
No one needs to get hurt in a casual relationship. It’s the whole reason why it’s casual: it’s light, it’s fun, and it’s all about sex.
Learn the casual dating rules, and it will be a great experience for you. If not, you’ll learn the hard way and leave with a broken heart. Do it right, and a casual relationship is much easier than a serious one. If you want to keep it casual, there are rules to follow.
#1 Do you want a casual relationship? Is this something you really want? Or are you just doing this in hopes of the relationship becoming more serious? Aha, see what I did there? This is something you definitely need to think about because you need to walk into the relationship with no expectations. [Read: Dating vs. Relationship: 14 signs to know your real status]
#2 Be completely honest with yourself. It’s all about honesty. No one wants to get real with themselves because we all want to do things we shouldn’t do. You don’t want to leave a casual relationship heartbroken. So, be honest with yourself. Are you doing this for the right reasons?
#3 Be honest with your partner. You can’t casually date if you’re playing games. No one wants to be with someone who does this. Just be honest and straight with your partner. If you’re not honest with them, you can really hurt them.
#4 Define your boundaries. What are your boundaries or crosses the line for you? Everyone has a line, you just need to know what it takes to cross it. Casual dating can be a lot of fun, but only if you know your boundaries. What are you uncomfortable with doing? [Read: Learn how to set boundaries in dating]
#5 Make rules together. You are in this relationship together, right? So, it’s only fair if you make the rules together. Of course, you have your defined set of boundaries which is good. You both need to come to the table with your boundaries and talk it out. Then make a set list of rules. For example, sleepovers or no sleepovers?
#6 Don’t kiss and tell. If you’re sleeping with this person, be respectful and keep it on the down low. You shouldn’t be telling other people about your casual relationship with your partner and vice versa. If it’s nothing serious, then it doesn’t need to be made public.
#7 No future talks. Do not, under any circumstances talk about the future. Okay, you can talk about something happening three days from now, but other than that, nothing. Don’t mention spending time together in the summer or what you should do for Christmas. I thought this was only casual, remember? [Read: 10 things you must always remember when you’re in a casual relationship]
#8 If you’re getting feelings, leave. It’s normal for people to develop feelings for each other in casual relationships. We’re only human. If you’re catching feelings for this person, you need to think about things. Do you want something serious with them? Regardless, you should talk to your partner about it and see where they stand. If they don’t feel the same way though, you need to leave the relationship.
#9 No family or friend introductions. You should not introduce them to any friends or family. Remember you’re not dating them seriously, it’s only casual. The minute you bring your family into the picture, everyone’s expectations change. Your family thinks it’s serious and the other person is getting mixed signals. Not good. [Read: Follow these tips to keep your relationship casual]
#10 See other people. This is called casual dating for a reason. It’s not something serious, it’s not something that is supposed to tie you down. If it was, then it would be called a serious relationship. You’re in it for the fun. So, to keep it light, you should still continue to see other people. If you are having sex with other people, make sure they know what’s going on.
#11 Expect nothing. The only thing you should expect from a casual relationship is nothing. Okay, wait, you should be having good sex, but other than that, don’t expect much. Don’t let it evolve into something serious because that will only ruin what you have. If you like them, then this is something to talk about with your partner.
#12 Know when you’ve had enough. Sometimes, when we develop feelings for someone or they develop feelings for us, we struggle with cutting things off. You know deep down when you’ve had enough. Listen to that intuition because it’s probably right. If you’re feeling like the relationship has run its course, then it’s time to move on. [Read: 15 hurt-free rules you should never overlook in a casual relationship]
#13 Try different people and personalities. No, don’t eat them. What I mean is if you’re casually dating, date a variety of people. This will only help you narrow down what you like and dislike in a person. It’s really important to remember that you’re working on finding your ideal partner. [Read: The reasons why you might stay with the wrong partner]
#14 If you end it, end it respectfully. No longer want to date someone? Rather than ghosting them, tell them. I know, ghosting someone is the easy way out, but you dated them. You need to treat this person with respect. If you want to truly be mature and responsible, act like an adult.