41 Casual Conversation Starters to Use With a Guy to Get Him Talking

Wondering how to start a conversation with a guy without cringing? It’s not hard, you just need a few conversation starters with a guy up your sleeve. 

conversation starters with a guy

As a girl, it’s often pretty easy to get a guy’s attention; all you need to do is look at the guy you like. Yet at times, the guy you’re interested may not have noticed you yet. That means you need to be brave and learn how to start a conversation with a guy – yes, terrifying, right? However, learning a few conversation starters with a guy you like beforehand will give you the confidence to just be yourself!

A lot of the worry in this situation comes down to not knowing what to say. How do you actually get that chat started without sounding boring, or worse, weird? But you can arm yourself with these tips and just relax! [Read: How to catch a guy’s eye and attention in any circumstance and wow him]

It doesn’t always have to be the guy who makes the first move!

As girls, we always expect men to be the ones to approach us. Have you ever approached someone of the opposite sex? Knowing how to start a conversation with a guy can be overwhelming, but it gets easier when you know how.

However, you shouldn’t expect guys to make the first move all the time. After all, what happens when you deal with someone shy and awkward? A conversation with them will never happen if you wait for them to approach you.

We’re well into the 2020s and it’s perfectly okay to approach a guy first! And if you have the confidence and charm to do so, why not? He might even find it attractive that you didn’t hesitate to approach him first. [Read: How to make small talk and talk to anyone without feeling awkward]

All great relationships start with a simple approach! 

You never know, it could be what your crush is waiting for before asking you out on a date. Making the first move eliminates the missed opportunity of dealing with awkward and shy guys. Really, you’d be doing them a favor by initiating the conversation.

Lastly, it gets all the anxiety and fears out of the way. You’ll never get anywhere with your fear of rejection or fear they don’t like you back. How will you know the answers to these if you don’t start the conversation, right? [Read: 15 subtle but very effective ways to encourage a guy to make the first move on you]

How to start a conversation with a guy – The art of being subtle when using conversation starters

Conversation starters can be easy to learn, but if you come on too strong or make it way too obvious that you like a guy, you might find he starts playing hard to get with you!

If you really want to make a move on a guy and initiate a conversation with him, try to play a subtle game and don’t ever let him feel like you’re more interested in him than he is in you.

It’s a guy thing. If he thinks he can get a girl easily, he’ll take her for granted or take it so easy that it may appear like he’s uninterested.

But if you can rouse his interest in you, you can talk to him and still make him crave for your attention. [Read: How to get a man to chase you – 20 effortless ways to get him to fall hard]

The best casual conversation starters with a guy you can use

If you want to play it safe and easy, and avoid letting him know that you’re interested in him or smitten by him, use these conversation starters with a guy you like.

They may be obvious at times, but these conversation tips will still give you complete control of the conversation.

1. Have we met?

Look at the guy you like with a hint of fake recognition, walk up confidently, and use this line. “Hi, I’m sorry, but do I know you…? I feel like we’ve met somewhere, but I can’t place you in my mind…”

It’s easy, and even if the guy you like doubts your recognition and your intentions, he’d have to ask a few questions in return which will lead to several more questions to get to know if both of you do know each other. [Read: How to talk to a guy – 34 secrets to sweet talk him and get him to like you]

2. Eye contact and a flirty smile

If both of you are sitting in a room for a while, this may be the best way to warm things up. Exchange glances now and then, and look away. But don’t be aloof.

Be warm and approachable and smile now and then to let him know that you’re interested in talking to him. It’s not all about words when it comes to conversation starters with a guy, it’s also about non-verbal communication too!

And just to make it easier for him to walk up to you, leave your friends aside and walk past him or stand in an isolated space like you’re trying to make a phone call for a few minutes.

If he’s interested, he’ll definitely use the opportunity to walk up and say hello! [Read: 13 subtle and sexy eye contact flirting secrets to catch someone’s eye from afar]

3. Can you help me with this?

Make a man feel like a knight in shining armor and he’ll definitely think it’s his lucky day! Plan this step ahead, and as the guy you like walks towards you, ask him to help you with something.

It could be your heavy bags, a car breakdown, or even some help opening your car door or picking the car keys which have accidentally slid under the car.

As long as you thank him with your sweetest smile, he’ll definitely stick around to continue the conversation. [Read: Damsel in distress and why men find them so irresistible]

4. Can I use your phone?

Create an emergency and any guy will gladly stand up to help you. One of the easiest conversation starters is the phone trick.

Walk up to the guy and ask him if you can use his phone because your phone is dead. Just to make your act seem more genuine, fumble with your phone in a place where he can see you a minute before you walk up to him.

Another trick is where you pretend to look around like you lost something. And then, look around again and walk up to him, and ask him if he can give you a call because you seem to have lost your phone. Try this, and he gets your phone number as well! [Read: How to get a guy to ask you for your phone number – The subtle secrets you must know]

5. Pretend you thought he was someone else

Say something to him, followed by “Oops, I’m sorry, I thought you were someone else!” Pretend like you’re busy staring at your phone or texting someone, tap him on his shoulder, and start talking while looking at your phone. And just as he turns around, appear startled and use this line.

Apologize to him for the misunderstanding, but continue to ask him for some help by using any of the other conversation starters here, be it some help with your bags or something else. [Read: What to say to a guy you like to make him like you back]

6. Smile and beckon him to you

See a guy you like? Exchange flirty glances with him for a while, and you can also use the help of your friends to make it rather obvious that you’re interested in him.

Once you feel like he’s hooked to the staring game, walk away from your friends to a lonely spot and fiddle with your phone.

But look at him, smile, and gesture to him by curling your index finger towards you in a “come here” motion. Blush and play coy, and don’t try to be bossy. [Read: 25 ways to exude cuteness and melt any guy’s heart in seconds]

7. Would it be okay if I sit here?

This is something we hear all the time, be it on the bus, the train, or even at the airport. Use this very line as you come up to a guy and sit next to him if you want to start a conversation with a guy.

But just as you ask him the question, flash your warmest smile at him so he knows that you’re a warm and approachable person. And before you know it, he’ll try to start a conversation with you.

So far, all of these lines are the types of conversation starters with a guy that are perfect for beginners because it simply looks like you’re just being polite and not trying to flirt with him!

8. I wouldn’t do that if I were you

A perfect line to use when you see a guy while hanging out at a place you’re familiar with. Is the guy you like doing something that he may regret later?

Improvise and just use this line. He’ll continue the rest of the conversation. [Read: 15 flirting signs to instantly know if someone is interested in flirting with you]

9. How boring is this?

Or how awesome is this, or how screwed up is this! One of the best ways to start a conversation with someone is by using the circumstances around you.

Use this line if you’re sitting next to the guy you want to talk to, but are sitting too close to try exchanging glances.

Just lean towards him, and say something appropriate to no one in particular and sit back. You can turn towards him and smile if you want. He’ll do the rest. [Read: The sneakiest and sweetest ways to get any guy you like to ask you out]

10. Say “hi” and walk past him

Or just smile. This is a wonder move when it comes to talking to a guy you bump into often and feel the chemistry with, be it in the hallways or the cafeteria.

When you’re about to walk past this guy, either in a flight of stairs or a crowded hallway, look at him suddenly, say ‘hi’, and walk ahead like you did nothing wrong.

Don’t hesitate, and don’t look back or do anything else. And the next time you bump into him again, don’t say anything. Just glance towards him for a second. If he does have some feelings for you, he’ll immediately split into a broad grin, say hi, or start a conversation with you! [Read: What causes sexual tension and how exactly does it feel for both people?]

11. This is my first time here

“I’m lost.” Look clueless when you’re in a new place, either an office or any other place where there’s potential to get lost. If a guy you’re interested in is around, appear confused, walk up to him and use this line. Don’t go into explanations. Just wait.

And before you know it, the dashing knight would hold you by your hand and come to your rescue. [Read: How to get a guy to notice you and fall for you]

12. Make something fall near him

If you play this well, there’s no way he’ll think it’s a conversation starter move. As you walk past him, accidentally drop a pen or let your scrunchie drop near him. As long as he notices it, he’ll immediately pick it up for you. Flash your cutest grin and thank him for his assistance.

You can continue the conversation or just smile at him. Even if you didn’t strike a conversation the first time, you can always talk to him the next time you walk past him. After all, your little trick just gave you a well-planned introduction. [Read: Accidental text on purpose – What it is, how to use it and the best examples]

13. Entice him while shopping

This can be bold to a few, but when you’re out shopping, there’s really not much time to chat up a guy or use a conversation starter on him.

If you catch a guy glancing at you now and then, just hold up two girls’ tee shirts against you and look at yourself in the mirror.

And when the guy you’re interested in glances towards you, lift the two tee shirts higher and raise your eyebrows slightly in a questioning manner. If he wants to play along, he’ll definitely help you pick, and strike a conversation too!

And even if he doesn’t make a move to talk to you, you’ve got nothing to lose. After all, did you really just ask him for his opinion? No, you were just looking at the mirror, weren’t you?! [Read: The 30 best subtle, obvious and overly sexy flirting moves any girl can use to seduce a guy]

14. In a queue

If you’re standing in a crowded place or in a long line, brush him accidentally while picking something up. And as he turns around, look at him, smile, and apologize. You’ve set the ball in motion. All you need to do is look warm and approachable, and he’ll definitely talk.

15. Ask for the time or direction to a place

Okay, most people have their phone on them constantly and can easily check the time or the location, but perhaps your charge has gone! Your maps aren’t working! Who knows, there are a million reasons why something can stop working!

Asking someone for the time or directions to a place is a great way to get an ‘in’ and that means it’s one of the best conversation starters with a guy, for sure!

It’s also pretty innocent and if you’re not getting a vibe from him, you can easily cut your losses and move on without looking like you crashed and burned. [Read: How to start a conversation with a stranger and say all the right things]

16. Do you know …?

Ask him if he knows a particular person. You could say that you’re pretty sure he knows your best friend or maybe you think he used to work at a particular place.

Of course, you’re completely making it up but he doesn’t have to know that! He might say that he doesn’t know that person *more likely than him saying that he does* but that’s fine, because you’ve got the conversation going and from there it’s easier to carry on.

17. How do you know …?

This one is great if you’re at a party because you can ask them how they know the host. It’s easy enough to ask and it’s not going to get you into any kind of flirtatious trouble that you can’t get out of without embarrassment.

They might not know the host at all but that’s fine because you can then explain how you know them and the conversation should start to flow from there. [Read: Does playing coy actually work? How to do it and be effective AF]

18. Can I ask for your recommendation?

If you’re in a queue for a coffee shop and you’re standing next to a guy you really want to strike up a conversation with, how about asking his opinion on which drink you should order?

You could say that you’re really stuck between a toffee latte and a hot chocolate and you’re not sure. Then, ask for his recommendation if he’s been to that coffee shop before. It doesn’t only work with coffee shops, it works in delis, bars, restaurants, cafes, you name it!

19. Do you know when the next bus is?

Ah, public transport – annoying yet oh-so-helpful when you’re trying to start a chat with someone!

Using public transport is one of the best conversation starters with a guy because it’s comfortable enough to talk about and it has countless opportunities for extending the chat into other areas! [Read: How to be more confident with 12 simple daily self-love habits]

20. Just say it straight

Exchange glances with the guy for a few minutes until you know he’s interested in you too. Walk up to him when he’s alone, and just say ‘hi’ or something like “I see you’ve been watching me…”

It’s flattering and puts any guy in an awkward yet happy place. [Read: 18 things you say or do that makes guys think you’re easy to sleep with]

21. Classic accidental bump

This is another subtle move on how to start a conversation with a guy without being too obvious. Perhaps you could “accidentally” bump into his shoulder while walking or in a bar, bump into a guy while you’re about to get drinks.

Of course, you say sorry and smile, giving him an opportunity to comment something back if he’s interested too. It completely avoids you having to think of a witty conversation starter. You never know, it might be effective enough to turn into a full conversation, landing you a date invitation! [Read: Do guys like it when women make the first move on them?]

22. Work off your mutual friends

Do you actually recognize him? Is he a friend of a friend? Then why not start the conversation by asking him this. You don’t even have to be as nervous talking to him since he’s not practically a stranger to you.

This is an incentive to talk to him, more because if you share the same vibe, your mutual friend might invite him to more hangouts and parties! [Read: 20 signs he just wants to be friends even if you’re hoping for more]

23. Technological fail

Whether it’s something simple as your phone not working or your laptop malfunctioning, don’t hesitate to ask for help! Pretend to be a damsel in distress with a technological problem you can’t fathom.

Most likely, he says yes and there you go, the ice has been broken. You can now talk about whatever you want at the back of your mind!

24. Social media is your friend

If you want to learn how to start a conversation with a guy, social media is your very best friend and saving grace! If they post a picture, tweet something, or upload a story on their Instagram, you can easily comment!

This is a great way to start a conversation as it skips all the awkward and scary parts of an actual conversation. [Read: How to talk to your crush – The secrets to make them fall for you]

Want something more subtle? If this guy you like comments on any mutual friend’s post or even if you come across a random post he’s commented on, just reply to his comment. It’s subtle, it’s slow, but it will get his attention.

25. Is this seat taken?

You can be in class, on the bus, at the doctor’s office—ask him if the seat beside him is taken. It’s a very subtle yet effective way on how to start a conversation with a guy. Once you’re seated beside each other, you can talk about anything under the sun!

Just make sure to not share an awkward silence together. Go on, just talk about whatever and you’ll find that the rest will follow. [Read: How to make small talk without feeling awkward]

26. Must love dogs

You cannot fail at having a conversation about someone’s dog. This works for everyone. This is the entire logic behind why when you walk your own dog, a lot of strangers approach you because of how eye-catching your dog is!

If you see a guy walking his dog, don’t feel shy to stop and ask to pet it. This gives you an opportunity to start a conversation and develop a connection with him! You don’t even have to limit your conversation with dogs alone – it can be anything!

27. Ask about the music

If you’re at a coffee shop or bar, easily start a conversation about the song that’s currently playing. It’s a pretty safe way of starting a conversation.

Really, he’s not going to ignore your question. Also, everyone loves music so it’s an interesting starting topic to begin the conversation with. [Read: 20 very easy conversation starters you can use on a guy you bump into]

28. What’s he reading?

If you’re fond of books, this is a great line to use in bookshops and coffee shops! If you’ve always had the secret dream of potentially landing a date because of books, it’s your chance to use this line. Maybe he’s on the bus or at the airport and he’s just hanging out, reading a book.

Wait for him to look up and then ask him what book he’s reading. If he’s halfway through the book, you can even ask him what he thinks about the book so far and you can discuss your thoughts about it. [Read: 20 signs of attraction in the first conversation]

29. What’s the score?

If you’re at a pub and the game’s on, ask him what the score is. Make sure it’s a sport you’re semi-interested in or else you may have to sit with him and bear his rambling about offense and defense.

Most guys can talk about games and sports forever, so make sure it’s something you have in common! Otherwise, you might bore yourself to death.

30. Dance!

This is only if you’re at a club or house party. You can dance next to him or grab his hands playfully. This is actually a pretty common way on how to start a conversation with a guy.

You get to have fun and show your playful side at the same time *while also showing off your dancing skills!*. You should ask him his name afterward and he might buy you a drink, if he likes where the conversation is headed. [Read: 25 subtle moves to start a conversation with any guy you want to talk to]

31. Compliment him

This may sound weird to you, but don’t be shy to let him know that you like his shirt or his hair. In fact, compliments work wonders in starting a conversation, even for a stranger!

Since guys barely get any compliments regularly, giving him one would definitely grab his attention. Everyone likes to be complimented, so why not use that as a way to talk to him. [Read: 30 unique compliments for guys that will absolutely make his day]

32. Airport chatter

Wondering how to start a conversation with a guy when you’re traveling? If you’re on a train, bus, or plane, just ask him where he’s going. This is one of the most common ways on how to start a conversation with a guy when traveling.

You never know, you could be travel buddies or develop into something more! You two can exchange travel stories and maybe even contact information, right?

33. You look like…

Playing the “you look like this celebrity” isn’t a bad way to start a conversation. You just need to make sure that the celebrity is attractive.

It could even pass off as a compliment that’ll flatter him completely. Of course, don’t go overboard and say he looks like Brad Pitt when clearly he doesn’t. [Read: Clever ways to get a guy’s attention in any circumstance]

34. The weather

Are you sweating from the heatwave that just hit your town? I know it sounds lame, but the weather is a great excuse to talk to someone. Even if this is probably the lamest starter you can think of, it’s an effective way to grab a guy’s attention and just start talking.

Especially when the weather’s particularly intense, he won’t even notice that you’re just trying to start a conversation with him.

35. Tattoo

If he has an interesting tattoo and it’s visible, well, why not ask him about it? Usually, people have a story behind their tattoos, so it’s a great way on how to start a conversation with a guy.

After he reveals the story behind his tattoo, you can use that as a stepping stone for other topics. Plus, it gives you a reason to stare at him without looking creepy. [Read: Just being me: 15 unexpected things guys like about girls]

36. Send him a drink

Okay, if you do this, you’re a real girl boss, and we applaud you. If you’re at a restaurant or bar and you have glanced at each other, send him a drink. Again, we’re living in the modern dating culture and there’s no shame in buying a guy a drink!

At least, he’ll know you’re interested and maybe, just maybe, he’s interested in you too! [Read: How to make the first move on a guy – 15 really creative but sweet ways]

37. Open with a joke

Jokes will never go out of style, especially when trying to learn how to start a conversation with a guy. The best way to start a connection without making things awkward is by making them laugh.

Whether it’s a pick-up line or sarcasm, just use anything to your advantage in making them laugh! This is probably one of the most effective ways in starting a conversation. [Read: How to make someone laugh when they’re down & lighten their burden]

38. Working on anything exciting lately?

This is the perfect conversation starter when learning how to start a conversation with a guy. Especially when you’re in an office event or you’re around corporate individuals, it’s a great line to use.

This question is basically an alternative to asking what they do for a living. People love talking about what excites them, so it’s perfect to use when talking to a guy!

39. Having fun?

If you’ve ever been alone at a party, then someone must’ve already used this line on you. If you notice a cute guy alone at an event or party, it’s a great question that can break the ice.

It’s a much better question than asking them how they are. Frankly, how do you answer the question, “how are you?” [Read: Life of the party – How to be noticed and loved by everyone]

40. What’s your story?

Okay, we know this seems like an intimidating conversation starter, but it works! This is best used in a bar setting. So, the next time you see a guy drinking alone in a bar, feel free to ask him what his story is.

It’s not just an effective way on how to start a conversation with a guy, but an interesting one. It’s a question that’s filled with meaning and substance.

41. This is my first time here

There’s nothing more inviting than being a lost girl *remember how guys love to help and be the hero?*. By asking this question, you’re letting him guide you around a new place, event, or whatever new situation you’re in. [Read: Drawing a blank? Try these 25 good conversation starters!]

What shouldn’t you do when using conversation starters with a guy?

Of course, it’s as much about what you shouldn’t do as it is what you should do.

1. Don’t interrupt

If he’s talking to someone or he’s on the phone, don’t attempt to start a conversation with him. It’s just bad timing!

2. Don’t be rude

You might think you’re just being confident but sometimes it comes over as rude. Be yourself, that’s the single best piece of advice. [Read: Stop the craziness in life – How to deal with rude people]

3. Don’t make it completely obvious

Yes, you’re trying to start a conversation so you can flirt it up but don’t make it totally obvious from the get-go! He’d be put off immediately unless he’s already smitten by you.

4. Don’t forget to check if they’re with someone

You have no true way of knowing whether someone has a partner already when you’re trying to start a conversation but you can check if they’re with someone first.

If they’re with someone in the cafe, shop, bus stop, or anywhere else, it’s a good idea to wait it out. Sure, they might not be together, but you don’t know that and stepping on someone else’s toes isn’t cool. [Read: The most obvious signs a guy you’re talking to already has a girlfriend]

5. Don’t let your nerves control you

It’s normal to be nervous. When you like someone or even you just like the first look of someone, your nerves are going to chime up. However, take a deep breath and don’t allow them to control you. You can do this!

Find the confidence to start a conversation with a guy

If you’re not a particularly chatty person, you might be breaking out into a sweat at the simple thought of starting a conversation, but take a deep breath and go for it! You never know, this might turn out to be the guy of your dreams!

The conversation starters we’ve just talked about will give you a place to begin and just let the chat flow from there.

[Read: 33 secrets to subtly seduce a man who’s not yet yours and hook him hard]

And there we have it, really easy conversation starters with a guy that’ll definitely work in your favor. Use these tips and you’ll see just how easy it can be to chat up any guy you like in no time!

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Preeti Tewari Serai
Preeti Serai
Preeti, the founder of LovePanky, is an eternal optimist and believer in the beauty of love and life. With an exhaustive experience in love, relationships, and ...