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42 Secrets to Be Happy Being Single & Alone and Lessons It Can Teach You

Guess what? It’s entirely possible to enjoy being alone! You don’t have to be coupled up to be content. Learn how to be happy being single right now!

How to be happy being single

Who said that being single is a bore? Are you somehow less of a person because you’re not coupled up? Of course not! If you feel that way, you need to learn how to be happy being single so you can embrace this freeing and adventurous time of your life. You can totally enjoy being single!

Just like being in a relationship has its perks, the same goes for being single. So it’s essential that you learn how to be happy being single because if not, you might not get another moment like this again.

Being single has a bad reputation

Learning how to enjoy being single is not as hard as it sounds. There is this huge misconception that being single is the worst thing you can be.

Our extended family, rom-coms, and novels constantly remind us that the sign of happiness and fulfillment in life is having a partner. Sure, a relationship can add to your life, but that is not the only way to be happy, fulfilled, or successful.

Although we are forced to dream about the perks of a relationship, there are so many perks of the single life that are often underrated and overlooked. Just learn to enjoy being single and you’ll see for yourself. [Read: What people fear the most about being single]

Why should you learn how to be happy being single and alone

Many people fear being single after a break, but it’s really not as bad as people might assume. Once you’re committed to someone, you can’t just do whatever you please. You can’t go partying until the sun rises the next day or have fun with whoever.

A commitment is a serious world, and this is where being single has its perks. Of course, it’s always a massive adjustment when you just got out of a long-term relationship. However, being single can be fun, adventurous, and freeing.

Learning how to be happy being single is essential as you’re never going to get another moment in your life, so you might as well make the most out of it.

This is your chance to appreciate being alone, finding yourself, and doing all the things you’ve always wanted to do before. [Read: How to be independent and balance seeking help and being stubborn]

How to be happy being single and enjoy every single moment of it

If you want to shower, you can have one. If you’re going to spend eight days in your underwear, you can do that too, and no one will say anything.

But things are a bit different when you’re with someone. It’s no longer just about you, which, honestly, can be a hard pill to swallow when you’re used to being single.

If you’re single, don’t worry, you’ll meet someone – if you want to. But for now, enjoy every moment of having all the time in the world to focus on yourself. That is the key to understanding how to be happy being single. [Read: I have a confession – I was happier when I was single]

1. Appreciate your alone time

When you’re not at work or going out with your friends, you may be thinking that the spare time you have on your own is boring. But you’re wrong.

This is the time where you get to do whatever you want. This is the taste of freedom that you’ll never get to experience when you’re in a relationship, so better make the most of it!

Really, the world is your runway, and that’s how to be happy being single. [Read: How to make the absolute most out of your alone time]

2. Focus on the people that matter

Now is the time to invest in developing relationships that matter to you. If you don’t see your mom that often, spend more time with her. If you want to see your friends from high school, go see them. Being single isn’t about being alone.

You’re not alone, that’s what you’re not realizing.

So much love surrounds you, and it’s time you realize that. Just because you don’t have a significant other, doesn’t make the other kinds of love less real or less amazing. [Read: How to enrich your life by building real relationships]

3. Take on challenges

When we’re in a relationship, we tend to rely on the other person to help us out. But when you’re single, you have to figure out things on your own. Of course, your friends and family can help you out, but if your toilet overflows, you may not have the time to ask others for help.

This is when you get to be creative and solve challenges on your own. It’s also when you get to experience new things and learn them as well! Life is filled with moments like this, so be sure to appreciate each one while you’re still single.

4. Meet new people

Being single is great for meeting new people. When we’re in relationships, we tend to nest and spend most of our time watching Netflix, cuddled up on the couch, and eating dangerously addicting snacks.

Now, this isn’t bad, but you notice that you usually don’t have many friends left if this has happened to you.

So expand your horizons and meet different people! Go to the nearest bar, attend parties and social events, and socialize with people you’ve never met! [Read: 18 honest reasons why you don’t have any friends that care about you]

5. Focus on yourself

When you have a partner and kids, they distract you, and you sometimes end up losing yourself in the process. But when you’re single, it’s all about you, which is what makes it so great.

Spend time to see what areas you need to work on. You can do everything and anything you’ve ever wanted as nobody is stopping you. [Read: How to focus on yourself – 27 ways to build your own sunshine]

6. Go on dates

You’re single, not dead. This is the time when you should be going on dates and looking at the qualities that you want in a partner. Being single doesn’t mean you need to sit at home crying about how you don’t have anyone. No way. Instead, now is the time when you should have fun in the dating scene.

You don’t have to feel sorry for yourself just because you’re single. If you want to learn how to be happy being single, get yourself out there and have fun!

That doesn’t mean you should commit to the next person you date, but simply have some fun with them and see where life takes you. [Read: 15 things to do on a first date to make your date fall for you]

7. Travel

You can travel alone, with family, or with friends. The point is that you don’t have to spend your time waiting for some guy or girl to walk by and steal your heart. Go get a plane ticket and fly somewhere new! Go experience life!

Why do you need a partner to have an adventure? Here’s the answer: you don’t.

Life is meant to be experienced, and you won’t live life fully if you just stay in one place your entire life. So travel somewhere you’ve always wanted to go, observe the culture, and even experience it for yourself! [Read: How to stay single until you’re seriously ready to mingle]

8. Be totally weird

Since when has being weird become unacceptable? If you want to learn how to be happy being single, embrace every ounce of your weirdness and awkwardness, as it’s probably one of the adorable quirks your loved ones admire about you. We’re all weird, and now you should use your weirdness and show it to the world.

Do things that you want to do that you’ve never done. Of course, make sure it’s safe, but don’t limit yourself because you think it’s too weird.

9. Make mistakes

Make a lot of mistakes. You’re single, and this doesn’t mean your life is over. If anything, this is where your life begins. Okay, don’t put yourself in terribly dangerous situations, but definitely risk it sometimes.

Life is meant to be lived, regardless of the relationship status you have on Facebook.

The best lessons in life are learned by making mistakes – and we mean lots of them. Rather than being haunted by moments of “what if?” just let yourself make a couple of errors. [Read: 30 sassy traits of a feisty girl that makes her dangerously amazing]

10. Take time to heal

You may be freshly single, which means you may be feeling sad or hurt – entirely normal. This is when you give yourself self-love and time to heal. If you want to be happy being single, heal your past wounds.

If you date before you’re ready and use a rebound relationship to forget your heartbreak, you’re just projecting your baggage and issues to the next person. So if you want to learn how to be happy being single, heal first before anything else. [Read: Being single – 30 happy, inspiring quotes for singles who want to live their life]

11. Find who you are

If you want to learn how to be happy being single, it’s essential to find out who you are. We tend to lose parts of ourselves in relationships as we compromise, even if we’re being taken for granted. So lose yourself, and find yourself right back.

This is the phase of your life to focus on self-discovery, so there’s no pressure on your journey.

If you want to make lots of mistakes, do it. Nobody is holding you back, and that’s precisely how you enjoy being single. [Read: Get to know who you really are with these 8 questions]

12. Be spontaneous

Spontaneity is so freeing after being single again. Of course, being in a relationship has its perks, but you can’t do whatever you want as someone will get hurt in the process.

But if you’re single, the world is literally your runaway. You can be spontaneous and give in to all your impulses – within reason! [Read: 18 ways to become more spontaneous in life]

13. Be productive

Like focusing on yourself, productivity is the best distraction if you want to learn how to be happy being single. Especially if you just got out of a breakup, being productive is way better than dwelling on your heartbreak and crying over your lost love all the time.

Crying may be healthy, but there comes the point where you need to get up and use your broken heart to become more driven to reach your goals.

Work on your business, go on job interviews, and have a side hustle. You know what they say – success is the best revenge, right? [Read: 13 positive and productive things to do with your time in lockdown]

14. Learn to be happy on your own

If you’re happy on your own, then you can make the most out of being single. This means a single person never defines your happiness and contentment, but you define what makes you happy. So whether you’re on your own or surrounded by groups of people, you’ll still be happy.

Being single is a massive adjustment after being in a relationship, and the best way to adapt to that drastic change is to learn to be happy on your own. There’s a massive difference between being alone and lonely, and it’s time you know that difference.

15. Be the right person

Being single is about building yourself to be the right person instead of being obsessed with finding the right person. So many people make the mistake of putting unnecessary pressure on their partners to be perfect when they’re not so perfect themselves.

We’ve mentioned that part of being single is about finding yourself, which includes being the type of person you want to see in a partner. How can you attract what you want if that isn’t who you are initially [Read: Right person, wrong time? How to learn to time things right in love]

16. Go on “dates” with your friends

When in a relationship, people tend to create distance with their friends. It isn’t something we do on purpose, but when you can stay in watching Netflix with your partner over going out, you usually choose to stay in. And for some reason, we all tend to choose our partners over our friends.

Now that you are single, enjoy the variety. Make dates with friends. Do things you wouldn’t have time to do while in a relationship.

17. Own your stuff

In relationships, even the healthiest of relationships, there are things we hide or protect our partners from. Whether you hide your midnight snack behind the quinoa in the cupboard or don’t share your whimsical music taste, own that stuff.

You don’t need to impress anyone but yourself. Do what you love unapologetically. [Read: Steps to unfaking your life and love being you]

18. Spend your money, or save it

 You are independent and can make your own choices without getting permission or needing to check in with anyone, except maybe your financial advisor. So enjoy saving your money or enjoy spending it on yourself.

Relationships, although great, can absorb a lot of income. When it is just you, you have control of it all without guilt. That’s one way to enjoy being single.

19. Let go of the fairytale

This sounds harsher than we mean. Just because you are happy being single doesn’t mean you have let go of the idea of being with someone. All it means is that you don’t need that fairytale to happen in order to be happy.

It is always a possibility and you can always have hope, but instead of dreading the fact that you haven’t found your other half. Enjoy finding yourself. If you want to enjoy being single, let go of how you assume singleness “should” be. [Read: How to meet men and finally find your elusive Prince Charming]

20. Plan your future for YOU

We notice that a lot of people only plan their future, buy a house, or invest when they have a partner to share it with. But it is your life and whether you have a partner or not, it is worth you putting your best effort in.

All the things you would do or plan for if you did have a partner, you can still do for yourself and that’s a reason to enjoy being single.

21. Delete the past

When you are down on being single, you tend to dwell on the past. You think about what you did wrong or how things didn’t work out. But, when you are happy where you are, you can be grateful for the past instead of bitter.

You can delete your exes on social media, delete your online dating accounts, and just move forward. Focus on now instead of then and you’ll enjoy being single much more. [Read: How to let go of the past and be excited by the future]

22. Indulge in the things you love

No matter how great a relationship is, no two partners will love all the same things. But, when you are single you can do whatever you love and be happy doing it.

You can watch synchronized swimming or eat ice cream with ketchup. If you want to play roller derby, do it! You can fully enjoy whatever you love without any objection.

Great things you will learn from being single

If you need more reasons to smile, here are all the really good reasons to enjoy that singledom and live your life. Even if don’t find that right person, who cares, because you’ll still get to have so much fun anyway!

1. So much ‘me’ time

One of the best things about being single is the amount of time you have, to spend doing whatever it is that you love best.

You don’t have to arrange for this time or wait until your significant other is out of town – every day is full of opportunities to hang out on your own. [Read: How to take care of yourself emotionally and avoid falling apart]

2. Set your own schedule

When you are single, you also don’t need to worry about running your schedule by anyone else. Get a text mid-afternoon from a friend asking you to go for drinks after work? You can say yes without worrying about interfering with your partner’s plans.

You’ll love having the flexibility to work late, take spontaneous opportunities or change your plans completely halfway through the day without worrying about how it will affect anyone else. [Confession: I’m in a relationship, but I want to be single again!]

3. Stronger friendships

Who hasn’t experienced a friendship that fades out after a significant other joins the picture? Just because you’re not in a romantic relationship doesn’t mean that you can’t have other kinds of strong relationships!

You can take the energy and love and time that would go into a romantic relationship and place it into your friendships – having great friends there for you is totally worth it!

4. The future is wide open

When you’re in a relationship, every aspect of your future needs to be run by someone else. After all, if you’re working on a couples’ 5-10-year plan, you need to keep each other involved in any big decisions.

When you don’t have to think about someone else’s future, yours has a lot more options! There are no geographical, financial, or time limits that aren’t your own to consider.

5. Potential is everywhere

There are a lot of wonderful things about being in a long-term relationship, but once you’re committed to someone, it gets a lot less fun to check out all the good-looking people around you.

When you’re single, every single good-looking person is a potential new fling – and that’s a lot of fun! [Read: 13 physical attraction tips to look way hotter when you’re trying to get someone’s attention]

6. No forced friendships

When you’re in a relationship, you need to get along with *or at least pretend to get along with!* all of the friends that your partner has already made.

Sometimes, this is a great way to make new friends, but other times, it can be an exhausting and stressful experience!

7. Singles’ parties

We’ve heard that couples’ nights are a lot of fun – wine tastings and fancy dinners are an experience you’re missing out on. But the thing is, you’ve got the rest of your adult life to experience that – give us a friends’ night out over a large group of couples any day!

8. Stay in shape

The ‘happy weight’ you gain when you’re in a relationship isn’t just a myth – we’ve seen it happen!

When you’re single, you can love knowing that by cooking for one and wanting to look nice “just in case” you might find yourself next to a good-looking stranger. Then, you don’t have to work nearly as hard at maintaining your weight! [Read: How to look fabulous and appealing when trying to get attention]

9. Self-sufficiency

The list of things you’ll learn to do as a single person living on your own, simply because you haven’t had a significant other to ask for help, will be long and impressive.

Google is a great teacher, and once you do something once, you’ll never have to ask again. You’ll love being confident in your own ability to handle problems whenever they happen. That’s definitely one of the things you’ll learn to enjoy being single.

10. Crushes are fun

Is there anything better than the feeling of butterflies in your stomach when your handsome co-worker smiles at you in the hall, or when the guy you met at a party friends you on Facebook?

Being able to have crushes that are hopeless *or not-so-hopeless!* and getting to fall in love again and again is one of the best parts about being single! [Read: 20 signs of attraction between a guy and a girl in the first conversation]

11. Saving money

You know what’s expensive? Relationships. You might not think so, but gifts *Christmas, anniversaries, birthdays, etc.* add up fast and so do dinners out and date-night activities!

When you are single, you have way more freedom in what you choose to spend your money on, and you’ll only ever have to pay for your own admission – score!

12. Focus on your career

Sure, your job isn’t *and shouldn’t be!* everything you care about. That being said, having enough time and freedom to really push yourself in your career is an opportunity you won’t have once you’re in a relationship.

Having the freedom to work overtime or tackle advanced projects can really help boost your career – and you don’t need to worry about it taking away time or energy you could be giving your partner. [Read: Love or career – How to make the right choice]

13. You decide what’s ‘clean enough’

When you’re the only one living in your place, you get to decide how much cleaning you do, where things go, and how many days you can wear your favorite pair of jeans before they’re really too disgusting to wear again. If that’s not freedom, we don’t know what is.

14. No compromises needed

When it comes to movies, dessert, ice cream flavors or the temperature of your apartment, you don’t need to ask anyone else’s opinion!

The freedom to make your own choices without worrying about someone else’s opinion lets you put your happiness first without worrying about being selfish. [Read: 12 lines singles have to hear and bear all the time!]

15. Being confident in who you are

While all of the things we’ve listed are definitely some fantastic perks of going through this crazy part of your life solo, a lot of them are pretty shallow.

We have to say that the most important part of this extended time being single will be the chance to come to terms with who you are, improve the parts of yourself you don’t like, and gain confidence in your personal abilities, dreams, and plans.

Whether you’re newly single or permanently single, there are tons of benefits to this season of life. Once you’re in a relationship, there will be plenty of other positive experiences to have, but they’re all decidedly different than the ones you can have while you’re single.

Of course, there are downsides to being single, but there are negatives to everything! [Read: How to be confident – 28 life hacks to transform your future forever]

The benefits of learning how to be happy being single and alone

When we say you can enjoy being single, that does not mean you have to accept that you will always be single. It does not mean that is a choice you made and you can’t go back on it.

All we mean is you can be happy alone. We all know you can be happy in a relationship but it is forgotten that being single has its perks too. And, when you learn how to enjoy those perks it will be your taken friends that are jealous of you for once!

1. You don’t have to suffer through first dates

First dates, although full of potential, are mostly nightmares. They are awkward and weird and sometimes gross. When you finally enjoy being single, you can stop forcing yourself to meet people for the sake of having a partner.

You can still meet people in all other ways, but first dates will no longer be the bane of your existence. [Read: How to meet new people casually – 16 exciting ways to find a new crowd]

2. You don’t have to endure dating apps

Dating apps are often just as bad, if not worse than first dates when it comes to dating. They are full of catfish, liars, cheaters, and just losers. When we find ourselves unhappy being single, we download one of these mind-numbing apps and swipe away.

Not only can these be bad for our psyche, but instead of perking us up about dating, they make us feel like crap. Once you learn how to enjoy and be happy being single, you can delete those accounts and enjoy your freedom on Saturday night.

3. You don’t need to explain yourself

It may just be us, but we always hear our friends that are in relationships complaining about checking in with their partner. Whether they have to tell them where they are, where they are going, or who they are with, it sounds like a big responsibility.

Sure, there are benefits to it, but there are also benefits to having no one to answer to. You can flirt freely, dance with anyone, and you can have friends that you had a history with. [Read: How to stay single until you’re seriously ready to mingle]

4. You can build your confidence

When you are single, you have time to focus on yourself. You can decide what you actually want in the long run. You can decide who you want to be. And you can build up your self-esteem all on your own.

You won’t need reassurance from someone else. You can learn to rely on yourself. That way, if you do meet someone you want to date, you will be your own person. Dating can add to your life, but won’t define it.

5. You get the bed to yourself

This may be a little surface level compared to the others and the many more single-life benefits, but it is nice.

Not having a sheet hog or a snorer in bed next to you will get you the best sleep of your life. That’s one reason to enjoy being single! [Read: Sleeping together but not dating – A really good idea or a bad one?]

So, how to be happy being single and alone?

You can only appreciate being single once you release how extraordinary and freeing it can feel. You might never get another moment like this twice because once you commit to the next person, that’s it.

So appreciate the independence that comes with it, and that’s how you can enjoy being single.

[Read: 15 essential relationship tips for single women]

Now that you know how to be happy being single, it’s time that you start enjoying the benefits of singledom! Being with someone is great, but so is being single if you just realized it.

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Preeti Tewari Serai
Preeti Serai
Preeti, the founder of LovePanky, is an eternal optimist and believer in the beauty of love and life. With an exhaustive experience in love, relationships, and ...