Maybe you went on a date with someone you like or have been waiting for the moment where you can take a friendship to the next level. And now, you have that chance to know how to commit to a relationship.
Good for you! And though you know what a relationship looks like, you have no idea how to get to that spot. Well, we’ve all been there, but now, you have someone to help you through this phase. And trust me, committing to a relationship is really the easiest part *not to scare you or anything*.
How to commit to a relationship
What’s important is that you and this person are on the same page. You cannot commit to a relationship if the other person isn’t interested. So, before you go through these steps, make sure that this person wants the same things as you when it comes to a romantic relationship.
[Read: What is commitment in a relationship – and how to know if you have it]
If not, you’re going to waste your time on something that won’t happen or last. So, let’s get started and show you how to commit to a relationship.
But as confusing as it sounds, remember that knowing how to commit to a relationship is the easy part. staying in love, well, that’s a whole different thing! [Read: 17 secret ingredients to a happy, monogamous relationship]
#1 Decide a relationship is what you want. This is what you want, right? Think about it, and don’t let your emotions get the best of you. If you want to be in a committed relationship, that’s great. If you’re hesitant and are doing this because you think this is what you need to do, take a step back and really think about what you want. [Read: Do you want a partner actually or are you just feeling lonely?]
#2 Decide how the relationship will be. Committing to a relationship is different for some people. Not everyone views commitment as monogamous, but you need to talk to your partner about it. How do the two of you view commitment? [Read: Is monogamy for you? How to know what you want and need in a relationship]
#3 Talk to your partner. Let’s assume you like each other and have made it clear that you want to be in a relationship together. If you don’t know how the person feels about you or being in a relationship, you need to sit down and talk about it with them. Then, you’ll be able to follow these tips.
#4 You include your partner in your life. Your partner isn’t someone you see on Friday nights for quick sex, then you don’t speak to them until next week. If you want to know how to commit to a relationship and let them know you’re serious, you need to make this person a part of your life.
#5 Spend time together. A relationship takes a lot of time and energy to build. Just because you commit to a relationship doesn’t mean you can go weeks without seeing them *unless you’re unable to due to work, school, etc.*. Committing to a relationship means you want to invest your time into it.
#6 Focus on their needs. In a healthy relationship between two people, they look at how to meet their partner’s needs. What does your partner need in a relationship? What do you need from a relationship? Commitment isn’t just saying you’ll be with them; it’s also about working towards making the relationship as best it can be. [Read: Understanding the characteristics of a healthy relationship and say goodbye to the shitty ones]
#7 It’s about “we.” When you’re in a committed relationship, it’s no longer you. Of course, there’s you, but now you have someone else to care for. Your partner. Now, instead of talking about what “I” want and what “I” need, you talk about “we.”
#8 You do things for the relationship. I don’t want to call them sacrifices because that means you’re giving up something out of force. But you’re doing things for the relationship because you want to. You may need to make tough choices, but the decisions you make are based on your relationship and where you want it to go. [Read: How to compromise in a relationship and not feel like you lost out]
#9 You don’t cheat on your partner. Whether it’s a polyamorous or monogamous relationship, whatever you arrange, a committed person doesn’t cheat on their partner. In polyamorous relationships, there are certain rules you agree to, and if you break those rules, you break the trust. So, cheating, in any form, is a no-no.
#10 You communicate with them. Being in a committed relationship isn’t just about having a boyfriend or girlfriend. To have a healthy relationship, you need to communicate. Commitment isn’t just about not cheating on them; it’s very layered. When you commit to someone, you’re opening up to them and showing vulnerability. [Read: How to be vulnerable in a relationship and feel closer]
#11 You’re willing to work things out. With relationships comes conflict, and this is completely normal. When two people want to be together, there’s going to be friction and disagreements. But commitment is knowing that this will happen and understanding you’ll need to work out the issues rather than walking away.
[Read: 20 sure signs you’re either totally prepared for a relationship… or not]
As you learned, the first step to know how to commit to a relationship is making the decision you want to be with them. Once you do that, you’re already on the right path.
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