The trophy-husband life sounds like something out of a twisted, dystopian Stepford Wives-style movie. But you must admit—it’s enticing. Days of nothing but gym appointments, extravagant galas, packing kids’ lunch boxes, playing soccer with them…
Plus, if those rose-tinted days ever become too much, you always have the rest of the afternoon to sit back, relax, put up your loafer-wearing feet, and chill out with a bottle of craft beer.
[Read: Husband material – what makes a guy a good life partner?]
Sounds good, right? There are plenty of men that would love to live a life of looked-after luxury. But how do you become a trophy husband? What are the signs that you’re a trophy husband, and is it ever a bad thing to be one? This feature will answer all of your questions.
While the trophy wife concept is nothing new, and has been the subject of many a reality show, the idea of a trophy husband refreshes the old stereotype. Many men have achieved this status and rank in the elite circle of society’s trophy spouses.
A simple definition of a trophy husband is an attractive married guy whose wife is the breadwinner in their household. A trophy husband doesn’t have a job, or any intention to get one. He’s happy to be supported by his wife.
Sometimes, he’ll be responsible for household chores and taking care of the kids. However, he might also be married to somebody who’s rich enough that she can pay for a maid or a nanny.
You could call a stay-at-home dad a trophy husband. He has a lot of the same features; he doesn’t work, and he relies on his wife for support. But there are some differences between a househusband and a trophy husband. [Read: What exactly is a trophy wife and why do all men desire one?]
Firstly, a stay-at-home husband has a lot more responsibility than a trophy husband. Rather than just focusing on looking good and staying chill, a househusband has to run his household and look after the children who depend on him.
Speaking of looking good, that leads us to the second difference between a househusband and a trophy husband. A trophy husband is always sexy. He doesn’t have to be hotter than the woman he’s with, but a lot of the time he will be.
His wife might be older, richer, or more successful, but he’s got the looks and the body to match her value. When people see a wife and her trophy husband together, they might start to wonder: ‘how did she swing that’? But they’ll know – the answer is money.
Lastly, a trophy husband is much more unusual than a househusband. True, being a stay-at-home husband is uncommon; on average, women earn 84% as much as men in the USA, so most households can’t afford to be female-led.
However, a trophy husband is even rarer. Very few women have the confidence to be the head of the house, and even fewer have the power, career, or money to make it happen.
So how does one exactly achieve trophy-husband status? Is it really ever more than just finding an aging baroness? Well, read these tips to easily become the trophy husband of your dreams. [Read: How to be a better husband – 20 things the best guys always do in a marriage]
First of all, you have to look the part. Aside from maintaining proper hygiene, get a membership at the gym and start running and pumping iron. Make it a lifetime goal to achieve and maintain those six-pack abs and those to-die-for pecs. But don’t just settle there.
Get yourself a tanning appointment on top of your manicure, pedicure, massage, and spa schedules. Doing all these on a regular basis to maintain that Ken doll look can put a big hole in your pocket. But it’s all going to pay off in the end when you achieve your trophy-husband status.
Who says girls should have all the fun anyway? [Read: How to be the “hot guy” – 20 rules for instant hotness]
If you want to be a trophy husband, then you don’t have any desire to chase a well-paying and successful career. So, why waste your time studying Economics or Management, when your true passion lies in French Literature?
Being a trophy husband doesn’t mean you’re an airhead. That’s a tired and disrespectful stereotype of trophy wives that we really don’t want to perpetuate. So, if the option is there, go to college, and also stay on top of the news.
Just as you work out your body, you should work out your brain!
We mean no wife-beaters or old community college sweatshirts. Once again, we reiterate—you have to look the part. Looking the part is almost half the battle. So get yourself some Abercrombie and Fitch, Lacoste, and other designer items.
You might have to stick with affordable fashion at first, or at least until you can land the big fish and break the bank on the more expensive labels.
Eventually, you won’t have to worry about the price tag, though, because your wife will be paying off all your credit card debts. [Read: How to be more attractive to women: 27 hacks that work like magic!]
You have to be in the right place, at the right time, and with the right people if you want to become the trophy husband your future wife is looking for.
First, build a wide circle of friends. Continue to network and work your way up until you meet someone who knows someone who knows someone who is the CEO of this up-and-coming tech company. [Read: How to meet rich people – A gold digger’s guidebook]
Get yourself invited to hoity-toity events such as fundraisers, polo matches, golf tournaments, and the highest of high teas so you can meet potential prospects. Spending time around the type of women you want to attract is guaranteed to land you one eventually.
Status, and money. Once you’re in with high society, you can bring on the charm and start taking your pick. Choose someone with the most expensive clothes and jewelry. Preferably someone who’s quite socially active, so she attends more parties to parade you around at.
Don’t pick someone near your age, though. She might end up replacing you with someone else. Find someone who is waiting for you to shower her with affection, as she showers you with expensive cars in return! [Read: 44 dating secrets to find a sugar momma & date a wealthy older woman]
So you have talents or skills, but that doesn’t mean you have to get a job. No-oh!
Tell your woman your talents anchor you at home—which you share now. You either have a craft you have to hone in a special room just off your mansion “together” or your blog needs maintaining in the comforts of your designer-furnished home office.
Since you stay home, you have to do something to make your lady look forward to coming home. Aside from the usual sensual massages you give, she’ll also relish the fact that you cook her gourmet meals.
In fact, she’ll even boast about it to her friends. So learn to cook really well! [Read: How to be more romantic: 46 cute ways to melt your partner’s heart]
Since being a trophy husband is primarily all about appearances, you have to show that you’re more than just meets the eye—or at least, create the illusion. Appearances, remember?
Enroll in dance classes. If you’re done with that, enroll in yoga. Then enroll in learning how to cook Persian cuisine. Then volunteer in a soup kitchen. Show that beneath your trophy-husband exterior is someone who cares; someone his wife can be proud to show off.
A good reason to stay at home. Get your go-getter CEO wife as early as you can, especially before she hits menopause. If the natural way doesn’t work, there are plenty of options for you both, such as artificial insemination, surrogacy, and adoption.
A couple of kids is enough to keep you at home, plus occupy you with PTA meetings and soccer practices.[Read: 19 signs of a taker in a relationship – are you a taker or a giver?]
In order to project how great you are at time management *and of course, you are*, you have to get involved in charity. This gives the impression that you aren’t just chugging wine or playing video games at home.
Devote your spare time *your whole day* to directing a foundation. It doesn’t have to be something big or groundbreaking. Of course, you don’t have the money for that!
Even if it’s something as small as the Movement for the Welfare of Squeaking Antarctic Parrots, it’ll give you a good cover for more time chugging wine and playing video games.
Picture it: you’ve found your perfect sugar mommy. That trophy husband life is just a couple of rings away, and you’re set to tie the knot soon.
You’ve worked sooo hard getting to where you are now, and you’ve invested so much of her money on yourself. But don’t let her stop you from having—and holding—what’s rightfully yours!
It’s just fair you have your share of her riches, which you have helped her spend. So don’t you dare sign that prenup, or you’ll lose all you’ve worked so hard for! Years from now, you’ll thank past-you once your wife meets someone younger… [Read: Dating an older woman: 45 pros, cons, myths & secrets to impress her & date her]
So, now you know how to become a trophy husband. But what if you feel like you’re already seeing yourself in this feature?
Is it possible that you’re a trophy husband already? If so, what are the signs to look for that’ll prove your suspicions right?
Never fear, we’ve got the tell-tale signs of a trophy husband all laid out for you. While you’re reading this list, think about which of these apply to your marriage. If things all start sounding a little familiar… then congrats! You’re a trophy husband.
Being a trophy husband doesn’t mean you spend every day at home. You might even have a job. However, your partner earns more than you.
She’s the main breadwinner, and your income is just a supplement or extra money for fun. If you stopped working, it probably wouldn’t make much difference to your finances.
You might even feel like your job is just a way to keep yourself occupied, or make you feel useful. If your income doesn’t facilitate your shared lifestyle, while your wife’s job funds your car, home, and vacations, you’re a trophy husband.
If you went crazy and let yourself go, would your partner ditch you? This might sound a little harsh, but most trophy husband relationships will make you feel as if you need to be physically fit for your marriage to work. Your partner likes you to be physically fit and loves to compliment you on your ripped physique.
If you find your partner keeps buying you gym gear and feeling your muscles, it might be because you’re a trophy husband. She might even give you a skincare routine, or expensive treatments. Anything to keep her arm candy looking flawless.
If your partner likes to use you as her personal dress-up doll and parade you around, it’s because you’re a trophy husband.
Choosing your partner’s clothes isn’t always a red flag. Sometimes, your partner might just dress you up because they want you to look good, especially if you’re attending a lot of swish parties together.
We’ve said it before, and we’ll say it again: having a trophy husband is all about having a hot guy to show off. Rich women don’t seek out hot, poor guys just to never be seen with them. So, it follows that if your partner likes to show you off, it’s because you’re a trophy husband.
Showing you off doesn’t mean your relationship is shallow, though. It can be a sign of how much your partner loves you! She loves you, loves how you look and feels proud to be hanging on your arm. [Read: How to make a guy feel needed and wanted: 17 secrets to happy love]
You might be wondering what a partner wants emotionally from her trophy husband. Sure, a smoking hot bod and her friends’ envy are some pretty solid perks.
But what about her feelings? A trophy husband always emotionally encourages his wife to follow her dreams and achieve them.
Sometimes, that means putting his own wants aside. But if your partner is successful, that means a better lifestyle for you. So, if you always put your wife first, it’s a clear sign you’re a trophy husband.
When you go on a vacation, who chooses the destination? Or, when you go out to eat, who picks which cuisine you’ll be having? If you always look to your wife to make the decisions, you’re maybe a trophy husband. [Read: Stay-at-home spouse – 18 reasons why the domestic life is so enviable]
Depending on your wife means trusting her to make all the decisions. From the big issues *like where you live*, to the small stuff *like what color shirt you pick*, your wife has the final say.
A trophy husband won’t mind losing control, either. The type of guy that becomes a trophy husband wants to be dependent and is happy for his partner to take the lead.
Like most things, there are good and bad sides to being a trophy husband. If you’ve always wanted to have a wife that looks after you, being a trophy husband is the best situation you could have. You’ll have everything you need to live a luxurious lifestyle, and you’ll never have to worry about money again.
However, you might also find yourself becoming a trophy husband when you don’t want to be. You really click with your wife, and you can’t imagine that she only married you for some arm candy.
If this sounds like you, never fear. You can have a perfectly healthy and happy relationship as a trophy husband. If anything, your trophy-husband status is a sign your wife is proud of you and wants to show you off.
Of course, sometimes you can be unhappy being a trophy husband. It can be especially problematic if you feel that your partner controls you, or forces you to be dependent on her. Forcing you to be financially dependent is abusive, and that’s never OK.
So, the key to a happy trophy-husband relationship is mutual respect and trust. Each of you brings something valuable to the relationship – whether that’s money, sex appeal, or support.
Remember, your wife should always need you just as much as you need her. If she respects you for the support and encouragement you give her, being a trophy husband is always a good thing.
Times are changing, and many boss women are taking control. They want husbands who don’t mind being eclipsed by the success of their partners. If you’re one of those guys who would rather be on the sidelines of life, or more like the poolsides of luxury resorts, just follow the tips above!
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