Technology is a wonderful thing on so many levels. No more awkward flirting with someone you like at a bar or plucking up the courage to make the first move in person. No more sending body language cues and wondering if the other person picks up on them and doesn’t mark you down as strange. But it doesn’t help us in the how to respond to late night texts category.
Yes, technology has opened up the world of dating, and then some. We can connect with people in ways we never could before, and meet people we would never have crossed paths with too.
The problem is, technology can also be used against us. It can easily confuse you to someone’s true intentions. [Read: Friendly vs flirty – 12 subtle signs to stop reading the wrong signs]
What game do you want to play?
What do you do when you get a text or message on your phone late? Is it a booty call? Is it someone simply thinking of you late at night and wondering if you’re okay? Is it a mixture of the two?
It’s so confusing!
For me, handling it in the right way is key. This could shape the future of whether you have a relationship, a fling, or what not!
It also opens up a huge area of debate! Should you go down the flirtatious to sexual route with someone early on or should you wait?
For the most part, understanding how to respond to late night texts depends on how you want to play the game. Do you want to go for it and throw caution to the window, or would you prefer to be a little more held back?
It’s a choice you must make. How you reply to this text will speak volumes. Let’s break it down.
[Read: 15 ways to tease and flirt with a friend without making things weird]
What does a late night text actually mean?
This is the crux of it all. What does a text arriving in your inbox or into your phone mean when it’s past everyone’s bedtime?
In my opinion, there are two explanations to this phenomenon.
Firstly, they’re thinking about you when they’re quiet and chilling out, perhaps laying in bed waiting for sleep to take them over. It’s a nice thought when you think about it carefully, because it means when they’re left to their own devices, you’re the one who pops into their mind. They want to reach out and let you know about it.
In that case, go ahead and reply. [Read: 17 clear signs someone’s thinking of you and missing you]
The other explanation, and perhaps the most likely, is that the perpetrator of said message is laying in bed and they have rather impure thoughts in their mind! In this case, a late night text is the technological version of a booty call. Should you reply? That’s entirely up to you, but always be aware of the subtext!
These types of texts are far more common because it’s easier to take the rejection of a text not replied to, than actually speaking to someone and listening to their excuses or their reaction. That is why late texts are on the rise!
Learning how to respond to late night texts really depends on how you feel about the explanation around it. How sure you can be in terms of the reason behind it. If you’re sure this is innocent and you simply want to spend a few minutes batting texts back and forth before saying good night, I say go for it. It will put a smile on your face before you sleep.
However, if you’re offended by the fact that you’ve received what is likely to be the text version of a booty call, should you reply or ignore? That depends on whether you can bite your tongue or not! [Read: Mixed signals from a guy and the complete guide to interpret them]
How to respond to late night texts without caution or offense
You might wonder why you would worry about causing offense if someone is trying to get their rocks off at night and you’re the first person they thought about. Maybe you’re not sure of the reason behind it! In that case, a swift reply that won’t cause offense is the best way to side step either possible explanation without causing issues in the future.
Should you reply or not? Of course, you could leave it unread and simply pretend that you were sleeping. This is easier to do with an actual text message. In most cases, there is no way for the sender to know that you’ve read it. They may have delivery messages on their settings, which will tell them that you’ve received it, i.e. it’s delivered. They don’t know that you’ve opened it or not. [Read: 15 unwritten texting rules you need to remember]
If you’re reading a message from a social media platform, e.g. Facebook Messenger or Instagram, they will be able to see that you’ve read it. Proceed with caution if you want to ignore it and not have following up messages which are usually something along the lines of “????”. How annoying, right?
If you aren’t going to ignore it and you’re sure you want to send a message back, knowing how to reply to a late text come down to two questions. What white lie do you want to tell? [Read: Why is he texting you if he’s not interested? 15 reasons why]
If you’re not a big fan of bending the truth slightly to get out of a sticky situation, you’re probably not going to like this suggestion. But sometimes we have to do what we have to do!
You see, people send texts impulsively sometimes. In some cases you can’t retract a message once you’ve hit send. They could regret it or even be drunk, so you can’t paint them as someone who’s scouting for evening time fun without really knowing the facts. That’s why bending the truth and getting out of the situation is a lot easier.
Personally, I would say something like “Hey, I’m just about to go to bed, so tired! Hope you’re good,” or I’d say that I’ll reply tomorrow. The chances are, if it’s a booty text, the urge will have passed the following day. You won’t hear anymore of it! [Read: 12 signs you’re just being manipulated by your booty call]
How do you want to handle your late night text?
How would you handle it? I think my suggestions straddles the line of getting out of a sticky situation with ease, and handling the feelings of someone who may not actually mean anything bad. Late night texts have many possible connotations. You cannot be sure over a text which route they’re thinking of going down.
A quick, swift rebut with a promise to talk the following day usually gets you out of the situation, and lets them off the hook, if you understood the whole thing incorrectly! [Read: Sexy, naughty texting games to have fun all night long]
You see, technology might have its major advantages, and it really has several, but it also has the power to ruin relationships and friendships too. How can you really be sure what someone means by a text? There are so many things missing: body language, tone of voice, speed of voice, etc. Side stepping is the best option by far.
[Read: 10 booty call moves that make look like true love]
So, no more wondering how to respond to late night texts. You simply bend the truth a little, side step until the next day, and see the lay of the land. No confusion or awkward text conversation when you really want to sleep!
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