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16 Signs It’s Time to Move On and End the Relationship

signs it's time to move on

Do you ever wonder if you’re in an unhappy or wrong relationship? Use these 16 signs to find out if it’s time to move on and end your relationship.

When you enter into a romantic relationship with someone, you don’t expect it to fail.

You walk into the relationship with your hopes high, and look forward to a promising future with the one you’ve fallen in love with.

But not all relationships work out perfectly, even if the two people involved seem perfect for each other, do they?

What would you do if you find yourself in a relationship that’s just so wrong for you?

Would you walk away or would you endure the pain in the hope that things would get better soon?

You may be able to answer this question easily right now, if you weren’t caught up in the thick of a messy relationship.

And if you’re in a relationship that’s been harming you slowly, one day at a time, would you even be able to recognize the signs of a bad relationship?

[Read: 18 clear and critical signs of an unhealthy relationship]

As easy as it is to give advice to others, following the same is never easy, because reading the signs is always a hard thing to do when your mind is clouded with hope and love.

Is it time to move on and end the relationship?

When you see a friend who’s experiencing a bad relationship, it’s easy to point fingers or call them stupid for enduring such an obvious mess.

But when you experience the same scenario, you’d probably realize that something’s not right, but would you be able to pass a judgment on whether it’s fixable or something you need to walk away from?

As confusing or complicated as a problem in a relationship may seem, it starts and ends with a simple idea, and that’s happiness. And if you use happiness as a yardstick to decode your relationship, you’d find that it could help you understand yourself and the relationships you’re in, a lot better.

You’re not happy

It’s this simple really. If you aren’t happy in your relationship, you’re not in a happy relationship.

Now there are two things you can do here, you can try to fix the problems before it’s too late. [Read: The 10 most common relationship problems and quick ways to fix them]

Or you can move on, especially if you’ve tried to fix the relationship several times, and it still doesn’t bring you any closer to happiness.

16 signs it’s time to move on and end the relationship

So are you happy or unhappy in love? Here are 16 clear signs that can help you understand if you’re in a relationship that isn’t worth holding on to. Can you relate to at least a few of these signs in your own relationship?

All of us have our own thresholds when it comes to sacrifices and enduring pain in the hope of a better relationship. But if you feel like you’re fighting a losing battle while trying to bring happiness into your romance, ask yourself if you see these signs in your own love life. [Read: The 80 20 rule in relationships that make love work for you]

#1 The spark is missing. You don’t know why you’re in the relationship anymore. The romance is missing, there’s no chemistry or companionship, and both of you just exist in each other’s lives without any special reason. Sometimes, you secretly wonder why both of you are even together in the first place?

#2 You’re hurting. You’re misunderstood, hurt or angry all the time. Sometimes, you don’t even know why, but just thinking of your partner hurts you or annoys you. And sadly, even if you haven’t given this a thought, you haven’t been happy for a very long time. [Read: 16 silly bad habits that can hurt your relationship]

#3 You’re being taken for granted. Your partner uses you, manipulates your understanding nature and takes you for granted, no matter how nice you are to them. You’ve been doing all the giving, in the hope that your partner will see how selfless and loving you are, and change for the better some day. [Read:  Are you being taken for granted? – 16 very clear signs]

#4 You don’t see a future. You’re satisfied with your relationship, and you’re happy-ish. But every time you’re alone or try to see where your relationship is going, your mind tells you that your relationship has no future. And as hard as you try to visualize a perfect tomorrow, you can’t see your partner as a long-term lover.

#5 Uninvolved. Your partner doesn’t care enough to play an active part in your life, nor do they even try to understand your life. They’re emotionally uninvolved and unavailable, even when you try to make them feel involved.

#6 Sexual intimacy. You can’t remember the last time both of you made love. You’ve tried your best to bring the sizzle back into the bedroom, but your partner prefers to turn the other way and feign sleep. And it feels worse when you catch your partner admiring others when both of you are walking down a street. [Read: 10 naughty, sexy and fun ways to make long term sex feel like a one night stand]

#7 What holds both of you together? Are you in the relationship or marriage only because of the baggage that holds the both of you together? If the reason for the existence of the romantic relationship isn’t love, then you’re only fooling yourself if you believe it’ll ever bring you any happiness.

#8 Deep trust issues. You don’t trust your partner anymore. There may be a genuine reason for the lack of trust, or perhaps, both of you just have different expectations from each other when it comes to trust and believing in each other. But unless both of you even the creases on the issue of trust, the love will only fade, and never grow. [Read: The fastest way to get over trust issues in your romance]

#9 Different lives. There are no meaningful conversations between the two of you. You have nothing to talk about beyond small talk because your values, vision, and expectations from life are completely different from your partner’s views and both of you haven’t taken the initiative to find common grounds.

#10 Back to square one. It happens all the time. There’s a lot of love. And then comes a big fight. And then both of you communicate with each other and end the argument with a lot of love and affection.

And in no time, the same issues crop up all over again, and the same cycle starts all over again. Can both of you ever evolve as a couple if the same issues stagnate your lives and stops both of you from bonding together as a couple? [Read: The secrets of a love-hate relationship – Can it ever work?]

#11 Controlling behavior. People with insecure personalities don’t always confront their partner. Instead, they use manipulation, aggression and subtle controlling behavior to manipulate you into believing they’re right and you’re wrong. And before you know it, you’d feel lost and all alone because you would lose all your friends and turn into your partner’s slave. [Read: 15 shocking and yet subtle signs of a controlling partner]

#12 Individual lives. You think you love your partner, and you think you’re happy in your relationship. But yet, both of you just live together and have nothing in common, and lead individual lives.

#13 People pleasers. Your partner constantly goes overboard to please another person just to impress them and win their fancy. But they’d never ever do anything like that for you. [Read: 20 obvious signs of a people pleaser]

#14 Fault finding. Your partner makes you feel inadequate in the relationship all the time. They treat you like you’re not good enough, and always find faults with everything you do. They break you emotionally, and constantly expect you to change for them because you’re not good enough!

#15 You don’t enjoy their company. You dread spending time together with your partner. You feel comfortable hanging out with your lover as long as it’s with a group of friends. But every time you have to spend some *quality* time together, it makes you feel uncomfortable. [Read: 18 relationship turn offs that can ruin your romance!]

#16 Respect. Do you respect your partner as an individual? Does your partner respect you? For a relationship to be successful, respect for one another plays a very big part. If there’s no respect for each other, then there’s surely no hope for the future.

[Read: 20 sure signs to tell if your relationship is oh-so-over]

How many of these signs are you experiencing right now? And how many of these are acceptable to you? Now, ask yourself again, are you happy in love or is it time to move on and end the relationship?

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Cheryl James
Cheryl James
A lover of bad ideas and a true romantic at heart, Cheryl James hates excuses and loves integrity. She believes that one day can change everything and wakes up ...
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15 thoughts on “16 Signs It’s Time to Move On and End the Relationship”

  1. Lisa says:

    I’ve been dating a man for over two years. In the first year if our relationship I had learned he met up with his ex girlfriend after work. He owns a restaurant and she came into town from out of state and visited him. When the restaurant closed for the evening they went out for.a drink. He never told me and when I asked he became defensive saying it was strictly platonic. They had dated for six years and almost got married. I confronted her and she said if she wanted him she could still have him at the alter but there were no romantic feelings and she would continue to see him whether I liked it or not. We went to couples counseling and he agreed he would not speak or talk to her again. Fast forward to this year in February. He asked for a break on February 9th, and changed his phone number, I had access to his cell account because I pay the bills. The first call was to his ex and there were seven calls between them in a three week period. When we resumed seeing each other I confronted him. He became angry stating that there was nothing between them and that they only contacted one another as she made reservations while in town to go to his restaurant. He said he has maintained friendships with all of his exs who come into his establishment with their husbands and children and that I am being unreasonable and jealous. He said if chose to be with me and is not a cheater. I also saw him during this break period kiss another woman. When I confronted her she said he had tried to take her home, introduced her to his staff, and called her twice the next day to meet for lunch. He said this was the only time it happened and because we were on a break and having problems he reacted by trying to move forward. He apologized when we resumed our relationship, swore it never happened before and proposed to me with a ring to prove his commitment. He refuses to acknowledge how I feel betrayed over him seeing his ex annually. He won’t promise not to see her again because he feels I’m making this up in my mind when there is nothing to it but friendship and her stopping by to say hi. I’m confused because his words and his actions have caused a great deal if mistrust. It’s like her feelings come before mine and although they may not speak for a year, it still bothers me. After I confronted him, he blocked me from his cell records, his online banking and told me once he could trust me and I got over my jealousy he would grant access again. I’m not sure I want to continue a relationship with him. Especially when he refuses to cease contact with her knowing it hurts me. I also don’t like how he deflected the blame to me and won’t take any accountability or acknowledge how much this hurt my feelings. What should I do?

  2. R says:

    Lisa, dump his ass. He sounds like a douche. You don’t deserve to be treated like that.

  3. sandra says:

    I’ve been with my boyfriend for 2 years and after only 4 months of dating we moved in togather.
    Everything has been great, we hardly ever fight, when we got togather i was 18 now im 21 and he’s 26. He’s a great guy, hard working, nice, very ofectionate, caring, and loving. But i feel like im not good enough for him i try so hard to be everything he deserves but i still feel that i don’t reach his expectations. Even though he never tells me anything i can feel it. When we go out i see him looking at other woman, and if i tell him something he gets mad and says im “exaggerating” .
    Lately i feel like we have fallen into a rut! Samething every day nothing new! I want to go have an adventure something new something ddifferent, but when i tell him he’s never really interested, he just tells me “yeah later” and i honestly am getting really tired of she same old same old. When we got togather he made me give up all my friends and he kept all of his. He made me the moon and him the planet my world revolves around him. I can’t hang out with my old friends only family, but he can. I feel like my life is going no where and i feel like i should be somewhere else in life enjoying it. I wish he would have the same thrill for adventure as i do but he doesn’t sometimes i just wanna get out and run, run as fast as i can and not stop and get as far as i can possibly can from everything. Being stuck in this house all day everyday doing the same things every single day not nothing new not one day of the week and being with someone whos just not intereasted in doing something different is really getting to me!

    What should i do?

  4. samentha smith says:

    I have been marries to my husband for almost 2 years and I always feel like I have to ask for permission and he gets mad if I want to ga hang out with a friend and he goes thro my phone and looks at my texts and I cant even go swimming in the pool on the property he doesnt trust me and he is overprotective and controlling what do I do please get back to me soon

  5. samentha smith says:

    ifeel traped and like prisoner

  6. Francesca says:

    Samantha leave him. He is controlling you and none of his actions are your fault

  7. Don says:

    Samentha you need to sit him down and tell him you are not happy with the way he is! Maybe if you both went to a therapist and tried to work it out but from what I am hearing from you is he is a control freak and will make you miserable for the rest of your life! I was in a marriage like that and would have left but my wife died of cancer. I took care of her until the day she died! Leave and then you will be open to meet someone who will treat you like you deserved to be treated!

  8. Becky says:

    Been with this guy for 2yrs he just walked away this isnt the first time but i dont understand how can ge go away and it not bother him to not see or talk to me not even text as if i never was anythin to him..we didnt argue nor fight tgats the strange part..then top it off i find hes been goin on local porn meetup sights but yet our sex was great so why would he do any of this ?having hard time cuz im left hanging wondering wtf…

  9. Dee says:

    So me and my boyfriend been together for a year now and when we first got together everything was good and lovey dovey. Now it’s like I love him but I don’t want to be around him. He says hurtful things regarding me and my child, I see he is gonna always rock with his mom over me, makes me cry but tells me me and my daughter are cry babies, when we go somewhere we will have a good time but once we come back to the house things change and he gets mad at me or has an attitude toward me like he is annoyed or bothered with me for no reason. He says he makes moves happen for us when it comes to money but yet I am willing to go as far as selling my food stamps so we can have money for gas, food, etc. I just wish things were how they were when we first met. What should I do? I feel confused and lost.

  10. Rose says:

    I had a relationship which got broke up last month . We got to meet at working place and he was my senior and I had to report to him on daily basis. just in 2 months he got close to me and invited me to his house . I went but he tried to misbehave with me which I did not like. From then on I maintained distance with him at office as well but he forced me and begged me to talk to him in office and not to make any such reactions wherein others suspect him on his behavior. Later after that he started caring me a lot and he alwaz wanted me to meet him though we see each other in office every day . 24/7 he was connected with me. In between his friend from same team stated troubling me jus bz he was good to me and it went till filling a case against her . By the time we solved all such problems it was 2 years already .. Soon after that he quit the company and started to avoid me but I tried my level best and did everything that could make him feel happy with me. Jus in 3 months he left me saying I am dominating him .. But infact it was he who alwaz controlled my life till he was in my company by making me not to speak with any guy neither look at them. I was enjoying his domination on me assumping that he is possessive about me but when I was saying the same to him , he started saying to not to interfere into his life and its all his wish to do anything . Now am really upset with the way he treated me and the reason he gave me to cut off the relationship. Did he behaved nice with me bz he was scared that I would share wat happened at his place with all and take his respect off at work place or did I really dominate him???

    I am really not sure what went wrong but am deeply heart .

  11. Meg says:

    I’m about to break up with someone because he’s younger than me and he’s immature. He had one girlfriend before me, and I think he still cares about her, even though he denies it. He has recently been doing what he can to make me jealous by telling me about the wonderful times he had with his ex. He is reminiscing too much. It’s put a big strain on our relationship and I feel I can’t trust him anymore. I don’t feel his heart truly belongs to me. I have felt like I’m his second choice and he’s just settling because she left him, and now I hear that she wants him back, yet he tells me he’s not interested in her anymore. I don’t know what to believe, but I know I can’t live with this uncertainty much longer. Things are so tense between us. I love him and would miss our own good times terribly, but it’s no longer fun and I might feel a big relief if I could bring myself to cut him out of my life and never look back.

  12. Cheryl says:

    I’ve been with my boyfriend for 5 years. I jokingly tell anyone who asks if we’re ever getting married that we’re doing the “Goldie Hawn/Kurt Russell thing”, but knowing deep down I truly want to be married. To him, I’m not so certain anymore. In the beginning, it was pure passion. Maybe the relationship was built off nothing but sex. We moved in together after 3 months of knowing each other in a long distance relationship. I always felt I had to take care of his needs, like all of my relationships prior. He was an only child with both parents deceased, so I felt he needed me. Lately, it’s a constant battle of trying to communicate. He’s always bitter and cold, especially now that I’ve decided to go back to school and he’s having to pay the majority of the bills. I feel as if I have to walk on eggshells around him and I feel nervous when he comes home. It has been months since we’ve had sex, and it doesn’t feel like love making when we do; very routine and rushed. Maybe this is the end.

  13. Lynne says:

    I have been dating my boyfriend for 10 years. He never wants to come to my house. He lives with his father, in the basement, and he has a daily routine. When he goes to sleep at night he finally calls me for about 15 min before he has to go to sleep. He has no drivers license but he has a truck. I have a license but no vehicle so we can only see each other if he rides his bicycle to come see me. He won’t spend the night. He’s an alcoholic that binge drinks here and there. He won’t let me use his truck, it’s only worth a grand, but he doesn’t trust me to drive it. 10 years….He’s laid off a lot but he says he can’t leave his dad alone. His dad is 85. He gets around good. He also buys take out food for both of them. My “boyfriend”. He tells me he loves me more than anything and can’t live without me. He doesn’t help me with things around my house. He’s never helped me pay not one bill. I had 3 daughters no child support that I was raising. They have all moved on. He’s definitely not a strong male presence in their life.
    I’m not very healthy anymore. When things get bad he’s right by my side when I’m hospitalized. But he’s not around my home when I get released and really need help. I can’t count on him for anything. Seems like a no brainer right? If I break up with him I will have nobody. I don’t get out at all anymore cuz he ran off all my friends. And I’m really depressed now. I think it’s because of our relationship. Or lack of one. I don’t know what to do about it all any more. I don’t want to be totally alone. I might meet someone even worse. I’ve had the violence boyfriend, and the control freaks. I can’t trust my own decisions anymore…. I really need advice. A lot of it…Thanks for reading. Lynne

  14. Naee says:

    I’ve been on and off with my boyfriend since I was 14 I’m 18 now, in the beginning it was perfect I was young thought I knew everything about love. Through out the years of us being on and off we dated other people and forgot about each other. He end up going with this girl he always used to throw dirt in her name anytime she was brought up, I was around 15 at that time then a year later they end up being together and that broke me, I was messed up for a long time, he said she was his soul mate and when I confronted hem about it he told me she made hem see something in her that made hem love her again?? I never got that, but he said he loved me then I told hem he can’t love me and her and what hurtee the most is when he said I love you but I’m not in live with you. That right there just made me move on w/ unanswered questions. A few months back we started back talking and now were together but I’m not sure if Im still in love with hem I don’t know I’m scared I don’t want to waste time being with hem and it will never work and I say this because I catch myself thinking about cheating any chance I get, when I see his flaws it bothers me a little but I just don’t understand when I see hem I get existed and butterflies in my stomach. I don’t want hem with no one else but I want hem to chase me any time we have a fall out and if he don’t I just say forget the relationship. I want us to have a healthy relationship because I do see a future with us kids marriage and everything. I want to tell hem that I’m not in love with hem but I know for sure it will devastate hem. He cherish me, gives me compliments forwbr talking about having kids and how many, there names. Any chance he fits he tells me he love me. He sees years and years with me but I don’t know about me if I even see months. I’m so confused I don’t know what to do I want to be with hem because I might not find someone that will treat me like I’m supposed to be treated , I’ve been through so much pain with other relationships that I don’t want to go through, I guess I’m just trying to avoid the hurt by staying with my boyfriend knowing that he won’t be the one that does that….. Give me your thoughts on anything I really need some good smart advice , Thanks for readiny problems

  15. emily b. says:

    As sad as it may sound this is totally true. I mean, there comes a time in every relationship when you begin to question why you are with that person and if you should continue with them. I tell you, me and my boyfriend Victor have those problems. He is just so jealous and likes to have a control of everything I do. If I don’t pick up my phone when he rings he starts making up things I must have been doing with other guys and stuff. I can’t take it anymore. And this article made me realise that. Hey! We all have one life and I surely don’t intend to waste it with explanations and arguments about things I haven’t done.

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