There is nothing more frustrating than knowing you want to make changes, and that you have to make changes, but not having the first clue about how to change your life.
Are you sitting there a little disillusioned with life and wondering if this is all there is? Maybe even considering how to change your life, but not really knowing if it’s possible. There is good news coming your way.
You can change your life whenever you want. It simply takes planning, openness, and a willingness to try. It doesn’t matter whether you want to make a full life overhaul or just change a few things here and there. Being open to trying new things is the first step, while committing a little time to soul-searching is another. [Read: How to learn to be vulnerable and welcome life in]
Are you ready to change your life?
Before I get into the process of learning how to change your life, ask yourself whether you want to make changes for you, or whether you simply feel you need to because someone else is. You see, the rise of social media is wonderful on so many levels, but it’s quite damaging on others.
You see your friends posting about their wonderful life on Facebook and Instagram and can lead you to wonder why you’re not traveling around the world every few months, why you’re not being asked to all these parties, and why you’re not rustling up a brand new recipe to post to your friends every single evening. How do they find the time?
Don’t believe everything you see on social media. Most of the time, this is simply people posting falsities to make others feel bad, which in turn makes them feel good. This is part and parcel of human behavior, and not a particular pleasant side to humanity either. Unfortunately, we all do it, whether we’re aware of it or not.
For that reason, make sure that you are embarking on changes for you, because you want to do it, not because you want to litter your social media feeds with killer posts to gain likes. [Read: How to avoid the danger of social media insecurity]
How to change your life: 12 little steps for a dramatic change
Change your life for the right reasons—for you!
#1 Say ‘yes’ more. Make it your aim to say ‘yes’ more than you say ‘no.’ I’m not suggesting you say ‘yes’ to every single invite or idea that comes your way, but make a concerted effort to take more risks. Go to more social events, take people up on suggestions, and see where it leads you. Who knows, you might meet a new love interest, a new friend, or find a new job in the middle of it all!
#2 Kick out unhealthy habits. You will instantly change your life by kicking out habits which are unhealthy and damaging. This means no more smoking, no more excessive drinking, no drug taking, no being lazy, no self-deprecating talk, and basically focusing on healthy coping mechanisms, as opposed to unhealthy ones. You’ll feel better as a result! [Read: How to learn these 12 simple, daily self-love habits]
#3 Focus on health and wellbeing. While kicking out unhealthy habits, focus on your overall health and wellbeing. Make sure you eat a healthy, balanced diet, drink more water, cut down on takeaways, buy into moderation, and exercise. Focus on your mental health too. Take out anything that’s bothering you and learn how to manage stress and pressure healthily. [Read: How to be emotionally stable and find your zone of perfect calmness]
#4 Spend more time with those you love. I guarantee you that at the end of your days, the biggest regret you will have is that you didn’t spend enough time with your loved ones. It’s time to change this! You’re not too tired to go out, just go.
Make sure date night is a thing which is never cancelled. Head to your parents’ house for Sunday lunch without fail. Talk to those friends you have lost touch with. Focus on relationships, not material things.
#5 Work to live, don’t live to work. I’m all for finding a job you love, which gives you something to pour your effort and creativity into, it’s something I love with the job I do, but I also know about work and life balance. Make sure that your job isn’t taking over your life. You work in order to live, you should not be living in order to work!
#6 Identify your dreams and make a plan. What is your bucket list? If you haven’t got one, it’s time to write one! Figure out what your dreams are, and I’m talking abut the realistic ones. You’re not going to be discovered by NASA with zero experience! Identify the dreams you have and work towards putting a plan together to make them a reality. It might take time, it might even take a lot of time, but even baby steps are progress. [Read: The couples bucket list – 20 things every couple has to try]
#7 Do something new every day. This doesn’t have to be anything huge. It can be something as simple as trying a new hairstyle or cooking a new dish for dinner. Just make sure that every single day you try something new. By doing this, you’ll probably find new hobbies to continue pursuing, and you have no idea where they might lead! [Read: 15 ways to discover self-love and happiness]
#8 Accept yourself and your past. Most of us have some kind of baggage that we hang onto. We don’t realize that over time it makes us bitter and holds us back. Let go of your past by accepting it and moving on. At the same time, accept yourself for who you are, you’re wonderful just as you are!
By doing this, you’re allowing yourself to fly in so many ways, without holding yourself back with the negativity of past experiences and false expectations.
#9 Dare to date outside of your ‘type.’ If you’re guilty of sticking to the same ‘type’ when you date, you’re missing out on the people you’re filtering! Remember, opposites attract, so dare to date someone you wouldn’t normally consider and see where it leads. You might just find a partner of your dreams!
#10 Let go of grudges. I mentioned accepting your past, but along the same lines as that comes letting go of grudges. There is nothing positive about holding a grudge. All it does is breed negativity and contempt. Let it go, accept it, forgive it, and move on. You’ll feel so much lighter as a result.
#11 Escape the negative mindset. Humans are hard-wired to be negative first and positive second. You can change that by actively turning your negative thoughts into positive ones! Reframing is a popular cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) method. It takes time and practice, but you simply come up with a positive alternative for every negative thought you have. Then, repeat it until it becomes second nature. Your life will change for the better! [Read: 14 easy mantras that will transform your life]
#12 Really understand what matters in life. We put so much emphasis on material things and trying to please other people, that we fail to realize what life is all about. The most important things are family, friends, relationships, health, experiences, and happiness.
It has nothing to do with the latest iPhone or laptop, and everything to do with happiness and social connections. By knowing what is really important, you can channel your energy in the right direction.
[Read: A roadmap for emotional wellness and living life with intention]
If you’ve been wondering how to change your life with no idea where to start, these 12 points should give you food for thought. Remember, this is your novel, so make sure you write a good one!
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