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How to Flirt with a Guy Friend & 20 Ways to Tempt Him to Date You

You can feel the sexual tension, but don’t know what to do? Here’s how to flirt with a guy friend in person, and over text, to drop all the right hints.

How to Flirt with a Guy Friend

Flirting with a guy friend is not that hard, but it is harder than you might expect. The flirting part is easy, but getting him to pick up on it is the hard part. Here are some tips on how to flirt with a guy friend subtly, in person, and over text as well!

Men can be clueless. Men that you’re friends with can be even more clueless.

Depending on how long you’ve been friends, he may not even process the thought that you could be romantically interested in him.

Although, flirting is all about the balance of attraction and subtlety, when it comes to learning how to flirt with a guy friend effectively, turn it up a notch. [Read: Big flirting signs guy friends miss all the time!]

How not to flirt with a guy friend

Firstly, there really is no wrong way to flirt with a guy friend. However, there are some go-to flirting moves that will be too subtle or plain odd on someone you already know.

1. Don’t make it seem like a joke

For instance, do not use a pickup line on a guy friend. Not only will it feel out of place, but he will probably take it as a joke. If you are sincere about your interest in this guy friend, it can hurt to be rejected, but having him not even realize that you’re flirting with him can also be harsh.

2. Do not be too forward

Flirting with a guy friend is a glancing act. You want him to get the picture. You want to feel him out to see if he is flirting back.

However, you don’t want to come on too strong because it could freak him out. [Read: What do guys think of their female friends? 15 secrets revealed]

When learning how to flirt with a guy friend, moving too fast could sabotage what could become a good thing. Most guys aren’t great with change. Making your flirtation too obvious right off the bat could chase him away. A slow burn is the most effective when trying to make a guy friend into more.

3. Don’t trash talk other girls

Letting him know you don’t like his ex or that the girl he has been eyeing is no good will not do you any favors. First of all, we’re well into the ’20s now. Let’s embrace the girl power and not bring other women down, especially for the attention of a guy, no matter how cute.

Telling your guy friend that his ex was snobby or that the girl he likes is loose will only make you look bad.

Most guys do not want to hear you being catty towards women in general. Let alone women he had feelings for. He will likely take a comment like that as an attack on his judgment or taste rather than on these girls. [Read: The biggest dating turn offs for guys that push them away from you]

4. Stay respectful

The perfect way to flirt is with mutual respect. Whether you are flirting with a guy friend to start dating or just for some friends with benefits hookups, keep respect and kindness at the forefront. [Read: How to ask a guy to be friends with benefits without getting turned down]

How to flirt with a guy friend subtly and drop all the right hints

As it was said earlier, learning how to flirt with a guy friend is about mastering subtlety and your attraction. Ease him into the idea of seeing you as more than a friend. Start with the subtle flirtations.

1. Eye contact

Eye contact may seem like a go-to for any conversation, but it is something we often overlook. When you are chatting with a guy friend you like about anything, look into his eyes. Don’t stare like a creep, but make that visual connection.

When you like someone, your eyes immediately widen when you talk to them, so just remember that you really like this guy, and your body language will do the rest!

And remember, looking into someone’s eyes, even just for three seconds, can make a big emotional impact. [Read: Prolonged eye contact when flirting – What it means and how to do it right]

2. Change up your look

This is not saying you need to color your hair or buy a new wardrobe. But if you want to flirt with a guy friend and catch his eye, do something minor to catch his attention.

Maybe toss on a lip gloss or style your hair in a new way. These are things he may not notice or mention, but some part of him will process these changes. [Read: How to look cute – 25 secrets to act cute and melt any guy’s heart]

3. Look into his interests

Maybe you connected as friends through your love of sports or The Office. Try to branch out from that. If you know he loves Star Wars, look into it.

Please don’t change who you are to suit him, but showing him you are making an effort to connect with him further will certainly say something.

4. Be confident

You may always feel comfortable around him since he is your friend after all, but showing off your unashamed goofy side is actually flirty.

Some people may think being silly around a guy friend you like would pigeonhole you into the friend zone, but being 100% yourself does the exact opposite. [Read: How to talk to a guy – 34 tips to sweet talk and make any guy desire you]

5. Invite him over

Depending on how close you are, he may have been over to your place numerous times. Now, invite him over alone.

You don’t need to jump on him when he walks through the door, but inviting him into your safe space by himself shows your trust and comfort with him. [Read: The subtle signs your guy friend is totally into you already]

How to flirt with a guy friend and make a connection

Once you have made the more subtle flirtations towards a guy friend, move on up to being a little more obvious. Subconsciously, he may be coming around to the idea that you could be more than a friend.

So, slowly making your way from friends to more than that through flirting will give him time to fully get on the same page.

1. Body language

Whether you high five or hug, amping up the physical affection is a key element to flirting with a guy friend.

Lean against him when you’re watching a show on Netflix. Brush against his arm when he says something funny. Even crossing your legs towards him is a sign of attraction. [Read: 33 sexy ways to seduce a man who’s not yet yours and make him fall hard]

2. Pull him aside

When you are in a group of friends, you shouldn’t only focus on him. But, make a point to talk to him privately. Group settings are great when you are in a stable relationship. When you are trying to flirt with a guy friend, separating those parts out is ideal.

Letting him see you away from the group will help him see you through a different lens, hopefully, a more romantic one. [Read: How to make a guy fall in love with you – 25 ways to charm him easily]

3. Compliment him

Compliments go a lot further than you might imagine. Let him know he smells good. Tell him he looks nice in that shirt. Say you’re impressed with how he handled something recently.

You don’t need to force compliments at him, but being genuine and upfront about the things you like about him will tell him you won’t reject him. [Read: 30 compliments for guys they’ll never, ever forget]

4. Ask for his help

If you want to flirt with a guy friend, you need to know that doing something together is a surefire way to grow and connect!

Ask for his help with a project like building something or even taking a drive to pick something up. Spending time figuring something out and learning together will inspire a new level in your relationship. [Read: The damsel in distress and why men find them so irresistible]

5. Be direct

When you feel you’ve hit your limit with the flirting and subtle signs, tell him how you feel. Hinting at your feelings will only do so good.

If you truly want to get a positive outcome, tell him you’re interested in him as more than a friend. [Read: How to show a guy you like him and charm him while being a real tease]

How to flirt with a guy friend over text

Flirting doesn’t just take place in person. In today’s technological world, much of the flirting that people do these days is over text.

So, here are some suggestions for how to flirt with a guy friend over text. [Read: How to flirt by touch and use subtle body language to seduce anyone]

1. Use lots of emojis

Emojis aren’t just cute, they can also serve a very specific purpose when it comes to flirting. Emojis are a way to express emotion in a nonverbal way *because you aren’t face-to-face*. They let people know how you feel without you having to say it with words.

For example, if you say something sarcastic, they might not pick up on the innuendo without putting a winky face.

So, you can start using emojis like hearts, blowing kisses, or a face with heart eyes. This will convey more than friendship. It will show you are feeling very affectionate towards him. [Read: 20 flirty emojis that’ll make you a pro texter in no time]

2. Ask personal questions

When you ask personal questions, it helps you get to know someone better. Sure, you probably know him pretty well. But when you get deeper with your questions, it creates more emotional intimacy. And that’s really important if you want to know how to flirt with a guy friend subtly.

If you are always talking to your guy friend about work, video games, school, or the latest movie you want to see, then this is not very personal at all.

Ask questions like, “Are you close to your mom?” or “Did your heart get broken when you were younger?” These questions will create a stronger bond between the two of you. [Read: How to flirt with a guy over text – Everything you ever need to know]

3. Ask if he’s a good kisser

Before you ask this question, you could start a text conversation about kissing in general. It could be something silly and funny like, “Who do you think invented French kissing? I mean, who thought it was a good idea to touch tongues with another person?” It might be a comical, fun way to set up this question. [Read: How to flirt with a friend – 18 ways to tease without being weird]

Then you can lead into questions like, “Who was the worst kisser that you ever went out with and why?” or “What makes someone a good kisser?”

Then you can segway into asking him if he is a good kisser. If he says he is, then you can tease him and say, “Oh yeah? Prove it!” or “I bet I’m better than you!” This will give him a lot of romantic ideas. [Read: What makes a man want to kiss a woman – The most important traits]

4. Get him to tell you about his relationships

Again, if you want to know how to flirt with a guy friend over text in a very subtle way, you can start broad and general. Text and ask him who was his favorite girlfriend and why. Ask him what when wrong in his relationships. Ask him who his ideal girl is and why.

You can sit a back and try to analyze whether or not you fit some of these qualities that he is talking about.

If you do, then you can slip in statements like, “Wow, that sounds like me! Apparently, I am your dream girl! Haha!” This gets him thinking about you in a non-platonic way. [Read: How to flirt with a guy subtly without really flirting at all]

5. Talk about hot celebrities

When you mention attractive people like celebrities when figuring out how to flirt with a guy friend over text, it also brings his attention toward sexuality. Ask him who he thinks the hottest celebrity is and why. And then you can share who you think is hot and why you would like to have sex with them.

The purpose of this question is just like the others. To steer the text conversation in a sexual way, but without actually coming out and personalizing it. This is an indirect way to start talking about sexual attraction and make a guy flirt with you over text. [Read: 110+ sexy and dirty questions to text a guy and seduce him slowly]

6. Call him pet names

When people use pet names with each other, it indicates emotional intimacy. If you don’t know someone very well, you will usually only call them by their given legal name.

But when you are close with a person, it is pretty common for people to come up with pet names.

Many people in romantic relationships do this, although it can be done with friends too. So, you can start a conversation by saying something like, “Hey, I think it’s time we come up with pet names for each other… don’t you think that would be cute?”

Or just think of a cute name to call him yourself. It doesn’t need to be unique. It could simply be something like “hun” or “stud” or “babe.” [Read: Cute pet names and how to pick the best kind of unique and personal pet names for a guy]

Learning how to flirt with a guy friend over text can be pretty easy. The bottom line is this: all you need to do is establish emotional intimacy and steer the conversation in a romantic and/or sexual direction without actually personalizing it. After a while, he will definitely get the hint.

On a final note, if he catches on that you are flirting with him, you should let him know that he can take his time to think about it and process this new information. Even with all the signs, it could take him a bit to catch up with you.

[Read: 15 of the sneakiest and best ways to make a guy to ask you out in no time]

Learning how to flirt with a guy friend, in person or even over text, can be relatively simple. Just take your time and be patient with him coming around to the idea of seeing you as more than a friend. Once you do that, everything just gets way easier!

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Vinod Srinivas Serai
Vin Serai
Vin Serai is the founder of LovePanky.com, and has delved deep into the working of love and relationships for almost two decades. Having dipped his feet in almo...