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How to Tell Your Boyfriend You Love Him: 20 Sweet and Easy Ways

Cupid’s arrow has hit! You’re sure that your feelings are no longer about lust and about the big L. So, how to tell your boyfriend you love him?

how to tell your boyfriend you love him

When you first start dating someone, it’s all about lust, butterflies and a little infatuation. However, over time, you start to think about how you really feel. Sometimes nothing much comes of it. You don’t really feel much other than friendship, or perhaps the lust sticks around but not much else. However, when Cupid decides to grace you with his presence, you need to learn how to tell your boyfriend you love him in the right way.

It’s safe to say that most people have been in this situation. Love is a crazy emotion, and when it’s pent up inside of you, it’ll make you go crazy. So, if you’re wondering how to tell your boyfriend you love him *especially for the first time*, what are you going to do?

You have to tell him how you feel. Not just for him to know, but also for you to get that weight off your shoulders. There’s the old saying that you should always tell someone how you feel because tomorrow is never guaranteed. What do you think? Right or a little dramatic?

However, telling your boyfriend you love him is hard and it can also be worrying. Does he feel the same? What if he thinks you’re moving too fast? It’s not as easy as it looks. But if you want to free yourself, you have to step up and be the one to say it. [Read: 10 reasons why saying “I love you” too soon just sucks]

How to tell your boyfriend you love him – 20 tips to do the right thing

You’re probably nervous now, but you’ll feel so much better after saying it. But remember, there’s no “right way” or “wrong way” to profess your love. It’s really just about taking the leap of faith and going for it. Isn’t that what love is all about? Here are 17 tips for how to tell your boyfriend you love him.

1. Decide how you’d like to say it

Think about the moment you tell him you love him. In your mind, how to you picture it? In bed? During dinner? Now, I’m not saying it’s going to turn out like that – you may end up having an argument and then blurting it out accidentally. But, at least try and come up with a plan. [Read: How to tell a special someone you’re in love with them]

2. Do what feels right

If your friends or parents are pressuring you, ignore them. Don’t force it. This is a really important tip for how to tell your boyfriend you love him. Make sure you really do have those feelings, and then if so, do it when you feel it’s right. Though you’re telling him you love him, this is really about you opening up.

3. Rip off the Band Aid and just say it in the most simple way

You don’t have to word it differently if you don’t want to. You can just tell him, “I love you.” Some people want to use poetry and other artistic art forms to say it, but there’s nothing wrong with that simple line. Go on, just do it! You’ll feel so much better afterwards. [Read: Different ways to say ‘I love you’ without saying a word]

4. Pick a place that’s special to both of you

If you two have a special restaurant that you both love to go to, or a park that you both like to read in, why not take him there? Then you can tell him how you feel. It’s a great way to show him how special he is to you.

5. While you’re on vacation

Well, a trip somewhere warm and sunny is a perfect way to tell him how you feel. It’s summer, the weather is beautiful, you two are completely relaxed enjoying the time together, why not say it then? It’ll make for an unforgettable trip. So why not follow this tip for how to tell your boyfriend you love him? [Read: When should you say “I love you” for the first time?]

6. When you’re both in a good mood

This is crucial. If he’s had a bad day at work and then you tell him you love him, now, he may end up being either really happy or overwhelmed. You don’t know.

So, wait until he’s in a good mood. That being said, it could also work out well if you tell him during an argument, but, generally people respond better when they’re in good spirits.

7. Choose a private setting

You can totally tell him in front of your family and friends if you want to. Sure, he’ll shit his pants, but nevermind. However, a private setting is more appropriate in general. He’ll be able to tell you how he feels without feeling uncomfortable and pressured. There’s enough pressure on him already, don’t add more.

8. You could try a passing conversation

If you feel fear when wondering how to tell your boyfriend you love him, you can take the indirect approach. If you’re too nervous to tell him that you love him, then saying it in passing conversation. It doesn’t have to be obvious. But if you just slip it in, he’ll probably want you to rewind and then ask what you just said. That’ll be then a good opportunity to discuss it. [Read: Should you tell him you really like him? 12 signs it’s time]

9. Express your feelings through art

If you can draw or paint, then why not tell him you love him through that? Paint him a painting of something meaningful, or make him a card that tells him how you feel. It’s romantic, and it’s something that he’ll be able to keep with him forever.

10. Or, perhaps try a song

Now we’re starting to sound like a chick flick, but listen, if you’re a musician then it’s a good way to say it. Plus, it’s romantic. Now, if you’re not a good singer, it’s best to avoid it, unless you’re trying to be funny. But, all in all, music is poetry and love, so don’t hold back from trying this out.

11. Sex is a good time, but proceed with caution

Sex is another great method to use if you are wondering how to tell your boyfriend you love him. You’re naked, skin touching skin, it’s all sensual, and then you whisper those three words in his ear. It’s emotional, and well, it will probably get you into having the best sex of your life. However, it could also make him think you don’t really mean it and that you’re just lost in the moment of lust. This one should be used in caution, but it’s a possibility if you feel that’s right for you. [Read: 25 really romantic ideas to make your lover melt]

12. You can use other words if you prefer

You don’t have to say, “I love you” literally. Of course, t’s the easiest to understand, so if you’re worried he’s not going to like the direct approach, then do this. But you can use phrases like, “you make me happy,” or  “I’m so lucky to have met you.” I mean, it’s quite clear that saying that implies something bigger. [Read: How to prove that you love someone the right way]

13. Try humor but make sure he knows you mean it

Saying these three words doesn’t have to be a dramatic event. It can be light and relaxing. If you have a good sense of humor, you can say “I love you” in a quirky way. Like saying, “I love you like a fat kid loves cake.” You said what you needed to say, but you gave a cute and funny twist to it. However, don’t laugh it off too much otherwise he might think you’re just teasing and you don’t really mean it. Don’t confuse the poor guy!

14. The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach

If you have a creative side, you can make his favorite cake or dish and spell out the words, “I love you.” Not a bad idea, eh? Not only will he love the idea, but his tummy will be happy as well. So it’s basically a win-win. [Read: 13 down-to-earth ways to express your love without words]

15. Say it when he does something nice for you

This is a great opportunity to slip the phrase into a thank you. The next time your boyfriend does something nice, like surprises you with flowers or takes care of you when you’re sick, casually tell him that you love him.

16. Tell him just as he’s leaving

When he’s leaving to go to work or to head back home from a sleepover at your place, stand by the door and tell him you love him. Try calling him by his name first, that’ll get his attention, and then add more seriousness to what you’re going to say. [Read: 25 signs he loves you even if he doesn’t say it out loud]

17. Never force him to say it back

This is important. You have to prepare yourself for the off-chance that he doesn’t love you back. I know, nobody wants to hear this, but it could happen. However, it might just be that he doesn’t feel ready to say it yet, he’s not quite there yet, or that he’s dealing with past baggage on this type of subject and he’s working through it. Pressuring him won’t make him say it back and if you pressure him and he does say it, how can you be sure it’s a genuine vow of affection? Give him space and let him say it when he’s truly ready.

But, and this is a big but, even if he doesn’t say it back yet, or ever, that doesn’t mean your feelings aren’t valid.

18. Avoid huge gestures

Now, you might want to have a band serenade him with those special three words but the truth is that we don’t all enjoy big gestures in public! Make sure that you know your guy’s love language before you start planning something that could make him feel uncomfortable. [Read: 13 Weird, unique ways to build intimacy with your partner]

19. Don’t say it too soon

How long have you know him? How long have you been dating? There’s no rule as to when you should say these three words but it’s generally accepted that you should wait a little while before dropping the L bomb. It’s super-easy to mistake infatuation or even lust for love, but love takes time to develop. You can’t truly love someone that you don’t know and trust yet, so give yourself time and allow things to work themselves out. When the time is right, you’ll know.

20. Don’t tell his friends or family

We’ve already mentioned that you probably shouldn’t do it it front of people but don’t go around professing your love on social media or telling his friends and family members about your feelings. It should be between the two of you, until you’re both ready to go shouting it from the rooftops. [Read: 7 Clear signs it’s time to meet the parents]

Remember that we all love differently

Not everyone shows their love in the same way. This is what is known as your love language. There are five love languages:

  • Words of affirmation – Basically saying how you feel and often
  • Quality time – Doing things together and sharing new experiences as a couple
  • Physical touch – Being tactile and cuddly
  • Acts of serving – Doing nice things for your partner just because you want to
  • Receiving gifts – Presents from your partner make you realize how much they love you

It’s unlikely that you both have the same love language and that means that we all love slightly differently. Maybe you’re someone who really values words of affirmation but your boyfriend is more about acts of service. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t show his love to you, you just need to see what he’s doing and appreciate it.

If you find it easy to talk about your feelings but your boyfriend doesn’t, simply try and appreciate the other things he does and shows you and see if you can work out his feelings from there.

[Read: 14 signs your guy really means it when he says “I love you”]

Now that you all these tips for how to tell your boyfriend you love him, find which one suits you the best and say it. There’s no time like the present!

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Natasha Ivanovic
Natasha Ivanovic is an intimacy, dating, and relationship writer best known for her writings on Kiiroo, LovePanky, Post Pravda, and more. She's the creator and ...
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