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What Men Want in a Woman

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Wondering what it takes to be a great mate potential for any man you like? Good looks, you say? Well, you’ll be surprised. Find out what men want in a woman, really.

what do men want in a woman

Do you want to be the super woman in your man’s life? Or do you want to be the woman that all men desire?

Read these ten facts on what men want in a woman and you’ll be all this and more.

Most women assume that great looks is all that matters to make a guy swoon and fall head over heels in love.

And quite frankly, most men assume the same thing too.

But there are a lot of great looking women out there, leading an unhappy life in a bad relationship.

So what do men want in a woman they’re in a relationship with if it’s not just the looks? Could there be more to a desirable woman than just looks?

Of course, there is. Find out what men really want in the woman of their dreams. [Read: Questions you shouldn't ask your man]

#1 A gorgeous woman

Now don’t get us wrong, looks are pretty high in the wishlist of things that men want in a woman. But a drop dead gorgeous woman doesn’t really have to be born with a perfectly chiseled face and body crafted by the hands of the big guy on top when he’s high.

Some of the most gorgeous women on earth are not really pretty if you look at their features, but then again, they’re gorgeous. In reality, it’s all about how comfortable you are with your own body. Wear clothes that look good on you, and make an effort to look your best when you’re with him. You could be fat or skinny, but as long as you put in an effort, you’ve got all the makings of a movie star, gorgeous!

#2 A confident woman

We can’t stress this enough, but just understanding this one pointer can change a proverbial ugly duckling into the most beautiful princess overnight. There’s nothing more beautiful in a woman than her confidence. Note this, we said confidence, not cockiness.

Confidence is such a turn on in a woman, and men are suckers for it, even if they don’t realize it themselves. Can you handle yourself well no matter where you are? Can you talk to five men at once and still hold the reins of the conversation? A confident woman is awe inspiring and to a certain extent, intimidating. If there’s anything that men want in a woman, this is it. A confident woman can be beautiful, strong, determined and everything else rolled up into one, just as long as she makes up her mind.

#3 A woman who can take control

Men love it when they’re the “man” in the relationship. They like wearing the pants and they want to feel like they have the final say. Considering their epic egos, it’s understandable they want to be the one to steer the relationship forward.

A woman who’s overly dominating could even jeopardize the relationship and make a man shrivel up where it matters. But that really doesn’t mean you should avoid taking control now and then. Men like it when a woman tells her man to sit back while she make all the decisions. Believing in each other’s capabilities is important. And when a man truly believes his woman is capable of doing anything he can do (perhaps even better), he’ll only respect her more and love her for the fact that she still wants him to take a lead in their lives together. [Read: How to better a relationship]

#4 A woman who makes her man look good

Do you make your man look good? Now we don’t mean this in an accessory or arm candy way though. Do you stand up for your man in public no matter what? A knight loves rescuing a damsel in distress, but at times, the knight would be grateful for a rescue too. Brag about him when you’re out with friends, avoid bitching about him or correcting him in front of other people, and let him do the same for you.

#5 An independent woman

While a relationship is about bonding and spending time together, it’s also a lot more about growing as individuals. Become a better person every single day, and help him along the path too. Spend some time by yourselves or with your own friends, and learn to give space in a relationship. Men like a woman in need, but they hate needy women. If there’s an issue you can deal with yourself, don’t ring your man and ask him to come over. In fact, he’d respect you more if you’re someone he can come to for help! [Read: How to give space in a relationship]

#6 A freak in bed

Psst… this is a quiet one, but we assure you, men love a woman who knows her moves in bed. Don’t be afraid to dominate your man in bed. That’s something men want in a woman. Have you ever caught your man staring at a hot girl doing something dirty on MTV? Gee, wonder what fascinated him so much. [Read: What men want in bed]

Most men may not be so vocal about their interests in bed, but they would absolutely love a woman who’s confident in bed. Be this woman, and he won’t be able to keep his hands off you! [Read: How to turn on a guy]

#7 A desirable woman

All men want to be with this woman, and all women want to be this woman. Have you seen her? Well, she’s inside you waiting to come out!

You may not realize this, but the secret to being a desirable woman is less about how you look and more about how you carry yourself and feel inside. Men love it when their woman can walk across a crowded hall, chitchat with a few people and become the cynosure of everyone around in an instant. Chris De Burgh had the lady in red, now who are you going to be? [Read: How to sleep with him in a sexy way]

#8 A strong and determined woman

Do you occasionally take up pet projects and leave them unfinished? Or do you make up your mind to do something in the morning and forget all about it by nightfall? A woman who’s fickle minded will not inspire anyone, nor will she be taken seriously by the people around her.

On the other hand, if you’re a woman who puts her money where her mouth is, and never backs away from a challenge, your man would be inspired by you. It’s not easy to be a determined wonder woman, but if that’s what you are, hey, you’re his new role model. And quite frankly, there’s nothing more complimenting than knowing that your man wants to be more like you, is there?

#9 A happy woman

What men want in a woman in happiness. Happiness is a great thing. It can be so refreshing and fun, and can make lives so much better.

Men love a woman who can look at the bright side of life. Of course, the man should be a happy guy too. Can you get along with his family happily without really throwing a hissy fit? Would you welcome your man back home with a happy smile when he’s been out with his friends on his fortnightly boys’ night out?

Men love a cheerful, happy woman who can bring the fresh, citrusy sunshine into their lives. Boys are burly, girls are sugar and spice and everything nice. Men like it just the way it sounds. Don’t change that and your man will love you for it.

#10 A woman who makes him a better man

Everyone knows why the other person in a relationship is called the better half of the relationship. It’s not an empty compliment. It’s meant to be true. Do you help your man become a better individual by helping him correct his flaws and shortcomings?

Be a good listener and understand what’s really going on in his life. Help him with his big decisions when he asks you for advice. Spend time with him and help him realize his dreams and aspirations. Make him a better man and he’ll love you, respect you, and desperately want you all his life.

What do men want in a woman?

Now that you know what men want in a woman, see where you stand and work your way to becoming the perfect woman that your man wants. But at the same time, remember that he should make an effort to be the best man he can be too. There’s no point if all the effort is one sided. If he’s not trying to be even half the man he can be, perhaps it’s time you look for a greener pasture. [Read: Is he the one for you?]

After understanding these tips on what men want in a woman, it’s pointless to be with a man who can’t love you and respect you back for the great woman that you are.


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Have your say!
  • abb
    July 15, 2011 | Permalink |

    Hm while i agree with some points, this list is just really impossible to attain. Beautiful, smart, emotionally secure, financially independent..oh i know where ive seen these women exist.

    In the movies.

  • Richard
    August 2, 2011 | Permalink |

    This is exactly what every single man wants. Of course, it’s almost impossible to attain, but it’s not unachievable!

    It’s really stupid when girls say they want a guy who’s got the whole package, and yet, they can’t compromise and better themselves to be the best woman they can be. Like the comment on top, women like these exist only in movies?! Seriously?!

    I think this list is totally achievable, but the man has to be good enough too.

  • Lucy
    October 11, 2012 | Permalink |

    This list is totally achievable. I’ve got all these qualities. But then I’ve been working on bettering myself all my life. I’ve got my path to financial freedom sorted, I’ve got a good career & make good money, I’m happy confident sexy open minded adventurous sexy & kinky, my boy & I are working on our batman & cat woman outfits etc. Nobody starts off like this. You got to make a concious decision to better yourself every single day. I’ve got a list of qualities that I look at every so often and work towards. You can’t expect to attract quality when you yourself is not quality.

  • Lucy
    December 14, 2012 | Permalink |

    Maybe you should add working on your grammar to tha list Lucy.

    The list is not impossible, but I think everything starts with a girl respecting herself, and not clinging to a man. If they have their own lives, when a man come aloh he will be a complement to her life not ALL of her life.

  • Lily
    March 6, 2013 | Permalink |

    Wow Lucy II that was a nasty remark. I think that I fit these qualities as well and agree with Lucy one it’s a conscious effort to try and be better every day. It’s taken me years to know who I am and not only be comfortable but confident. Because I love myself I am happy. I’ve also noticed that I attract a lot of men but it’s been harder finding someone who is as comfortable with themselves.

  • Nikki
    March 24, 2013 | Permalink |

    I’m with Lucy 1 here, I have all those qualities and have been lucky enough to find a man who adores them and is fab himself! In fact, when I asked him what he liked most about me it was basically this list! Lucy 2 you need to work on becoming the woman you want to be for yourself, everything else will follow. I worked damn hard to become confident, successful and independent and what I found is that confidence attracted more men regardless of looks. I’d say start by working on your confidence Lucy 2, rule number 1: the word ‘impossible’ doesn’t exist!

    Oh yeah, and support other women instead of putting them down. It’s just a nicer way to be.

  • Peter
    May 7, 2013 | Permalink |

    #2, #3, #5, #7, and #8 are close to being restatements of the same point. Seems a bit lopsided. There are all types of men, women, and relationships, and guess what, not all of them involve the super woman described here. If you’re not the person described here, find someone who wants the person you are.

  • Vir Verus
    May 17, 2013 | Permalink |

    A man will find himself a woman that suits him, just as a woman will find a man that suits her. Do not rely on check-lists on what to be to attract.

  • Helen
    August 3, 2013 | Permalink |

    What was first: an egg or a chicken?
    This recommended list for being a Perfect Lady/ Girlfriend is boiling down to 1 conclusion after you compare this article to the “What Do Women Want From Men in a Relationship?”: Real Perfect Lady is happy by herself – she simply does not need an everyday guy unless he is a Perfect Gentleman… but even if they by some unbelievable circumstances meet – they are Competitors for each other!
    Being Perfect has its own price to pay. Everybody has some flaws and it is better to learn about them ASAP before the real relationship started and compare Pros and Contras to decide if those Contras not just simply smaller in numbers than Pros, but if you are capable to TOLERATE them for a very long period of time!
    And if you are not perfect yourself – give him a fair chance to explore his tolerance level.
    At least you know that -x multiplied by -y = +z in math. Might work in the relationship as well!!!
    I am married a 2nd time and ended up in a foreign country with a foreign culture and moral standards – having a child from the first marriage did not make it easier either. Both of us overestimated the level of tolerance to those little flaws in each other and the second family boat almost crushed… It finally was saved by a very simple method: writing e-mails to each other truthfully stating what is annoying or hurting the feelings, but without blaming each other!
    Girls, it does work! Men are unable to listen to us – they simply shut us down, this is their nature. On the contrary, the written word has a pretty powerful effect on them! It helps to save your nerves and time. In any unhappy relationship I have ever encountered the most important issue was COMMUNICATION! We are wired differently, so, let us use the wireless technology to break the ice and warm up to each other :-)
    I found my Man!
    Good luck to all of you.

  • Rick
    January 2, 2014 | Permalink |

    I don’t need a freak in bed. If it is passionate and loving then it is great sex for me. And im not looking for a girl to be in control and i don’t want to be in control either, i want us to both be in control. Make relationship decisions together so we can both be happy. Other than that this list is for the most part correct. But again even if a woman doesn’t fit neatly into these qualities doesn’t mean i wont find her desirable. If she has confidence, is happy, and is sweet than she is the woman i want in my life. A perfectly imperfect woman is all i want

  • rubi
    January 14, 2014 | Permalink |

    I think once a woman find herself in all aspects in her life, then she becomes the real woman a man ever dreams of. They do exist but not many around, but then again to be that woman she needs to find that man. You can get something you are not, otherwise there is not balance & wont work. A balance woman and a balance man all comes with all of those points talked above.

  • Fantine
    February 17, 2014 | Permalink |

    So your screwed unless your perfect. I will be single forever because I’m am an introvert and will never be the talkative center of attention.

  • Skylark
    May 6, 2014 | Permalink |

    Not being catty and critical of other women
    would be nice too:-)
    I find being strong and having him emulate
    us is backward, #8. Confidence yes, but I want
    the guy to be in charge and not look to me to
    control him, because I won’t. Why would he want
    to be more like a woman?
    I need to respect a man and trust he can
    not look to me for guidance but partnership.
    Just my feelings. Had a great guy and he went
    back to his controlling ex. Id rather have self integrity
    and find someone who doesn’t want a Mommy/ son
    relationship more than what we had.

  • Dreamlily
    June 22, 2014 | Permalink |

    After reading that list and all the comments, male and female, I don’t see the issue mentioned here that I continuously encounter. I’m a relatively attractive 58 year old woman who is told I look like I’m in my 40′s. I have a nice figure. I’m intelligent, funny, caring, loving, compassionate, a good communicator, love sex and will do whatever it takes to keep the spice in the bedroom with my partner, and I’m extremely independent. I have been on many dates and many times I find myself refusing a second date because the guy is either too controlling or too shy and uncommunicative, or, for the obvious reason–no spark. However, for the ones I’ve dated more than once, and even in a few instances, for a couple months, we end up splitting up. The only common denominator I’ve been able to come up with is that I’m TOO independent or TOO strong willed or too strict about when I sleep with them. I don’t and won’t just hop into bed with a guy unless I have feelings for him and I’m sorry but that usually doesn’t happen after 2-3 dates! These guys seem really interested in wanting to pursue something serious with me and make it known to me early on. I usually ask them to slow down and let’s see what happens. Many times they will accuse me of not wanting to get serious but just play a dating game! It seems I can’t win! Any advice?

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