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How to Find a Unicorn & Why Dating One is Harder Than You Think

how to find a unicorn

Unicorns are mythical. I’ve never seen one, neither have you *probably*. In the dating world however, there are two types. So, how to find a unicorn?

In the dating world, there are two types of unicorns. You might be wondering how to find a unicorn, but first you need to know about the two terms and what they mean. Otherwise, you might find yourself in a rather sticky situation!

So, when you hear the word ‘unicorn,’ what pops into your mind first?

Probably the horse with a horn on its head, the mythical creature that has long adorned children’s toys and meditation websites. Well, I’m going to put myself out there and say you’ve never seen one. If you have, well, you were either rather drunk or you need to contact a magazine and sell your story ASAP!

[Read: Unicorn dating: How to find a naughty unicorn and set the right rules]

What is a unicorn?

The first type of unicorn is a pretty benign type; however, they are extremely hard to find. This is someone who is a fantastic catch. This person is undeniably good looking, pretty sane, they have a good sense of humor, they respect other people, have a fantastic personality, oh, and they’re fantastic in bed. This is the type of person everyone wants to find.

As you can see, pretty difficult to find!

The other type of unicorn is a little different. A ‘unicorn’ is a term used to describe, usually a girl, who is bisexual and is on the lookout to join forces with other couples to enjoy no-strings-attached threesomes.

As you can see, you need to be sure which type of unicorn you’re looking for before you ask the question ‘how to find a unicorn’!

[Read: How to read the signs your friend wants to be your unicorn sex buddy]

To be clear, the first type of unicorn is far harder to find than the second. The reason is that many people aren’t convinced the first type of unicorn even exists. Can anyone be that perfect? And, surely everyone’s idea of perfection is totally different, so one person’s unicorn would be another person’s, well, horse with a cone on its head.

When you’re asking how to find a unicorn, you should ask how to find your unicorn. In that case, the search should be easier. You simply spread your net wide, date outside of your normal type, give those who you wouldn’t normally date a chance, and throw away your inhibitions. That should give you a greater chance of meeting someone you would describe as a unicorn. As far as describing one specific person as this type of mythical creature? I don’t buy it.

Now, the second type of unicorn isn’t that hard to find. Learning how to find a unicorn in this category is as simple as heading online. Now, you should be careful here. The people you think you’ve met online aren’t always genuine. To be honest, there are some pretty scary people out there pretending to be someone they’re not. [Read: 13 quick ways to instantly catch a catfisher online]

Tinder is a pretty obvious place to head if you’re looking for this type of arrangement. However, always be honest and upfront about what you’re looking for and don’t dupe someone into thinking you want more than you do. You’re more likely to come up trumps when asking how to find a unicorn when you’re honest about what you want.

[Read: The threesome invite – How to ask someone to join you in bed]

How to find a unicorn – It is all about communication

Regardless of which type of unicorn you’re attempting to find, it’s important to communicate honestly. Telling someone what you’re looking for isn’t easy. Most of us worry that if we’re upfront about such things, the other person will freak out and run away. This fear is the same if you’re trying to find someone to date or if you’re looking for the type of unicorn to complete your threesome dreams.

It’s only by being brave enough to say “I’m looking for this” can you really find what you’re looking for. The other person might not be automatically up for it. They might need a little time to think, but that’s fine. You’ve been honest and that means you have no regrets. Then, they might think about it and come back to you with a positive answer. Again, this goes for either type of unicorn.

Finding the first type, e.g. the so-called perfect partner, takes years and years and even then you’re very unlikely to find them. Everyone has flaws and failings, and to be honest, being with someone who is 100% perfect would be extremely boring.

I’m not advocating arguments with your other half, but come on, surely life would be a little dull without them? These misunderstandings and falling outs mean that you can come together and have the best make up sex ever! They also inject that passion in your relationship and help you to healthily sort out your differences. Without those arguments, simply because the other person is just too perfect, believe me, you’ll become bored. [Read: 15 must-follow rules to be a good partner in a relationship]

In this case, understanding how to find a unicorn who is perfect for you is like looking for a four leaf clover. Give it up, it’s not going to happen. Focus on finding someone who you connect with on a deeper level and love them for their flaws as much as their plus points. It’s a far more interesting and rewarding experience.

Looking for the second kind of unicorn requires communication that is altogether more terrifying! You are more likely to be knocked back when asking a bisexual woman to be the third wheel in your sexual games than you are accepted.

Again, if you don’t ask, you don’t get! In terms of knowing how to find a unicorn of this type, you’re best narrowing down your search to places where this type of thing is freely discussed. However, be safe at all times, never simply meet someone online and jump straight in, so to speak.

[Read: How to have a perfect threesome with all the right rules]

Maybe you know someone in your life who may be up for this sort of thing, but in that case, careful communication is vital. If you simply jump in and ask them, they may take offense and never speak to you again. It’s a risk. So, hint a little, use ‘what do you think of this story I heard’ kinds of examples. Then, see what reaction you get. That’s the only way you can figure out whether you’ve found your potential unicorn or not.

Personally, I think it’s just better to go with the flow; regardless of which type of unicorn you were curious about. In the dating world, there are all types of “normal.” It depends on what you want and whether your partner is up for the same thing.

When you’re trying to find someone to click with, it’s also about embracing their negative points as much as their positive points. You’re not perfect, so how can you expect them to be?

Maybe you should quit asking how to find a unicorn and just see what happens with your love life or your sex life if it’s the other type you’re searching for. You’ll meet plenty of people throughout your lifetime who may or may not fit the bill. But I’m a firm believer in ‘if it’s meant to be, it will be.’ In my opinion, it’s just better to go with the flow than spend your time searching for a mythical creature that either doesn’t exist or is hard to find.

[Read: Going unicorn hunting? How to find the mythical third in no time]

How to find a unicorn? It’s extremely difficult! Searching for perfection is basically a waste of time. It’s far better to find someone who you vibe with, both on good days and bad days. 

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Nicky Curtis
Nicky Curtis
Having stumbled from one relationship drama to another throughout her 20s, Nicky is now somewhat of a guru in the crazy world of life and love. Telling it how i...

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