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How to Be a Slut: Unapologetic Ways to Own Your Body and Pleasure

“Slut” has often been used to tear women down. But there’s a lot of freedom you gain when you learn how to be a slut. Should we take a page out of their book?

how to be a slut

Being labeled a slut in today’s society is not uncommon. It seems that just wearing the wrong outfit can come with a slew of comments, including many associating you with being a slut—which is just ridiculously absurd. If anything, we should all be learning how to be a slut!

Put all of those cultural ideas and societal norms out of your head and listen to us for a minute. Sluts live their life with a wonderful outlook on themselves, pleasure, and loving other people. They see the world through a judgment-free lens, pursuing their own pleasure and congratulating others for seeking theirs. It’s a beautiful way to think that can teach the rest of us a few important lessons.

[Read: Sex positive feminism – what it is and why we must embrace the movement]

What is a Slut, Anyway?

Before we tell you all the ways you can live a sluttier life yourself, let’s make sure we’re all on the same page about what a slut actually is.

Slut: a woman who has many casual sex partners.

First of all, to each their own. If someone wants to go out and have a lot of casual sex with people—go for it! As long as it’s safe, that is. [Read: 29 safe sex secrets and nasty dangers of unprotected sex most don’t know]

But have you ever wondered how ‘slut’ became the go-to buzzword in the gossip circles? It’s like one day it was just a hush-hush word, and the next, it’s everywhere— from movies to college corridors. Originally, ‘slut’ was just a jab at someone’s messy room or unkempt hair. But oh, how times have changed! Now, it’s all about judging women’s choices in the bedroom.

But here’s the plot twist: in this day and age this term is getting a major makeover. It’s no longer just a slur thrown around in whispers.

Nope, it’s becoming a badge of honor for some. Why? Because women today are rewriting the rules on how to be a slut. It’s less about the whispers behind your back and more about owning your choices, your body, and yeah, your desires too.

[Read: Being sex positive – why this matters and why you need to get on board]

So, let’s spill the tea. What does being a ‘slut’ really mean in today’s world? It’s about empowerment, baby! It’s about saying ‘see ya!’ to double standards and ‘hello!’ to living life on your own terms.

It’s a new era where being a slut isn’t about shame, it’s about embracing your sexuality, with a confident shrug off to those age-old judgments. [Read: 55 secrets & self-love habits to build confidence and realize your worth]

How to be a Slut

So if you want to go out there and embrace your inner slut, be our guest! We’ve compiled a list here identifying how to be a slut, and all the things you can do to be your best sexually-free self.

1. Wearing Revealing Clothing

People make snap judgments about others based on their clothes all the time. So if you want the world to know that you love your body, there’s no faster way than by showing it off!

Being a slut isn’t about feeling insecure or wanting to blend into the crowd invisible. It’s about being unapologetically yourself, letting yourself be as big and take up as much space as you deserve, and owning yourself.

Whatever helps you feel the most confident, whether that’s showing your cleavage, your long legs, or even just a bit of shoulder, wear it without shame. [Read: 40 secrets to look sexy, feel seductive, and unleash the inner sexiness in you]

2. Talking Openly About Sex

Why are we all so hush-hush about something that we all do? Sex is a natural thing literally every animal does, it’s just humans who have turned it into a taboo subject. But when we talk about sex, we can learn so much more, leading to healthier and more fulfilling sex lives. And who doesn’t want that?

It’s important to know the right time and place though. Is it appropriate to loudly discuss your wild sex life in great detail on a packed train? Not really.

But when you’re with your friends and you all feel comfortable sharing as little or as much as you want? That is a great place to talk openly about sex and even learn a thing or two. [Read: How to talk dirty to a guy & 36 secrets to arouse him with the sexiest words]

3. Learn the Art of Body Language

Did you know that the majority of face-to-face communication is non-verbal? That’s because the body is a damn good communicator!

Walking around with your shoulders slumped, eyes on the floor, and arms crossed over your body tells the world that you’re insecure, embarrassed, and unconfident.

But when you stand with a straight back, eyes up and engaging with the world around you, and arms hung casually by your side, you ooze confidence. And that’s what the slut game is all about, baby. [Read: Body language attraction – 58 male and female signs and how to read and use them]

4. Sexting

Maybe you’re just starting out on your journey to sexual liberation. Or maybe you live in an area that isn’t progressive enough to understand that being a slut is cool. Or maybe you just prefer getting busy with your fingers… on a keyboard!

Either way, sexting can be an amazing way to flex your sexual muscles. Whether it’s with a romantic partner, a casual date, or even a consenting stranger, sending those naughty messages can do wonders for your sex life, all from the comfort of your home. [Read: How to send nude selfies without getting into trouble]

5. Making Dirty *Sexual* Jokes

There are still some people who are shocked to hear sexual jokes. But everyone’s sense of humor is different. And let’s be honest, sometimes sex is funny!

So if a funny, but dirty, joke comes to your mind, don’t hold it back. Sexual freedom and expressing yourself fully through your sexuality is about talking *and joking* about sex candidly.

6. Openly Talk About Porn

Let’s be honest, we’ve all watched it at some point. But whether you love it or hate it, porn is an important thing to talk about!

On the one hand, women have been shamed for years for admitting to watching porn. But it’s something we all do, and it’s not something that anyone should be shamed for. That attitude just makes women feel ashamed and disgusted in themselves, thinking they’re the only ones engaging in this “depraved” act.

But on the other hand, porn is in no way realistic. There are moves and noises and body parts that just don’t look or sound like that in real life! But if we were to never talk about that fact, we would all silently walk around thinking there was something wrong with our bodies or the way we have sex because it doesn’t look like it does in porn.

And there are so many other porn-related topics that equally deserve talking about! So don’t be shy to share your opinions, because it will help at least one person. [Read: Is watching porn cheating? No but it can make or break your sex life]

7. Be Open About Birth Control

If you can’t tell, there are a lot of conversations you should be having as a self-professed slut. That’s because while there are loads of people who are embarking on this sex-positive movement, there are still those who are stuck in the olden times.

There are still people who think that the only reason someone needs to be worried about getting pregnant is if they’re having too much sex with too many different people. In actuality, there are so many other uses for birth control. That’s why it’s so important to talk about these things and share effective sexual health information.

8. Embrace Your “Number” No Matter How High It Is

There are a lot of reasons that someone could have a higher number of sexual partners that has nothing to do with them being a slut. Some people start early and have been in long-term relationships with each person, so it just seems high.

Regardless, if your number is “high” to another person’s standards, don’t take their judgments to heart. Your body is yours, and no one is in a position to hold an opinion over it. Besides, your “high” body count means you probably know more about being good in bed than they do! [Read: 22 signs he enjoys having sex with you and thinks you’re good in bed]

9. Don’t Be Afraid to Date

Imagine this: you’re in your bed on a Friday night, swiping through a dating app before your 9 PM bedtime, when someone messages you asking you on a date.

You’re single, you’re free, and you want to explore your sexuality and your body while you can, so why not? [Read: Blind date – what it is, how it works, and 26 must-know blind dating secrets]

There’s no reason why you shouldn’t make the most of your singlehood. Go on dates, date outside of your usual preferences, and learn to say “why not?”.

As long as you’re being safe and making sure no one oversteps your boundaries, dating can be a wonderful teaching experience.

10. Flirt Freely

You’re a slut, there’s no need to be shy. Turn that charm dial up to 100 and grab all the attention in the room with coy smiles, fluttering eyelashes, and flirtatious banter.

Sexual confidence knows no shame, so don’t let nerves or awkwardness hold you back from charming the socks off anyone. [Read: Flirty, bold ways to get a guy to approach you if you’re shy]

11. Express Yourself Through Any And All Means

As a slut, expressing yourself through your body can mean so many things. Whether you express yourself in the sheets or with your sex-based opinions, it’s all part of the parcel.

Makeup can be a great way to express yourself. You could highlight your sultry eyes with a dark smoky eye or sleek eyeliner, or you could bring attention to those soft cushiony lips with bold red lipstick.

Or you could experiment with wild colors and artistry on your face. Being a slut means being unapologetically you, no matter what that looks like. [Read: 34 sexy secrets to look and be hot and go from boring to irresistibly desirable]

12. Be Unapologetic About Your Pleasure

This can mean something different for everyone. If sex toys are a love of yours, walk into sex shops with pride. If you love sex, don’t hide it. And if the person you’re with isn’t giving you the pleasure that you want, speak up.

Your sex life and your pleasure are your own, so own them with pride. Don’t let judging eyes or other’s egos get in the way of your road to that big O.

13. Help Your Friends

When your friends need the down-low on getting down, be their go-to guru. With wisdom on everything from tantalizing texts to bedroom acrobatics, you should share your knowledge to help and empower other people. That’s how we break down these sex-related stigmas and learn more about our bodies and desires.

Balancing Sexual Freedom with Emotional Well-being

Alright, girl, here’s the real talk: while you’re out there living your best slutty life, don’t forget the emotional side of things. It’s all fun and games until feelings get tangled up, right? So, how do you keep riding high on the waves of sexual freedom without wiping out emotionally? Let’s dive in.

1. Self-awareness is Key

When you’re exploring your sexuality, it’s like being on a thrilling adventure—but even the most fearless explorers need a map. Understanding your emotional boundaries is crucial.

Ask yourself: What feels good not just physically, but emotionally? Do you prefer having multiple sexual partners at once or just one? Are you comfortable being exclusive and romantic with a person or are you after something more casual?

Knowing these things can save you from not only hurting yourself but breaking the hearts of other people. Remember, being isn’t just about the physical thrills; it’s about feeling good on the inside too. [Read: 25 friends with benefits rules to make sure you have a happy ending]

2. Then There’s Communication

The golden ticket in any relationship, casual or serious. Talking openly about your needs, desires, and feelings can save you a world of confusion and heartache.

It’s about being honest with yourself and your partners. Navigating the slut lifestyle means being clear about what you’re up for and what’s a no-go for you. [Read: 42 secrets to communicate better in a relationship and ways to fix a lack of it]

3. Self-care

This isn’t just bubble baths and face masks—it’s about taking care of your emotional health. It means stepping back when things feel overwhelming, and not being afraid to say ‘no’ when something doesn’t feel right. Balancing being a slut with emotional well-being is like walking a tightrope, and self-care is your safety net.

4. Maintaining Healthy Relationships

Whether they’re flings or long-term things, every connection should bring you joy, not stress. It’s about mutual respect, understanding, and not losing sight of what makes you happy.

Remember, the slut philosophy is all about empowerment—and part of that is forming connections that uplift you, not bring you down.

Your Sexuality is Yours to Explore and Enjoy

In a world where slut shaming is all too common, it’s crucial to remember that your sexuality is yours to explore and enjoy, not for others to judge. People might try to label you based on their narrow perceptions, but remember, only you define who you are.

If you’re looking to navigate the complex world of how to be a slut, use the tips above as your guide. These aren’t just tips; they’re stepping stones to owning your choices, your body, and your desires.

[Read: 31 new things to try in bed at least once with your lover]

Remember, embracing your sexuality should always be about respecting yourself and those around you. It’s a journey of self-acceptance, personal growth, and empowerment. And if being empowered, confident, and in charge of your sexual identity means knowing how to be a slut, then wear that label with pride.

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Natasha_Ivanovic
Natasha Ivanovic
Natasha Ivanovic is an intimacy, dating, and relationship writer, and the creator and author of her short stories on TheLonelySerb. She completed her first degr...
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