Do You Emasculate Your Man? 14 Things Women Do that Break a Man

Do you emasculate your man by accident? You may be making him feel ‘less than’ without realizing! Learn what not to do and keep his masculinity intact.

emasculate your man

As a woman and a lover, one of the things you take upon yourself is to change your man for the better. You see his flaws and his imperfections, and you want to help him improve upon them. After all, many men are diamonds in the rough that need a bit of polishing to become better versions of themselves *right?*. But, when you do this, you need to make sure you don’t accidentally emasculate your man in the process!

When you’re in a relationship, isn’t it each partner’s selfless love that helps their partner become the best they can be? That’s true to a degree, but you have to remember that if you go too far, you risk changing him beyond all recognition. That’s not the aim, is it?

Let him be who he is, but help him smooth out those rough edges in time. Don’t make him feel guilty for his character and his flaws – we all have them!

Also, remember that you’re not perfect either.

[Read: Why men feel emasculated – The 3 biggest and only reasons why]

Mutual respect in the relationship

In truth, most men feel emasculated all the time already.

If your guy starts to believe that you don’t trust him or respect him in the relationship, he’ll feel a lot more emasculated than other men.

Then, he’ll look for the first thing he can do to feel like a man again – he’ll immerse himself in his work to earn more money and feel powerful. 

Or he’ll run behind another woman who can make him feel like a man again. [Read: Why your man would cheat on you – 3 big reasons and 27 more!]

Mutual respect in a relationship plays a big part in the relationship’s longevity and the happiness both of you experience. Without respect, your relationship is doomed to fail.

After all, how would you feel if your partner constantly pulled you down, belittled you, and made you feel less than your true self? You’d leave, wouldn’t you? And rightly so!

A man always feels emasculated when his wife or girlfriend believes he’s not good enough.

Egos play a big part too. When a woman loses an ego battle, she feels controlled and restricted. And when a man loses an ego battle, he feels emasculated. [Read: How to stroke your man’s ego when he’s feeling down]

The first sign of emasculation in a relationship

How can you tell if your guy is subconsciously starting to feel small or emasculated? Well, you can see the signs just by watching the way he communicates with you.

A guy who’s feeling small or emasculated will start to communicate less openly with you. He’ll feel like he can’t say something to you because you’ll think he’s stupid, dumb or a loser. A guy can confess about many things to his girl, but if it threatens his manliness, it’s the one thing he’ll want to hide.

Men who’re emasculated by the world don’t want to appear weak. They hate having to ask for help because they believe they’ll appear weak and less manly by asking for your help. [Read: 20 secret things guys wish girls knew about guys]

14 things you say or do that emasculate your man

If you find that your husband or boyfriend is starting to communicate less about his work or the problems he’s experiencing, perhaps he feels emasculated already.

Or worse, you may be saying something to him that makes him believe you’ll judge him negatively or think he’s less of a man.

A woman may not always play a part in emasculating her man. But, if you do say or do any of these things, then chances are you’re emasculating him already! [Read: Masculine traits – 21 healthy and unhealthy manly characteristics]

1. You take over

Don’t push him aside and take over a conversation or an argument, especially because you believe he’s not arguing his case well enough. The fact that you intervened will make him believe you think he can’t stand up for himself.

2. You brag about your history

Do you brag now and then about your sexual history or his inexperience with life just to put him down? Knowing full well that he can’t compete with you?

Sex is a big part of a man’s mind. And if he knows he’s not as experienced as you, he’ll just want to go out there and notch a few more to feel man enough again. [Read: The right way to talk about past relationships with your current partner]

3. Scoff at his salary

A guy subconsciously feels like the hunter and the provider in the relationship. Scoffing at the one thing society’s convinced him is his role, i.e. earning money for the family, will definitely make him feel like he’s less of a man.

4. Tell him he’s a wimp

Don’t call your man a coward just because he couldn’t confront someone or deal with a situation. Instead, reason with him and talk about what the better action could have been. Be sure to empathize with him at the same time. [Read: How the power of words can make or break your relationship]

5. Compare him to other men in a bad light

No guy likes being compared negatively to another guy, especially by his own girlfriend or wife. Just don’t do it! It’s disrespectful and if he did the same thing to you, you’d be enraged and extremely upset.

6. You emasculate your man when you talk about his flaws

If there are flaws you need to confront, talk about them in private, and never in front of anyone else. Talking about his weaknesses in front of others will anger him and make him withdraw from you emotionally. [Read: 12 important tips to be a happy couple that’s envied by everyone else]

7. You say “I knew you wouldn’t be able to do it”

Hearing this line from a woman he loves feels like a painful low blow on his crotch. And the worst part is that he can’t even argue the case himself because he’s failed in your eyes.

8. You stare at the ceiling when he’s on top of you

You really can’t blame yourself if you don’t enjoy having sex with him. But if he stares into your eyes while both of you are locked in a passionate embrace and he sees you staring at the ceiling or yawning like you’re bored, his member will shrivel into a raisin in no time. The same goes for faking it and getting caught too! [Read: How to make long term sex or married sex feel like a one night stand]

9. You tell him you’ve seen bigger

Almost every guy knows there are other men who have bigger packages. But it’s a truth he’d rather not acknowledge or talk about. A guy wants to believe that he’s the biggest thing that’s been inside of you.

To a guy, other guys who have bigger packages is an urban legend or a myth. It’s something that may be possible but there’s no evidence to back it up. But if you ever tell him that you’ve personally had bigger ones, that’s a blow to his ego because it shatters the myth and turns it into a reality. [Read: Does size matter? – Decode your size compatibility using tips from the Kama Sutra]

10. Criticize or downplay his achievements

Does your man proudly announce his achievements to you, however small? And if he does, how do you respond to it? With a pat on his back and a big smile? Or with an “oh, don’t worry, I’m sure you can do better next time”?

Downplaying even his smallest achievements will only make him more distant from you. [Read: 18 emotional affair signs you probably didn’t notice]

11. Yelling at him

Yelling at your man is acceptable, but only if he’s a yeller himself who can argue his case. But if your guy isn’t a yeller himself, you’ll only scare him, shut him down, and make him whimper away to a corner.

12. You make him feel like a failure

You may not say anything directly to him. But for some reason or another, or by your actions, if your man starts to think he’s not good enough in your eyes, he will surely feel emasculated by that thought. [Read: Feeling like a failure – How to find your will and change your mindset]

13. Flirt with other men

Harmless flirting with other men is never bad, as long as you do it the right way. Flirt with other men when you’re at a party or a get-together, but as soon as your man steps into the room, stop. Or, tease other men but make sure you cling on to your man’s arms and give him all your attention.

Just don’t do anything that causes him to feel disrespected or used. Just watching how all the other men in the room envy him will give your guy a huge ego and a boost of masculinity! [Read: How flirting while you’re in a relationship can better your relationship]

But if you flirt with other men, and completely ignore your own man, then you’ll definitely emasculate him and infuriate him too. It’s very similar to how a guy feels when he’s cheated on by his girlfriend.

14. Telling him he’s not man enough

This is the biggest emasculation blow a man can get. Don’t ever tell your man you think he’s not man enough just because he doesn’t behave the way you think he should in a particular situation.

How to help your guy feel less emasculated

Emasculated men don’t feel unhappy. Unhappy men feel emasculated. It’s the simple truth.

If your man is happy with his life, proud of his achievements, and feels confident about his own abilities, he won’t feel emasculated even if you criticize him for not being man enough. His own ego will cushion the blow and he’ll still feel very much like the manly macho man he thinks he is. [Read: 25 compliments for guys they’ll never forget!]

Only when a man is down in the dirt and feels emasculated himself would any rude statements from you emasculate him further. So remember this, if your man feels emasculated or broken down, it’s not always your fault he feels like less of a man. But, don’t make the situation worse!

Of course, by avoiding saying things that emasculate him further and by giving him the emotional support, you can help him bounce back faster and become a better man all at once.

What you need to do is make sure that you’re not the one who’s accidentally making him feel worthless, by avoiding the things we’ve talked about so far. [Read: 20 sweet ways to make your man really happy!]

How to boost your man’s self-confidence

Here are a few ways you can boost your man’s morale and help him feel more like a man. Use these tips and he’ll be a happier guy and a better boyfriend or husband too!

1. Stop treating him like a child

Yelling at him like you would at a child will only emasculate him further. If there’s something that you want to talk about, talk to each other calmly. [Read: How to fight fair and better the relationship with each new disagreement]

2. Don’t constantly correct him

When he talks about his bad day or tells you about a mistake he committed, don’t tell him what he could have done better.

Doing this stops communication because you’re already offering a solution when he wants to talk about the situation. Just listen to him, empathize with him and offer suggestions without forcing them down his throat. He knows he screwed up, he knows there are a million things he could have done differently. Don’t make him feel worse about it.

3. Give him space

Give him some time off every week so he can go out or spend some time by himself. Help him have a social life with other men or subtly suggest he does something manly by asking him to help you fix something around the house. [Read: How to give space in a relationship and feel closer!]

4. Thank him when he offers to help

A man will feel more like a man when his woman behaves like a lady around him. Be courteous to him, and when he does something for you he considers manly, like lifting something heavy, fixing a door, or opening the lid of a tight jar, thank him and compliment his strength or his manliness at the same time.

It’ll give him the macho boost he so badly craves from you. [Read: How to be a lady – 23 classy traits that awe her man and everyone else]

5. Help him improve but make sure he thinks it’s his idea

Make suggestions for him or help him become better at something he’s already good at. Motivate him without babying him.

Every time he succeeds at something, or achieves something through your motivation, he’ll be grateful to you and feel more like a man at the same time. By doing this, you’re guiding him rather than pushing him. This makes it feel like it’s his own idea to do something, rather than you directing him all the time.

6. Communicate with each other

Open up and talk about each other’s failures and successes without being judgmental. And most importantly, empathize with your man and tell him clearly that you understand what he’s going through, and that you too would have been just as confused if you were in his place. [Read: The best ways to improve communication in a relationship]

By saying that, you’re comforting him and letting him know that it’s human to make mistakes, while offering suggestions at the same time. And no egos enter the picture here because you’re stating that you would have felt just as helpless as him if you were in his place. [Read: 25 perfect topics to talk about in a happy relationship]

Once he learns to communicate with you instead of feeling threatened or emasculated by you, he’ll only feel more confident about himself. He’ll also love you more for being the best thing to happen in his life!

[Read: 30 must-follow rules for a successful relationship]

Do you feel like you emasculate your man in some way or another? Just keep these subtle things in mind. And most importantly, help your guy feel less emasculated by communicating with him. After all, love can only get better with communication!

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Preeti Tewari Serai
Preeti Serai
Preeti, the founder of LovePanky, is an eternal optimist and believer in the beauty of love and life. With an exhaustive experience in love, relationships, and ...