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27 Secrets to Focus on Yourself, Grow as a Person & Create Your Own Sunshine

Do you feel like you’re losing your identity? Here’s how to focus on yourself and find your own sunshine when you feel like you’re losing yourself.

how to focus on yourself

Getting to really know yourself, learning how to focus on yourself, and making time for yourself is so important. And for many people, doing so can make a huge difference when it comes to how happy, healthy, and positive they feel.

It might be that you have gone through a period of stress, lost your job, ended a relationship, or moved somewhere new. Or you might simply have decided it’s time for a change.

How to focus on yourself – The small, but powerful, steps to love yourself

Whatever your reasons, taking a step back to re-evaluate your life, asking yourself important questions to discover what makes you happiest, and simply putting time aside each day/week/month to relax, pamper, and indulge is a fantastic idea, and is something everyone should do.

So you want to know how to focus on yourself? Here are all the ways to start taking better care of you. [Read: 12 instant hacks to find happiness in life]

1. Respect who you are

Before you learn to focus on yourself, you must learn to respect yourself. Do you genuinely respect yourself?

Stop focusing on your negative aspects and focus on the aspects you’re good at. We’re all human and all of us have our own flaws and good sides, whether it’s seen by others or not.

By only acknowledging the negative side, you’re forgetting the wonderful side that can actually be shared with others. [Read: How your self-respect affects you and all the relationships in your life]

2. Decide what you want to do

It’s always good to take stock from time to time and ask yourself, ‘is this really what I want to be doing?’

It’s never too late to have a career change, and if your job isn’t challenging you, doesn’t satisfy you, doesn’t make you enough money, or you just downright hate it, then perhaps it’s time to think about what you really want to do, and then begin to plot the way to get there. [Read: Are you feeling lost in life? Use these 6 lessons to find your way back]

3. Visualize what your life should be like

Positive visualization is a technique that many people swear by. They think about all the things that they want from their life – be it getting that promotion to losing 20 pounds – then they imagine themselves achieving their goals.

The point is to focus so hard on the things you want that you start to believe they have already happened to you, or at least that there is no option but to succeed. [Read: Positive vibes – 17 ways to welcome positive energy into your life]

4. Figure out where you need to improve

Knowing how to focus on yourself is all about honesty, and being honest with yourself includes figuring out the bits which you don’t like, too.

Everyone has areas in their life that need improvement, from being a bit tidier around the house to being kinder to their partner.

Whatever your areas of improvement are, try to get to the root cause of why you feel as though you have let yourself down, and then figure out what you can do about it.

Remember, making little changes and taking baby steps is the best way – if you try to do too much at once you’ll just set yourself up for failure.

5. Exercise more

Exercise releases endorphins which make you feel good. Plus feeling fit, stronger and healthier, does wonders to boost your self-esteem.

Focusing on yourself is about taking good care of yourself so try to eat right, drink plenty of water, cut down on junk food and alcohol, get moving, and you’ll soon start to feel more energetic, happier, and healthier too. [Read: 25 inspirational tips to get motivated and work out]

6. Be determined and believe in yourself

Remember that old adage, ‘every long journey starts with a single step.’ You may be feeling low or unhappy being the person that you are.

But if you are truly determined, you can change every single thing you hate about yourself starting today.

If you really want to know how to start focusing on yourself, be determined and focus on starting to make little positive changes every day.

It could be issues related to your work, health, or even your own personal dreams. Whatever they may be, be determined and pursue them with all your heart. By doing this, you’ll respect and love yourself a lot more.

7. Have a clear out

There is nothing more satisfying when trying to make a fresh start than having a good old clear out. If you want to know how to focus on yourself, then you need to free yourself of baggage and clutter.

So why not make some time to work through each room in your home, get rid of the things you don’t need, and only hold onto those things which bring you joy? Doing so makes you feel lighter and more determined to achieve your goals.

8. Spend time with people who are important to you

Surround yourself with people who you love, and get rid of those who treat you badly, don’t support you, or bring you down.

Spending time with family and friends who make you smile, encourage you, and bring out the best in you is the perfect way to share your ‘me’ time with others. [Read: How to feel happy – 13 proven strategies for instant happiness]

9. Focus on your appearance and posture

Appearances may be a shallow aspect. But unfortunately, it’s the shallow things like clothes, and body issues that make us feel worse and hate ourselves even though we may possess a lot of good stuff that’s hidden from the view of others.

Spend time understanding your physique and pick clothes up that look good on you. Pamper yourself, get a great haircut, buy well fitting clothes and dress like a million bucks. You won’t believe how much of a positive boost just good clothes and a great posture can give anyone.

After all, when you look good and are complimented by someone else, you’d feel a lot better about yourself, wouldn’t you? [Read: How to look hot – 18 tips to go from wallflower to super-scorcher!]

10. Get a role model

You may not need a role model to understand how to focus on yourself, but it can be a great help in becoming a better person and have a focused dream.

Do you look up at someone or wish you could be like them? By understanding the way they think or deal with difficulties in their life, it can give you the inspiration to learn and become a better person by following in their footsteps.

11. Go for walks

Getting out there into nature can be a great way to reflect and feel more at one with the world.

Going for a walk somewhere beautiful often puts problems into perspective and makes you feel refreshed and inspired and ready to tackle just about anything!

12. Write a journal

Keeping a journal is a fantastic way to capture your thoughts and feelings, express your emotions, and figure things out that may be troubling you. Try to write in your journal every day and keep it just for you.

13. Set goals

Focusing on yourself and becoming a better version of you won’t work unless you set yourself some clear goals for change. Write your goals down and stick them up somewhere so you’ll see them often.

Always keep your goals in mind and focus on how proud you’ll be of yourself if you achieve them. [Read: How to improve yourself – 16 powerful secrets of self-improvement]

14. Push yourself to achieve more

Every time you push yourself to achieve more, it makes you more confident of your own abilities. And confidence always draws awe and respect, which leads to self love and more focus. Bring positive changes into your life one day at a time.

Even if you could spend just an hour every day on making yourself a better person, you would be able to see a considerable change in a month’s time.

Learning to focus on yourself is all about self-love. And success and self-love comes with perseverance and dedication, and it can be achieved as long as you don’t give up on yourself. [Read: How to be successful in life]

15. Do something new

Trying something new, do things that challenge and scare you, take up hobbies. Experimenting is how you keep life interesting and is a fun path towards self-improvement.

When you discover a new hobby or pastime that sparks your interest and that you develop a passion for, it can change the course of your whole life.

16. Meditate

Meditation isn’t for everyone, but many people swear by it. Meditation helps you to calm your mind, clear your head, and deeply relax.

If you feel as though you have too much going on, try to practice meditation daily to help you focus on yourself, relieve stress, and gain clarity about what’s important. [Read: How to be present and find your zone of perfect calm]

17. Relax

If you want to know how to focus on yourself, you must find time to relax. Only you know what makes you feel that way, be it reading a good book or going for a 10-mile hike!

Whatever you like to do to relax, make time for it, and you’ll feel so much better. [Read: How to build self-confidence – 16 ways to realize you’re worth it]

18. Treat yourself

Being a little indulgent now and again can be just what you need to boost your mood.

Everyone deserves a treat from time to time, so go on that shopping spree or spa weekend or that big night out – you deserve it.

19. Go out and meet people

You’re not alone. You aren’t the only one who feels miserable with their life. Life isn’t unfair only to you.

The decision to change your life and understand how to focus on yourself still lies in your own hands. Always remember that. Change begins and ends with you, and your determination.

Make the effort to meet new people. Join clubs or communities that interest you and meet people who share your passion or dreams.

By interacting with happy people who share your thoughts, you’ll feel better about yourself. And falling in love with yourself is the first step in learning how to focus on yourself and work towards a better future. [Read: 16 exciting ways to find a new crowd to hang out with]

20. Don’t be too critical of yourself

Learning to love yourself takes time and initiative. It’s a wonderful feeling to look good, be admired by everyone around you and loved by everyone including yourself.

But it does take time. Never be too critical of yourself and expect immediate changes.

Give yourself some time, and wait for the good times to roll in. Just trust these tips and allow the tree of love and confidence to take root and grow into a wonderful beauty, without being critical of the progress.

21. Never be a pushover

You can listen to someone else, but never let them dominate you or control your thoughts. Every time you let someone push you over, your confidence takes a beating and you end up hating yourself.

If your friends take you for granted or treat you like you’re not important, perhaps it’s time you stopped spending so much time with them.

Spend time with people who respect you and want your company, and your ego and the love for yourself will grow. [Read: What makes someone a pushover and how to learn to take a stand]

22. Stay in control of your life

Some men feel emasculated by their wives, and some women feel like they’re being dominated by a domineering husband. Try to stand on your own two feet and your own achievements.

By letting someone else control you or your opinions, you’d feel conflicted in your mind and end up feeling weak and helpless.

On the other hand, hearing negative opinions from the people you love too can make you dislike yourself. If you want to learn how to focus on yourself in a relationship, don’t let anything negative come in the way of your positivity and enthusiasm to have a better life.

Your loved ones may be trying to help you at times, so take their advice if you must, but always stay in control of your own life and listen to the voices in your head.

23. Be grateful

At the end of each day, write down three things that you are grateful for. Remembering what we have to be thankful for keeps us feeling positive and reminds us of all the good things we have in our lives.

24. Let your hair down

If your life has been feeling a little serious lately, it might be time to let your hair down. Phone up your friends and plan something super fun where you can let loose and go a bit wild. [Read: 13 Inspiring ways to bring out the best in yourself]

25. Stop beating yourself up

Focusing on yourself is about trying to understand yourself, flaws and all, and being a little kinder.

We are often our own worst enemies and critics, and if we said the things we say to ourselves to other people, we probably wouldn’t have any friends left!

Remember to be kind to yourself. You might make mistakes, but so does everyone!

26. Realize you can’t control everything

No matter how hard you try, and no matter what you do, there will be things that you can’t control which means that sometimes things just won’t go your way.

Try to learn to let go, forgive, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and just keep on trying! [Read: How to love yourself and find true happiness from within]

27. Start loving yourself!

Love and happiness comes from within, and unless you’re ready to respect yourself for the positive person that you are, you’ll have a hard time loving yourself, getting any love from the world, or focusing on yourself.

[Read: How to improve yourself – 16 powerful secrets of self-improvement]

Knowing how to focus on yourself is so important. And with these tips, you can de-stress, re-focus, get your life back on track, and create your own sunshine. Good luck!

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Vinod Srinivas Serai
Vin Serai
Vin Serai is the founder of LovePanky.com, and has delved deep into the working of love and relationships for almost two decades. Having dipped his feet in almo...