Does your man always stare at other women even when you’re around? It can be really annoying at times, and you may feel helpless too. But there is a way to stop him from staring at other woman. Find out here.
Men have always had a hard time keeping their eyes focused even when they are around their woman. They always have to stare at other women across the street. It’s almost like you’re helpless and you can’t do anything about it. Or can you?
All women have been there… and done that. By that we mean, we’ve all caught our men staring at other women and their assets, and we’ve all given them the cold shoulder until they came back crawling and sweet talking us into forgiving them. But what is it with men and their wandering eyes? They are supposedly in a happy relationship and they do love you, but there’s something about that girl’s legs or another girl’s breasts that gets his neck craning a complete circle to get a better view. It can be really annoying each time you tell him off, but you know nothing’s ever going to stop him.
Men stare as if they’re hypnotized and at most times, they need a thwack on the head to realize you exist. It’s alright to see your male friends stare at other women, but when your own man sizes up women in front of you, it’s obviously going to hurt you and your ego. Your male friends would say that they stare at women because they are so damn good looking, and that they envy God for having such outstanding creativity! But your boyfriend usually says “oh… I thought I knew that girl, serious… she reminded me of an old school friend.” Or maybe not… Most men do it, but they also add that they try their best not to, but it’s just their involuntary reflexes.
Men stare, better put, ogle. Period. But what they don’t understand is that we look at these guys as annoying men who just can’t seem to work the courage up to approach women. And besides, we’re not actually going to reciprocate the ogles of a coward, are we? But men don’t seem to care. And it’s probably because they know they’ll never have the courage to walk up and approach a girl, and ask her out. So they might as well size her up and register her assets as much as their brain can allow them to. It may be a furtive glance or a drooling stare, but researchers have revealed that an average man spends six months of his life leching at women! And his eyes make sure they get an average of eight sneaky stares each day, sometimes for up to two minutes at a stretch.
So now you know that trying to get rid of his habit is not going to be easy, actually, it’s not going to be possible. But the most important question is how do you handle it? And how do you change all that forever?
Click here to continue reading: How to Handle your Man’s Ogling Eyes
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.I think women should not take it personal or be offended because that is a personal insecurity thing. You should not feel as though your worth is your appearance and your man is with you for this reason and any attractive person is a threat simply because your man acknowledges this fact.
Men asses wide hips small waist, sizable breasts , height degree of fitness in muscle, skin tones, skin health, hair, facial coloration indicating health walking gate and posture. all these things are programmed in the mind for suitable partners, which make healthy off spring.
when a man falls in love with a woman his ability and desire to asses and evaluate the imagery that stimulate his mental programming doesn’t shut off. It doesn’t program its self to only recognize this woman he is with. believe me I wish it would!
If he stopped being attracted to these women which is what our wives and girl friends really want, that would also include you. Then there would only be love, which for a guy would seriously compromise his ability to get an erection.lol
yes I know blind men can get an erection. There are four ways men get erected.
1 physical stimulus which is not as fast as visual,
2.visual which everyone assumes is the only way
3. mentally, which most women rely on, but takes longer.
4. and being very relaxed, this is why you wake up erected when you are asleep, very comfortable, knocked out, or hanging.
women don’t need to be turned on to get pregnant, but guys do need imagery to perform the act, so guys are visual more than women have an excuse to be. The love he posses makes him fight this programming but its still there. if he doesn’t look he still wants to.
Its not personal. he will not go and chase after her.
If you are deeply upset you have issues. An attractive person is trying to get attention and has nothing to do with your man wanting to trade up. that is a ridiculous notion. Men simply like to look at eye candy variety. It has nothing to do with their hearts or their mates.
Women will never understand this concept because even if they restrain from looking at men that they would like to look at, men and women are still two different biological designs. Sexually, men are biologically and socially aggressive while women are defensive in the game so to speak.
So unless you somehow remove his sexual neurological glands and reproductive organs, his sexual engine will continue to acknowledge the imagery that stimulates it. This is why he wants to see you naked. You posses shapes and curves that register in his mind as female.
If he doesn’t look at other women who might posses these similar shapes and curves, he still really really wants to.
There is still something to be said that he also posses love for his wife or girl friend which he doesn’t for the simple image walking down the street. However with that being said. Men should understand that women will never understand this concept and should try to accommodate them as ridiculously impossible as it may feel when women solicit attention with make up perfected faces, in their never ending battle of female glamour competition.
When a man is with a woman he should resist his urge to look at the woman like a magazine picture if only for the sake of making your woman appear to others as though you no longer have interest in female anatomy
your wife wants to believe she has reprogrammed your biological design with her all consuming movie magic love, which made your brain only recognize her specific female shape as being female. and all other female images now appear to you receptive brain synapses as dudes.
This will make her feel better. Funny thing is even if a man doesn’t look, does it matter when you know he wants to?
However remember that self restraint with time will become habitual, just as not restraining. Even though you want to look and she wants you to pretend you don’t, try. Just try. You have the ability no refrain, so don’t lie to yourself., If you have a cousin you mentally program yourself not to check her out, as you do your mom and your sister.
It is by no means EASY, but possible and if you knew how painful and humiliating it is to women (who don’t and never will understand what it is like to be a man) you would give every effort to think as all those images walking by in high heels, tight or form fitting clothes make up, and hair salon (look at me) tricks and tools….as your sister.
P.S
the more porn,picture, videos and tv you watch the harder this will be to overcome.
and yeah I think someone mention sunglasses. Thats a good Idea but I’m sure everyone already knows and does this.
I’m attractive and try two look great at all times but my boyfriend off 5 years still looks he isn’t that good looking and don’t understand why he does it iv asked him not two he stops for a bit but then starts again I get very cross its affecting how I feel for him
I understand that boys will be boys but I also believe that when you become a man and are involved its a matter of being courteous. When you’re single have at enjoy all you want, but its a matter of respect. I’m not expecting for the whole “man genetic” code to be changed but seevem the most secure woman will question her attractiveness if this happens on a consistent basis. There have been many times that I’ve pointed out a pretty woman abd yes most women have some kind of beauty to them. When a man just purposely hunts it out online cause he’s bored or whatever the deal may be its disrespectful since you’re purposly searching. Yes I agree this may change your view on him. I can enjoy looking at men too ones that have nicer pecs or bigger arms than my husband and although he says he isn’t bothered he’s lying about the fact that if it were to be done repetitively he’d start questioning his physique. So kudos to the guy above who stated “try just try” because if you love someone and know something upsets them its mean to go out and purposely do it.
Even the most secure and confident woman will begin to have an altered sense of self and their own beauty if their man continued to do this. It’s rude, point blank. It’s like a form of seeing what else is out there, when you supposedly care about your woman. It sets up a dysfuntional cycle of wondering if your partner really finds you attractive. Women naturally want to feel feminine. When a man does this it really makes a women compare herself to other women’s standard of beauty.
It’s very rude when a guy ogles in front of his girlfriend.. and yes..they could stop if they wanted to..I can control who I stare at and out of respect for my boyfriend do not ogle at hot guys..To me they are searching for something else instead of enjoying what they already have and shows lack of committement on their part…I totally disagree when others say not to worry about it and that he loves you…If he loved you then he wouldn’t do it because he would be all into you and the relationship he has with you…get rid of his a#$..
I totally agree with you, I’ve been with my boyfriend for 5 years and have a daughter with him. He made me feel like I was worthless just after I gave birth, not that i felt good about how I was feeling about my body. But he kept staring at skinny girls all the time, and I was not fat (8 and a half stone). He kept doing it, and then one day he did it again and that was it, I thought to myself, well, if what he likes is skinny girls, then that is what I’m going to be and now I’m 7 stone with an eating disorder. I just feel like no matter what I do, I’ll never make him be grateful for what he’s got. I get told all the time that I’m a pretty girl and I’ve done some modelling too, but my self esteem is so low because men can’t be happy just looking at one girl, the one who loves them.
I agree strongly with Reetz, above…
I’ve been married for almost 19 years; we’ve been together for 22. He’s ALWAYS been “into” porn on some level, but more heavily since May of ’08, and he also had an “emotional affair” that same year with an old flame in another state when he was sent there for 30 days training by his employer…
I found out about the “old flame” from the hundreds of texts and hidden phone calls which were on the phone bill.
We went to counseling for awhile, which helped. They stopped communicating – and I also thought he stopped the porn, but no, he only learned to hide it better & deeper.
I found out that he’d never actually stopped looking, just this Jan.’12, when I needed a form off his laptop. I found hundreds – no, literally THOUSANDS of porn pictures! Some as deep as 9 folders down! Folders within folders within folders, etc.
Suffice it to say that if I had just 1.00 for every picture, we’d be completely out of debt!!! NO kidding!
This April, 2012, after yet another recent find, I talked, begged, pleaded, cried in his lap for him to please stop, that it hurt my feelings, that it was basically cheating via lusting after other women.
I can’t even begin to say how many times he’s lied right to my face or promised he’d stop. I’ve been keeping a detailed diary…
How can someone who is supposed to love, cherish, protect and be a friend, continue to ACTIVELY, DELIBERATELY SEARCH OUT PORN when he knows full well that it’s hurtful to his wife???
It’s wrong, it’s hurtful, it’s disrespectful, it’s abusive and it’s mean!
Thanks Nathan for sharing your views and taking the time to explain men! I am a woman in my 40′s and I have struggled with partners ogling for a long time now. Thanks to you I think I finally get it. Understanding how men think and feel makes this aspect about them less intimidating. Though it is still annoying of course. And you are right, I will never understand what it is like to be a man. This biological wiring in men also makes me feel like men are primitive, shallow beings, on perpetual heat! I would rather have a relationship with a woman……but it seems I’m not wired to be attracted to them, alas
. Thank you for your great letter.
I really think I’d rather be alone then be with a guy like this…I know I can love myself the way I should be loved,and I’m not going to settle for being treated that way.Men are highly over rated anyways and most can’t please you either.
The question is how does the author of the article shed her repulsive insecurity and also ask herself critically how much ‘leech’ time she got from her husband and how much leechin’ she herself dispensed in seducing him. Next time wear a burka so no one can leech off you.
The hypocrisy of insecure women has no bounds.
It is a fundamental biological drive in us men that you will never change, no matter the indignation, insults, whining, pleading and threats. You can choose to live with Mr dildo who is always loyal.
My guy really, really stared at women even in my presence, and I thought it’s kinda funny and a tad annoying. So I started ogling at hot looking guys in front of him. That effectively stopped his habit. He still looks at women, but not in that blatant drooling manner anymore
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Come on girls, you lot are not exactly blameless when it comes to oggling the opposite sex. This has happened to me many times when I have been in relationships and I’ve caught my girlfriend staring at other guys. Its happened the other way around too – I have been stared at by women who are out with their partners! In debates about human sexuality it seems to me its fashionable to portray men as being primitive letches who just can’t help being controlled by what’s in their underpants, whilst women are these ‘holier than thou’ creatures, governed by emotions and, compared to men, several notches up the evolutionary tree. A load of rubbish and absolute hypocrisy!
Lol my bf does this rarely which is good I mean I don’t think we can help it. But I only get mad if its like a hard core stare like eye her hardcore up and down and staring at her for like minutes then there’s a problem lol. If you’re guy did this then I would be worried. I do think women do this sometimes too but we mostly do it in secret :p
I have been with my Boyfriend for almost 9 years. He’s “ogle” has affected our relationship severely, so much so, that I am at a point of leaving him, our sex life has been affected by this and its starting to weight down on my personality (insecure-complex). I have had enough heartache over this enough tears has been shed. WORD to my Fellow-Girlfriend: “get rid of the bastard”
Me and my fiance is happy sometimes but he stares at my cousins photo on fb!!! Why
I mean she’s beautiful and a model. So I asked him why did he look at the photos
He said “she looks like her mother“ so I cried and he said I am just dum and weird!!! And since then we forgot about it … But he says he loves me… But he still talks about her
we have been together 3 yrs. We are both past 50. I finally told him that when he does this it says to the other woman that he is looking for better and it says to me that he is looking for better. Even if that isn’t the case, it is disrespectfull to both of us. So I have a plan I hope works. We are going to an event tonite where we don’t know anyone. I will ignor his glances and if it is the same woman more 3 times I will go to her and tell her my brother can’t keep his eyes off her and would she like to meet him. I’ll report back.
I find that the oogling only happends if I go out socially with the boyfriend, so if I do go out and the oogling starts. I will start going out with my girlfriends. If the oogling seems to continue I dump them, and look for another person to dump! Cause men start out in a new relationship wanting to spend their time looking at you. When they have you. You are no longer a conquest. So they are looking for the next conquest. Or at least looking until someone else decide to be taken up on the oogle. Any matter of looking at this issue, is a lack of respect. If you can not control your hormoes enough to make YOUR woman feel wanted. You do not deserve to have one! Get real, if it is a snake, call it a snake!
Bottom line women … Is putting all of that time and energy into loving and pleasing your man worth it? I recently remarried after being single for 15 wonderful years and it’s been hell on earth. My husband has hurt me so much with all of his out of control behavior. I am a former model, am very attractive and smart,and he’d prefer to oogle a stranger. Men in America are so f….d up because of the media and because women forgot their true worth. We’ve become walking whores just to get attention from males. How sad. They’d be happy looking at us in nap sacs if that was all we wore. If we all toned it down, and became more natural, nothing would change except women would have more money in their pockets to raise their children and retire respectfully.