When asked what we find attractive about another person, there are many answers that come up high on the list. Time and time again, intellect is one of them. In order to truly find another person attractive, we have to find them engaging and interesting. And that’s where intellectual questions really work.
We desire lively conversations, we want to be challenged, to be able to discuss different topics, to be introduced to new things, new ideas, and new ways of thinking or looking at the world.
If you like someone, then being able to hold your own in an intellectual conversation is so important. Usually, we perceive someone to be clever if they can talk confidently on a range of different topics and have interesting answers to the questions we ask.
Of course, being able to spark an interesting conversation is important too.
Going on first dates with someone can be really nerve-wracking, and even the most confident person can get a little tongue-tied if they are feeling the pressure of meeting up with someone they really like. So why not come prepared?
43 really good intellectual questions to spark a smart conversation
If you take your time to think up lots of intellectual questions to ask your date, you make sure that the conversation won’t run out and you should be able to enjoy a fun, interesting, and lively time that both of you will really enjoy – and in doing so increase the chances of them wanting another date!
So, what intellectual questions could you talk about on your date? Let’s take a look at some of them. [Read: Instant chemistry – 25 flirty questions to ask someone you like]
#1 Politics. Politics is naturally a topic of conversation that, if you have well-thought out arguments and interesting perspectives, could spark a highly intellectual conversation between the two of you.
However, it is important to remember that you have to know what you are talking about – and be aware that your date might not share your political views, which could leave you on shaky ground.
#2 Food. Having food knowledge is something that can make you appear more intellectual. If you have interesting things to say about food, and you love to cook, then talk about that. Remember, however, if you come across as a bit of a food snob, you could put your date off! [Read: 87 fun “this or that” questions about food, sex and life]
#3 Career. Talking about your career and ambitions is certainly something that your date would want to know about, and it should be easy for you both to discuss your work and your hopes and goals for the future.
Even if your job isn’t what you want to be doing right now, explaining why you’re doing it and what steps you are going to take to move forward will prove that you want to go places in life. [Read: 12 meaningful topics that ignite intellectual conversation]
#4 Travel. Talking about travel is a great conversation starter when it comes to those early dates. Discussing the best places you’ve traveled to and your bucket list destinations shows that you have an adventurous side too.
If you want to ask more open-ended questions on your date, here are some examples of intellectual questions you could ask that will get your date to think, laugh, tell you their stories, share with you their experiences, and hopefully make you feel as if you know one another on a deeper level by the time your date has finished.
#5 What are you afraid of? Everyone has something that scares them in life!
#6 What regrets do you have? Saying your regrets will make you feel closer.
#7 If you could take three things on a desert Island what would they be? Find out what’s important to them!
#8 What do you consider to be your greatest achievement? Share your success stories.
#9 What did you love/ hate about school? Delving into childhood will let you get to know one another better.
#10 Where is the best place you have travelled? Share your amazing travel stories.
#11 Have you ever been close to death? [Read: 40 first date questions to have a great conversation]
#12 Have you ever been in an accident?
#13 What is the most embarrassing moment you have ever had? Usually, embarrassing moments are funny to us now.
#14 What is your favorite food?
#15 If you had to choose your last meal, what would it be? A shared love of food is a great place to start.
#16 If you won the lottery, what would you do with the money? Are they generous? Lavish? A cautious saver?
#17 What is your favorite room in your home?
#18 How often do you see/speak to your family? Finding out family values is so important.
#19 What is your weirdest habit? [Read: 60 get to know you questions for a new romance]
#20 Tell me a secret! Bond over secrets you’ve never shared with anyone else.
#21 Do you prefer spending time with friends or are you more of a lone wolf?
#22 When were you happiest? Getting them to focus on happy memories is a nice way to start your date!
#23 Can you tell when someone is lying? [Read: 13 giveaways if someone is lying to your face]
#24 Are you a good liar yourself?
#25 All is fair in love and war – true or false?
#26 What’s the worst fight you have ever been in?
#27 Do you believe that dreams are significant?
#28 What do you think happens to you when you die? This one is always interesting.
#29 Do you believe in miracles? It’s nice to know whether they are a dreamer or more level-headed!
#30 What is the best book you have ever read? [Read: 50 questions to check if someone’s right for you]
#31 Do you think we are designed for monogamy? Probably worth knowing!
#32 Do you believe in fate?
#33 Do you believe in Karma?
#34 What do you think you’ll be doing in ten years’ time? Find out what their plans and hopes are for the future, and then share yours too!
#35 Are you close to your family?
#36 What’s the worst lie you’ve ever told? [Read: 20 revealing questions to get to know someone better]
#37 What is your greatest achievement? Find out what they are best at.
#38 Have you ever won an award for anything?
#39 If you were a superhero what would your superpower be?
#40 Do you like to take risks? Are they an adventurous sort or do they prefer to make sensible, reasoned decisions?
#41 What inspires you? [Read: 40 questions to ask your crush to subtly flirt with them]
#42 What are you most grateful for? Talking about what you are both thankful for can make you feel deeply connected and will also spark positive feelings too.
#43 Who would you most likely to say sorry to, and for what?
These 43 intellectual questions are all great conversation starters that will help you have a lively and interesting chat, and also will make your date believe that you are a lively and interesting person too!
[Read: How to become an intellectual – Learn to fake it ’til you make it]
If you are nervous about your date, read through this list of intellectual questions to ask them and pick out the ones that you find most interesting, and think you’d like to talk about. This way, you will always have something up your sleeve if the conversation runs dry!
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