You should always be aware of the signs of a bad relationship so you’ll know when to get the hell out of there. Here’s what you should look for.
Bad relationships are all over the place. Chances are, you’ve been in one before. And if you don’t think you have, you could be in one right now. Since you’re here, you’re probably wondering what the signs of a bad relationship are so you can rule out your own.
I have bad news for you. If you’re reading this, you’re probably going through a rough time with your partner. While not all setbacks are an indication of a bad relationship, enough to make you want to research it could prove to be problematic.
Bad relationships affect far more than just your love life
They can make your entire life worse. Everything from your friendships to your career can suffer if you’re in a toxic relationship. Knowing the signs of one is a very powerful way you can take back control and prevent everything from going downhill. [Read: 7 secret signs that reveal a shitty relationship]
Signs of a bad relationship to keep a lookout for
Nobody wants to be with someone who’s bad for them. We all want that incredible, fun love story we see all over social media. While those may not be completely accurate, they’re great goals to shoot for.
Wanting a healthy relationship is important. Recognizing that you’re not in one is also very valuable. If you truly want to know if your relationship is bad and unhealthy for both of you, here are the glaring signs of a bad relationship to watch out for.
#1 Lack of communication. When you don’t talk to each other or worse, you CAN’T talk to each other, something is very, very wrong. In order for a relationship to be healthy, you have to be able to discuss everything. If you can’t even tell your partner when you’re upset, it’s not a good relationship. [Read: How to fix a lack of communication in a relationship]
#2 Insults – even if they’re just “jokes.” It’s perfectly fine to tease and joke around with your significant other. It becomes a problem when those “jokes” are actually insulting and hurtful. You have to know what will cause your significant other pain.
And on the flip side, if they’re continuously insulting you and it’s actually making you upset, then you have to say something. If you can’t and this is a serious problem, it’s a sign of a bad relationship.
#3 Belittling each other in front of guests. This can be difficult to determine simply because some people have a hard time figuring out where the line is between teasing and belittling. But if it’s blatant, then you have an awful relationship. Putting each other down should never be tolerated. [Read: 12 types of humor and how it affects relationships]
#4 Arguments with no resolution. Fighting in relationships is perfectly fine. Obviously, if you’re fighting all the time, that’s not good. But arguing and then never actually talking about it is a major issue. You can’t bottle up those feelings. If you do, they’ll explode in the worst ways.
#5 Having make-up sex instead of talking. If your arguments all end in the bedroom, you have an unhealthy relationship. It’s okay if you talk it out and make up BEFORE the sex, but using sex a means to solve your problems is as toxic as it gets.
#6 Your friends have told you it’s bad. They know you best and they can tell when your behavior takes a dive for the worse. You really have to listen to them. It’s hard and you may be very defensive at first, but they care about you. Telling you the relationship is bad means it truly is. [Read: 8 kinds of friends everyone needs in their life]
#7 Your family doesn’t like them. Most of your family members can tell if someone is treating you right just by how you act. If they have issues with the guy, it’s for a reason. Pay attention to your family and even ask them what they think. Some may not even be shy about telling you how they feel.
#8 Their family doesn’t like you. Normally with bad relationships, both people are to blame. This may be evident with the way their family treats you. You might think you’re being great to them but if their family is showing you otherwise, it’s time to do some self-reflecting.
#9 Passive aggressive notes are left everywhere. When your partner is leaving you notes all about the stuff they’re mad at you for, it’s not healthy. This is a very passive aggressive way of going about problem solving. When you can’t talk, the relationship is unhealthy. [Read: How to deal with passive aggressive behavior calmly and with class]
#10 You don’t prioritize each other. If you’re in a relationship, your partner should be your priority. Of course you have other things to worry about, but they should still be toward the top of the list. If you’re both ignoring each other and not respecting that prioritization, things will never be good for you.
#11 You hardly do nice things for one another. In a healthy relationship, your goal is to always make each other happy. When you stop doing those things, something is wrong. You can’t be with someone if you don’t even want to do nice things for them.
#12 You don’t appreciate the stuff you actually do for each other. When you actually do stuff that’s sweet and kind, neither of you appreciates when the other person does it. When you come to expect nice things and never acknowledge that they’re done, you’re not grateful. Being ungrateful is not healthy. [Read: 16 ways to show appreciation for someone you love]
#13 You feel relieved when you get to be alone. Now, a lot of people enjoy their alone time. But when you were just with your partner and are relieved when they finally leave, there’s an issue.
You should want to be around your significant other. Not wanting them around means you don’t like their company. If you don’t like their company, then why are you even together?
#14 You sometimes wish you weren’t together. Even if you’re arguing, you should never feel like this in a healthy relationship. If you do, it’s one of the many signs of a bad relationship and you probably aren’t happy. When you feel this way more often than not, it’s trouble.
#15 You’re unhappy. This should just be obvious, but some people need the reminder. If you’re not happy with your significant other, you shouldn’t be together. Forget about how long you’ve been with them or what anyone else would think if you split. Your happiness is of the utmost importance.
Knowing the signs of a bad relationship can really save you. Once they start popping up, you can either make the decision to fix things, or leave. The choice for you and your own happiness is up to you.
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Bella is a lifestyle writer, cheese enthusiast (Wisconsin native over here) and fantasy adventure author-in-progress who enjoys all things love, dog, p...