When you first break up with someone, it can often feel like the very worst thing in the world. You wonder how to forget about someone, and how you could possibly start to move on when it hurts so much.
The good news is that this feeling will pass. Time is the greatest healer, and in time, you will find yourself thinking about that person less and less until eventually you wonder what all the fuss was about.
Learning how to forget about someone who was important to you is really hard. However, if you find your life becoming severely affected because of it, you need to find ways to move on.
How to forget about someone – The steps you need to follow
There are several stages you must go through in order to learn how to forget about someone. Knowing about them, and accepting them, can help you forget about someone faster. So, let’s take a look at them. [Read: 10 stages of a breakup and how to get through them]
#1 Get in touch with your emotions. When you are trying to figure out how forget about someone, the worst thing you can do is try to bury your feelings. You need to be able to understand what happened and talk it through.
Writing a journal, talking with friends, going to see a therapist – however you need to deal with it and how you are feeling, do it. Expressing how you feel and coming to terms with it will help you move on.
#2 Make peace with the mistakes you made. It is very rare that someone leaves a relationship without having some regrets over their own behavior. It is easy to continue to go back to those moments when you wish you had said or done something different.
While it can be healthy to explore and learn from our mistakes, if you keep revisiting them, you will find it hard to let go. There has to be a point where you forgive yourself and move on. Put the past in the past, and use your mistakes to understand yourself better and improve. [Read: 11 determined steps to get over a breakup that you caused]
#3 Be kind to yourself. When you are going through a difficult period like trying to figure out how to forget about someone because it is hurting you, it’s important to take care of yourself. If you are finding it tough to get over someone, you may end up getting frustrated with yourself and annoyed when you don’t seem able to let go.
Remind yourself that this is a sensitive and difficult time, so you need to be kind to yourself in order to heal and get stronger. Do nice things for yourself. Hang out with friends, watch a movie, go for a massage. Try to remember that you cannot force yourself to get over someone too quickly. You need to give yourself time. [Read: How to survive the first 168 hours after a breakup]
#4 Get rid of reminders. When you feel ready, you need to get rid of the reminders that keep you holding onto those memories. Gather up their things, as well as photos, gifts, DVDs, even food they’ve left or souvenirs that remind you of times gone by.
If you can’t face throwing them out, simply store them in a box or bag somewhere where they can be out of sight.
#5 Don’t communicate with them. Even if you are trying hard to figure out how to forget about someone, it can be tough to not want to speak to them or see them. But this will only make it harder. Do everything you can to ensure you don’t get in touch.
Delete their number, and disconnect from them on social media. Get your friends to hide your phone if necessary! Reducing ways you can get in touch with them will make things so much easier. [Read: 12 reasons why the no contact rule always, always works!]
#6 Keep focused on the here and now. Take every day as it comes, and try to keep focused on the day and stay in the present. If you feel your mind wandering to the person you are trying to forget, try to bring yourself back. Always wake up with the mindset of trying to have the very best day you can.
#7 Take up new hobbies. Changing your routine and focusing on new things will help take your mind off the person you are trying to forget. Sign up to a class, join the gym, or do something relaxing such as yoga or meditation. [Read: 15 very effective rules to forget someone you once cared for]
#8 Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Trying to figure out how to forget about someone can feel like a lonely task, but spending time with others can really help you focus on what great people you have around you. Tell your friends and family how you are feeling, ask them to keep you busy and take your mind off things.
#9 Get some space. Sometimes taking a vacation or getting away for a few days can be just what you need to clear your head and come back with renewed determination and a fresh perspective. Creating new memories somewhere else and leaving sad, troubling thoughts far behind you can really help.
If you can take some time off, then go for it Some people want to make a huge change and are happy to pack up their bags and head off to explore the world. However, this is not feasible for a lot of people.
Regardless of this, if you are able to take a trip *even a very short one* to somewhere new, you’ll feel so much better about things when you return. [Read: The 8 most common post-breakup mistakes you need to avoid]
#10 Stay positive. Staying positive can really help when it comes to forgetting someone. If you can, why not start a ‘positivity journal?’ Any notebook will do. Here you can write down three positive things that you feel thankful for each day. This will help you end the day in a happy frame of mind knowing that there are things in your life that are good.
Staying focused on what’s important to you and the great things in your life will help remind you that life goes on without this person. Remember, there are still things to be grateful for, and the more you think about these things, the more you’ll appreciate them and feel like you will get over this. [Read: Positive vibes – 17 ways to welcome positive energy into your life]
#11 Write down the reasons why you want to forget them. Writing things down can make everything so much clearer. Recalling and recording your feelings about that particular relationship as honestly as possible will help you look at it objectively and give you clarity as to why you want to forget them and move on. [Read: How to move on and deal with a breakup with a smile]
Think about how they made you feel, how they made you act, and what went wrong. This can also be helpful when it comes to pinpointing and understanding patterns and themes that led to the relationship breakdown.
Figuring out how to forget about someone is no easy feat, especially if they were someone deeply important to you, who you really cared about, and had a massive impact on your life.
You’ll feel so many emotions when trying to get over someone. You’ll feel sadness, grief, anger, frustration, pain, loneliness, and heartache, and it can be a very confusing, challenging, and a painfully slow process.
[Read: 15 lessons you can learn from your own breakups]
Use these tips for how to forget about someone to try and make the process easier. At the end of the day, with time, you will start to feel better. And you will start to move on and forget – we promise!
Liked what you just read? Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, we’ll be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life.
LOVEPANKY IN YOUR INBOX
Get the very best of LovePanky straight to your inbox!