28 Tips & Positions to Use a Dildo & Masturbate Like It's the Real Thing!

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Ready to level up solo play masturbations? Here’s how to use a dildo for max pleasure, deeper orgasms, and total confidence in your body.

How to use a dildo and hit the orgasm high-notes

Positions when using a dildo

What is a dildo and who can use one?

Types of dildos

The benefits of masturbating

Where to buy dildos

How to clean a dildo

Give Yourself Permission to Feel Good

Ready to level up solo play masturbations? Here’s how to use a dildo for max pleasure, deeper orgasms, and total confidence in your body.

The first time most people try a dildo, it’s a little awkward. You’re hyped, curious, maybe even slightly nervous, and five minutes in, you’re wondering if the magic is broken… or if you are. But here’s the truth: knowing how to use a dildo to masturbate isn’t just about putting it in and hoping for fireworks.

There’s a whole world of sensual exploration, body awareness, and yes, orgasm science, waiting to be unlocked. And we’re here to walk you through all of it.

Whether you’re a total beginner or just haven’t quite hit the right high note yet, this guide will help you master technique, positions, and toy confidence. Because you deserve pleasure that actually satisfies. 📚 Source: Meston, C. M., & Buss, D. M., 2007, Why humans have sex

[Read: 37 Health Benefits of Masturbation, Bad Side Effects, & Other Must-Knows]

How to use a dildo and hit the orgasm high-notes

Knowing how to use a dildo may seem obvious to some people, but there are others out there who just can’t seem to get it right. And by that, we mean they’re just not getting off like they should.

If this sounds like you, don’t worry, you’re in the right place. We’ve got just what you need to learn how to use a dildo the right way. [Read: Intense orgasms checklist – Moves to guarantee one all the time]

1. Find the one that’s right for you

There are so many different types of dildos out there. Your job first is to find one that’s right for you. This can depend on a ton of things like length, girth, and even the material it’s made of.

If you tend to feel pain when your partner goes deep, then you should use a shorter size. You may even decide to get a few of them and test out which one is best for you. [Read: How to masturbate – 30 solo orgasm and female masturbation secrets for girls]

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As for material, you can choose from a variety of them like silicone, rubber, latex, jelly, glass, metal, leather, plastic, and even Cyberskin. Your best bet is to go to a sex toy store and feel a variety of them until you find one you like best.

2. Get one that’s curved

You also have to think about whether or not you want a realistic one or one that doesn’t look anything like a penis at all. The more unrealistic ones are usually curved and serve the distinct purpose of hitting your g-spot directly.

Choosing a curved one will be best if you really want to learn how to make yourself have great, intense orgasms. The function of the curve is to hit your g-spot as soon as you insert it. So if finishing is your plan, a curved dildo will become your best friend!

3. Use your dildo when you’re relaxed

This is essential. You need to have a large chunk of alone time to relax, feel comfortable, and get sensual in your own presence. Learning how to use a dildo properly takes time. You may need a couple of hours to really get the full effect.

So make sure you won’t be interrupted. It also doesn’t help if you know you have someone in the house who can barge in at any second. The best time to do this is when you’re completely alone for hours at a time. [Read: Alone time – Why you need it, how it helps, and how to make the most of it]

4. Set the right mood

Yes, you should always set the mood when you’re going to masturbate. You need some foreplay for yourself, too! Getting yourself set up and in the right mindset to let loose and have fun can help you finish faster.

And that means you’ll be able to figure out what works best when you’re in the right mood. So turn down the lights, put on some music that relaxes you, and get to it! [Read: Solo sex positions that feel just as good as sex]

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5. Place a pillow under your pelvis and lay down

Now it’s time to get started. Before trying any other positions, lay on your back and place a pillow under your butt. This will tilt your pelvis up and allow you to hit your g-spot much easier.

This is the best position to start with because, as we said, it allows for immediate g-spot stimulation, but it’s also super easy to do for your first time. Other positions do work great, but this one will help you start stimulating the right areas from the start. [Read: Pillow humping – What it is, the best positions, and sexy ways to hump it right]

👉 Want to experience the best quivering orgasms? Try the moves in these guides!

6. Use some lube

You need to use lube. Your dildo offers no lubrication and it’s just easier to get started when it’s all lubed up and ready to go. For that reason, you should get a great lube that you know works well.

You’ll also want to make sure it’s a kind that’s easy to clean off, since you’ll have to do that when you’re finished with your toy.

7. Slide in and start experimenting

You’re all ready to go now so slip it in and get started! The trick is to start slowly. Don’t just force it in and start moving it in and out at ferocious speeds. You need to get warmed up first.

So begin slowly and increase your speed as you start figuring out what feels good. This will ensure that you’re stimulating that g-spot just right. [Read: The most arousing erogenous zones for women all men should know]

8. Try some deep movements

Now that you’re all warmed up and ready for more pleasure, try moving the dildo in deeper. If you’re someone who tends to like deep penetration, this will be great for you.

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While it’s in pretty deep, move your pelvis around, too. This will help the dildo hit all the places that don’t normally get reached. And that means you’ll be able to figure out if there’s a sweet spot you’ve been missing all along.

9. Then mix it up and use shallow movements

You should also try some shallow, quick movements. Some women have their g-spot located a lot lower than others and don’t really need the deep penetration. This may actually be why you can’t finish if that’s something you have a hard time with.

Doing this can help you figure out if you really need deep penetration or if all you need is some shallow thrusting. Wiggle the dildo around at this shallow depth and see if there’s a depth that feels particularly good for you. [Read: Homemade sex toys you have to try – solo play or with a lover]

10. Experiment with different positions and places

Now that you’ve got the basics down you’re free to try new positions. Some people report that the best positions are doggy style, laying on your back, and even laying on your stomach.

Don’t forget that you can also try different places. If you have a dildo that has a suction cup on the bottom, you can try some standing positions in your shower. Switch it up and keep trying until you find that perfect position for you.

11. Rock it out

Try moving the dildo back and forth at an angle, so the tip is applying lots of pressure to the bottom portion of your vagina. This is packed with nerve endings so it’s sure to feel good.

If you have a curved dildo, you might find this a little easier than other types, but how you angle the dildo will give you different sensations. [Read: Why do orgasms feel so good? 21 whys and ways to make it way better]

12. Keep on turning

When you’re learning how to use a dildo, you need to experiment with different types to find your best fit. When you’re doing that, look for ‘juicers.’ These are lesser-known dildos but they’re highly effective!

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They come with a crank that allows you to keep turning the dildo in a circular motion, which can create seriously mind-blowing sensations.

13. Milk the g-spot

If you’ve always found it hard to locate your g-spot during regular sex or when masturbating with your fingers, you’ll find a dildo makes it a lot easier. Drag the dildo against the upper portion of your vagina, as though you’re angling it up toward your belly button.

Play with different movements and speeds and see which works best for you. [Read: How to hit the g-spot and make her squirm with pleasure]

14. Anal play

As we’ve said, dildos aren’t only for vaginas! If you’ve never tried anal play before, giving it a go when you’re alone and relaxed is the best time. Make sure you lube your dildo up well and start slowly. Play around and see what feels good to you.

Some people don’t enjoy anal play, while others find it extremely satisfying. Learn which situation applies to you! [Read: What does anal sex feel like both physically and mentally?]

15. Add temperature play

Wanna up the intensity? Try warming or cooling your dildo before use. Glass and metal dildos are especially good for this. Run it under warm water or cool it in the fridge (not freezer!) for a new dimension of sensation.

Bonus: this tricks the brain into heightening body awareness and arousal. 📚 Source: Kukkonen, T. M., et al., 2007, Thermal stimulation and sexual arousal: psychophysiological and neuropsychological responses

16. Use it alongside clitoral stimulation

Many people don’t orgasm from penetration alone, and that’s totally normal. Try using a bullet vibrator or even your hand on your clit while you use your dildo. It’s the orgasm dream team. More combo play = better odds of climax. 📚 Source: David A Puts, 2006, The Case of the Female Orgasm

17. Create a fantasy scenario in your mind

Mental arousal matters more than we give it credit for. Take a moment to close your eyes and visualize something sexy, a scenario, a memory, a hot daydream.

Dildos stimulate the body, but fantasy awakens the mind. 📚 Source: Janssen, E. & Bancroft, J., 2007, The dual control model of sexual response

18. Try it over your clothes first

This may sound strange, but stimulating yourself over your underwear with the dildo (like dry humping) can sometimes build arousal slowly and make insertion feel more intense later. It’s a tease, and your body responds well to anticipation. [Read: How to Try Dry Humping, 33 Hot Tips & Dry Sex Positions Perfect for Orgasms]

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Positions when using a dildo

Of course, learning how to use a dildo isn’t all about technique, it’s also about position. You can use your dildo however feels good to you, but these common positions are great for shallow and deep movements.

1. Standing

While lying down might be more comfortable in general, you can get some seriously deep thrusts going when you use your dildo as you’re standing.

Of course, you’ll need to bend your knees a little to be able to do this. Or you can use a suction cup dildo here and attach it to a table or other stand-height surface. [Read: 45 minxy sex moves and positions to impress a guy and blow his mind in bed]

2. On a chair

Again, suction cup dildos are good here, but any type of dildo will do the job. Squat over a chair and use the dildo from below you, almost as if you’re half-sitting and half-standing.

3. On the bathtub

The edge of the bathtub is a great spot and position to try when using a dildo. You have plenty of space for your legs, and you can sit or squat over the edge of the bath.

Just remember to be careful if there’s water around, explaining away an injury would be an awkward conversation! [Read: Shower sex – 18 sexy bathroom secrets to get wet, make love, and not slip]

4. On your side

The problem with lying on your back and using a dildo is that you need to stretch down and pull up your legs. Now, that’s fine, but try it on your side if you often get tired arms or legs.

This is more comfortable and you’ll find that because your legs are together, you get a tighter fit.

👉 Want to use your dildo in the most pleasurable ways possible? Use these guides!

What is a dildo and who can use one?

A dildo is a type of sex toy that basically resembles a male penis. There are lots of different types *more on that shortly* and different sizes too. That means you can find a dildo that suits all your preferences and needs.

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And that means that anyone can use a dildo. If you want to use one, go for it!

While women often use dildos as part of their masturbation routine, guys into anal play enjoy using them too.

Couples can even incorporate dildos into their sexual fun and games. Of course, lesbian couples might also use dildos, often the strap-on kind. [Read: How to choose a vibrator – A girl’s guide to picking the one you need]

Types of dildos

We mentioned that there a different types of dildos, so before we get into how to use a dildo, let’s quickly check out the different types.

1. Suction cup dildos

These types of dildos have a suction cup on the bottom so they can be secured to a flat surface, either horizontally or vertically. That way, you can go hands-free and it won’t go moving around while you’re using it. [Read: 40 best homemade dildos and sexy household things to masturbate with]

2. Thrusting dildos

Isn’t technology great?! These types of dildos have a setting that allows them to thrust without you having to do it yourself.

3. Glass dildos

While most dildos are made of silicone, PVC, or rubber, some dildos are made of glass. These are sturdier and obviously don’t bend, which some people enjoy. They also have a smoother and cooler feel.

4. Strap on dildos

As the name suggests, this is a regular dildo that has a strap-on harness attached. This allows a person to wear it and use it on another person.

Obviously, the person wearing it doesn’t have a penis in the first place, so we’re talking about part of lesbian play or for straight couples when the man wants to explore anal sex with his partner. [Read: 31 new things to try in bed at least once with your lover]

5. Double dildos

This is where things get complex but super fun! A double dildo is shaped like an arc, and it allows both the vagina and anus to be penetrated at the same time. Or both the vagina and the vagina. Or the anus and the anus.

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Dildos are truly what you make of them!

6. Vibrating

Vibrating dildos are very popular, and as the name suggests, it’s a regular dildo that has a vibrating function. [Read: Reasons why some women hate their vibrators]

The benefits of masturbating

For those of you thinking masturbation is bad in any way, shape, or form, you’re wrong. It’s actually super beneficial to you. It’s healthy to masturbate and learn what you like and need in the bedroom.

And hey, it’s not just about pleasure, research shows regular solo sex is linked to better mood, less stress, and even improved immune health. 📚 Source: Brody, S., 2010, The relative health benefits of different sexual activities

So not only is it a great stress reliever, but you’ll also make your sex life better in the process. When you understand what you need to get off, you can help your partner get you there and therefore, you’ll have a lot more orgasms.

Dildos are a fantastic addition to your masturbation fun. [Read: 37 health benefits of masturbation, bad side effects, and other must-knows]

Where to buy dildos

These days, you can buy sex toys very freely, but if you’re not so keen on going into an actual sex store and choosing a dildo for yourself, you can peruse online and have it delivered in plain packaging. Nobody will ever know what your delivery contains!

However, if you choose to go into a sex store, you can look at different types and really get a feel of what you might enjoy. Also, don’t be afraid to ask the staff for advice, they’ve heard it all before!

How to clean a dildo

One of the most important things to remember about learning how to use a dildo is that you’ll need to clean it properly after use. You don’t want all manner of nasty bacteria growing on it between use, that’s an infection waiting to happen.

The easiest way is to rinse your toy with warm water and wipe the surface first. Then, use antibacterial soap and gently scrub to give it a good clean. Rinse it well and make sure all remnants of the soap have disappeared.

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Then, dry your dildo on a clean towel and store it away until next time.

[Read: 48 tips, types, and positions to touch and finger yourself to make yourself cum]

Give Yourself Permission to Feel Good

Using a dildo isn’t about doing it the “right” way, it’s about giving yourself permission to explore, experiment, and find what feels good in your own unique body. Whether you’re moaning your way through all these tips, or just finding your groove with one or two, this is your journey. Take your time, ditch the pressure, and have fun.

Your pleasure isn’t selfish, it’s self-love. So go ahead and treat yourself like the queen (or king) of your own orgasms.

[Read: Pillow Humping: What It Is, 48 Best Positions & Sexy Ways to Hump It Right]

Learning how to use a dildo isn’t just about technique, it’s about giving yourself permission to masturbate, explore, play, and feel really good in your own skin. Whether you’re chasing orgasms, getting to know your body, or just having fun, there’s no right or wrong, only what feels amazing to you.