There was a time in the not-so-distant past where there was no such thing as texting. Weird, right? We assume the world was probably a much kinder, well-put-together, and friendly place without cellphones… but, we digress. If you ask, am I texting too much, then you already likely know the answer.
Okay, we’ve probably been guilty of being clingy, one way or another. After all, there’s such a thin line that separates clinginess and affection, it can be hard to know the difference. But when starts to believe you’re a clingy texter, you might smother and suffocate your date *or crush* without meaning to.
There are unwritten rules for just about everything! So many that it is hard to keep up with them all, especially when texting. You worry if you are too forward, sending the right memes and photos, and most of all, that though, am I texting too much, may constantly nag your mind when you’re doing more of the texting.
[Read: How to text a guy without seeming desperate and overly needy]
When you’re a clingy texter, you WILL end up pushing away your date or crush. People often don’t like being suffocated, especially when they’re dealing with a needy or clingy person. We get that you’re so smitten by them that you probably find it hard to control your frequency of texting and what you text them.
However, you need to give them the breathing room to respond.
This is especially true if you just started dating – you’ll scare them away, and they’ll never want to see you again! If it’s your partner, they could feel suffocated in the relationship if they believe you text too much.
So it’s essential to reduce your pace if you’re asking yourself, am I texting too much. Internal issues most likely cause clinginess, but it could also be caused when you fall for someone way too fast *and they don’t like you just as much yet*.
This is a harmful habit that will likely sabotage all your current and future relationships if you don’t do something about this. It can even sabotage your chances of landing a date with your crush!
Want to know just what makes someone a clingy texter, and where to draw the line? Use this guide on double texts, the 15 rules and how to avoid it to make sure you’re never crossing that unwritten line of texting someone too much.
What is the text back rule? The golden rule of texting! Don’t ever text twice if you haven’t received an answer. Basically, wait to get a text back before you text again. We know… dumb.
But, if you play the game, you must play. Here are the ways to answer the question – am I texting too much?
Have you ever received a text back with a full, long answer, but they end the text by saying something about being really busy, out with friends, or swamped with work? That’s a big hint, and not something you should ignore.
At first, people are generally nice. They don’t just brand you a clingy texter or tell you that you text too much. It’s only when you miss all these subtle signs and continue texting them or bothering them that they’d start to get annoyed and ignore you.
So if someone tells you they’re busy or occupied with something, that’s your sign to totally back off. Text them a “have a nice day” and stop texting.
If they like you, they’ll text you back as soon as they’re free again. But if they don’t text you back again later in the day, that’s a huge red flag – they already think you’re texting too much! [Read: How to stop texting someone when that’s all you want to do]
Okay, this might sound like a Captain Obvious one, but you might not be listening to the Captain. If you even ask, you probably know the answer in your heart but convince yourself that it isn’t the case. Making up all sorts of reasons why they aren’t answering, you probably miss the most obvious one. You text them too much!
So, they stopped responding to let you know. You’ve suffocated and annoyed them to the point they stopped responding to your texts altogether. They’re not busy; they might just be trying to get some personal space from you! [Read: What to text a girl – Dos, don’ts, and all the secrets to know]
If you used to get paragraphs of words back, but now all you get are one-word answers, then you probably text them too much. One-word answers out of the blue mean one of two things. They’re either busy or trying to drop a hint for you to cool off with the excessive texting.
Either way, they’re hinting that you’re texting them way too much, or way too often.
They might not say so directly, but the fact they’re replying with dry responses speaks volumes. Their lack of enthusiasm in their texts shows everything you need to know if you’re a clingy texter or not. [Read: Dry texting and the real meaning behind their really short text responses]
You’d know this if you’re using any social media apps like Instagram or Whatsapp – you get an update when your message is delivered, and again, when your message is read by the recipient.
If their read receipts are off all of a sudden, that’s usually for a reason. It’s because you’re a clingy texter! If you used to get the read and now you get the delivered only, they don’t want to let you know when they’ve read the text.
If you receive “custom” messages, don’t assume they’re driving and being safe. If it happens all of a sudden, they’re trying to brush you off because you send way too many messages. Those types of automatic messages are meant to say, “back off, not now,” so get them.
Telling you excuses like texting or calling you later is basically a soft blow to sugarcoat what they really want to tell you *which is to stop texting them*. If they don’t follow through with their excuse, that’s all it is – an excuse. [Read: Being left on read – What it really means if they don’t text you back]
If you texted them over and over and they only answered once for every several texts of yours, that’s a clear sign you’re texting too much.
If they were as interested in texting you as you are in texting them, it’s pretty obvious they’d be sending you a lot of texts as well. If you’re asking yourself, am I texting too much, it’s crucial to know when to take the hint. If they’re not matching your texting energy, that’s a strong indicator you’re a clingy texter.
Don’t send them your life story. Texting is supposed to be spontaneous, fun, and quick. If you want to tell them a funny story that’s more like a novel, either pick up the phone to call them or just wait until you see them next time.
When you regularly send someone big paragraphs of texts, you’re expecting them to drop everything they’re doing and respond with an equally long answer. But really, would everyone be okay with that?
Of course, they may send a lengthy response the first few times. But if that changes to a quick one-word answer, know that this is completely intentional. They’re making it very obvious that you’re texting too much, and they’re not interested in reading what you’ve written. If you experience this, not only are you texting too much, you’ve lost their interest as well! [Read: Are you boring them? 20 signs they’ve lost interest and you need to walk away]
This is a harsh one, but you can know for sure you’re texting too much when they turn off their phone just to avoid your texts.
If you are unsure if your texts even go through because there is nothing on the other end, then they likely blocked you or turned their phone off completely.
If they wait several days to answer you back, then you’re texting too much. Whatever their reason for the delayed response, being overly anxious and continuing to text when it isn’t reciprocated makes you appear needy and desperate. If they wait, then you wait too.
Sure, we hate games too, but if you don’t play the game, then you’ll just appear overeager and clingy. The fact that they wait several days to text you back indicates one of two things – they don’t like you, or you’re texting too much.
So if you’re asking, am I texting too much, it’s a definite yes if they don’t text you back within a day or two. [Read: How to text a girl who stopped responding and win her interest back]
If you notice that when you are out with them, they don’t really bother with their phone – they silence it or don’t even take it out of their bag – first of all, good for you, you’ve found someone who is totally interested in being around you instead of ignoring you for their phone!
But, that also means that they probably aren’t the “texting type,” which means that your relentless text messages are not going to get them to answer but probably irritate them when they finally get around to picking their phone up. [Read: How often should you text a girl? 17 must-know rules of texting]
Emojis were invented for a reason, you know? It brings life to texts and helps you prove a point occasionally. So as not to be misunderstood, we add these annoying little expressions of emotions so that you know what type of mood we are in.
You are over-texting if they used to send emojis often, and now suddenly they don’t really care how you read their texts. That’s your sign to stop texting.
The fact that they went from texting with emojis to suddenly not using them at all might show you’re a clingy texter. So if you’re asking, am I texting too much, watch out for the consistency they use in emojis. This rule applies not just to girls but guys as well! Some guys also use emojis when texting, so if they stop, you might be over-texting! [Read: 17 flirty, cute & naughty emojis guys use when they like you]
Do they reply to your texts, but they almost never initiate a conversation themselves? That’s a big clue to keep an eye on.
If someone likes you, conversations generally flow both ways. It’s not easy to come up with something new and fascinating with each new text, so both texters make the effort to keep things interesting.
But if they think you’re texting too much, you’d see that they don’t initiate any texts, and instead, just stick to answering back. Sometimes, they may not even ask you a question back in return. So if you notice this sign, know that you definitely are texting way too much! [Read: What it means when someone never texts you first but always replies]
Your frequent texting means that nothing is left to the imagination when you’re texting each other for hours every night. And that’s clearly a sign of over-texting.
Remember to keep your texts casual and trivial. Talk about their day, talk about yours, but don’t get into deep or meaningful conversations over text – save them for dates or phone conversations. It’s a bit of a pain to type so much, and worse, you’ll have nothing to say to each other when you finally see meet in person.
You feel insecure, and that makes you want to text more often. But you need to understand that this is a vicious cycle that just pushes them further away from you and your texts.
When you start to feel like someone may not like you, or if you believe they’re losing interest in you, don’t text them more often just to stay in touch. Your texts would start to sound drier and annoy the other person as well.
If you feel insecure, get to the base of the issue instead of texting more often. What makes you feel like they’re losing interest in you? [Read: 28 flirty ways to text your crush and keep them really interested in you]
Are you always the one to text back within a couple of minutes after receiving their text? Do they do the same for you as well? If you don’t want to text them too much, or appear more eager than they are, always try to keep the balance while texting.
If they usually take a couple of hours to text you back, but you text back within a minute every time, perhaps it’s time to slow down!
This isn’t about playing games, but about leveling the texting to-and-fro. If you don’t want to be a clingy texter, never make the other person believe you’re overly eager to hear from them and have nothing better to do all day. Nothing screams clingy and overtexting like someone who’s spending all their time just waiting for a text from their crush. [Read: Texting etiquette – 26 rules all guys and girls must know]
When you haven’t heard back from them or received a response to your previous message, it might be tempting to “check in” and see how they are doing. No, this subtle double text doesn’t show care or concern. It just makes anyone want to roll their eyes all the way to the back of their head!
Take it easy for a day or two. Allow them to make their way over to you. The more you force them to text you back, the more they’d want to avoid texting you back. [Read: Why do guys stop texting for a few days and leave us wondering?]
Dating these days comes with all sorts of rules. If it isn’t social media or text messaging, there are all types of terms and unwritten rules to follow that can be, well, exhausting.
If you think you might be texting too much, take a step back before they make it clear that they need space from you.
Always make them believe they want you more. If you get this delicate balance right, you’ll realize that texting is fun and relaxing, as it should be!
[Read: How to not be a boring texter and keep your crush interested]
If you think your answer is yes to ‘am I texting too much,’ blowing up their cellphone isn’t going to get you into their good graces. Slow down your pace and stop flooding their phone with notifications. Let them text first instead of constantly double texting.
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