If your appeal were based on your online presence, are you a keeper or a goner? Here’s how you can filter your posts to be more appealing online.
Life is quite simple these days. Don’t know where to find Murakami’s latest book? Google it. You need to check which hotel to stay at and don’t know where? Just ask Google. You want to know if the person you’re crushing on is single? Google them.
You’d be surprised at the amount of information the internet has. Stalking is as easy as counting from one to three. You can even find out where they live, what their favorite food is, where they hang out. It doesn’t even matter if their social media profiles are “private,” the internet will always give you something. And if you have your game face on and are on the prowl for information, you will find what you are looking for, no matter how they try to hide it.
What not to post online
On the flip side, someone who might be interested in you only needs a browsing device and an internet connection to know more about you. Would they like what they see? If you’ve got too many of the following posts, you’ll probably just scare them off.
#1 YOLO moment number one: wasted nights. You’ve had too much to drink? Start hiding while you still can. You might be out with your friends, but in moments where everyone is more than tipsy, you can be assured that someone will take that photo somewhere. And when you get sober the following day, you won’t even remember anything.
But don’t fret. Everyone has a wasted photo. The only difference between you and that someone is their privacy. It’s a hundred times worse if you weren’t even the one who posted it! Be sure that whenever a photo of you surfaces and it shows how wild you can be when you get drunk, remove it. Or better yet, try to keep it classy, no matter how much you’ve had to drink.
#2 R. E. S. P. E. C. T. You definitely don’t want posts showing you dissing anything out of disrespect. This modern age of globalization is all about the whole world becoming one. Sure, you’re definitely entitled to your own opinion. But make sure that your opinion doesn’t offend anybody else.
#3 The futility of online fighting. Online fighting results in what? How do you think your potential lover would feel is they see you in a heated argument over something as trivial as a seemingly harmless tweet? If you are already fighting with people you don’t know over something petty, what more would you do if you’re already in a relationship with someone who might be into you? Too much negativity can kill anyone’s vibe, that’s for sure.
#4 “Please take me away.” Take you where? Do you want to go away on a vacation? Or are you saying that you want to take your life? Oe wait, are you just fishing for pity?
These cryptic depression posts online are better if you write them down in your private journal, not for the whole world to see. If you want your potential lover to not see you as someone who has a regularly scheduled mental breakdown just because you don’t know what to wear or which car you want to drive, then keep your cryptic depression posts to yourself.
#5 Look! I’m getting my tooth extracted! And above this caption is a photo of your oral cavity, bloody and all. Please. Nobody wants to see your anatomical insides. Nobody wants to see any disgusting injury photos. If you want pity for what’s happening to you, you can get it without showing anything.
Not everything should be shared online. Wouldn’t it be better for your potential partner to get acquainted with your oral cavity when he or she leans in for a kiss?
#6 The past is clearly interloping with the present. If people will look at your social media profile and they can’t tell whether you are still in a relationship or not, then perhaps it’s time you take a look at the profile yourself. You still post “throwback” pictures of you and your ex. You still recognize the presence of your ex in your life and tag them in all your updates, even though they’re clearly ignoring you now.
Before you can enter a new relationship, you have to move on. You also need to realize that you’re missing out a lot. Posting pictures of the past with your ex doesn’t look good, especially if a potential partner is checking you out. [Read: 10 signs your past relationship is holding you back]
#7 The selfie overload. It’s great that you’re appreciating the way you look. What’s not great is flooding your friends’ newsfeed with your selfies. Nothing says narcissism like a selfie every half hour. Your potential partner might appreciate the first couple of selfies on your profile. But if that’s the only thing you’ve got on your profile, then you’ll start to look like you have nothing more substantial to post. [Read: 16 signs you’re being an attention whore]
#8 Serious work rant. Unless you are your own boss, for your own sake, let’s hope that your potential partner doesn’t see how you backstab and complain about work on social media. It’s bad enough that you have work qualms that you don’t professionally deal with at work. Just imagine what a bad impression that would leave!
If you don’t like your job, curb the urge to post a long rant and just quit your miserable job! There’s no need to involve other people in your negativity.
#9 The humble brag. Arrogance isn’t sexy. What’s worse than arrogance is arrogance hidden behind a layer of fake modesty. For instance, you might rant and rave about the fact that your Louboutin pumps don’t perfectly match your Tiffany blue cocktail dress, and you just HAD to settle for your Jimmy Choo flats instead. Oh, boo hoo.
At least arrogance doesn’t urge people to respond. With the humble brag, your potential partner might just be confused about whether to try and console you or congratulate you on how much money you spend on designer footwear.
#10 A photo of you with tears in your eyes. When people are genuinely sad, you’d think they won’t have time to snap a photo of that lone tear making its way down their cheek, right? A photo of you crying only makes you look like an attention whore who’s looking for some pity. It’s not a sexy look, and it’s not something your potential partner will find appealing.
Anything that you post online is a gateway for others to know more about you. So the next time you’re thinking of posting something, think of how someone you like might respond. One wrong post might just spell the end of a relationship that could have been.