If you’re a girl looking to flirt with other girls, it can be a bit difficult. With these flirting tips, you’ll be able to sweep any woman off her feet!
As a woman, the bi and lesbian dating scene can be pretty difficult at times. Maybe your girl on girl flirting skills are a bit rusty, or you’ve never even flirted with another woman before. Either way, we’re here to help!
Regardless of your gender or sexuality, flirting is essential to any relationship.
Flirting is the art of showing a person that you are interested in them suggestively and subtly in a fun way, without being too needy and desperate. It is a skill, just like any other, that takes much practice.
We are, of course, well aware that flirting can be very awkward and nerve-wracking at first, especially if you are doing it the wrong way.
If you can relate, then today is your lucky day! We are here to give you some tried and tested state secrets that will surely make you a flirting master!
[Read: Lesbian dating apps – 2023’s best & most used apps for girl on girl love]
What attracts a woman to another woman
We wish we could tell you the magic secret to get a woman to be physically attracted to you, but we would be lying if we did. The truth is, everyone has preferences. What one woman may find physically appealing will be different from what another woman thinks. However, there are common personality traits that are desired by women.
Personality is more attractive than appearance. If you’ve got a smoking hot body but a dull or bitchy personality, you’re going to look way less attractive than an average-looking woman with an amazing personality. [Read: 45 positive & negative personality traits that can change your life forever!]
The first trait that women find attractive is kindness. When you have a kind personality, you are more approachable and likable.
We naturally gravitate toward kind people because they are more empathetic and reliable – two traits that make for an amazing partner or friend.
The second trait is confidence. Confidence is the sexiest thing you can be!
After all, it creates an aura that draws people to you. When you’re confident, women will see you as a woman who is secure in life. You’re not self-conscious or obsessing over the what-ifs, instead, you’re living life for yourself.
All in all, what makes a woman attractive is her personality. It’s not how she dresses or what her body looks like – it’s how she carries herself that really attracts other women. When you exude kindness and confidence, other women will naturally be drawn to you. [Read: 55 secrets & self-love habits to build confidence and realize your worth]
How to flirt with a girl and make her like you
There’s no one secret to flirting with another girl. It all depends on the girl you like, and how she responds. Here are a couple of tips to up your odds of getting her to be into you.
1. Bark up the right tree
This is a must! A prelude to the whole flirting scene is knowing first that you are flirting with someone who also likes girls! So if you’re not even sure she’s into girls, reel it back in before you try to flirt with her.
Now, you can attempt to gauge if she swings the same way based on her presence, but you’re not going to truly know unless she tells you. There are ways to go about this if you’re not confident to ask her straight up, “Hey, do you like girls?”.
For starters, you can ask your friend circle or her friend circle if you happen to know them. If not, you can bring up LGBT topics during a conversation with her.
Mention how you love bi or lesbian characters in a movie or bring up the topic of Pride Parades. If you mention LGBT topics in a safe space, she is likely to let you know she likes girls, too.
However, if she has a weird, uncomfortable, or stand-offish reaction, abort the mission. If she isn’t comfortable talking about LGBT topics with you, she definitely isn’t comfortable engaging in an LGBT relationship with you! [Read: 26 lesbian stereotypes, myths & clichés most people still believe even now]
2. Go out of your way to be polite
Just because you’re a woman doesn’t mean you can’t be chivalrous. Acts like opening doors and pulling out chairs aren’t reserved for men only.
These simple gestures are signs of politeness and should definitely be practiced on women you’re trying to woo.
Open the door, scoot in her chair, wait to eat until she starts to eat, give her your coat, and pay for her meal – any chivalrous act is going to make your politeness shine through. It’s the simple things that let her know you value her.
3. Be confident
Confidence is definitely a sexy asset. Knowing how to carry yourself is one thing that every kind of girl is attracted to, regardless of her sexuality.
Look smart and act smart! Know your style, dress to impress, wear your best perfume, and most importantly, be comfortable with yourself.
However, keep in mind that there is a fine line between confidence and cockiness. Self-assurance is the root of confidence, while arrogance is the source of all cockiness. The latter is always a turn-off. Be confident without even trying! [Read: Confident or cocky? 16 subtle signs that split an arrogant & modest man]
4. Talk with your eyes
The key here is eye contact. This may sound like a cliché, but this is the most useful flirtatious cliché in the whole flirting history!
Perhaps it is because the eyes are the most magical of all organs. Everything about you can be easily seen in your eyes, your intentions, your fears, your hopes, and your dreams.
Making the right eye contact can effortlessly draw someone to you. But when done wrong, this girl on girl flirting tip can ward someone off. So, don’t just keep on glancing at her. And definitely don’t stare directly at her!
Instead, tease her with your eyes. Use your eyes to communicate to her that you see her and you’re interested. Hold your stare for at least a few seconds, and see if she will reconnect. If she does, then good job! Get up to her and start talking. [Read: Subtle eye contact flirting tips to catch someone’s eye from afar]
5. Get her talking
You can start a conversation by asking her open-ended questions. Ask for her name, where she’s from, and what her interests, hobbies, music, or movie preferences are to get her talking. Whatever you talk about, just make sure it’s not all about you. Show her you’re interested in her by asking her questions.
Be sure to avoid delicate matters such as past relationships, heartbreaks, and erotic sex like you’re some kind of a maniac who can’t wait to get laid… unless it is indeed your plan.
This isn’t an interrogation though! So loosen up and let the conversations flow. Don’t throw question after question at her, instead, open up discussions based on her responses. That’s how you get a conversation going. [Read: 50 VERY good conversation starters that’ll make anyone love talking to you!]
6. Make her feel seen and heard
If you retain the information she’s said to you and are responsive about it, it will undoubtedly make every woman feel that they are extra special.
Forgetting her answers to your previous questions or asking the same questions repeatedly is a major don’t in every girl’s book!
In the same vein, being unresponsive conveys signs of indifference or half-heartedness. So when she shares something with you, be sure to either respond through body language or with words. This girl on girl flirting tip is essential because it lets her know you’re interested in her.
7. Don’t forget to smile
A smile goes a long way. It makes you seem relaxed, friendly, and approachable. Not to mention, a smile or laugh shows you’re interested in what she is saying! If you’re the nervous type, smiling can help you relax a bit as well.
While you don’t have to be rolling on the floor laughing and grinning from ear to ear, do stay relaxed and smile. This doesn’t mean you should be smiling all night and forget talking. Flirty smiles must be occasional but intentional.
If you are too nervous to smile, keep in mind that she is as nervous as you are, and there is a good chance that she may just be waiting for any sort of assurance. So smile away and seal the deal!
8. Find out what makes her laugh
It’s no secret that humor is an extremely attractive trait. After all, laughter puts people at ease and makes them feel included.
So don’t be afraid to get your joke book out and try to make her laugh *we don’t recommend carrying around a literal book of jokes though*! [Read: 20 funny compliments you can use to flatter & make them laugh]
9. Observe how she responds to your nearness
When you stand near her, does she seem to gravitate toward you?
Maybe she leans her body toward yours or is always nearby. What about when you sit down? Does she shift in her seat the other way or do your thighs touch?
How someone responds to your nearness can be a telling sign of whether or not they like you.
If you notice her slowly inching away, it’s best to back off as she might be uncomfortable. But if she leans into you often or lingers when you accidentally touch, it’s a sign she enjoys your closeness.
10. Light touching
If she seems comfortable with your nearness, being a little touchy is okay. Touch her hand while talking to her, brush your skin against her arm while sharing a few laughs, or wrap your arms around her shoulders.
These are all subtle ways to share touch with someone else. If she leans into your touches, she’s likely interested in you. The key to mastering this girl on girl flirting tip is to always do less than more. [Read: How to flirt by touch & use subtle body language to seduce anyone]
11. Offer to get her a drink or food
Whether you’re at a bar, walking out in town, at a restaurant, or another place with food and drinks, offer to get her something.
Women love to be “taken care of” because it makes them feel seen and cared for. After all, who doesn’t love being pampered?
Even if she says, “You really don’t have to,” do it anyways! Let her know she deserves to be treated well and that you want to be the one who treats her well. You really can’t go wrong with this tip for girl on girl flirting!
12. Compliment her
Complimenting is a huge part of being flirtatious. So, let her know you find her attractive. When you give her compliments, be genuine and specific.
Don’t just tell her, “I think you’re hot.” Instead, be specific about what traits of hers that you love. “I love the way your dimples show when you smile,” “Your sweater brings out your eyes so well,” and “Your lipstick shade compliments your features beautifully”.
All of these compliments are personal and tell her that you really notice her. [Read: 53 flirty things to say to a girl to compliment her & make her blush]
13. Tease her gently
Teasing is a great flirting tip for girls. A bit of teasing here and there shows that you don’t take yourself too seriously and that you’re confident and comfortable enough to joke around. Flirtatious banter is definitely a turn-on!
Be sure that your teasing comments are good-natured and aren’t mean. The last thing you’ll want her to think is that you’re bullying her!
14. Let her know you think of her
If you’ve spent some time apart, let her know that you were thinking of her during that time. This, of course, should be in a sweet way… Not a stalker way.
So, let her know she isn’t someone who is out of sight, out of mind. Tell her you missed hearing her laugh or talking to her and you anticipate the next time you’ll see each other.
15. Tell her you enjoy being with her
Whether it’s after the first time you’ve met her or you’ve known her for months, always tell her that you enjoy your time together. Text her after you’ve come home, or amp it up a notch and write her a letter.
Showing your gratitude in the form of a written letter is very personal and thoughtful. If you take the time to handwrite a letter to her, she’ll definitely be blushed. [Read: 20 romantic secrets & examples to write a love letter & melt their heart]
16. Be respectful
This is the most important flirting tip for when you’re trying to get a woman’s attention. Always, always be respectful. Never intentionally show her disrespect and avoid crossing any boundaries with her.
If she seems uncomfortable or as if she doesn’t want to take things further, don’t push her. The last thing you want to do is overdo it and make her run for the hills, along with every other woman in the area who gets word that you’re disrespectful.
17. Be casual
When you practice these tips, do so casually. Don’t go overboard trying to impress her, don’t drown her in compliments, and don’t be overbearing.
Women have a keen sense of when someone is being “fake” with them, so she will be able to tell that you’re being over-the-top to impress her.
The best flirting tip? Just be yourself
No matter what, never stray from who you really are! After all, you’re looking for someone who likes you for who you are, not who you’re pretending to be.
If you remember any girl on girl flirting tip from this feature, make it this one! [Read: 33 secrets to be true to yourself & 15 signs you need to unfake your life]
When you confidently be your true, authentic self, things will happen as they should. You may not land every date, but that’s because it wasn’t meant to be. But don’t let that simple fact discourage you from being yourself. Instead, use it as motivation to pursue your fate.
Healthy relationships are formed when both women are comfortable being themselves. With comfort comes confidence, happiness, and self-love.
So when you are living as your authentic self, others can tell. You’ll have a radiating glow to yourself that draws people in like a haven.
And don’t forget – tell her you like her!
If you’re seeing a girl you are truly interested in, don’t hold back your feelings. Chances are, she may be waiting for you to confess so she knows it’s safe to confess as well! So if what you feel for her is genuine, let her know.
In the bi and lesbian dating scene, it can be pretty difficult to meet a girl you click with. That difficulty can create a sense of pressure to move things as quickly as possible, but don’t! Instead, feel things out and confess to her only when you’re ready.
Don’t put too much pressure on yourself for the future, just enjoy where you are in the present. Take your time exploring your new interest and have fun with it!
[Read: Answers to dumb questions people ask lesbians]
Flirting with a cute girl can be really fun! Just remember to be true to yourself, create interesting conversation, and keep it playful. If you follow our tips for flirting with other women, you’re sure to strike some luck!
