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How to Date a Friend You Like

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Want to know how to date a friend? Dating a friend is tricky, but not if you play it safe and make your friend like you back even before you pop the question.

how to date a friend - dating a friend

At times, it’s inevitable to fall for a friend and want to date them.

Here’s a guide on how to date a friend that can make all the difference between a successful relationship and a failed friendship.

How to date a friend

If there’s one thing that’s natural between friends of the opposite sex, it’s affection and attraction.

This is even more true if two friends of the opposite sex share the perfect chemistry to keep the excitement alive.

Every now and then, we come across a friend we like, and the chemistry may be perfect too.

But how do you go about it and pop the question without making things uncomfortable?

Use these step-by-step tips on how to date a friend, and you’ll be able to create the attraction in love sooner than you think.

[Read: 6 easy ways to accidentally kiss a friend and get away with it]

Give your attention

One of the first steps in knowing how to date a friend is to let your friend know that you favor them and pay more attention to them than you do to anyone else.

It shows that you’re interested in knowing the person better, and at the same time, it also brings both of you closer.

But always remember this, giving your attention doesn’t necessarily mean you have to accept anything this friend says. Have your own views, but let your friend know that you take them seriously enough to give them your undivided attention. This is a first step in creating a closer bond between both of you.

Make eye contact

When it comes to knowing how to date a friend, it’s all about building the momentum up slowly. You need to make your friend wonder if there’s something going on, and yet, you should never ever make it obvious.

Look deep into your friend’s eyes when you have a conversation with them, almost like you’re mesmerized by your friend. You don’t need to make it obvious by staring hard. Instead, just smile, open your eyes and let it sparkle! It sends the right message across without really using any words.

Flirt with your friend

The two earlier tips may sound vague at first, but you do need to create the chemistry before you go a step further. If you carry off the first two steps to the tee, it’ll make it a lot easier to build the chemistry and make your friend like you back faster.

Friends don’t really flirt, unless they can look at a friend as a dating potential. So your first step in knowing how to date a friend is to warm your friend up to start flirting with you.

One of the best ways to start flirting with a friend is to smile and blush a lot. This would come naturally when you like someone, but smiling and blushing automatically creates a perfect atmosphere for flirty conversations. [Read: How to text flirt with a friend]

[Read: How to get a guy to like you]

[Read: How to get a girl to like you]

Get touchy feely

Getting someone to like you, be it a friend or a stranger, is all about playing your cards right. You can take a plunge, but there’s no going back if your crush declines your advances. So it’s always better to play it safe, send out the right signals and wait for the ball to roll downhill.

You’ve warmed your friend up and you’ve started flirting, so now it’s time to start getting touchy feely.

Don’t ever paw your friend or cling onto their arm. Be graceful in your touches, and do it only at the appropriate moment. Never linger your touch longer than required and always do it purposefully and delicately. [Read: How to flirt by touching to know the steps]

Never let things get awkward

You’ve been sending out the signals constantly, but there may be times when your friend is still not ready to reciprocate your feelings or they may not feel the chemistry to play along with your flirty moves.

If your friend even mentions in passing that you’ve been behaving weirdly or have been treating them differently, back away for a few days. Your friend may like your new behavior or even dislike it, but no matter what, you still haven’t warmed your friend up yet, so don’t accept that things have changed or that you’re falling for your friend. It’s always better to play it safe than to nip a budding romance. You may be rushing it, or perhaps not reading the signs before jumping to the next step.

Spend some alone time

If you ever find your friend alone, or if you can find a way to get some alone time, make sure you use it. Now that you’ve been flirting and getting touchy feely, your friend would obviously sense something in the air.

Your next move is to let your friend know that you’re great company and a potential date too. By spending time with your friend and flirting with each other, you’re making it very clear that you want to spend some alone-time with your friend, and that you may have more than just friends on your mind. [Read: Are you more than friends?]

But don’t ever directly ask your friend to spend time with you or go out to a café. Always look for opportunities, but never make it overly obvious that you’re up to something, or are trying to fix a date. Spending some alone-time in the hallway or even in the office or college cafeteria is perfect for starters. It’s casual, and yet, very effective. [Read: 12 smart and devious ways to see your friend naked]

Let your friend know they’re desirable

Letting your friend know they’re desirable is one of the best ways to send the right signals out without really asking them out. Don’t talk about emotions here, talk about their physical aspects. Emotional compliments can always be misunderstood as friendly compliments.

“You know, you’re so cute when you do that…”, “you look so hot today”, “I really like your shirt, you look so good in it” are all safe examples of letting a friend know you find them attractive without really getting over the top. Always keep it physical so your friend understands that you do think of them in a manner that’s more than just friends. [Read: 25 friends with benefits rules if you want to sleep with a friend]

Find an excuse to go out on a “date”

Unless you’re certain that your friend already likes you, don’t ask your friend out for a date directly. Instead of building up to a rejection, make an excuse to do something together, be it shopping or going to a flea market together. You know your friend and what they probably like doing, so use that to create an opportunity to be together.

If the guy you like knows a lot about computers, call him out of the blue on a weekend and tell him you need to buy a good set of speakers and want him to come with you. Or if the girl you like is into something unique like novels or fitness or even music, make up a good excuse to get her help for something you need to buy.

And once you’re out together, stop worrying about making an impression and just have a nice time with each other. If both of you have a lot of chemistry going on, it’s obviously going to be a great “date” full of happy, flirty memories. [Read: Questions to ask on a date]

When you’re about to say your goodbyes, mention that you had a really nice time and would love to do something like this again. The guy asks the girl out, while the girl still plays coy and hard to get, so in either case, try and get your friend to commit another weekend to be with you. [Read: What to talk about on a first date]

The time to pop the question

It’s rather obvious that there’s something more than friends in the air, especially if both of you have been going out on dates now and then. And this is the best time to come clean and let your friend know that you have more than friends in mind. Let your friend know what’s on your mind a few dates later, as long as your friend’s reciprocating and warming up to you. [Read: Best places to go on a date]

[Read: How to ask a guy out]

[Read: How to get a girl with a boyfriend]

A word of caution when it comes to knowing how to date a friend, always play it slow and be cautious. You have a lot more to lose here than when you’re trying to ask out a stranger you’ve only seen a few times. [Read: How to ask a friend out]

And there you have it, a simple guide on how to date a friend that can make all the difference between a happy ending and a sad one.


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Have your say!
  • Jon Weisberg
    October 26, 2013 | Permalink |

    This has been a very interesting article. I am in a confusing situation with a friend who I like. I have been getting mixed signals the last month where she is hot one day and cold the next. Last night I was supposed to go on a date with her, but our mutual friend tagged along last minute. We all got drunk and I made out with the girl I liked before passing out. I was very embarrassed and apologized for my behavior and she accepted it and was ok. I then told her I was attracted to her and enjoy spending time with her. She then told me she enjoys my company but that I am too “extroverted” for her to date. Some people say after asking a girl out and getting rejected to give up. However, I do really care about her and def feel amazing chemistry with her. My plan is to start backing away and being less available before asking her out in the future. What is your suggestion?

  • Myia
    April 17, 2014 | Permalink |

    There’s this guy that’s sort of a close friend to me at my school. We have the same 5th period class and we sit right by each other. We been friends for a while now and he always squeezes my sides , pokes my sides, pulls my legs and puts them in between his , he jokes around with me, makes me laugh, etc. We have a lot in common and we always help each other with our work in class. In some other classes I catch him looking at me but today it’s like I wasn’t there to him? This Monday and Tuesday he started holding my hand during class and doing his usual “squeezing my sides” stuff. Well today he totally ignored me? We was really quite in 5th period, and we had a storm drill and I was beside him and he didn’t talk to me at all he didn’t say or do anything. We got back in the class and I asked him if he was mad at me and he said no. That was the end of the conversation. When class was about over we would wait till the bell ring at the door and he would walk over to my class with me and say “bye Mia”….today he just left as quickly as possible and was avoiding me? Did I say or do anything wrong? He was being cool and normal around his other friends but he was totally ignoring me? I really like him but idk what to think now? Please help!

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