Getting over an ex girlfriend can either be one of the easiest things you have to do in your life, or one of the hardest.
The thing is, you never truly know how hard it will be to get over an ex, until you break up.
And coming to think of it, it’s surprising how the relationships you thought wouldn’t hurt as bad if they ended, wind up hurting the most, isn’t it?
Perhaps, mutual breakups are easier on the heart.
But for most of us, breakups feel like our hearts were ripped out of our chests and then stomped on repeatedly.
For every couple that breaks up and stays friends, there are hundreds of others hurting just as bad as you are right now.
12 ways to stop thinking about your ex and get over them
Have you really tried to get over your ex?
Do their thoughts still creep into your mind through the little cracks and haunt you to no end?
Here are a few tips for everyone out there having a tough time getting over their ex.
Use these suggestions and with a little effort, you’d be able to deal with it while moving on to the next catch at the same time!
#1 Sleep with someone else. Boom! Just get right into it, no questions asked, no numbers exchanged *unless you want to*, get in, get out, clear your head. Chasing girls and living the single life can be a great experience if you are just coming out of a long-term relationship.
There’s no better way to forget an ex than to hang out around other women, and who knows, maybe the next one truly is THE ONE! [Read: Are you ready for rebound sex? 13 questions to find out]
#2 Remind yourself of all the terrible times with that person. You obviously broke up for a reason. Things were not cheerful day after day or you two would probably still be together.
Remind yourself of your last stupid argument, or the things your ex did that just really ticked you off, but you put up with it only because you were together. Well, you’re not together anymore so let that rage flow and use it as the motivation to move on. [Read: How to let go of someone you love by forcing yourself to hate them]
#3 Surround yourself with friends. Call up your friends who you have probably neglected since you got into a relationship. Grab a few drinks, head on over to the beach, watch a few football games together, just get back into being with the guys. There is nothing that helps more in taking your mind off an ex girlfriend, than chasing new girls with your buddies.
#4 Blow off some steam by going to the gym. Most people (guys and girls) get a bit complacent with their bodies when they are in a relationship. And not putting the effort into how your body looks can really toy with your self-esteem after a bad breakup.
Don’t mope around and put yourself down, get a new gym membership and start working towards that body you had in high school. It’s great motivation to get back in shape while boosting your self-esteem in the process, which is vital when you’re going out and looking to meet other women. [Read: 25 tips to get motivated to work out, and stick to it!]
#5 The no contact rule. Delete the number. Do it right now. Chances are, in this day and age, you simply type your contact’s name into your phone and hit dial. I am almost certain you don’t remember your significant other’s cell number by heart. Delete that number and do not try and contact them.
Don’t text a friend asking for your ex’s number, don’t try and email them, cut off all communication. The worst thing you could possibly do to hinder the moving on process is to call up your ex, reminisce on the good times, and be sucked right into a bad yo-yo relationship that was not working for either of you to begin with. [Read: 12 reasons why the no contact rule always works]
#6 This is real. Get closure and let your ex know that this is a real break up, not just a “break”. Do not leave the door open to getting back together. If things got bad enough to break up in the first place, it is hard to imagine a scenario where things get better instead of worse.
While we humans are usually optimistic people by nature, please realize this will most likely not end well. If you ended it once, make sure that there are no ifs, ands, or buts about the break up. It is OVER! [Read: The right way and the right reasons to take a break in your relationship]
#7 Do not try and get your stuff back. Just leave it. Obviously, if you are in your room when you break up, don’t just storm out and leave everything. But if you have left your things there for longer than two weeks, either leave them for good, or ask you ex to box it up and send it to your new address.
Don’t invite them to deliver it themselves. Instead, ask friends or even pay someone to get your things together if you have to, but avoid going back to the apartment yourself. If you step foot in that apartment, all the memories of your relationship will come back and hit you all at once, whether you want it to or not.
It’s hard enough breaking up, don’t torture yourself again with past memories that could’ve been avoided. [Read: Why breaking up first will always make it easier for you to heal]
#8 Ditch everything that is a reminder! Picture from your vacation to Hawaii? Burn it. The sweater she got you for Christmas, give it to the Salvation Army. Do away with anything that brings back strong memories of your ex. Now don’t be stupid about this either. If she happened to get you a Ford F-150, I wouldn’t exactly be taking that to the junkyard!
#9 Get busy living. Try and keep yourself busy and do something for yourself. Join a co-ed sports league to meet new friends, especially female friends who share the same love for a sport as you do. Ask your boss if you can work overtime and throw yourself into your work. Find a new hobby.
There are a million different things you could do to stay busy, and as the days turn into weeks and the weeks turn into months, before you know it, you will be ready to try the dating scene again. [Read: Break up sex with an ex and 10 circumstances where it works]
#10 Stay away from the booze, you’ll regret it. If you want to go out one night and just drink until you can’t take anymore, I’m not stopping you. That is a lot of people’s first choice after a breakup. But when that supposedly onetime thing, turns into a weekly, or worse, a nightly event, you have a whole new set of problems on your hands.
#11 Reward yourself. Are you making the right choices that are helping you move on? Do not look into the past at what you had. Instead, look into the future to plan what you want to become and what kind of woman would make the future-you happy.
Take a trip you always wanted to take. Experience something exhilarating that you never would’ve done while in a relationship like bungee jumping or skinny dipping. After being with someone for a long time, you begin to take on their characteristics. Take a few risks, try new things, and find out who YOU truly are again. [Read: 10 fun and awesome things everyone’s got to do immediately after breaking up!]
#12 Life waits for no one. Carry on with your normal activities without moping around or isolating yourself. Everyone is allowed a pout for a day or two. But when those depressed days turn into weeks, you are not only preventing yourself from moving on, but also preventing others from helping you.
The best of friends will try and cheer up a moping friend, but after trying repeatedly, day after day, even people who start off with the best intentions of helping you out through this tough time, become a bit more distant. While others can try and help, the only person who can actually decide to make a change, is the one who’s looking right back at you from the mirror!
[Read: 25 friends with benefits rules to remember for a perfect fling]
You’ve spent your share of days feeling miserable about your messed up world. Now step up and face the world. Keep these 12 ways to stop thinking of your ex girlfriend in mind, grab your jacket and get out. Seriously, there’s a whole new world waiting for you!
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