There are already a number of features out in cyberspace covering the whole “questions to ask your partner” topic. Sometimes, these are written in due earnestness, and other times they’re a little more flippant. Our list of 18 “what if” questions below covers both sides of the humor spectrum, with suggested “Good,” “Neutral” and “Bad” responses ranging from the lovable to the frighteningly funny.
Questions to ask your girlfriend
Irrespective of the laughs, however, there are some very good points to be taken away from the kind of responses you can expect to get. If those responses are mainly “Good,” then it sounds like you’re dating a perfect angel. Getting a majority of “Neutral” answers probably means you’re dating a more practical woman, someone who no doubt loves you, but also has an eye on the bigger picture. If her answers are more along the “Bad” lines, then reading some of the example responses below should make you realize exactly what kind of a person you’re dealing with.
#1 What if you could teleport, Star Trek style, to anywhere in the world?
Good answer: I’d teleport to the bedroom and take you with me.
Neutral answer: I’d probably take us somewhere nice and relaxing where we could get some quality time together.
Bad answer: I’d teleport anywhere that would take me away from your sh*t!
[Read: 8 tips to have a great time when you travel as a couple]
#2 What if you could go back in time?
Good answer: I’d go back to when you were younger and watch you along every step of your life to becoming the man you are now.
Neutral answer: I’d go back to when we first met and laugh at how awkward we were.
Bad answer: I’d go back to when you were conceived and persuade your father to wear a condom.
#3 What if the world were about to end?
Good answer: I wouldn’t care as long as I was with you.
Neutral answer: I’d probably pray for forgiveness and take a little time to think about everyone I’ve ever met who’s ever meant anything to me.
Bad answer: I’d thank my lucky stars I was finally getting away from you.
#4 What if your parents didn’t like me?
Good answer: I wouldn’t care. If they didn’t like you, then I wouldn’t want to see them much anymore.
Neutral answer: It would be really difficult, but we’d just have to work something out.
Bad answer: What do you mean “if”?
[Read: Meeting your girlfriend’s parents: 21 dos and don’ts]
#5 What if my brother hit on you?
Good answer: He wouldn’t dare. He knows how much I love you.
Neutral answer: I wouldn’t know what to say. I think I’d just be embarrassed.
Bad answer: I’d probably just f*** him again.
[Read: Should you ever forgive a cheating partner?]
#6 What if I liked to dance naked while listening to One Direction?
Good answer: I’d have you certified.
Neutral answer: Errrrm, I’d be a bit weirded out.
Bad answer: Sounds delightful. Can I join in next time?
#7 What if I had no money… would you still love me?
Good answer: I’ve never thought about your money for a moment.
Neutral answer: It depends how you’d lost it.
Bad answer: Nope.
[Read: 11 signs you’re being used for sex or money]
#8 What if we were stuck in an elevator?
Good answer: Sounds like a perfect excuse for a bit of romance.
Neutral answer: I wouldn’t really like that. I’m scared of confined spaces.
Bad answer: I’d throw myself down the lift shaft rather than stay there with you!
#9 What if I asked you to move in with me?
Good answer: I’m already there, my love.
Neutral answer: I’d need some time to think about that.
Bad answer: Sure! Right when the devil comes skating over hell with a blue moon under his arm and a pack of flying pigs pulling his sleigh.
[Read: The 8 big cons of moving in no one wants to talk about]
#10 What if I only had one month to live?
Good answer: I’d be devastated. I’d want to live a lifetime with you in those thirty days.
Neutral answer: It would be really difficult emotionally, but we’d still have to think about getting our affairs in order.
Bad answer: I just hope it’d be in February.
#11 What if you fell out of love with me?
Good answer: That would never happen, darling.
Neutral answer: I hope we’d be mature enough to talk about it like adults.
Bad answer: Dude… that happened the day before I’d even met you.
[Read: 12 signs you’re starting to fall out of love with your partner]
#12 What if I got amnesia?
Good answer: I’d remind you of all the beautiful things we’ve done together and nurse you back to full health.
Neutral answer: I’d make sure you got the best help our health plan could afford.
Bad answer: I’d pretend I was your cleaner and hand in my notice.
#13 What if I went to prison?
Good answer: I’d be there waiting for you at the end of it, no matter what you’d done.
Neutral answer: I don’t know, darling. It all depends on why you went.
Bad answer: I’d be aiding the prosecution.
#14 What if you were pregnant?
Good answer: It would make me the happiest woman on earth.
Neutral answer: Things would be tight financially, but I’m sure we could manage.
Bad answer: It depends whose baby it was.
[Read: 11 ways to know if both of you are ready to have a baby!]
#15 What if you were stranded on a desert island with me, but we had no food?
Good answer: I’d learn how to fish so I could cook for you every day and we could live together in tropical bliss.
Neutral answer: I guess we’d have to work out some way of getting off the island before we starved.
Bad answer: I reckon I could live off you for at least a fortnight.
#16 What if I got really fat?
Good answer: I wouldn’t care. It’s the person inside who I love.
Neutral answer: I’d probably try and help you lose some of it before your health suffered.
Bad answer: You wouldn’t repulse me any more than you already do.
[Read: Should I speak up about my partner gaining weight?]
#17 What if I had a twin brother?
Good answer: That would be wonderful for you. Another close person in your life with whom you could share things.
Neutral answer: That would be nice as long as he’s not over here ALL the time.
Bad answer: Yes! Double the fun!
#18 What if you found out I used to be a girl?
Good answer: I’d love you for who you are, not what you were.
Neutral answer: I’d want to know why you’d never told me that before.
Bad answer: Well, that would sure explain why you have no balls.
[Read: 60 get-to-know you questions for a new romance]
Although the responses to the questions above are a little tongue and cheek, there is no question like a “what if” to get to the bottom of someone’s true personality. So next time you have a little down time with your girl, try some of these questions on her. Heck, maybe it’ll even spark some great conversation.
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