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18 Ingenious Ways to Catch a Cheating Partner!

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Does your instinct tell you your lover is cheating on you? Use these 18 discreet ways on how to catch a cheating partner to catch them red handed! By Jessica Dawson

how to catch a cheating partner

Sometimes, you just know it.

You don’t know how, but you feel it in your gut, and something tells you that your partner is cheating on you.

You try confronting your partner about it, but they swat your concerns away and tell you that you’re just being paranoid.

Ever been there?

Are you convinced that your spouse is cheating on you, even though you can’t find any proof of it?

Of course, sometimes you may be going overboard with your paranoia, especially if you’re rather clingy and insecure to begin with.

[Read: 13 clingy girlfriend signs that’ll ruin your relationship]

But what if, by some miniscule margin, your instincts do turn out to be right eventually?

The fact that you doubt your partner is a sign that things aren’t all rosy in romance land.

And just suppressing your doubts and fears, and pretending like everything’s perfectly normal won’t help you at all.

In fact, it’ll just tear both of you apart from the inside because there’s no more trust in the relationship.

Is your partner cheating on you?

There are just two ways to get the nagging worry out of your head. One, you talk about it with your lover and get a convincing answer from them. Or secondly, you sneak around discreetly and try to get some proof of your partner’s philandering ways *if any*.

If you feel insecure in a relationship, always talk to your partner and tell them what you feel. Sometimes, it may just be a silly misunderstanding. And communication always helps sort things out, even if one of you is on the verge of looking out for an affair. [Read: The 10 biggest problems in a relationship and ten ways to fix them all]

But if your doubts don’t get erased even after the conversation, then perhaps, the only way to get the real answers is by snooping around and looking for clues when your partner is too busy doing their own thing.

18 ingenious ways to catch a cheating partner

Confronting a serial cheater or a guiltless cheater never helps, because no matter how much you cry or remind them how much you love them, they’re just too selfish to think about anyone but themselves. So instead of confronting your lover every night, take it easy and let your partner assume that all is well and forgotten.

After all, you can’t catch a cheating lover when they’re being cautious and on guard. Just pretend like everything’s normal and watch how your partner behaves around you over the next few weeks.

[Read: 13 secret signs your boyfriend isn’t over his ex yet]

[Read: 14 subtle and discreet signs your girlfriend isn’t over her ex yet]

Once your partner thinks you don’t suspect them anymore, use these 18 signs and ways to catch a cheating partner to catch your lover in the act!

#1 Watch the signs. Do you see a change in your partner’s behavior recently? Have they started working out, dressing better, or started using a new seductive intense evening perfume? They may have no reason for the changes, and almost always, these changes may seem very spontaneous.

#2 Drop by unannounced. Every now and then, drop by unannounced to their workplace or come back home early. Don’t make it obvious that you’re just spying on them. Instead, always have a great excuse to walk in unannounced. If your partner is cheating on you, the first thing they’d do *instead of welcoming you with a smile* is hide something or appear surprised or even angry! [Read: 3 big reasons and 27 excuses behind why men cheat!]

#3 Check their recycle bin. The garbage is a great place to dispose of things. And sometimes, it also has a lot of clues. If your partner is on the computer often, check the computer’s recycle bin often. Chances are, there may be another person’s photo or a little snippet of information that could be of some use.

#4 Snoop on their phone. Does your partner carry their cell phone with them wherever they go, even if it’s a trip to the loo? If that’s happening in your relationship, there’s a good chance your partner’s up to something. Take a peek into their cell phone when you get the chance, especially when they’ve put the phone on charge.

Erased phone logs, a password protected phone, several calls to the same unknown numbers, or phone bills without detailed call information are all good signs that your partner is trying to hide something. [Read: 25 reasons why women cheat so easily on their man]

#5 Spontaneous sex. This works better if you’re a girl, and dating a guy. If your boyfriend or husband comes home late from any unexpected delay, try to have spontaneous sex with them when they get back home. If your guy gets angry, pushes you away or tries avoiding it at all costs, chances are, he may be exhausted down there. He could always wash himself up before getting home, but getting it up immediately and blowing a huge load, that’s not the easiest thing to do!

#6 Follow after a fight. Most cheating partners intentionally try to pick fights, slam the door and walk away, because it makes a great excuse to slip out of the house and meet their adulterous lover. If your partner’s been picking fights and walking out of the house often recently, try to follow them on the pretense of apologizing *if they see you following them*. [Read: 10 tips to fight fair in love and get closer after a fight]

#7 Change your sleeping habits. If your partner’s cheating on you, their sleeping habits may change almost overnight. They may stay up longer using the excuse of work, or you may catch them sneaking around the house late at night. Pretend like you’re asleep as soon as you hit the bed, and try to see if your partner’s up to something. Do they get out of bed for long periods of time?

And it’s not just late nights you need to think about. Some cheating partners may even wake up really early and get on the phone, especially if they realize you suspect them.

#8 Does your partner want space? Space is something all of us need in a relationship, whether we accept it or not. But has your partner started getting fiercely protective about their space recently? Do they hate answering questions about where they’ve been or what they’ve been up to? It’s definitely a small warning sign. [Read: How to give the right kind of space and prevent your partner from straying]

#9 They get jumpy. Try walking in on your partner when they least expect it without announcing yourself, especially if they’ve been by themselves for a while. Does your partner act jumpy or nervous when you walk in on them, especially if they’re over the phone or in front of their computer? They were probably doing something and they don’t want you to know what it was.

#10 Changes in schedule. All of a sudden, your partner may stay out a lot of nights on work, or have a lot of get-togethers on their social calendar with their friends. If your partner doesn’t ever invite you with their friends, or if they claim to be very busy working and still look fresh and happy when they get home, your partner’s probably up to something. [Read: 18 emotional affair signs you probably didn’t even notice!]

#11 The phone etiquette. Your partner suddenly needs a lot of space while talking over the phone. They either sound awkward or they walk away from you to the next room while talking over the phone with a few people. You may even find text messages from random numbers with random texts in them.

Remember, when people cheat, they could always store the other lover’s number under another name, and use code words to interact with each other when they miss each other!

#12 Gadgets. Your partner has changed most of their passwords, even if you thought you knew all of them. And even when you ask them for the new password, they make an excuse to hide it from you. And sometimes, you may see that they position their computer facing away from you, and they would never do that before. [Confessions: Having an unexpected affair with a married man turned me into a home wrecker!]

#13 Grooming habits. Hitting the gym, wearing new clothes and perfume are all signs your partner wants to look better. But are they going overboard with their appearances? Has your partner started grooming themselves down there meticulously all of a sudden, even though they aren’t keen on doing something with you?

#14 Sneaking away. Does your partner sneak out of the house every now and then, using the silliest of excuses? “I’m driving down to the store to get something…” “My friends are catching up around the corner…” “I’m bored, I’m going for a drive…” or something along those lines?

That’s alright though. But when you offer to tag along, what does your partner say? Do they make an excuse to go alone? That’s fishy, don’t you think? [Read: Emotional cheating and 10 bad ways it can ruin a cheater’s life]

4 shady and sneaky unethical ways to catch a cheating lover

Now the earlier 14 signs would definitely help you find out if your partner’s cheating on you with someone else. But if you want to nail them, you’re going to have to catch them in the act. And there’s no way you can do that unless you walk in on your partner with the person they’re cheating on you with. But if you do choose to go spy-mode and use a few unethical ways, here are four ways to nail your partner’s cheating backside in no time.

But try these ways only if you’re already certain your partner’s cheating on you. These steps are great to catch them, but if they aren’t cheating on you and it was just a false alarm, your partner may feel extremely hurt by your actions! [Read: Should you ever confess to cheating on your partner?]

#15 Hidden cameras. Place a spycam in the room where your partner hangs out most often when they want alone time. If they’re over the phone or doing some funny business behind your back, you’ll know soon enough.

#16 Create a fake profile. Create a fake profile and log on to websites that promote cheating spouses and see if your partner’s using one of them. Or for starters, just create a fake facebook profile and add a lot of random friends to make your account seem legitimate.

And then, send an invite to your partner and get friendly with them. And over a few days or weeks, start flirting with them and see how they respond to you. Are they interested in meeting up or hooking up? [Read: Is revenge sex a good way to get back at a cheating partner?]

#17 Keyloggers. Keyloggers are software that you can download off the net *some free and some for a price*. Some of these keyloggers, especially the paid versions, can be installed in a computer and the person using it would never know it’s running in the background.

These programs can record whatever you want, the passwords they use, the letters they type, the pages they visit, or even record a video of the screen as they use the computer. You can also download a few paid apps over your phone and install a secret app in your partner’s phone to keep track of their calls too. [Read: How to end an affair and get over it completely]

#18 GPS device. Are you the one who wants to catch your partner red handed? Then the stalker mode may work for you! Pick up a tiny GPS device that can be fixed to the underside of your partner’s car. You can track their movements and pounce on them when their pants are around their ankles in a sleazy motel out of town! [Read: How to confess to cheating on your partner the right way]

Use these 18 ways on how to catch a cheating partner, and there’s no way a cheater can get away with their adulterous ways. But remember, don’t use the last four ways unless you’re certain your partner’s cheating on you already and you just want to confront them in the act!

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Have your say!
  • vivian igudia
    August 21, 2013 | Permalink |

    pls,wat if my boyfriend has a child,wat do i do?

  • sypher
    September 22, 2013 | Permalink |

    Gps tracker makes u look like a stalker

  • Kelly Molinari
    December 28, 2013 | Permalink |

    I know my husband is cheater. I want to get him back and take everything he has

  • Mrs Lynda Brown
    June 4, 2014 | Permalink |

    My husband has confessed to cheating but also said it’s over, but it clearly is not, I’m trying hard to keep the family together, I don’t know what else to do.

  • Cyril
    June 5, 2014 | Permalink |

    Well mam I know that feeling,the best way to catch your man keep telling him all is good .Be happy around him, then open your eyes and ears (close mouth), try not to spook him,let him know you trust him. Now he has your trust back, trust me he will mess up. Had to use it on my wife of 21 yrs (JUST SAYING)

  • nadine milton
    June 7, 2014 | Permalink |

    My husband was acting secretive about where he was and what he was doing and always keeping his cellphone in his pocket so i couldn’t get it, then i remembered he had set up the phone account on the internet so i went on our computer and found the account user name and password and checked his itemised bills. What a shock i got, i thought he was just using it to chat on facebook with another woman but he was texting and sending picture messages and calling for conversations lasting hours at a time. I downloaded the itemised bills and confronted him and he said he couldn’t help it but would try to stop. he did and we are good now.

  • Jake
    June 23, 2014 | Permalink |

    Hey Sypher, shut the fuck up.

  • bozo nono
    July 10, 2014 | Permalink |

    Y’all need to get de-vorced!! Why be with a liar….you will never have trust again and what is living on his pecker????????? Get rid of the person that lies to you.

  • LK
    August 10, 2014 | Permalink |

    I just caught my girlfriend cheating barely 2 hours ago, so the experience is still fresh. The big giveaway was the phone secrecy, and talking about a new friend which she didn’t want me to meet. My advice to everyone: if you have that gut feeling, you can be 90% certain that it’s happening, so you should conduct a plan to catch the cheater. I thought a lot about how to catch her, but I just couldn’t decide because of the risk of discovery, which would seal any further attempts. I thought about keyloggers, remote phone tracking, hiding a sound recorder, etc. But in the end, my method was way more simple and timeles. The biggest help I got was talking with a very good female friend of mine, after my detailed description of the situation, she gave me amazing insight to how my gf thinks, feels, and acts. After discussing with the friend, I decided that I will keep a watch on the bus stop near my gf’s house, so I could see her getting back home from the party where she didn’t want me to go. After 2.5 hours of boredom, I saw them getting of the bus hugging each other, so I followed them home from a distance (quite easy to do at night when they are drunk). They stopped to make out twice, so it was easy to confirm my suspicion. After they went inside, I tried to call my gf, but her phone was off, so I rang the doorbell. After she answered, I told her I saw everything, and she should bring me down my squash racket. She let me in, I went up, got my stuff at the door, and went home. To my surprise she didn’t break down, just acted annoyed and confused that I watched and caugt her. I feel amazing now, as I’m again reassured of my intelligence, and people skills, but of course I’m sure I will have some bad days ahead of me, when it will sink in, that my 5 year relationship is over.
    Key takeawy: trust you gut, and deal with it oldschool PI style. I’m going to sleep now, I hope this helped some.

  • joni
    August 15, 2014 | Permalink |

    I came up with a really good way to catch a cheater. My situation was unique, because.I suspected my fiance cheating at work, so a lot of the tactics.of.catching.him red handed I found to be quite difficult. I decided to buy one of these tiny usb voice recorders, and cut a small hole and sew the recorder into a patch in his cargo pants. It worked. It was.so small.he couldn’t notice it, and I was able to retrieve it.back after he went to bed…listened to.it, and confirmed my suspicions to be true. It.drove him crazy that he couldn’t figure out.how I found.out, and I never told.him.because it didnt matter. I knew the truth finally!

  • surena
    September 10, 2014 | Permalink |

    I’m in the midst of having just caught my husband of five yrs txtn with Sumone who looked him up on Facebook. Same day I found the texts, saying she got tickets to a baseball game, he announces to me he’s going to be gong to a Gamgee with co workers! So I waited calmed down and confronted him. He tried to get mad at me! I think I’m done, I don’t trust him, and find it to be a waste of time. No wonder there’s no intimacy. He says it’s not me! Ya it’s her!! Oooooohh and he claims he neva met up with her. And when I askEd for her name he couldn’t remember her last name but had her under dan instead of Debbie! Lol

  • Kim
    November 27, 2014 | Permalink |

    If you’re a logical person who doesn’t have a history of being crazy and insecure and your guts telling you something’s up…,listen to it! Too many times we let things slide. We make excuses for our partners odd behaviors. If they are acting odd it’s CUZ they’re doing something they shouldn’t be doing BOTTOM LINE!!! If they start running one piece of trash outside to the big trash can n not just put trash in the kitchen and eIt to take a full can out to big trash there’s a FREAT CHANCE HIS LOVERS OUTSIDE or lover dropped him a note he had to retrieve. If you know them well and suddenly you hardly know him???? there’s a reason for it.

  • Alpha 1
    December 18, 2014 | Permalink |

    Always, always the best way is to let a PI do it for you, they are impartial and can look at things without the emotion that the injured party would.

  • Connie
    December 19, 2014 | Permalink |

    My husband’s coworker texts my husband all day. She will call him at night sometimes too. I answered the phone one night and she was speechless and when she did begin to talk she was stuttering and made no sense. I gave the phone to my husband and he acted upset that she was on the phone. I confronted him and asked if he were cheating and he got so upset and started yeling at me. He said he’s sick of me blaming him for cheating and that he’s tired of life. He said he was going to kill himself. I had to apologize just so that he would not hurt himself. I called him the other day and he did not answer or answer my texts. I checked the phone log and he had text her and she text right back. The texts happened right before I tried calling him. He called me a half hour later. I don’t know if he’s cheating or not.

  • Wendy
    December 31, 2014 | Permalink |

    I caught my husband of 10 years cheating with the maid and then years later (13) my fiance with his first cousin…trust your gut feeling and know that you are not crazy as they claim but picking up on their cheating vibes. It is very hard to trust again but I would not join them or become one of them. I’ve seen that this breaks families apart and children may never recover because of some parents who use them as weapons against the other.

  • Alice Smith
    January 2, 2015 | Permalink |

    Social networks and mobile phones make seeking a partner-in-lust and communicating with her clandestinely easier than ever before. Unfortunately technology is making it exceedingly difficult to answer that question with the same level of confidence possible a generation ago. Sometimes, I really tired and worried about my boyfriend. So I google search… have many solutions. However, I think use a spy software, it seems reasonable. I try 1TopSpy, it made me to keep real-time tabs on whom your spouse conversation chats detail, SMS messages with. Then, I’m really disappointed about what I hear…

  • Amanda
    January 22, 2015 | Permalink |

    I found a lot of helpful information up here. I will surely use some of it. I believe my husband is cheating,

  • Adam
    February 2, 2015 | Permalink |

    Right so a couple years ago my girl friend started going uni I always had insecurity’s that’s she was going to cheat on my so after her telling me that she spent all her time with her 2 girl mates that she met there. So after about 4 month of her being there I am going crazy getting a really bad feeling that something is going on. So I decide to confront her like never before I told her that I knew what was going on some on who goes to her uni told me. So she came clean and admitted that she “kissed” another guy according to her this went on for a month or 2 and they kissed a few time. To this day I’m sure more went on. So as for Her 2 mates that she spent her days there with it turns out that the whole time she was with 2 guys as well as these girls. Even after she told me about this guy she said she still wanted to be friends with him!. When I first found out I told her it was over but then once I calmed down I couldn’t go ahead with it and decided to stay together. I should mention we had a 2yr old daughter at this time. When I decided to stay she finished her uni work at home. So a few months down the line her *holiday time* she got pregnant again so took a year out. Another year down the line she is back at uni the same one. And she tells me that she has 2 girl mates and spends all her time at uni with them (one mainly) and I can’t get rid of that sick feeling that she is cheating again she tells me that it’s all in my head and she would never do it again but I can’t shake this feeling. What do I do ??
    P.s. sorry about the length of the post I did shorten it lol

  • Sharon stacey
    February 22, 2015 | Permalink |

    I think my man is cheating. Online ?

  • malunga
    March 9, 2015 | Permalink |

    Same problem as above

  • nixx
    March 16, 2015 | Permalink |

    I have a troubbled past and numerous trust issues because of that, but recently I have had the hunch (more so than normal) that my sweetheart is cheating. I love him so very much but he DOES have a history of being a bit of a player, So that worries me. When we first started dating I caught him texting and old high school friend and flirting pretty hard core. I confronted him about it and to my knowledge, he stopped talking to her. He used to keep pictures of his ex girlfriends around the house because he said that even though they were exes that he still had pleasant memories with them that he didnt want to let go of. I asked him to take them down and he did. Fast forward to the past few weeks. He works with this girl named lacy that all of the guys seem to think is really attractive. Yesterday, he accidentally called me lacy. Today we were talking about one of his old girlfriends and he accidentally called HER lacy too. More than once. I know they flirt. He came home once and had smiley faces drawn all over his arm from her. So, its pretty obvious they play around. The situation irritated me, so i logged onto his facebook and tried to see what was up. I found that it was NOT lacy but in fact another firl he was frequently looking up on facebook. I have yet to find messages between them . At the same time I found that he was frequently searching this mystery girls name on facebook, i aslo found that he has old profiles from awhile back on couger life and a couple of other misc. dating sites. I investigated those and they looked inactive for the most part. When I caskually asked him if he was on any dating sites he said no. That being siad does it sound like im dealing with a cheater or just a really forgetful man whos tying to leave his promiscuous past behind? I might also add that he likes to keep a pass code on his phone and if he thinks i know it or i’ve found it out he changes it. He informed me that he doesn’t like kissing, or hugging, and he hardly tells me he loves me. It breaks my heart. I don’t know how to dael with how unemotional he is sometimes even if hes NOT cheating. any tips on how to communicate with a man who thinks feelings are silly? Thank you everyone

  • notthatgulible
    March 21, 2015 | Permalink |

    I think my wife is cheating on me because she will say she need to go get somthing for supper,tampons, little stuff like that. she says ill b right back. two or three hours later she returns. when i ask her about it she says she lost track of time. how can i catch her ass????

  • Emma
    March 24, 2015 | Permalink |

    The best way to reveal your cheating spouse is to download keylogger software http://www.refog.com. So did I! Fortunately, my husband was doing nothing criminal:) In God we trust, the rest we check.

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