It can be hard to know what types of questions to ask early in dating without hitting a nerve or risking sounding a little intrusive. Preparation is key! In that case, start with these 21 questions for new couples to ask one another.
You never really know someone until you’ve been in their life a while and delved a little deeply. In some cases, what you find can be a very welcome surprise. In other cases, it can be a minor nightmare come true. Regardless, the start of any relationship means that you’re treading on water, finding things out about one other, and figuring out how it all fits into the grand scheme of your new union.
However, let’s make one thing clear – never simply fire these questions at your partner like they’re on an episode of Mastermind. Maybe you don’t remember that TV show, but it was almost like a police interrogation. You don’t need a clipboard to record the answers, you don’t need to shine a light in their eyes to make sure they’re listening – just be casual and throw these questions into your conversations over time. You’ll be amazed at what you learn!
[Read: 20 would you rather questions for couples who want to go deeper]
21 questions for new couples to ask one another
Be prepared to be amazed at some of the answers that will come your way!
#1 What is on your bucket list? Everyone has a list of things they want to do in their lives, whether they have actually pre-prepared it or not. You can understand a person’s dreams from what they have on their bucket list and how determined they are to tick those items off. This is definitely one of the 21 questions for new couples to ask! [Read: 20 things that should be on every couples bucklist]
#2 Where have you always wanted to travel to? Is your new partner a sun person or do they prefer the cold? Are they a city lover or a beach person? It’s interesting what you can find out about someone based on where they want to travel.
#3 Do you see yourself always living here? Do they have aspirations to move elsewhere? That’s a deal breaker for some, so it’s definitely one of the 21 questions for new couples to ask one another ahead of time.
#4 Do you want children in the future? This is a good one to weave into a casual conversation because it helps you understand whether you’re both on the same page in terms of what you want in the distant future. [Read: 50 relationship questions to test your compatibility instantly]
#5 What first attracted you to me? This is no doubt a question you’ve wondered and not had the nerve to ask! Go ahead and ask, you might be surprised by the answer, but be prepared to give your answer to your partner too!
#6 What is your favorite memory from your childhood? You can learn a lot about a person based on their favorite childhood memory so make it one of the 21 questions for new couples to ask.
#7 If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? This is an interesting one to learn! If your partner had the power to change something about themselves, finding out what that is could allow you a greater insight into their personalty and thoughts.
#8 What are you grateful for in your life? This is one of the 21 questions for new couples to ask because it shows you whether your partner is a real family person, whether they’re job orientated, materialization, or whether they focus on experiences.
#9 If you were to have a perfect day, what would it look like? This is a great question because it might give you some useful ideas for the next date night when it’s your turn to plan! [Read: Want a really fun date night? Try these drinking games for two]
#10 Be honest, do you really trust me? This is a serious question to ask, so make sure your body language is in line with your words. But it’s a good one nonetheless. This could lead to a deeper conversation about the future of your relationship.
#11 What does a healthy relationship look like to you? Again, this gives you information on what your partner expects in a relationship and the boundaries they might want to put into place. These sorts of questions lead to deeper conversations.
#12 What do you want to know about me, but you daren’t ask? Everyone has something they want to ask but haven’t had the nerve to come out with yet. This is their permission to ask you! [Read: What exactly is soul gazing? Learn how to foster a deeper connection]
#13 Have you ever been in love before? While you don’t have to initiate a deep conversation about past loves, it’s interesting to learn about whether your partner has ever been in a committed relationship before. As a result, it’s one of the 21 questions for new couples to explore.
#14 What is your favorite film and why? You can learn a lot about someone by their choice of film. When they give you a reason why that movie is their number one, you learn even more.
#15 When you listen to music, do you hear the sounds or the words? I always think that people tend to fall into two categories – the beats or the words. Which is your partner?
#16 What is your favorite quote? I love quotes and love it when someone tells me their special words. It’s a good question to ask your partner. If they can’t think of one, it might encourage them to find a new quote to live their life by.
#17 What is your single biggest regret in life? This is one of the most important 21 questions for new couples because it helps to discover about your new partner’s past and what makes them tick. They’ll open up you to in ways they never did before. [Read: The 9 big emotional needs in a relationship that hold it all together]
#18 What is your favorite thing about me? Go on, ask! You know you want to! You might be surprised at their answer too.
#19 Does your job fulfill you? This will help you learn what types of things your partner might want to do work-wise in the future and whether or not they see any major changes on the horizon. These are things you need to know about if you’re in a relationship with someone!
#20 What was your biggest dream as a child? Again, this helps your partner to open up to you. You can share your answer and open up to them too. It’s one of the best 21 question for new couples to ask because it initiates a deep and meaningful conversation. [Read: 20 questions to ask your lover and learn everything you need to know]
#21 If we could do one thing right now, what would it be? This could give you some great ideas of new things to do together and ways to spice up your love life!
Asking careful questions means that you’re able to delve into deeper subjects with your partner. This might surprise you and could really enhance your relationship in the process. You might learn new things that you never imagined. It’s also a great way to bring humor and depth into the time you spend together.
[Read: Cute relationship goals all new couples need in their cute checklist]
Try these 21 questions for new couples. It’s a great way to find out more and could really help you to open up to each other, enhancing the connection you share in your new relationship together.
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