You want to be with someone but aren’t looking for anything serious. So, commit to memory these tips for how to date casually without getting attached.
You decided to casually date—great! But now you have one problem. You’re not sure how to date casually without getting attached
We all want to meet someone. Sometimes it’s simply not the right time. Whatever it is, you know a serious relationship isn’t in the cards for you right now. Which is pretty mature. It’s good you’re not jumping into a relationship that you know you cannot fully invest in.
How to date casually without getting attached
Casual dating may sound easy, but, it’s not. We’re emotional beings. You just can’t shut off your feelings. But does this mean you shouldn’t casually date at all? No. Of course, you can casually date, but prepare yourself. [Read: What you should understand about the world of dating]
If you casually date without knowing the consequences or rules, you can really get hurt. No one wants that to happen, especially when you casually dated to avoid any connection and drama.
So, I’m going to help you out and show you how to date casually without getting attached. It won’t be easy, but if you follow these rules, it’ll help you keep it casual. You don’t want to get hurt.
#1 Ask yourself if you’re ready. Sometimes we’re just looking for casual sex because we’re newly single and looking for ways to stop the pain. Whatever the reason, be confident in why you want casual sex. Doing it for the wrong reasons can cause you to be seriously hurt and no one wants that to happen. [Read: How to know if meaningless sex is for you]
#2 Be up front. Before you even start casually dating someone, make sure they’re on the same page as you. Many of the problems around this type of dating is based on poor communication. If you are up front with them from the beginning, they decide whether or not they want to do this.
#3 No overthinking. If you’re wondering how to date casually without getting attached, don’t overthink it! When you overthink the situation, it makes it weird. You both agreed to casually date, this means you are both doing your own thing. Don’t overthink the situation or read into the other person’s actions. If you overthink, you dive down a deep rabbit hole which never ends well. [Read: How to stop overthinking and achieve peace in your life]
#4 Have meet-up limits. You’re supposed to have fun and then part ways until you meet again, but meeting again doesn’t mean tomorrow. Set a limit to the number of times you see them per week. The more you see them, the more likely you’ll get attached. Less is more.
#5 Don’t chat too much. You can talk when you’re seeing each other of course, but you shouldn’t be spending the rest of your day texting back and forth. This isn’t supposed to be anything more than casual, right? I mean, that’s what you wanted, right? If so, then the only time you text is when you’re figuring out when to see each other next.
#6 Keep it light. This person is strictly for having fun with. You’re not supposed to tell them your deepest darkest secrets. Keep the conversation light. Saying you had a bad day at work is fine, but talking about your childhood trauma is crossing the line. The less you indulge, the better. [Read: Are you starting to get attached to your friend with benefits?]
#7 Set rules. Make rules. I know, making rules is lame and unexciting, but they need to be in place. Why? Because we’re talking about your feelings! You don’t want to get attached, so ensure both you and your partner know where the line is.
#8 Stop seeing them if you have feels. You’re human, and even though these rules will help you out, the likelihood of you catching feelings is still high. The minute you feel something, talk to your partner. Maybe it’s mutual, maybe it’s not. Once you bring it up, you can find a solution together.
#9 Always be honest. This is just casual, you both know what’s going on. However, if you’re not honest with yourself and your partner, it’s going to end badly. If you start to feel something or want to stop, tell your partner. Don’t ghost them, be an adult.
#10 Have no expectations. If you don’t want to get hurt, expect nothing. If you’re doing this to try to get someone to be with you, don’t do it. You cannot go into casual dating expecting something to happen. Understand that casual sex isn’t going to land you a relationship.
#11 Keep dating other people. This is the ticket to not getting attached. Dating other people keeps things loose. Of course, if you don’t want to date other people, you don’t have to. Dating multiple people will help you have low expectations. [Read: Why dating multiple people is actually really healthy]
#12 Don’t plan for the future. Don’t plan a couple of weeks ahead, keep everything light and present. Plan a couple of days ahead but keep the pressure low. Plus, “living in the moment” is a nice mentality to have when you’re casually dating.
#13 Check in with yourself. From time to time, check in with yourself and make sure your feelings are still in a safe place. This is a common mistake people make. They don’t check in with themselves and then realize they’re in love with the person. Breaking it off will be really hard to do.
#14 Remember to connect to yourself. Don’t rely on your partner to satisfy you. This is when you develop feelings. So, to counterbalance, have a sexual relationship with yourself. Make sure you masturbate on a regular basis, giving yourself some much-needed love. If you can make yourself orgasm even better. [Read: The sexy benefits of solo masturbation]
#15 It’s okay if it’s not for you. You may discover you don’t enjoy casually dating. Listen, though it may be popular, that doesn’t mean you’ll enjoy it. What’s important is that you honor your feelings and accept whatever comes your way. Whether you like it or not, it’s your choice.