There’s no need to fear anal sex, if done right it feels absolutely amazing. All you need to do is be in the right position – anal sex positions that is.
Anal sex positions, for many people, is like the roller coaster of the bedroom – it’s either a thrilling adventure or a frightening thought. Maybe they had a bad experience or heard horror stories from friends. Maybe they’re just intrigued but uncertain. Either way, it often gets the “Nope, not for me” stamp.
But fear not, *and we mean that literally, because we’re all about reducing that amygdala activation here*. We completely understand, and we’re not here to push anyone into the wild ride without a proper guide.
Instead, we’ll dive into the intricacies and, yes, the pleasures of anal sex positions, all within the comforting boundaries of consensual and loving relationships.
No judgment, no pressure – just education, openness, and a healthy sprinkle of humor to make everything go down a little more smoothly.
[Read: How to have anal sex and 51 bum must-knows to enjoy your first time]
The Importance of Communication Before Trying Anal Sex
When it comes to any new adventure in the bedroom, communication isn’t just key, it’s the whole darn locksmith shop. If sex were a dance, you wouldn’t want to tango without first knowing the steps, right?
Let’s chat about informed consent. Nope, it’s not just a fancy legal term, it’s relationship gold. It means that both partners are fully aware of what they’re getting into, how they’re getting into it, and why.
No surprises, no mixed signals, just good old-fashioned transparency.
Remember the game ‘Telephone’ from your childhood? You whispered something into your friend’s ear, and by the time it got to the last person, the message was all mixed up.
Don’t let that happen with anal sex! Keep the lines of communication as clear as a cloudless sky.
Now, let’s sprinkle some emotional intelligence into the mix. This is about understanding and managing not only your emotions but also your partner’s.
Think of it like cooking together. You wouldn’t throw a pinch of salt into the stew if your partner hates salt, would you?
Emotional intelligence in the bedroom is the same – reading the room, being aware of your partner’s comfort level, and making decisions that make both of you feel good.
It’s not just love-making, it’s love-listening and love-understanding! [Read: Why do guys like anal sex? And should you give the back door a try?]
Preparation and Safety Before Having Anal Sex
Now that we’re all on the same page with communication, let’s talk about getting ready. And no, we’re not talking about choosing the right playlist *though, hey, that could help!*.
We’re focusing on the ABCs of preparation and safety for anal sex.
A – Awareness
Know what you and your partner are comfortable with. If trust is the foundation of a relationship, then awareness is the house’s sturdy walls. It’s the bedrock of vulnerability and helps you open up without fear.
B – Basics
Invest in the proper materials. Think lube, protection, and relaxation techniques. Not all heroes wear capes, some come in small bottles labeled “water-based lubricant.”
And, of course, understanding the anatomy involved goes without saying *but we said it anyway*.
C – Comfort (Mirror Neurons)
This is where those clever “mirror neurons” come into play. These are the brain cells responsible for empathy, the ones that fire when you see someone else experiencing something.
They allow you to gauge your partner’s comfort levels without them saying a word.
So if you’re ever unsure, take a moment to look at your partner. Your mirror neurons will give you a glimpse into their comfort zone, and you’ll know whether to proceed, slow down, or halt. [Read: 24 benefits (and risks) of anal sex that’ll make your bum want to bend over]
Bonus: Dealing with the Unexpected
Hey, life’s full of surprises, and not all of them come wrapped in shiny paper. If something doesn’t go as planned, don’t panic.
Be patient, be gentle, and remember that Rome wasn’t built in a day *and neither is the perfect sexual experience*.
The Best Anal Sex Positions To Try
Whether you’re a seasoned pioneer or just curious about exploring new terrain, our comprehensive guide is here to illuminate the path.
With humor, insight, and empathy, we’ll take you on a journey from the gentle explorations of a beginner to the thrilling adventures of a pleasure-seeking pioneer.
Stage 1: The Explorers
If you’re new to this landscape or just dipping your toes in the whole anal sex waters, then try these positions. This stage is all about curiosity, comfort, and gentle discovery.
[Read: Why do guys like anal sex & should you give the back door a try?]
1. The Spoon
Want a gentle beginning? The Spoon is your go-to. Lie on your side while your partner lies behind you. Gradually, they can enter you from behind.
You both control the depth and speed, and you can enjoy some sweet spooning cuddles on the way. It’s intimacy with a side of excitement.
2. The Lap Dance
Sit on your partner’s lap, facing away from them. Then, you control the action as you slide onto them. It’s like giving a private dance with the benefits of close connection.
Bonus: You take the lead, making this a win-win for both.
3. The Lying Down
Much like The Spoon but with both partners lying down flat. It’s like a horizontal hug with a naughty twist.
4. The Sit and Straddle
One partner sits on a chair, and the other straddles them, facing forward like a warm embrace with a sprinkle of spice.
5. The Side Saddle
One partner lies on their side; the other kneels beside them, entering from the side.
This position allows for a comfortable and intimate connection, with both partners enjoying the sensation and closeness it provides. It offers the opportunity for eye contact and an embrace with a loving partner.
6. The Gentle Arch
This one is an elegant archway to pleasure without the fuss. One partner lies on their back, arching slightly; the other kneels in front, entering. [Read: What does anal sex feel like, both physically and mentally]
Stage 2: The Adventurers
So you’ve moved past the initial exploration and now stand ready to dive deeper. This stage is for those who have garnered some experience and confidence and are keen to discover more.
With continued trust and communication with your partner, this stage invites you to experiment with new positions and techniques while maintaining comfort and safety.
7. The Modified Doggy
Imagine the classic doggy style but with a supportive twist. Your partner kneels behind you, and you lean onto your hands or elbows. It offers control, depth, and eye contact if you turn your head. Woof! But in the best way possible.
8. The Stand and Deliver
In this standing position, both partners are facing the same direction. One partner stands upright, and the other stands right in front of them, leaning forward onto a stable surface like a table or wall.
This leaning provides support and the proper angle for the standing partner to enter from behind. The position offers both partners the opportunity to control speed and depth, with the standing partner having access to the leaning partner’s body for additional stimulation.
Communication and trust play vital roles here, allowing for adjustments and enhancing the overall experience. It’s a position that combines the thrill of standing with the intimacy of connection, creating a unique and engaging dynamic between partners. [Read: Painful anal sex? 31 happy bum tips to make backdoor sex smooth and easy]
9. The Leg Up
Partner one lies down flat on their back, relaxing into the surface. The other partner stands or kneels beside them, gently lifting one of the lying partner’s legs to create an opening.
This enables the standing or kneeling partner to enter from a unique angle.
The position allows for varied levels of depth and control, and both partners can engage in eye contact, touch, and communication throughout. It offers a blend of intimacy and physical closeness, making it a rewarding choice for many couples.
10. The Bridge Builder
One partner lies down on their back, fully relaxed with legs extended. The other partner stands over them, positioning themselves between the lying partner’s legs.
The standing partner then takes gentle hold of the lying partner’s legs, either at the thighs or ankles, depending on comfort and flexibility.
The standing partner has the freedom to control the motion, while the lying partner can communicate preferences in rhythm, depth, and sensation.
The position may require some strength and balance from the standing partner and comfort and trust from the lying partner. Pillows or cushions can be used to adjust the height or comfort level for both parties. [Read: Do women like anal sex? Mostly no, sometimes yes, and what else to know]
11. The Kneeling Lean
Both partners kneel on a comfortable surface, facing each other, close enough to engage in eye contact and touch.
One partner leans back, supported by their arms or hands, while the other moves forward to support and enter. The leaning partner’s pose offers an appealing angle for entry, allowing the supporting partner to control depth and rhythm.
Simultaneously, the face-to-face alignment facilitates emotional connection, intimacy, and communication. It’s a position that encourages mutual trust, as both partners work together to maintain balance and comfort.
12. The Tabletop Tango
The receiving partner lies down on a sturdy and comfortable table, legs hanging slightly over the edge, while the other partner stands or kneels at the table’s edge to enter.
The height of the table plays a key role in aligning both partners’ bodies, making it easier for the standing or kneeling partner to control the angle and depth of penetration.
The lying partner can relax and enjoy the sensation, having the opportunity to engage in eye contact or touch the standing or kneeling partner’s hands or arms.
Stage 3: The Pioneers
If you and your partner find yourselves here, it means you’ve built a strong foundation in trust, communication, and experience with anal sex positions.
This is about pushing boundaries within comfort and consent, exploring new techniques, and enhancing intimacy in novel ways.
13. The Gravity-Defier
In this invigorating position, one partner lies down on their back, elevating their legs in the air, while the other partner stands facing them, holding onto the legs and entering.
The standing partner’s grasp on the legs provides stability and control, allowing for various angles of penetration.
The position’s unique alignment creates a sensation that’s both thrilling and intimate, blending the excitement of a new perspective with the deep connection between partners.
14. The Sensual Scissors
In this side-lying position, both partners lie on their sides, facing the same direction, and scissor their legs together to create an interlocking arrangement.
The position enables the rear partner to enter the front partner, with the intertwined legs providing a natural guide and control for depth and rhythm. The closeness of this position fosters intimacy and allows both partners to explore each other’s bodies with their hands, adding to the pleasure and connection.
It’s a comfortable and tender position that emphasizes trust and communication, making it a favorite for couples seeking a more relaxed yet deeply satisfying experience.
15. The Reverse Cowgirl *or Cowboy*
One partner sits comfortably on a chair or other sturdy surface, while the other partner sits on their lap, facing away from them. The partner on top then slides onto their partner, creating an angle for entry, and begins to ride.
Controlling the depth and speed becomes an empowering and pleasurable part of the experience for the top partner. The partner sitting down can also engage by holding onto the hips or other parts of the body, creating a rhythm together.
[Read: Reverse cowgirl sex position: what it is & how to ride in sexy style]
16. The Fusion
Lie on your back at the edge of a bed or surface, legs up. Your partner stands and holds your legs, entering you. It’s like fusing two great things into one incredible experience.
17. The Acrobat
Both partners align themselves vertically, and one partner bends over at the waist, possibly supporting themselves with their hands on their knees or another sturdy surface. The other partner then positions themselves behind the bent-over partner, aligning for entry.
The position allows for various depths and angles of penetration, which the partners can explore and adjust to their liking. The standing arrangement adds a sense of vigor and spontaneity, while the face-away posture creates a sense of trust and a thrilling element of surprise.
18. The Tangle
In this position, one partner lies down on a comfortable surface, elevating their legs in the air while the other partner kneels in front of them, holding onto the legs for support and guidance.
The kneeling partner’s hold offers control over the angle and depth of penetration, while the lying partner’s raised legs create an appealing and accessible entry point. [Read: How to eat ass – 28 analingus positions and rim job tips to eat booty like a boss]
Common Misconceptions & Myths
From exaggerated horror stories to misguided stereotypes, misconceptions about anal sex have been around for quite some time. But here’s where we draw the line!
It’s time to separate fact from fiction, myths from truths.
Misconception 1: It’s Only for a Certain Type of Person
Reality Check: Let’s bust this stereotype! Engaging in this type of intimacy isn’t confined to any specific group or orientation.
The human psyche isn’t a one-size-fits-all. People’s preferences are as diverse as, well, people!
Misconception 2: It’s Always Painful
Reality Check: Ah, the pain myth! With proper preparation, communication, and, of course, consent, it doesn’t have to be painful.
[Read: Painful anal sex: 31 happy bum tips to make backdoor sex hurt less]
Misconception 3: It’s Unhygienic and Unhealthy
Reality Check: Cleanliness is key, yes, but it’s far from unhygienic or unhealthy when done with care and proper preparation.
Misconception 4: It’s Emotionally Detached
Reality Check: Contrary to popular belief, it can be a deeply intimate and connecting experience. It’s about mutual trust and vulnerability.
It’s knowing and respecting each other’s feelings and boundaries, not just in the bedroom but in life.
Misconception 5: It’s a New Fad
Reality Check: Surprise! It’s been around for centuries, across various cultures. It’s not some new-age trend but an aspect of human sexuality that’s evolved and been understood differently over time.
So, it’s not like the latest smartphone – no updates required!
Misconception 6: It’s Only Pleasurable for One Partner
Reality Check: Contrary to this belief, pleasure isn’t a one-way street here. With understanding, communication, and the right approach, both partners can find enjoyment.
[Read: What does anal sex feel like both physically and mentally?]
Misconception 7: It Negates the Need for Safe Sex Practices
Reality Check: A big NO to this myth! Safe sex practices are essential, regardless of the type of sexual activity. It’s a non-negotiable!
Misconception 8: It’s Incompatible with a ‘Normal’ or ‘Healthy’ Relationship
Reality Check: This misconception might stem from societal stigmas, but engaging in this activity doesn’t define or determine the health of a relationship.
Relationships are complex, multifaceted tapestries woven from trust, respect, and communication.
[Read: 38 signs & signs of a happy, healthy relationship & what it should look like]
Misconception 9: It Must Always Lead to Orgasm
Reality Check: Orgasm isn’t the sole purpose or guarantee. Anal sex can be pleasurable and satisfying without necessarily culminating in an orgasm. It’s not the destination but the journey that matters here.
[Read: 10 tips for women who want to mind-blowing orgasm]
Misconception 10: It’s a Sign of Infidelity or Dissatisfaction
Reality Check: Just because someone is interested in exploring this aspect doesn’t mean they are unfaithful or dissatisfied. People’s desires and interests are diverse and multifaceted as we said earlier.
Embrace the Adventure!
See? Who said anal sex positions were supposed to be rough and animalistic? It’s all about trust, communication, preparation, and connection.
Whether you’re a beginner or experienced adventurer in the realm of intimacy, understanding the various aspects of anal sex can lead to fulfilling and enjoyable experiences for both partners.
[Read: Pegging – How to try it, 48 tips, myths and the best positions to give it a try]
Embrace the adventure that awaits you and your partner, as these anal sex positions can lead to exciting and fulfilling experiences. Don’t be afraid to try positions that pique your curiosity and resonate with both of you.