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50 Secrets & Early Signs of a Good Relationship that Make a Great One

How can you be sure whether your relationship is on the right side of the good or bad line? Learn the signs of a good relationship, that’s how.  

How to Have a Good Relationship

Every time you get into a relationship, you wonder if you’re going to have a good relationship with your lover. But what is a good relationship really?

A good relationship can’t just be found. Two people don’t just come together and complete each other like two pieces of a puzzle all at once. It has to be created.

Our lives revolve around love, be it with friends, family, or lovers. We need love in our lives to feel better and live happier. But are you in a good relationship that’ll give you the bliss and warmth that you crave for?

[Read: 38 signs of a happy, healthy relationship and what it really should look like]

Knowing what makes a good relationship is important

A happy relationship can bring a huge amount of love and happiness to your existence. And understanding what makes a good relationship helps you form healthy attachments through love.

Relationships don’t have to be perfect all the time. In fact, there is no such thing.

However, they should be a positive thing in your life. And something you are always glad you have, with a willingness to work at, because, even when times get tough, you know it’s worth it and that the person you are in a relationship with is a key part of your life.

You already know you want to have a great relationship, but what makes one? There are a lot of things that go into making a relationship good and healthy. And you have to be willing to work at that. [Read: 20 healthy expectations in a relationship that define a good love life]

What is a good relationship?

Simply put, a good relationship is a beautiful experience. It’s easy to find it but it’s even easier to overlook it.

You can spend all your life looking for true love and a good relationship, and you may never experience it even if it’s right in front of your eyes.

After all, a good relationship requires the selfless and willing effort of two lovers, and it blooms more with each passing day.

The traits and signs of a good relationship that keeps getting better!

Want to know if you’re in a good relationship? These traits and signs will lead you directly into the warm love of a healthy and good relationship that you’ve always wanted in your life.

1. You’re happy to be with your lover

In a good relationship, both partners are happy to be with each other. Good lovers complement each other and balance the relationship.

On the inside, you may truly believe that you’re a desirable and attractive person who can get anyone you want. But at the same time, do you also truly believe that your partner too has the qualities to attract anyone they want? [Read: The must-know secrets to a perfectly happy relationship]

Infatuation is fickle, but love isn’t. Most people get into a relationship and start looking out as soon as the infatuation phase is over because they assume they deserve someone better.

But in a good relationship, both partners know they’re hot stuff, they desire each other, and they also know they’re perfect for each other.

2. You argue constructively

Arguments are never bad, as long as it’s limited to a rare occasion. After all, an argument is only a sign of misunderstanding unless it results because of a bigger conflict like an affair or a lack of interest in each other.

In a good relationship, you may have differences or arguments, but it’s always constructive to the relationship. You voice your opinions and help your partner understand how you’re feeling and what you really want.

By bringing up a touchy subject and clearing the air, it helps bring both of you closer in the long run, just as long as the same mistakes don’t happen again.

And always remember this, irrespective of who started a fight, it’s the responsibility of both partners to end it as soon as possible. [Read: Relationship arguments and 23 dos and don’ts to remember]

3. You love your partner unconditionally

Lovers in good relationships are always happy. And as corny as it may sound, they feel happier when their partner’s feeling happy. Call them soulmates if you must, but in a good relationship, the happiness isn’t just one-sided.

Have you ever gone out of your way to make your partner feel good, even if it means sacrificing something for yourself?

One of the strongest signs of a good relationship is when both partners go out of their way to make their lover feel good. Do you have that unconditional love in your relationship? [Read: What is true love? 22 signs of love to know if your love is real]

4. You communicate and learn

A relationship matures over time. While your partner and you may have fallen in love at first sight and had the perfect chemistry, it takes a bit of work to retain it.

In a good relationship, both partners don’t take each other for granted. They communicate with each other and understand each other’s lives, be it personal or professional. Spend time together and learn about each other’s thoughts and ideas.

We change as individuals all the time, so make sure you know your partner for the person they are now, not what they were years ago when you first met. In a good relationship, you should be the shoulder to lean on for your partner and the voice that motivates them.

Do you really know everything about your lover? Do you motivate your partner and help them realize their dreams and aspirations? [Read: 20 small gestures that’ll leave your partner smitten and hooked]

5. You respect each other

True love isn’t enough to hold a relationship together. In a good relationship, both partners must respect each other too. In your everyday life as a couple, you have to take a lot of decisions all the time, however small they may be.

Do you make all the decisions when it comes to matters of the relationship, or does your partner do that?

If you respect each other, you’d give importance to each other’s opinions before making a decision. On the other hand, if you don’t really respect your lover, you may ask for an opinion but do what you feel is best anyways.

It may work for a while, but eventually, one partner will start to dominate the other psychologically and that can only lead to subdued or even open frustrations in the relationship. [Read: 15 strong ways to stop being taken for granted in a relationship]

6. You have a great sex life

Many say that sex is overrated. But it really isn’t. Sex is actually pretty important in a healthy romantic relationship.

If you’re not really excited by your partner sexually or if both of you have overlooked sex over the years together, you’re not a romantic couple in love anymore. You may as well be housemates or friends living together! [Read: How important is sex is a relationship? The truth revealed]

At the beginning of a relationship, you may feel a tingle of excitement rush up your spine even if your partner just touches your palms. But as the relationship gets older, even a good thrust may not bring the same hardening excitement anymore.

It’s a brutal truth that all lovers have to accept. You get used to an exciting thing, and after a while, the excitement wears off.

In a good and healthy relationship, couples actively look for ways to bring the excitement back even if it involves something outrageous or bordering on adulterous. [Read: 50 kinky ideas for a sexy relationship that are worth trying at least once]

Couples in a healthy relationship enjoy a good sex life, either through good sex in bed or by enacting fantasies, or doing something just as outrageous.

Remember, what may seem normal to someone else may seem sexually taboo to you and vice versa. Indulge in what keeps you happy, and don’t bother about what the world thinks. [Read: 30 super sexy ways to spice up your sex life starting tonight!]

7. You’re prepared to work for it

A healthy relationship requires a lot of work. If you’re passionate about your relationship and its happiness, of course, this won’t seem like work at all.

In a happy relationship, the two partners constantly look for ways to keep love alive, be it through special surprise parties or thoughtful gifts. Just like your job, you need to see progress every day in love too, if you want to experience a better relationship.

You can’t just sit back and wait for the good times to roll in love. You need to initiate it. Get away on romantic vacations and look for ways to create happy memories all the time, even if it means just watching a movie at home on the couch. [Read: 23 happy and naughty ways to keep your relationship and sex life exciting]

Have a happy outlook, be cheerful, fun, and loving. And don’t ever forget that inner young lover in you who used to get so excited to be able to spend some time with your sweetheart.

8. You stand by each other

In a healthy relationship, lovers don’t point fingers or accuse each other. They stand by each other.

Life isn’t always a bed of roses. Sometimes, you may experience a lot of happiness and at other times, both of you may have to push your way through tough times and misery. Mistakes happen, and no one in love really tries to make things take a turn for the worse, remember that.

Learn to stand together and support each other when things get tough. Sometimes, hard times are nothing but a test of love and commitment.

In a good relationship, lovers lend a shoulder instead of saying ‘I told you so.’ [Read: 33 dirty, cute and funny but real relationship goals most couples have no idea about]

9. You trust your partner

Do you trust your partner? It’s quite stupid to be naïve and completely believe your partner even if they’re caught with someone else in bed if they come up with a winding excuse. But unless you have a reason to doubt your partner or catch your partner with their pants around their ankles, learn to completely trust your lover.

In a healthy relationship, both lovers trust each other, in love and in decision making. If you respect your partner and trust them, they’ll respect you back and trust you a lot more.

Many possessive and jealous lovers accuse their partner of trying to cheat even if they just take a second glance at someone else, follow a sexy hottie on social media or if they spend an hour longer out with friends. Don’t be that lover. [Read: How to deal with jealousy in a relationship and overcome it together]

10. You genuinely love your partner

Of all of the signs and traits that make up a good relationship, this is the most simplest and yet, the most important. Do you really love your partner?

Healthy relationships are built on love and the passion to be by each other’s side. You may experience all the factors of a healthy relationship, but do you truly think you’ve found your soulmate in your partner?

When you genuinely love your partner, you can’t imagine a life without them. It doesn’t mean you’re helpless without them, nor does it mean you need them to complete you. But somehow, having their love in your life makes you feel more stronger, and happier.

Always remember this, in a healthy relationship you shouldn’t need your partner, you should want them [Read: How to be happy in a relationship all the time]

11. You compromise with each other

A relationship consists of two people, we know, shocking news. But many people forget this and assume their opinion is the only one that matters.

A sign of a good relationship is if you’re able to compromise with your partner and meet each other halfway. [Read: How to compromise in a relationship and not feel like you lost out]

12. You feel yourself around them

On first dates, we’re all nervous wrecks, but after you see the person a couple of times, you relax a bit. This is a crucial sign that you feel you can be yourself around them. If date after date, you notice you’re always tense and nervous; maybe this isn’t the person for you.

13. You have a good feeling about the relationship

Your gut knows. It really does. If you feel comfortable and happy around this person, this is a positive sign of a good relationship. But if you have even the smallest of feelings that something isn’t right, listen to yourself. [Read: How to know when a relationship isn’t working – the most revealing signs] 

14. You make time for each other

Today, everyone has a busy life and attempts to cram everything in. We get it. What makes a healthy relationship is that you both make an effort to spend time together.

Even when you have a busy day, you squeeze in a couple of minutes for a text or phone call to let the other person know you’re thinking of them.

15. You have similar interests

Now, people can still be in healthy relationships and enjoy different things. What makes those relationships work is that both people respect each other’s hobbies. But even people with opposing interests have things they agree on. It definitely helps if you share some similar passions.

16. It’s not just about sex

Sex is a lot of fun, but you don’t want this person only for sex. You want to hang out with them after; you want to cuddle away the day in bed.

This isn’t something you feel you need to run from after the deed is done. If your partner is quickly getting dressed and leaving after sex, there’s something missing. [Read: From crush to companion – the 12 stages of intimacy]

17. You ‘get’ their sense of humor

There’s so much in this world to cry and be angry about, and your partner should be the one person you can laugh with. Sharing the same sense of humor is really important and often gets ignored. If you laugh at the same things, it shows you’re on the same wavelength.

18. You feel comfortable talking about the past

Everyone has a past, and most of us carry some baggage; this is a part of life. If you’re in a good relationship, you feel comfortable discussing your past and opening up to this person.

You don’t feel they will judge you or use your past against you in any way. That doesn’t mean you talk about it just for the sake of it, but you know that if you have to, you’re comfortable in doing so.

19. You listen to each other

It’s not a one-way street. Though it’s a new relationship, a great sign is that your partner actively listens to you, and vice versa.

They don’t look at their phone and give one-word replies; they’re truly interested in what you have to say and give feedback. [Read: These 18 foundations of a relationship separate the good from the bad]

20. You celebrate each other’s accomplishments

Maybe they got a promotion. Instead of feeling jealous, you’re happy for them and celebrate their success. This is an important sign that you’re on their team, and vice versa. Their success is your success, and your success is their success. [Read: The rules you need to be a good partner in a relationship]

21. You have similar goals and values

Now, everyone has their own personal goals, and they don’t need to be the same as their partner’s goals. But, there are also shared goals.

For example, you want to get married and have children. Is that something your partner wants for their future? If you both hold similar values and life goals, you automatically remove a huge issue that many people have. [Read: 50 relationship questions to test your compatibility instantly]

How to make sure you have a great relationship

Often, when in relationships, we get a little off track, and that’s okay. We don’t need to throw in the towel at the first sign of things going a little wrong. However, sometimes it is a good idea to sit back, take a moment and reflect on what exactly makes a good relationship and how we can work to improve ours.

Not everyone values the same things in a relationship. Knowing what you find important and deal breakers you have and making sure your partner knows them too is a good start. That way, you stay on the same page and hopefully have a great relationship.

You already know the traits and signs of a good relationship, but what other practical things can you do to make sure that story is yours?

1. Remember the early stages

As time progresses, it’s very easy to get stuck in the same old routine and forget to appreciate one another. And we stop making an effort.

Remember the early, flirty stages, the great dates, the attention you showered on one another, the butterfly feeling. You don’t have to be like that all the time but go back there occasionally. [Read: How to bring back the romance and passion in a relationship]

2. Tell them what you want

It’s important your partner knows what you want *not just in the bedroom!*. They are not a mind reader, so just make life easier for both of you and tell them. We often assume our partner should know us so well we don’t have to verbalize our needs. That is never the case.

Open up and share what you want and need from them, so they aren’t guessing.[Read: How to communicate with your partner and end the roller coaster]

3. Be clear about your expectations

Make sure, early on, your expectations of the relationship and behavior within that are crystal clear. It’s important to make sure you are both on the same page, otherwise hurt, upset, and anger occur later down the line.

Set boundaries. Let each other know what monogamy means to you. Talk about what you expect from yourselves and each other. [Read: How to set boundaries in a relationship – 19 rules for healthy love]

4. Be honest

Keeping things from each other and lying to one another always backfires. You will probably make yourself feel really guilty too. Just keep things honest, even if it is hard or you made a mistake.

Take responsibility and talk to your partner. They are much more likely to understand bad news coming from you than someone else. [Read: Why you should tell the truth, even when it hurts]

5. Communicate your feelings

Good communication is key to any relationship. Make sure you always take the time to communicate your feelings to your partner. If you don’t, you end up feeling distant from them.

Talk about things and really comprehend. Don’t just blurt things out and expect them to understand, Ask if they have questions or need more clarity. Communication is key, but understanding is even more important.

6. Get to know your partner inside out

Make an effort to really get to know your partner and make sure they do the same to you. Doing this brings you closer together and helps you understand one another more deeply.

Just because you’ve been together a while doesn’t mean you know everything. Keep asking questions and getting to know each other. [Read: 12 questions to ask before marriage to know if they’re the one]

7. Forgive easily

People aren’t perfect, and they will make mistakes. The more forgiving and accepting you are, the better!

Your partner should always respect you, but if they did something wrong and took responsibility and are working to be better, forgiveness shouldn’t be something they need to do penance for.

8. Accept their flaws

Everyone has something that isn’t so great about them. Be it an annoying habit, baggage from an old relationship, or other insecurities. Accept your partner is flawed, and you are too.

No one is perfect. Everyone has a past. Accept theirs, or it will haunt you.

9. Listen

When you talk to your partner, don’t just go through the motions. Actually, engage with them and listen to what they say to you.

Ask questions. Pay attention. Listen to them how you expect them to listen to you.

10. Go on dates

Just because you’ve been together for a while doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go on dates anymore. Make time to go on a date at least once every week or so. You’ll appreciate the time together. [Read: 22 things to do on a date that aren’t Netflix and chill]

11. Make time for intimacy

Intimacy is what plays a big part in what makes a good relationship. Being intimate is really important, so don’t let this part slip away.

You shouldn’t become roommates when you live together. You are still a couple. Take time to cuddle, make small touches, and keep the romance alive.

12. Keep things interesting

Don’t just stay in the same tired old routine. Get creative about how you spend your time together. Try to take classes together. Go out in groups. Try new things.

13. Go on holiday together

Sometimes you need a break from your daily lives to relax and recuperate. Even if it is a staycation, take time to relax together. [Read: 10 types of vacations that create romance and bring you closer together]

14. Discuss the future

If you are in a good relationship, you probably see a future with this person. Discussing the future with your partner not only makes sure you are on the same page but also that you want the same things too!

Talking about kids, moving, and travel plans are important. If you put it off, you could be putting off a really important subject. If you aren’t on the same page in years, then you may have wasted both your time.

15. Resolve your fights or let them go

Every couple fights. It’s not necessarily a bad thing. But how you handle those disagreements is important. Either resolve your arguments or if you can’t, just accept that and let them go. [Read: The right way to fight in a relationship]

16. Accept you won’t see eye to eye on everything

You aren’t going to have the same opinion about everything. Sometimes you will get on each other’s nerves! That’s just part of being in a relationship. The sooner you accept this, the less it will bother you.

17. Apologize meaningfully

When you say sorry, don’t do it just for the sake of it. Your partner will know, and it only causes more upset.

Truly apologize when you hurt them or do something wrong and take responsibility. This is how you treat your partner with respect and have a good relationship. [Read: 28 heartfelt ways to apologize and say sorry to a lover]

18. Have some independence

A good relationship doesn’t mean living out of one another’s pockets. Do things separately. And you’ll feel healthier and have time to miss each other.

You need to maintain your individuality and confidence in yourself outside the grounds of the relationship. Make sure you are hanging out with friends, family and have hobbies of your own.

19. Admit your mistakes

If you make a mistake, the sooner you admit it, the better! Don’t be sucked into your ego. It is so easy to deny when you’ve done something wrong. It takes a lot of strength to own up to things. That is what makes you a better partner and your relationship a great one.

20. Have patience

Being patient with your partner is important. There will be times you feel frustrated, but if you bite their head off at every little thing, you’ll always be bickering. This ends up being pretty destructive. [Read: How to be patient in a relationship]

21. Be realistic

Being real about what a relationship involves and accepting that sometimes it is just hard work helps you through the tough times.

22. Be affectionate and kind to one another

A little affection and kind words really make all the difference in developing a good, healthy relationship.

23. Take care of each other

Make sure your partner feels loved and cared for. And you should feel the same from them too! [Read: 25 romantic gestures that will make your lover melt]

24. Be respectful

Respect is a huge part of any successful relationship, so make sure you have respect and feel respected by your partner.

25. Support one another

Support one another, help one another achieve what you want to achieve. Be one another’s biggest cheerleader and fan!

26. Spend meaningful time together

Quality always trumps quantity. So, make sure the time you spend together is well spent. Sitting on your phones in the same room is not the same as having a solid and meaningful conversation. [Read: How much time should couples spend together?]

27. Keep checking in

It’s easy to as that your partner feels the same just because you are happy and have no I same. Keep checking in with one another from time to time to make sure you both feel the same way.

28. Be loyal

Being in a relationship requires loyalty and trust. Be loyal to your partner and trust they will do the same.

29. Compromise

There will be times when you make sacrifices for your relationship. Good relationships involve a lot of giving, and there will be a healthy balance as long as you are not doing all the giving or all the taking. [Read: Some quick tips to make your relationship better]

The secret to having a good relationship everyone desires

It’s never too late to experience a good relationship. As long as both of you have the will to change for the better and experience the best moments of life together, you’ll experience a perfect and healthy relationship sooner than you think.

You can’t force yourself into a relationship and expect good things to come out of it. Successful relationships need compatibility and chemistry, and the signs of a good relationship mentioned here. [Read: 25 topics all happy couples need to talk about… often]

Time may fly and the first few months of infatuation may blossom into mature love, but that’s no excuse to let the excitement fade away. In a healthy relationship, the relationship may mature, but it still stays fresh and exciting all the time.

Understanding the secrets of a healthy and good relationship doesn’t require a rocket scientist’s precision or an artist’s imagination. All of us have the opportunity to experience it.

Just as long as you are willing to selflessly love your partner and look for little ways to keep love alive.

[Read: 20 things happy couples never do in a healthy relationship]

So what is a good relationship really? It’s a perfect relationship where two lovers understand each other and love each other. Remember these signs of a good relationship, and even if you don’t see all of them in your love life, work towards it. It’s way easier to achieve it than you think!

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Vinod Srinivas Serai
Vin Serai
Vin Serai is the founder of LovePanky.com, and has delved deep into the working of love and relationships for almost two decades. Having dipped his feet in almo...