Love is a wonderful feeling to experience. And anyone who’s ever fallen in any kind of love can tell you just how light and wonderful falling in love can make you feel. If you’re wondering, am I in love, there are concrete signs to let you know that what you’re feeling really is love and not just infatuation or lust.
But if you’ve just started to feel the twinge of the painful pleasure love causes, it’s not easy to decode it even if you’ve been in love before.
[Read: The 15 phases of a new relationship to define your budding romance]
Love isn’t easy to explain because it comes in so many forms and stages. Contrary to popular belief, love doesn’t happen in just one stage. But it always starts the same way. It begins with that wonderful fuzzy feeling that leaves you feeling giddily happy, and with time, turns into something that’s more mature, long-lasting, and true.
There are different stages of love, and the honeymoon stage is just one of the first stages. This is where you feel the most excited, but that doesn’t mean the love fades away as you transition to other stages of love.
Anyone who has ever been in a long-term relationship will tell you that the excitement of the first stage will slowly transition into a warm and familiar feeling for the person you’re in love with. When you ask yourself, am I in love, and it turns out that you are, it truly is a wonderful and beautiful feeling.
Contrary to popular belief, love isn’t just a feeling, but it’s a choice. It starts with a feeling, but the key to making relationships last is constantly choosing them every day. Love is not just a chemical in your brain or butterflies in your stomach. Although there is that fuzzy feeling when you initially fall for someone, love is more than that.
When you love someone, you’re willing to go to extreme lengths to make them happy. Defining love is more complicated than you realize, but you’ll know it when you feel it. While love is often confused with attachment and infatuation, love is different from them because it lasts for a lot longer than the infatuation period.
If you don’t feel anything for them anymore after the excitement stage, that’s not love. It was simply infatuation.
[Read: What is true love? 22 signs of love to know if what you’re feeling is real]
Love can be confusing, especially if you’re experiencing that feeling for the first time with someone new. It leaves you feeling scared and yet overwhelmingly excited.
Use these signs to find out if you’re in love, and if you do experience most of these signs, you’re truly and deeply in the first stage of love, in a perfect start to something that could change your life for the better, forever!
[Read: How to fall in love the right way like you’re in a fairytale and make love last longer]
When you start to fall in love with someone, everything about the person you like would seem so perfect. And every second longer that you stare, they just seem to get better and better!
They make you love life even more, and it’s like everything seems better than it already is. If you’re wondering, am I in love, ask yourself if you’re feeling extra-happy and delirious right now.
You’re constantly distracted and have a hard time focusing on anything other than this new person in your life.
Everything other than your new lover, including your work, your friends, and your commitments starts to take a backseat. Your mind is constantly consumed with thoughts of them 24/7 but don’t worry, that’s normal when you’re falling in love with someone!
Selflessness is a really massive indicator of how in love you feel with someone. We’re all selfish by nature but when we’re in love, we tend to be really giving and generous to the person we love. You can’t help but put this person’s needs before yours all the time.
You’re eager to sacrifice your wants just to see your new lover happy because watching them happy makes you happy. [Read: A cute true love story of selfless and unconditional love]
You’d feel excited all the time when you start falling in love with someone. But with that high of excitement also come the terribly painful lows of disappointment. After all,falling in love is similar to an addiction, and that’s always full of highs and lows!
So as happy and excited they make you feel, they can also make you feel very disappointed, even about little things *like forgetting to call you when they said they would*. [Read: When should you say ‘I love you’ for the first time?]
Your mind drifts away into fantasyland almost all day. You may be in the middle of an important meeting or having a conversation with friends, but your mind may involuntarily drift into a daydream about the last time you and your new lover did something together.
So if you’re wondering, am I in love, pay attention to how often you think of them all day. You might even be unaware you’re doing it in the first place!
When you’re falling in love with someone, time may stand still when both of you are together. But yet, there’s just not enough time to be with each other! This is also why time flies by so fast whenever you’re with the person you love.
It’s as if time speeds up whenever you’re together, and you can never get enough of every moment spent with them. It’s because you’re in love! [Read: 60 perfect get-to-know-you questions for a new romance]
Everything about this person you love would start to seem charming or cute. It could be something as trivial as the way they run their hands through their hair, the way they scrunch their nose, or even the way they smile when you compliment them. If you’re wondering, am I in love, ask yourself if you find everything about them charming.
It’s nothing to be embarrassed about; you’re just really in love with them that you can’t help but admire their best qualities! [Read: 36 sweet things to say to your boyfriend and 50 really cute things to say to your girlfriend]
You’d feel very possessive of your lover. You may not always display your jealousy or your possessiveness to them, but you’d feel a twang of jealousy welling within you if you see your new lover having a conversation with an attractive someone.
This is because you can’t help but fear that they may fall for someone else and you want them to have eyes for you, and only you. That’s alright! As long as it’s not jealously in a controlling way, they might even find your jealousy cute! [Read: How to deal with jealousy in a relationship & learn to overcome it]
You create memories or try to compare anything both of you do together to something more beautiful, meaningful, and dramatic.
Something as trivial as having coffee together one evening could convince you that it is one of the happiest evenings of your life. Whether you end up doing nothing or everything together, every moment is worth cherishing for you.
If you’re falling in love with this person, you’d start naming places as “our place,” or “the place we laughed so much” or “the place which sells the cupcakes both of us love.” Doing that makes both of you feel closer, creates more together-memories faster and makes your relationship seem more meaningful and important, even if it’s only the infatuation stage.
You start resonating places with a memory you shared with them, and that’s because you’re in love! [Read: Top 50 date ideas to wow your date every time!]
You’re mesmerized when you listen to them talk about something. You don’t want them to stop talking, and you could spend all day watching those lips move so beautifully while saying anything at all.
You could spend all day listening to them talk about everything, and you’d appreciate it wholeheartedly. If you’re wondering, am I in love, watch how mesmerized you get by them when they talk.
When you love someone, you can’t stop talking about them. You’d talk about how amazing they are, how wonderful you feel, and how romantic the world feels all of a sudden, with anyone and everyone who’s willing to listen to you.
When you’re with your friends, you can’t stop gushing about your new crush or partner. Your friends might even be sick of you talking about them all the time because of this!
Rolling around in bed is a definite sign of falling in love. When you start to fall for someone, the comfort of a soft, cozy bed would remind you of your new lover’s touch.
And every morning, you’d spend a few more minutes running your hands around your bed and fantasizing about how perfect it would be if your lover was in bed with you. Really, how perfect would waking up be if that were the case?! [Read: How men actually fall in love – The 7 stages of love for men]
No matter how hard you try, you can’t clamp that smile shut even if your jaws hurt. The world looks so beautiful, and everything in it just makes you smile and jump.
So if your jaws hurt from smiling and laughing with them, it’s a definite sign you’re in love!
You constantly think of ways to do something special for them. When you’re shopping, you feel like picking something up for them. When you’re having lunch with friends at a really nice place, you wonder how it would be to come to this place with your new boyfriend or girlfriend.
You really make sure to go out of your way just to make the day extra special for them. You don’t even hesitate to buy them a token of appreciation whenever you go out without them! [Read: 25 sweet romantic gestures you could use everyday]
You may have been haunted by the memories of your ex for several months, but all of a sudden your ex doesn’t hurt you anymore. In fact, they don’t even exist anymore!
When you’re wondering, am I in love, you no longer care about your ex nor think about them. Ever since this person came into your life, you’ve completely disregarded your ex for months.
No one else seems as attractive and perfect as your new partner anymore. You could walk into a club and see the most gorgeous people on earth, but somehow, none of them seem as exciting as the one you’re falling in love with.
If you’re wondering, am I in love, start thinking about if you see them as “the one.”
Whether you believe in the concept of soulmates or not, this person is suddenly making you more romantic and idealistic. [Read: 10 important reasons why saying ‘I love you’ too soon really sucks!]
You just can’t keep your hands off this person when you’re with them. You hold hands while walking, talking, and even sitting at a restaurant. *even if that means you have to use only one hand to cut your steak!*
Especially when you’re still in the honeymoon phase, you find them completely irresistible and you just can’t keep your hands off them.
You make plans for the future, even if it’s only in your head. You imagine how wonderful the years ahead would be with this person in your life. If you’re wondering, am I in love, planning for the future in your mind is a huge indicator of your feelings.
You don’t just make plans for or with anyone, but you only do this for someone you love and want in your life forever! [Read: 50 relationship questions to test your compatibility for the long term]
You can’t stop grinning or blushing while talking to this person you love. Their compliments make you blush. Their longing stares make you melt like butter. And their warm hugs just make you want to sink into them completely.
Everything they do makes your heart melt and soften in more ways than you can count. It’s because you’re in love with them – there’s no other explanation! [Quiz: Is your partner really in love with you too?]
You may hate love songs to begin with, but when you fall in love, you can’t help but listen to mushy love songs and visualize your own fairytale romance in them.
Somehow, love songs always make you feel more in love, especially if the lyrics seem to coincide with your own love story. You’ve never understood love songs more than you do right now! [Read: 20 most romantic songs for the one you love]
When you’re in love with someone, it’s only natural you’d want to get to know them further. Even if you constantly go on dates, you feel like it’s never enough to get to know them.
You anticipate hearing details about their personal life because it also means your connection deepens. In fact, you really love it when they open up about something personal as it deepens your knowledge about them.
When you’re wondering, am I in love, watch how you can’t wait for the day you introduce them to all your loved ones. You can’t wait to show them off to all your friends and family because they’re so amazing!
You’re clearly smitten if this is the case. You only get this excited if you’re in love with someone, after all. [Read: Signs of falling in love – 25 sure-fire signs to watch out for]
When you’re in love with someone, you’re okay with seeing things from their perspective. Whether in arguments or just discussions in general, you don’t limit yourself to sticking to just your point of view.
You know that growth and love require expanding your outlook, especially for the person you love.
Love naturally makes you want to do better in life without them forcing it on you or controlling you. So if you’re wondering, am I in love, assess whether you see yourself changing for the better *because of them*.
You’ll know it’s love when you want yourself to do better, possibly to deserve them. [Read: 13 small changes that greatly improve your relationship]
Love doesn’t try to control or change you, but it embraces every version of yourself. If you feel like you don’t have to pretend around them or wear a mask, that’s how you know it’s true love.
The fact you can be your most authentic self around them speaks volumes that what you have is real. [Read: How to be yourself – 14 steps to unfake your life & love being you]
As we’ve mentioned earlier, the honeymoon stage is the phase of your relationship with the most excitement and adrenaline. This is because everything feels new, and you’re still getting familiar with each other.
Once this is over and the love for them remains, that’s how you know for sure it was never infatuation or attachment. It was and still is love. [Read: Honeymoon phase – How long before your love fades into nothing?]
When they turn you on, this doesn’t just mean sexually, but also emotionally and mentally. If you’re wondering, am I in love, the way they turn you on shouldn’t be just limited in the physical sense.
Otherwise, that’s just lust or infatuation. They should turn you on in your entire being and everything you are. You’d literally feel a tingle of excitement and passion just thinking of them. [Read: 30 turn-ons for girls that’ll make them melt in your arms]
Compromise is a big word in relationships. When you love someone, you’re selfless, which should also mean you can meet them halfway.
While relationships are never 50/50, the fact that you try your best efforts to make them happy means you’re in love! You wouldn’t do this for someone you don’t care about, after all. [Read: How to compromise in a relationship & not feel like you lost out]
Finally, if you’re wondering, am I in love, there shouldn’t be any mind games or reverse psychology going on. If you or they have to work hard to keep the interest alive, that isn’t love.
One of you will eventually get tired of playing the game and quit. Real love requires no games whatsoever, just authenticity and sincerity of emotions.
[Read: How to know when you’re in love – 50 signs you can’t ignore]
Love is an emotion for a reason, and it’s because it uses your heart rather than logic. Sometimes, especially if you can relate to most of these signs, you need just to follow your heart! Especially if it’s real love, why not go for it?
The first stage of love, the infatuation stage, is always wonderful, full of romance and unquenchable passion.
And it’s a perfect step to pave the way into the next eight stages of love, which will only get better and more meaningful. But which stage are you in right now? Or are you even in love?
Take a look at these 9 stages of love in every relationship and you’ll know exactly where you are, and where you’ll be going next!
So are you still wondering if you’re in love? These ‘am-I-in-love?’ signs will help you figure out if it’s love you’re genuinely feeling, and not just infatuation or lust.
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