How to Get a Guy to Text You First When They Basically Refuse to

Knowing how to get a guy to text you first is so useful. You won’t have to sit around debating when to send your first message if he sends one first.

how to get a guy to text you first

The dating game can be really frustrating. There are so many “rules” and they can get confusing after a while; he has to text first, you have to text first, you can’t send more than one text in a row, you can’t respond within an hour. It’s annoying but when you learn how to get a guy to text you first, it all changes.

Some guys aren’t even worth trying to get them to text first

While some guys just play hard to get by not texting you first, others just don’t care. Harsh? Maybe, but it’s the truth. If you just can’t get a guy to text you back no matter what, he probably just doesn’t like you enough to want to talk to you.

The guy you want to make an effort with is the one who actually likes you. He makes an effort during conversation and you have a real connection. But for some reason, he always lets you reach out first. [Read: What it means when he never texts you first but always replies]

How to get a guy to text you first when he never does

Some guys love chatting via text and others actually hate it. That being said, if a guy really likes you, you’ll be able to get him to text you first with a little help from us. Follow some of these tips and he’ll be texting you first in no time.

#1 Stop being available. You can’t just be free all the time. The more time he thinks you have to dedicate to him, the less likely it is that he’ll reach out and text you first. Plus, if you text him first all the time, he’ll probably assume you have the time to do it all the time.

So keep your distance. Don’t outright ignore or avoid him, but don’t be there whenever he wants you to be. The more he misses you, the more he’ll want to reach out and talk to you first. [Read: 13 signs you’re way too available for a guy]

#2 Give him a reason to text you. Why would he text you? Think of all the reasons he has aside from the fact that you think he likes you. Do you have decent conversations together? Does he see you doing stuff online and want to chat about it?

The point here is to prompt him to text you by posting something online you know he’ll want to see. If he sees you sharing stuff he’s into, he’ll probably reach out and comment on it.

#3 Determine how much he likes to text. Some guys really just don’t like texting. They’re really not the type to spend hours on their phone. Some guys just prefer to talk in person or even to talk on the phone.

He might indulge you in conversation every now and then but if he hates texting, he probably won’t be the one to initiate it in the first place. If he keeps the conversation short or tries to transitions discussions to in-person, he doesn’t like texting.

You really can’t do much about this if that’s the case. Instead, just try to remember this and even tell him to text you when he’s free. Giving him the instruction might help. [Read: 13 rules to follow when he stops texting you]

#4 Stop texting him first. If you want to know how to get a guy to text your first, remember that it’s all about being absent and making him miss you, really. Stop texting him first and tell him you have to get going. This is also a great opportunity to tell him to text you later so the ball is in his court.

The main idea, though, is to get him wanting to talk to you more. So by dipping out when the conversation isn’t over, you’ll be leaving him wanting more.

#5 Have a great time with him. Think about it. What’ll make a guy want to talk to a girl? When he likes her a whole hell of a lot. The more fun you have together, the more he’ll want to talk to you.

So the next time you two get together, make sure you have more fun. Laugh a lot more and tell more jokes. Make him miss you the second you leave his side and you’ll probably even have a text waiting for you when you get home. [Read: 20 fun and unconventional date ideas you can try]

#6 Give him a reason to remember you. When you talk to him or even hang out, make him remember you. He has to think about you when he gets home and even randomly throughout the day if you really want him to text you first.

That means you need to make a great impression. One way to do this is to just be funny. Make some jokes and laugh at his jokes. The more fun you have with him, the more he’ll remember you.

#7 Get along with his friends. This is assuming you’ve already met them and have hung out together. It’s becoming more and more common for guys to bring the girls they might want to date around their friends first just to see how she fits in.

You definitely want to fit in. The better you get along with his friends, the more likely he’ll be to text you. They’ll not only give him the okay to hang out with you, but he’ll be impressed and in awe of you, too.

#8 Call him out on it. In all honesty, he might not even realize what he’s doing. He also could just expect your texts and therefore won’t make the effort since he knows they’re coming.

Just ask him why he never texts you first. Tell him you love texting him first but aren’t sure when he’s free or when you may be bothering him. More likely than not, he’ll fix this. [Read: What to talk about on a first date]

#9 Tell him to text you later. Like I mentioned above a couple times, this is such a good way to get a guy to text you first. It might be annoying that you have to ask him, but just do it. Tell him to text you when he’s free so you can ask him something.

You have to actually ask him something, though. This tactic just works better because he’ll sit around wondering what on earth you have to ask him.

#10 Accept that he might not be into you. Guys who never text first but still respond are either not into texting, dumb, or not into you. If you’ve determined the other two aren’t the case, he could just not be that into you.

Accept this and stop texting him altogether. This may also get him to come around and actually text you first. However, if he’s not really into you, you may not hear from him again.

[Read: Should I text him first? Find the answer using 10 steps]

Learning how to get a guy to text you first can save you a lot of heartache. It’s all about making him like you and making him want to see you again. Do that and he’ll text you first all the time.

Liked what you just read? Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, we’ll be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life.

Bella Pope LovePanky
Annabel Rodgers
Annabel is a lifestyle writer, cheese enthusiast (Wisconsin native over here) and fantasy adventure author-in-progress who enjoys all things love, dog,...