Whether you want to find a sugar momma or fantasize about dating older women, here is everything you need to know about dating a sugar mama and where to look for one.
Having a sugar momma could be a real treat to those who are fortunate enough to find one. Having someone who can support you financially and give you all that you desire *at a small price* is basically the ultimate dream of both male and female sugar babies, right?
Lots of guys are interested in dating older women. If you are looking for a sexy older lady to treat you right, there are certain things you need to do to bag yourself an ideal sugar momma.
Older women on the lookout for younger men expect certain qualities. If you hope to be wined and dined and maybe even get some free accommodation or your college fees paid off, then you must fulfill her expectations in every way.
A lot of people love the idea of a sugar momma. If it just so happens that it works out for two people to be involved with each other in a way that plays to both of their benefits and makes them both happy, so be it!
What is a sugar momma, exactly?
If you have no idea what a sugar mama is, you’re probably very, very lost. Although, you’ve heard of sugar daddy dating before, right? A sugar momma is basically the same thing, but with a woman being the provider.
A sugar momma is an older woman who showers a younger man with gifts or money in exchange for sex and companionship. They usually make the first move and use their money to flirt with the younger guys and lure them in.
She might even support her sugar baby like the way a real mother treats her children. Hence the term sugar “momma.”
What does a sugar mama want?
This sounds like a great deal for the younger man, right? He gets pampered and has money and other things given to him. But what is in it for the sugar momma? Why would she want to do this instead of just keeping it all for herself? [Read: How to seduce an older woman and make your fantasy come true]
1. To mentor a young man
A sugar momma might actually enjoy molding the mind of a young man. She probably has achieved a lot in her own life and has become a monetary success.
And she might have overcome a lot of difficulties and obstacles on the way to the top of her career. It makes her feel valuable to give guidance to young sugar babies.
2. To feel desirable and sexy
Sadly, a lot of women stop feeling attractive and sexy as they get older. So, in order to recapture her youth, she hangs around and dates sugar babies who show her romantic attention. She likes having the attention of a handsome young man because it makes her feel young again.
3. To be who they truly are
Since most, if not every, sugar mamas are relatively wealthy, they have overcome a lot of social restrictions on women. And this isn’t just restricted to her career, but also sexually too.
So she wants to find sugar arrangements where she can embrace her true self and live her life however she wants. She has no interest in marriage and children, but she does want companionship and sex. [Read: How to be true to yourself and start living life on your terms]
4. To express their feminist beliefs
A lot of sugar mommas feel like they have broken the stereotypes of women. They are on an equal playing field with men, and they want to express their feminist beliefs by having a sugar baby. The sugar momma-sugar baby power dynamics let her be in control of the relationship.
A sugar momma probably isn’t looking for marriage or children, which is exactly why seeking sugar babies fits her needs perfectly. But just because she doesn’t want a husband doesn’t mean she doesn’t want companionship.
A sugar momma is looking for a sugar relationship to have a handsome young man on her arm to be her escort wherever she wants to go.
And then there’s sex. Sure, there are probably some sugar mommas who just like the companionship. But most of them like to have sex with their hot little sugar babies.
It’s not common for an older woman to be able to sleep with a young man, and so they embrace the opportunity to do this. [Read: Score a MILF – secrets to pick her up and hook up with an older woman]
What is a cougar/cub relationship?
You might think that being a cougar is the same as being a sugar momma. But they’re not exactly the same. Sure, the cougar is the older woman, and the cub is her younger man. So, that dynamic is the same.
A cougar is typically a woman between the ages of 30 and 50 who enjoys sex with younger men. She might not intentionally set out to be with younger men, and sometimes it’s accidental. However, some do purposely set out to find younger men to have sex with. So, the cougar/cub relationship is purely sexual.
However, a sugar momma is a rich older woman of any age who gives gifts and money to younger men in return for sexual favors and companionship.
So, the main difference between the cougar/cub and sugar momma/baby relationships is the money and gifting aspects of the relationship *or lack thereof*. [Read: Cougar women rock! Reasons why they make really good partners]
Things to know about the cougar/cub relationship
You might think it sounds fun to be in a cougar/cub relationship, but in order for it to be successful, there are some things you need to remember. Here’s what you need to know.
1. Cougars are not desperate for sex
Just because a woman is older than a guy doesn’t mean she’s desperate for sex. If she’s a relatively good-looking person, then she’s definitely not desperate. There are a lot of men she can sleep with. So, if you make her feel like she’s desperate, it will turn her off.
2. Don’t send unsolicited dick pics
Most women hate unsolicited dick pics. They find it nasty and very distasteful when they don’t even ask for them.
The problem is that a lot of guys think that women like them, but they are just plain wrong. It might turn you on, but it doesn’t turn her on. It has the opposite effect. [Read: Dick selfies – why men love sending dick pics to women]
3. Cougars aren’t desperate for company
Many cougars have a very full social life. She probably has a lot of friends who she does a lot of activities with, such as going to bars, concerts, and other social events. So, again, don’t act like you are her only source of socialization. That’s usually not true.
4. Be polite in your DMs
If you find an attractive older woman on social media, it’s okay to contact her. But since your DM is unexpected, you need to be polite. You don’t want to creep her out.
Remember, you’re a stranger to her, so she will look at you with suspicion. So, be polite and friendly; otherwise, you’ll ruin your chances with her.
Who needs to find a sugar mama?
Well, no one actually needs a sugar momma unless they are homeless and can’t support themselves. So, if a young man has his own job and can provide for himself, why would he want a sugar momma? [Read: Being a sugar baby – the sugar rules to follow to be the sugariest]
However, just because the man can support himself doesn’t mean that he doesn’t want a wealthier lifestyle. And that’s where a sugar momma comes in. She can provide that for her sugar baby.
Perhaps he needs or wants someone else to pay his college tuition, rent, or other bills. Or maybe he just likes living a lavish lifestyle, and his salary can’t provide that for himself or anyone else. Hanging around a sugar momma makes him feel rich and successful.
How much does a sugar momma pay?
According to the Sugar Daddy website, there is a wide range of how and how much a sugar baby can get paid, but there are two main ways – per visit and a monthly allowance. Here is the breakdown. [Read: How to be a good sugar baby – 16 secrets to the luxe life]
1. Per visit
In large cities, the average sugar baby gets paid $500 per visit. On the low end, it’s around $300, and for the top end of the sugar momma spectrum, the payout is more like $500-1,800. In smaller cities, the average is a little lower at $300-500.
2. Monthly allowance
Some sugar babies get paid a monthly allowance, just like a real “mother” would do for her own son. But, of course, it’s not $20 a month like for an actual child.
The average is $3,000 per month in larger cities. The low end is $2,000, and the top end is $6,000-10,000. For the smaller cities, it ranges from $1,000-5,000 with an average of $2,000.
What getting a sugar momma really means
There are a lot of different reasons why someone would seek out a sugar momma. Whether they’re simply into older women or just have expensive taste, they may want to find a sugar momma who can support them. [Read: What is a MILF? The surprising truths and thoughts behind its meaning]
Having a sugar momma isn’t all fancy cars and expensive belongings, though. There’s actually a lot more behind the relationship than just money and sex. Here’s your inside guide to what having a sugar momma really means.
1. There’s always someone to take care of you
If you’re looking to get yourself a sugar momma, then this is definitely one reason to do so. Some guys, usually those who grew up as momma’s boys, really love having someone pamper them and take care of them the way their own mother did.
The problem with this in a real relationship is that most women don’t want to treat their boyfriend like their son. Sugar mommies have no issues with this, however, and actually prefer it. [Read: Age gaps: The new trend in relationships]
2. They have needs that need to be met, too
They’ll only take care of you if you meet the needs that they have. This could be in the form of sexual favors or companionship, but whatever the terms are should be laid out and known by each party. Think of it as a kind of job, in a way. [Read: Using sex as a bargaining tool: Why it’s a terrible idea]
3. The sugar momma has the say-so
Basically, your sugar momma is acting as your dominant in this situation. It’s sugar momma’s right to tell you what she expects and that you’ll abide by all the rules she has set if you want to continue getting some of her sugar.
If you don’t follow through with her orders, you could find yourself replaced in no time. When you have a sugar momma, you become the submissive in the relationship. She is the one paying your rent, after all. [Read: How to be bossy in love without being bitchy]
4. There are rules put into place
Your sugar momma will give you rules to follow, just as stated above. The rules can be within the relationship and even outside of the relationship.
You may agree to have sexual relations only with each other, or you can both be free to see other people and maintain your sugar momma-sugar baby relationship. It all depends on the person and relationship.
5. The relationship dynamic is different from being with someone your own age
There is such a huge difference in the relationship between a sugar momma and her sugar baby versus a man and his girlfriend.
The dynamic can throw you off and cause some tension at first, just because you’re probably not used to having someone else tell you what to do and be the dominant person in a relationship. [Read: When does age difference in relationships matter]
6. The sugar momma does most of the planning
When it comes to sugar dating, you will have to do virtually nothing in terms of arranging dates or anything like that. This is where being the sugar baby is beneficial.
You’ll never have to make any plans or worry about showing how much you appreciate or care for her – that’s her job. You just sit back and do as you’re told.
7. There’s usually an adjustment period in the beginning
This can be the make-or-break period for many relationships as well. The adjustment period takes place because it’s not your typical relationship, and both parties can need some time to get used to it. [Read: New relationship doubts – 17 toxic and normal signs to read what you feel]
This is also a time when both people can feel the other out and make necessary changes to their agreement if they feel the need. After this period, the rest is smooth sailing – so long as both parties abide by their agreement.
8. Some sugar momma relationships can last years
There have been people who have had the same sugar momma for many, many years and are happy to be in that kind of relationship long-term.
They love being supported and don’t feel the desire to move on to something real. These, however, can come to an end if the sugar momma feels that her baby is getting too old for her taste and it’s time to search for a sugar baby again. [Read: How to have a long-term relationship that lasts]
9. Others can last only a few short weeks
Some relationships just aren’t meant to last, and some sugar mommies can be very particular about the type of sugar babies they want.
This means that she can go through many sugar babies in a matter of months until she finds one she wants to keep. And maybe she just likes the constant stream of new men. [Read: 15 reasons why you’re bored with your relationship]
10. The relationship isn’t meant for marriage
Sugar mommies don’t want marriage. They want someone to spoil and sleep with on a regular basis without commitment.
And usually, the sugar babies don’t want to marry someone that much older than them, either. It’s a perfect match this way, and that’s why sugar baby and sugar momma relationships can last for so long. [Read: Subtle signs of a loveless, unhappy marriage]
11. It can be more common than you think
If you go out on the town for one night, you very well may run into a few different couples that have this sugar arrangement going on, and you don’t even realize it.
Although sugar daddies tend to be more common, sugar mommies are out there running amuck and taking over young men one at a time.
How to land yourself a sugar momma
Older women looking for potential sugar babies are often referred to as cougars. These are usually smart, sexy women who take care of themselves and know what they want. They might be bored housewives, single moms, or just businesswomen who decided to put their careers first. [Read: Signs that you’re being used for sex or money]
Whatever their reason, don’t expect that just because you are a younger guy, she’ll be interested in sugar dating you. Competition for cougars is often fierce, and they can take their pick.
So, if you go on the prowl for a sugar momma, you better be up for making an effort. Bring your “A” game, and don’t be afraid to show her what kind of a man you are.
Are you ready to meet the older woman of your dreams? If so, then get ready to follow these great tips, which will set you well on your way to bagging yourself a sugar momma!
1. Dress well
Sugar mommas are classy ladies with money to spare. They want a smart and sexy younger man on their arm. You won’t get very far in a tracksuit and trainers. Dress smart, look suave, and show her that you make the effort. [Read: How to look hot – 24 sexy tips to go from boring to irresistibly desirable]
2. Go to the gym
She’s looking for a hot young thing, not a weedy ‘barely out of puberty’ type. So if you are serious about finding sugar mommas, get to the gym pronto!
3. Be confident
Confidence is so important. She wants to know you aren’t scared of an intelligent and successful woman, so no nervous chatter. It puts her right off! Instead, be a confident sugar baby. That will attract tons of potential sugar mamas.
4. Be intelligent
Sugar mommas want intelligent conversation so bring better chat than farts and beer pong! These are mature women, after all, not your frat bros.
5. Go wild in the bedroom
Let’s face it, when it gets down to the nitty-gritty, she wants to know you can deliver the goods. Make sure you are totally confident in the bedroom and show her a thing or two that she might not have experienced before! [Read: How to pleasure a woman – 16 moves that’ll work every single time]
6. Listen to her
Just like any woman, a cougar wants to feel respected and valued. Make sure you are super attentive and listen to her every word.
7. Don’t drink too much
She doesn’t want a man-child who gets stupid drunk and starts acting like an idiot. Make sure you show her that you are a proper man, can hold your booze, and don’t need to down 12 shots of tequila to have a good time!
8. Do as you are told
She’s going to enjoy bossing you around a little, so while you need to come across as manly and strong, expect to go the places she wants to go and do the things that she wants to do! [Read: 23 hacks to be a lot more attractive to women instantly]
9. Don’t expect gifts
We get that you might be wanting to date an older lady for more than just the thrill of it. If you make it too obvious that you are in it for the money, this will be off-putting to her. Don’t expect too much; wait, and good things will come.
10. Smell nice
Pay attention to your hygiene and invest in a good cologne. Then you’ll ooze sophistication, and she won’t be able to resist.
11. Don’t use cheesy pickup lines
She’ll have heard them all before! [Read: What do girls find attractive? 15 things all women love in a man]
12. Don’t be too sexual right away
If you come on too strong, she’ll find this extremely off-putting. Flatter and compliment by all means but keep the conversation light and flirty until you get to know her better *or she initiates something more*.
13. Hold your own
Hold your own in a conversation—with a sugar momma, it’s all about balance. Don’t be a complete pushover, and be prepared to hold your own, especially in conversations with her friends.
14. Be well groomed
Pay attention to your personal grooming if you want to be a high-quality sugar baby that wealthy sugar mommas like. If you have facial hair keep it neat and tidy. Keep fingernails short and clean. The little details are what she will be on the lookout for to assure her you are the kind of classy man she would like to get to know better.
15. Make her laugh
Of course, as with any regular dating situation, if you make them laugh, then you are in with a good chance of bagging that sugar mommy. Be intelligent with your humor and show her how charming and funny you are. She will soon be putty in your hands! [Read: 20 funny questions to ask a girl and have her ROFL]
Where to find a sugar momma
Of course, now that you have perfected your skills and are ready to get out there and woo an older lady, the question still remains, where do you find them? Luckily, it’s easy to meet potential sugar mommas—you just need to know where to look! Some great places to try are:
You can find sugar momma online dating platforms and sugar momma dating sites these days that make it easy for younger men and older women to connect *we will give you some examples in the next section if you’re looking for a sugar dating website to try*.
Simply set up a profile on these sugar momma dating apps and then search for cougars in your area. When you see someone you like the look of, reach out to them and see where it takes you. [Read: The tips and tricks to make an older woman fall for you]
Supermarkets are actually great places to look for a sugar momma. Go to higher-end supermarkets during the day and spot the attractive, older single women doing their weekly shopping. Make a cute comment about something in her shopping cart, and you’re in.
18. Cougar bars
Nowadays, if you live in a city, there will no doubt be a few well-known cougar bars where the older ladies like to get together, and the younger men like to hunt.
If you can’t find any information online, try high-end bars and intimate wine bars. You’ll soon find yourself in luck with the right sugar momma! [Read: Cougar dating: rules about dating an older woman]
19. In the park
The park is a great spot to meet businesswomen taking their lunch break or housewives jogging or taking a stroll, including sugar mommas.
Be confident and friendly in your approach. If you’ve got a furry friend to take on a walk, this is the perfect accessory to help those older ladies fall for your charms.
20. At the gym
Sugar mommas like to keep their bodies in tip-top condition, and they like their young men to do the same. That’s why gyms are a fantastic place to find sugar mummies! [Read: Gym etiquette: 13 faux pas that makes you look like an asshole]
21. Upscale restaurants
“Ladies who lunch” is a common phrase for a reason. Head down to the best place to find a sugar mummy, which is a classy restaurant, and you’ll find packs of perfect sugar mommas leisurely enjoying wine-fuelled lunches.
Better still, get a job there, and you’ll have a reason to approach them straight away. The next thing you know, you’re on your way to starting dating the first of your many sugar mamas.
Best sugar momma apps and dating sites
If you don’t want to hang out at the gym or in supermarkets waiting for the chance to meet a sugar momma, there is an easier way. After all, how do you know how rich a woman is just by looking at her?
It’s a lot easier to find a legit sugar momma if you go online to some of these sugar momma websites. Many of them are only focused on that instead of mainstream dating, although some are focused on both. [Read: The 17 best dating apps for men *2022* to help you meet the one]
– Seeking Arrangement
– Cougar Life
– Date a Cougar
– Secret Benefits
– Ashley Madison
– What’s Your Price
– Sugar Daddy Meet
– Sugar Daddy
-Older Women Dating
Is entering the world of sugar momma dating worth it?
Is the sugar mama dating experience worth it? This is a question that only the male sugar baby can answer himself. For some babies, it is definitely worth it, especially if they get a steady monthly allowance that can financially help them in their life by paying rent, bills, or tuition. Or simply having a better life. [Read: How to look rich – 40 ways to look like you’re rolling in cash]
For others, they might try it and find out it’s not really worth it. Part of it depends on how much money they are getting paid and how much sex is involved.
If there is a lot of sex required, it also matters how much a sugar baby is attracted to the woman. If he finds her very unattractive or way too old, then it might not be worth it.
As you can see, there are a lot of factors involved that determine whether or not being a sugar baby is worth it. But the only way to find out is if you give it a try.
[Read: Trophy husband – your golden guide to be a rich girl’s bitch]
Trying to find a sugar momma is all about going to the right places and knowing the right approach. With these tips, you are sure to bag yourself a hot, classy, generous one in no time.