24 Ways to Be a Strong Independent Woman All Men Love and Desire

Learning how to be a strong independent woman might sound difficult, but it’s not. Here are 24 ways you can be proud of yourself and stand on your own.

how to be a strong independent woman

A strong, independent woman is sexy, in charge, and knows exactly what she wants. Doesn’t that sound just like something every man wants? Well, that’s because it IS what most men want. When you become independent, you get rid of most of those insecurities that make you more unappealing.

You could probably walk down the streets in your town and, just by looking at the way a woman walks, you could tell if she’s the type who makes her own decisions, or the type who has everyone walking all over her. It’s really not hard to miss.

What makes a strong independent woman so different?

Their personalities, their no-b.s. attitude, their commanding presence, and the fact that they had to work hard to be who they are. Nothing happens overnight. You can’t just flip a switch and decide to become a bad-ass independent woman. [Read: 25 classy traits that draw men and drive them crazy]

If it were easy, most women would have done it a long time ago. But the truth is that you have to make changes in your everyday life in order to become a strong, independent woman.

Lucky for you, there are steps to getting there. Here’s how to turn yourself into an envied, strong independent woman that men love.

1. Stand up for yourself when necessary

An independent woman takes action when she feels that she has been wronged. If you really want to be a strong, independent woman that men love, you stick up for yourself in a situation that calls for it. Just remember to always keep calm and be respectful when doing so.

2. Provide for yourself

This one is taking the term ‘independent’ literally. If you want to be this type of woman, then you have to literally provide everything for yourself. You can’t rely on anyone else for money, a home, or even happiness.

If you really want men to love you, you’ll be able to provide everything you need yourself. This takes the pressure off of your guy to ‘be the man’ and provide everything because sometimes, he can’t. This lets him know that you’re not with him for his money or assets, you’re with him for him. [Read: The step-by-step guide to be independent even when you’re in a relationship]

3. Have your own life

Don’t spend all your time pining over someone or something. Have your own hobbies, goals, aspirations, and more.

Be a person in this world and not just another fly on the wall. Have your own life and you’ll become an independent woman.

4. Deal with your problems on your own

While it’s okay to ask for advice and have someone weigh in on what they think you should do, never put your problems onto someone else and make them feel like it’s their job to fix them. Your problems are only yours and you should act as such.

It’s true that men love to fix things. But this is more accurate for when the garbage disposal isn’t working and they can throw on their tool belt. No man is going to want to be the one to fix all your problems for you. [Read: 15 qualities all men crave in their woman more than anything else]

5. Ignore negative people

Haters are everywhere. They’re online, walking down the street, in the mall, and even a few cubes down from yours at work. You can never escape them. But if you want to be the kind of woman a man loves, you will learn to ignore them and not let them affect you.

6. Stay calm in a crisis situation

It’s easy it is to simply freak out when something goes wrong, but you can’t do that. Independent women can take a terrible situation and stay relaxed. They can deal with it with poise.

7. Stop being impulsive

Impulsive behavior makes you look young and immature. Real independent women take their decisions – no matter how small – seriously and think them through before taking action.

So before you spend $1000 on that fluffy throw rug on a whim, think about it.

8. Don’t let other people’s opinions affect your self-esteem

This one is a major aspect of an independent woman. Those who can ignore critical comments without letting them take down her confidence are strong in so many ways. This rule is crucial for transforming yourself into a strong, independent woman.

Men love women like this because they know they don’t have to be the ones to pick you up when your confidence wilts. Sure, they might love being someone to make you feel better, but they don’t want to carry the weight of your falling self-esteem all the time. [Read: How your self-respect affects you and the relationships in your life]

9. Work hard – harder than ever before

Independent women don’t just sit around and wait for something to be handed to them. Nope. They work harder than they should in order to achieve greatness.

This is especially true in a society that is so male-dominant in the workforce. So wake up early, leave late, and watch success fall into your lap.

10. Don’t settle

Whether it be your job or your love life, never settle for anything less than what you deserve. You deserve the best and that’s all you should have. So if you’re not happy where you are, move on. That’s the mantra of independent women everywhere.

11. Stay fit and healthy

Being an independent woman isn’t just about being mentally tough. You actually have to be physically fit and healthy.

Go to the gym, lift weights, eat real foods, and you’ll feel so much better about yourself. Not only will it help you feel better, but you’ll look like a badass too. [Read: 25 things guys find really sexy and attractive about a girl]

12. Be realistic in your life goals/relationships

Independent women know that real life isn’t like fairytales. Real-life is hard work and takes a lot of trial and error to get things right. Don’t let your fantasies take over or you’ll only end up with disappointment.

Men like a girl who doesn’t need a man to be the knight in shining armor all the time. You understand that relationships aren’t really played out how they depict them in romantic comedies. Men love that because it assures them that you know how to work for a happy relationship. [Read: 27 easy ways to be the perfect girlfriend for your man]

13. Be happy on your own

You need to learn how to be happy and fulfilled on your own before you can really be considered an independent woman. Let go of all the things that upset you, build a life you love, and be happy with what you have.

14. Know what you want – and go after it

Don’t sit there thinking “someday,” when it comes to your goals. If you want it, then go get it! Independent women don’t sit around and wait for an opportunity to come knocking at the door. They bulldoze through opportunities’ doors and take what’s theirs.

Men love women with ambition. They like to see you be passionate about something because it shows them that you’ll be able to be passionate about him, too. [Read: How to find your passion – 17 easy ways to seek it in everyday things]

15. Respect yourself

Respect yourself. It is the most important thing you need to be able to do in order to become a strong independent woman that men love. You need to respect yourself. If you have no respect for yourself, nobody else can respect you and that image is gone.

16. Change your negative patterns

We all have behavioral patterns in life that most people don’t think about. It could be that you are critical, a complainer, or a push-over. Whatever it is, it might be holding you back from being a strong, independent woman.

So, examine what some of your negative patterns are. How are they hurting you? What can you do to change them? You can’t change what you don’t recognize, so it’s important to do some self-examination. [Read: Is your negative thinking ruing your life? 20 signs and ways to cope with it]

17. Overcome your fears

Everyone has fears. It could be the fear of being alone, being rejected, or standing up for yourself. Whatever it is, fear always holds people back. When you are fearful, you are in a submissive power position.

That’s why you want to figure out what your fears are. Are they justified or are they made up in your mind? Once you have those identified, then try to overcome them.

18. Have the right viewpoint

Let’s face it – life isn’t always easy. There are always going to be ups and downs. We can’t let the downturns get to us. Well, we can, but that doesn’t make you a strong independent woman. [Read: How to be more positive – 24 steps to happy and dramatic life shift]

So, don’t have a pessimistic view of life. If you do, you act like a victim which makes you vulnerable to being dependent. Instead, change your viewpoint on life. Think of any mistakes for failures as a learning opportunity. And then, do better next time.

19. Be financially savvy

You can’t be a strong independent woman without knowing how to make, handle, and grow your own money. If your parents or school never taught you, then do your own research. Learn how to invest. Make your retirement fund grow. Invest in real estate or some other lucrative venture.

When you are financially savvy, then you won’t have a need for anyone else’s money. Sure, you can benefit from it, but you don’t need it. That’s the key right there. [Read: The lazy twentysomething’s guide to saving money]

20. Take personal responsibility

Too many people blame others for their plight in life. But think about it – no one else is living your life. You are. So, don’t point fingers at other people when things go wrong.

Instead, make lemonade out of lemons. Take your destiny into your own hands and make the most of it. Because at the end of the day, you are the only one that you can really count on.

21. Resist being controlled

When you’re a strong, independent woman, you don’t let other people control you. Whether it is your boyfriend, husband, friends, parents, or anyone else – you are your own person. You make your own decisions.

But that means you need to be a critical thinker. You can’t do things just because other people tell you to. You have to decide for yourself what is right and wrong.  [Read: Manipulative people – how to spot them and and stop playing the victim]

22. Don’t be a people-pleaser

Sure, everyone wants to be liked and loved. It’s human nature. But when you take this need to the extreme, then you become a people pleaser. And people-pleasers give away their power to other people. They’ll do anything for anyone.

That might sound nice, but when you do this, you sacrifice your own needs, wants, and happiness. And strong independent women don’t do that. They are not doormats. Being a pushover isn’t even in their vocabulary. [Read: People pleaser – 21 signs you’re one and how to stop pleasing people]

23. Resist guilt

A lot of people try to use guilt as a manipulative tool to control others. So, you may have people in your life who try to guilt-trip you into doing things that they want you to do. But, don’t let them do that.

Step back and see the situation from a broader point of view. Recognize their tactics and refuse to play that game with them. Be your own person, and own your own feelings.

24. Don’t let other people impose expectations on you

Your parents might want you to marry a rich man, settle down, have lots of babies, and be a stay-at-home mom. But is that what you want? Or would you just be doing that to please them? Just because they have those expectations of you doesn’t mean you should do what they want.

Whether it’s your parents, your boyfriend/husband, your friends, or anyone else in your life, have your own expectations for yourself. Don’t let anyone else live your life for you. Because they will never be you. Only you know what’s best for you.

[Read: An inspiring guide to take that next step to independence and success]

Being a strong, independent woman comes naturally to some people. However, most have to work hard at achieving this. If you want to be the type of woman that a man loves, this is how.

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The editorial team of LovePanky comprises relationship experts and real-life experts that share their experiences and life lessons. If you want the best love ad...